Disclaimed
The Prompt:
Pairing Preference: Kaldur/Artemis
Prompt Item/Idea/Word: Kaldur discovers he's attracted to Artemis, flirts with her
Prompt Line: Why did she always have to talk about getting naked in a fun way?
Preferred Age Rating: T
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'Catchphrase'
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This was an enigma. It was something completely apart from his personality and a mystery that intrigued him all the same. It was the way that his eyes would wander carelessly about and find one certain figure in a crowded room. At some point, how his ears would pick up a single word in her caustically toned voice amongst several simultaneous conversations. He was even at the point that he would unintentionally seek her out, with nothing to say only his desire to be around her. It was quickly becoming downright maddening to the Atlantian teen.
Kaldur sighed, tearing his eyes from his set gaze. A quick glance around proved comforting as none of the other members noticed where his eyes had been resting. They were all too consumed with the activity of their own training. Something that he should be just as immersed in, rather than his mutinous thoughts. Kaldur scowled as he brought his palm hard against the wooden post in front of him, a reverberating crack ringing out. He let his palm rest against the wood, feeling the pressure against his hand as his eyes drifted back across the room. Kaldur sighed once more, closing his eyes momentarily before pulling out of his stance. He was done for the day.
Ignoring the curious glances of his now attentive teammates, Kaldur left the gym. Entering the locker room he stripped quickly, grabbing a towel, and looking forward to the familiarity of water. He locked himself in the first stall he saw and turned the water on full blast without allowing himself to adjust to the temperature. In truth, he had never needed to adjust before; water to him was just that. Water. It was comforting no matter what the temperature happened to be. Today, the water was a brisk cold against his overheated skin and Kaldur could almost picture steam forming from behind closed lids. A small smile quirked at the corners of his mouth at the absurdity of the image, but he went on to relax under the cool man-made water fall.
Towel around his neck sometime later, Kaldur felt much better as he entered the quiet corridor dressed in fresh clothes. As far as he had known none of the others had left the gym yet; or had exited through the locker room at least. Repulsion etched into his facial features for a mere second as he considered the unhygienic habits of the other male team members. They would tend to forgo bathing after long training session in favor of 'sleeping it off', no matter how strong their stench was. Kaldur was too busy processing the thought to be startled by the low chuckle that originated from the left of the doorway.
"They didn't shower again, if that's what you're thinking about," the very dry, very feminine, and very plaguing voice that he had tried to push from his mind every time he saw its owner drifted to his ears.
With an internal sigh and the desire to smack his hand to his face (or what Wally and Robin liked to call a 'facepalm'), Kaldur responded evenly, "They are showing signs of bad hygienic habits. I have spoken to Batman about the issue, but he assures me that it is normal teenage behavior."
"I just thought most guys compete via odor," Artemis shrugged, falling into step with her retreating leader. "Because showering means getting naked and the only thing guys think about is getting naked in the fun way…Er…Well, except the few chivalrous ones like you."
"A compliment to distract from the overall intention of the statement," Kaldur's lips quirked up into a smile once more as he continued. "I feel as though you might be trying to 'coin a phrase' there."
"If it wasn't you I was talking to, I might think you were making fun of me," Artemis swayed just enough to bump her shoulder into Kaldur's arm lightly. "Besides there is nothing wrong with 'getting naked in the fun way'."
'Why did she always have to talk about getting naked in a fun way?' Kaldur thought, rolling his eyes. 'Even out of nowhere she erratically adds it to the conversation as though it belongs.'
"Must you continue to talk about 'getting naked in a fun way', Artemis?" Kaldur spoke after the short silence, at the blonde's dumbfounded look he continued. "If you continuously drop your new catch phrase as haphazardly as you have been, Wally may overhear you and become overly…excited."
The look on Artemis' face quickly shifted to an expression of pure shock fighting with pure glee. Her voice was about half an octave higher as she replied, "Did you really just make a sexual joke? A reference to male arousal of all things? Wally's arousal at that? And you said 'getting naked in a fun way' too! This has got to be the best day ever! Why don't I have a video camera or something? I wonder if Robin can hack into the Cave's audio feed. What do you think?"
