One shot. I do now own The Mortal Instruments*
Magnus Bane's journal from the time in the middle of City of Fallen Angels~~
So I kind of really love Magnus and Alec really bothers because he's stupid and doesn't understand. So I wrote this, thinking of Magnus ranting in a leather bound book in his glittery room (Y) I don't know why, but its quite a "Magnus" moment for me. Hope you like it~
Review?
I really don't understand his logic. Doesn't he understand? I want him to live with me forever, of course I do. I love Alec, but he just doesn't understand. I don't want to put that curse on him, the curse of immortality. I mean, every few decades or so, you watch everyone you love die. I don't want to put him through that, like I've been putting up with for 600 years. Why can't he see I'm trying to protect him? I don't get it! But he'll see. When he's on death's doorstep, he'll understand. He'll understand the beauty of death, and how lucky he is that he was born a mortal, unlike me. Plus, when you're a warlock, everyone has a natural strong dislike for you, just because you're part demon. That's probably one of the only reasons. They hate you, because demons are the things shadowhunters are trying to rid the world of, and we're here; mocking them. I mean, why not kill us warlocks also? Our living in general is just a casual reminder that we're still here, still on the planet and there's nothing you can do about it, because the Clave forbids the killing of downworlders or Humans. Since you know, we're half human, which makes us part mundane, but also part demon, which make's us a type of downworlder. Anyway, I don't want people hating Alec like that. He's the sweetest person I've met in the longest time, and I treasure his pure heart, and don't want to waste a precious life and soul like Alec's. Alec Lightwood. Whoever thought he would ever be mine… I must be the luckiest man on earth, to get someone as wonderful as Alec. But if I told him that, he wouldn't believe me, and that thought brings tears to my cat eyes. I don't understand, I don't understand…. I'm such a wreck... and when he accused me of sleeping with Will... that hurt more then i can was like he came and pierced my heart with a seraph blade... Can't he understand that I can't live by myself? Did he really think i could live my whole life waiting for one person to come along? Of course not! Can't he understand that I love him? Clearly not because he's not talking to me now and im not sure why. I love Alec, and isn't that all that matters? Apparently not. I don't understand what he's thinking. I love him more then I've loved anyone else; and that happens to be a lot of people. I want to explain to him so badly, but I know it will only make him angrier, so I keep my thought to myself. Sometimes i wonder though, what his reply would be if i sat him down, and told him this. I guess I'll never know. I don't have the guts to tell him, as much as i want to.
-Magnus Bane
*What'd you think? I know… really short… but still… review~!