"Perhaps I was out of line for such a thing," Kaldur smiled politely ignoring the girl's last question. She didn't seem to notice through her giggling. Wait. Artemis was giggling. She was giggling at something he had said. This was definitely not normal. "Allow me to offer my sincerest apologies; I do not know where my manners have escaped to in that short lapse of time."
"No," Artemis managed to breathe out between her laughter. "It's fine. Really. You should joke around more often. I think it puts you more on the level with the team."
"Is that another phrase you are trying to 'coin'?"
"No, I'm serious," Artemis turned towards him, halting their walk by placing a firm hand on his bicep. Kaldur acknowledged the grip and turned to face the archer. "You're always so formal and courteous, it's like you grew up in another world…actually that was a really stupid thing to say, since you did grow up in a practically different world. I know that it was probably a custom to not use contractions and word things correctly and not use slang and not making run-on sentences with too many conjunctions instead of acknowledging commas. I just think that we could all relate to you better if you did those things a little less and we could try to lessen our vulgarity or something. I mean, I know that I could stop mentioning the whole 'getting naked in a fun way' thing if it made you—"
"Artemis, you are ranting," Kaldur cut the girl off at the mention of her new catchphrase. "You seem to be nervous. Are you under duress at the time?"
"Sorry," Artemis released her grasp on the Atlantian and started down the corridor once more. "I do that time to time. You just ended up being the victim this time around."
"It is quite fine, but are you sure that you are well?"
"No, no. I'm okay. But I feel like I should be asking if you're the one that's okay?" Artemis raised an eyebrow and smirked in his direction. Kaldur couldn't help the light flush that warmed his cheeks.
"I beg your pardon?" Kaldur managed in a calm tone.
"You actually interrupted me," the smirk turned into a pretty grin that caused the boy to blush even more heavily. "Maybe you're breaking your customs more than we realize, I guess."
"Perhaps I am," Kaldur agreed, a new smile gracing his lips. The pair fell silent as they continued their aimless trek through the mountain.
This time Kaldur broke the silence. "Perhaps I should make jokes of the sexual nature more often."
Artemis turned wide eyes to her companion once more, taking in his confident smirk and playful expression with surprise. Once she regained her sense, she shoved his lightly to the side, "I can imagine Wally and Robin's expressions already."
"Just as I can hear Conner asking Megan questions as well," he added, pushing Artemis back with less force than she had used. His hand warmed the moment his skin brushed hers and tingled as he pulled back. He was positive his face had to be dark red by now.
"Then Red Tornado and Black Canary trying to explain without really explaining!" Artemis laughed, leaning against his side for support.
"Of course Batman would then come and—"
"Suck the fun out of the joke," the two had stopped walking to lean on one another to support themselves from falling out due to their laughter.
"How is it that the Batman has garnered such a reputation with the team in such a short period of time?" Kaldur asked wiping at his eyes as they righted themselves. Artemis shrugged.
"It's The Batman. He comes with that reputation," Artemis grinned up at him, not moving away as she slung an arm around his waist. She then pulled his arm to rest over her shoulders. "I really wish he would intimidate the other boys to be more hygienic. If they all smelled like you, I might actually try to get along with Wally."
"I am unsure whether I should be flattered by that comment or not," Kaldur smiled back at the shorter blonde, brushing her neck lightly as he pushed her long ponytail from under his forearm. He swore that a small flush was staining her own cheeks instead of his.
"Although it's not much, I would prefer you to be flattered. I'd much rather smell you over Wally any day," Artemis chuckled as they set off once more down the corridor.
"Then I thank you kindly for the compliment, Artemis," Kaldur grinned to himself, arm relaxing around the girl's slight shoulders. "I especially enjoy the fact that there was no obtuse statement to be covered up by it."
"That's not fair!" Kaldur chuckled even through the elbow to the ribs as Artemis frowned.
"Then I apologize once more for my words," Kaldur couldn't help the mocking undertone that seeped into his voice as he spoke. Artemis rolled her eyes and pouted.
"I'll only accept the apology on once condition."
"What is this one condition?" Kaldur brow rose suspiciously at the blonde tucked under his arm almost intimately.
"Nope," Artemis popped her 'p' obnoxiously. "You have to agree first."
"That would be an unwise thing to do," Kaldur couldn't help but to point out. "It would be far more intelligent to hear the condition first."
"And that would be the wimpy thing to do," Artemis muttered condescendingly.
"I will not fall for such petty baiting, Artemis," Kaldur sighed in false disappointment. "I am not Wally."
"Thank god for little favors," Artemis sighed herself, but in relief.
"Now I am a favor as well? You truly are feeling generous with your praise today," Kaldur grinned to himself. Sarcasm wasn't his forte as it was called the lowest form of wit, but after spending so much time around the archer he had picked it up on the rarest of occasions.
"Fine, you can have this round. Using my own weapon against me," Artemis murmured to herself, with another elbow into his side. "Just let me think of something."
"You had not thought of a condition when we began bartering?" Kaldur asked the thinking blonde skeptically.
"Of course not," she said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "I wanted to make sure it was something good. Something worth it."
Kaldur said nothing, instead chose to roll his eyes and let the blonde think.
"Ah ha! Got it!" The sudden exclamation didn't even startle him.
"Very well. What is it?" Kaldur asked with a heavy sigh, looking down at the archer. She grinned up at him in return.
"You have to use my newly coined phrase in front of the team," as soon as she had said it, he noticed the more mischievous details of her grinning face.
"Artemis, why is it that you have an obsession with 'getting naked in the fun way'? I feel as though you should speak to Black—" Kaldur cut himself off. Artemis was laughing once more.
"I really just had to hear you say it again," she managed between laughs. "It's just priceless."
"You are an odd woman," Kaldur stated as he shook his head slowly.
"And you still have to say it in front of the team, you unintentionally funny man, you," Artemis mocked his statement and head shake dramatically, her long mane brushing against his should and ending up slung over his wrist.
"That is two conditions. We have yet to agree on one," the protest was weak, but Kaldur felt as though he should. Even if it was just to prolong his chance to have his arm around his shoulder.
"Your silence was taken as agreement," Artemis pulled away from his side and blocked his path. Her hands were on her hips and as triumphant smirk on her face.
"That is not how it works."
"It does now."
"I will not be a part of this."
"Yeah, yeah," Artemis rolled her eyes as she grinned almost condescendingly at the Atlantian teen. "I better get going though. Mom's expecting me home for dinner. We should do this again."
"This?"
"Yeah, hang out. Just the two of us," Artemis' cheek were a pretty pink as she said this. "I can help you break away from the formal customs that we talked about."
"Ah. Of course," Kaldur nodded. Artemis fidgeted slightly. "And we can work on your obsession with getting naked."
The blonde girl was bright red now, but she nodded as she managed to stand on her toes and brush her lips against Kaldur's own red cheek lightly. "But only in the fun way."
She was already through the door to their right by the time Kaldur regained his sense. He watched her retreating form until the door slid completely closed. The entire time a goofy grin that would befit Wally had formed on his face.
"Definitely in the fun way."
Overused phrase is overused.
Darn you rampaging plot bunnies!
Okay. I'm going to be honest. I really read through, like, ten different guides to flirting. Seriously. I don't know how to write people flirting! Hell, who am I kidding? I don't even know when I'm flirting half the time. Between you guys and me, I didn't learn a damn thing from reading the guides either; so I played it by ear. Hopefully, it came out at flirty-esque.
And yes, Batman is an 'it'. I don't know why but I find that hilarious for some reason. I don't know why I wrote it like that.
That, dear readers, was the lovely, infectious prompts (of so many that I want to write!) of the one hundredth review to Cracks in a Mountain: anubislover. It was definitely a fabulous fun prompt to work with, although I was a bit stumped at the beginning and had to write the start about four million times over (hyperbole, yes!).
Hopefully, anubislover is satisfied with the end result! If not, then I'll have to mean serious business and write another one….something I might do anyways!
Until next time!
(You're all wonderful and great!)