Disclaimer: I in no way own Kingdom Hearts. Don't sue; I'm simply an E5 in the USN, therefore I have no money. Ha.

A/N: Tried to make this game-based, but hey! I don't have KH2. This was written in September after I'd finally blown the dust off of KH: CoM and said 'Hey, I should beat this silly thing some year.' So I did, then I pondered, then I shrugged and made a quickie pair of fics. Set after Sora and the gang awaken from the end of CoM and get back out onto the roads, before KH2 (obviously). Twin-fic to 'That One's Destiny Islands.' Twin fic should be posted within a couple of days.

-BEGIN FIC-

So, which one's Destiny Islands?

That's a question I ask myself every night as I peer into the heavens, my hands folded behind my head and my eyes focused on those glittering points that I had once considered just pretty flares of light piercing the eerily abundant darkness or distant stars but now knew to be separate worlds of light, their hearts beating strong and free once again. I knew one of them had to be my home. After all, with Ansem defeated and Kingdom Hearts locked, the worlds that had been consumed by darkness were finally restored. The walls of separation had been reconstructed. Everyone had returned home.

Well, everyone except three people.

Myself.

King Mickey.

Riku.

I still don't understand that. Every time I ponder that oddity, I get overrun by a plethora of emotion. I can't help but feel anger, sadness, perhaps a certain aspect of joy, miserable realization that things may never return to being ideal again.

I had completely believed that when Leon and Aerith had said that sealing the source of Ansem's power, defeating him and sealing the darkness that poured from Kingdom Hearts, it would return everyone to their rightful places. I suspect that in most cases it did. After all, Donald and Goofy returned to Disney Kingdom to be reunited with their loved ones. I haven't seen Cid or a single moogle or that blonde man I faced in the tournaments at the Coliseum (I do believe the tournament listing game his name as 'Cloud') since shutting that massive set of doors. I haven't seen a Princess of Heart, a single ghost from Halloween Town, Ariel, Pooh, or any of the interesting and varied folk I met on my rather incredible journey. I can simply hope that they all returned to where they were supposed to be, or in most cases remained in their saved worlds, free of the Heartless and of worry.

I had believed that when Ansem fell and the worlds were restored, Kairi, Riku and I would be reunited. That we'd all be returned to Destiny Islands, free to return to our carefree lives where nothing could go wrong and we were all best of friends.

Kairi returned. I saw Destiny Islands recreated before my very eyes. I held her hand in mine for one brief instant. Then everything was ripped away. Those palm trees, those shacks, those lapping waves I lusted to return to, that sand I longed to bury my toes in once more drifted away, fading into the mist that was recreating the infernal barrier that keeps all worlds separated and my new friends from being seen once again. Kairi had faded with that island paradise, her violet eyes wide and glistening with tears.

I still don't know if we'll ever see each other again.

I want to. I have to. I still have to give her back her lucky charm.

That's why I have to figure out which star is Destiny Islands. That's why I have to figure out how to penetrate the world barriers and return to my home.

I should be there, but instead I'm in Disney Kingdom. I'm at the sides of Donald and Goofy, my friends who helped me through all things thick and thin over the course of our journey. The friends who put their backs to the doors of Kingdom Hearts and helped me push them shut against the ensuing wave of Heartless that threatened to burst free from its depths at any moment.

Being here with them, while it's pleasant enough and makes me smile to be with my friends, makes me sad at the same time.

They got to go home. Why didn't I?

And why didn't King Mickey?

Every time I've seen the Queen, every time I've seen her jovial face bearing grieving eyes, I feel pain. How could I possibly explain why we did what we did? How could I tell her the rational reason behind shutting those doors with her King standing right on the other side, his keyblade in his hand, his light pouring through the darkness and his smile confident and easy?

He deserved to come home. However, there's been no sign of him. Pluto had a letter in his mouth bearing the King's seal – however, that's been our only indication that the King is indeed alive somewhere.

He locked himself into darkness for his people. He made a valiant sacrifice, but he's hurt so many people. His Queen. His subjects. His friends.

He's broken so many hearts. He should have come back.

I sigh as I feel my eyes mist over, still staring at those stars and trying to find Destiny Islands.

At times, especially on nights like this when I've nothing to do but lay in the grass and think about events that took place so long ago, I wonder if perhaps I should have been the keybearer on the other side of that door.

Ansem's machine did state that there had to be two keys to seal the door to darkness. It never said which one had to be on what side.

Our keyblades were equal – his with its hilt of silver and shaft and keychain of gold, mine its exact inverse. I don't think it would have made a difference as to who was where, so long as the door got shut and the keyhole was locked.

Then I wouldn't always have such pain in my heart when I think of him. I would be with him. Riku.

Even if I were to never return to Destiny Islands, if I were to never see Kairi again, if I were to never be able to wander with Goofy and Donald again in my life, I would be with Riku. The boy I've been through everything with. My greatest rival and my best friend since we were tiny children exploring the islands that were included in the coagulation of land masses that was considered our home and pretending that there were monsters skittering about in the Secret Place. My strength, my joy, my competition, my heart. He was everything before Kairi came, then she became his equal.

I would miss Kairi, certainly. However, I could go on with the knowledge that she is safe. I would be with Riku. I would have him at my side, not on the other side of the barrier between light and darkness.

We should all be on Destiny Islands. As I look in the heavens, I wish longingly for him to be there, for him to be with Kairi, for him to be sitting on that bent papou tree and staring into the ocean's waves as he always used to. That right now, we'd be looking at one another without even realizing it.

I know it's sheer fantasy, though.

I know deep within my heart that, as it is with King Mickey, Riku hasn't gone home.

He's still caught in that world of darkness, trapped behind the doors to Kingdom Hearts. All because he had to be a selfless idiot and pull them shut, sealing himself from me.

I blink. Feeling a wet track of tears trickle down my cheek, I frown.

I miss Kairi so much. Her laugh, her smile, her glittering eyes that always drove me and Riku to each other's throats in playful competition. I miss sitting by her side on the pier, looking at the waves and wondering what lies beyond the ocean's infinite expanse. I know that she's alright. She's alive, waiting for me to return.

That brings a smile to my lips.

I miss Riku so much. His smirk, his sarcasm, his endless patience with me and willingness to continue to spar despite my constant losses – everyone else he got tired of, discarding them after a few matches; I was the only one he allowed to return time and time again. I miss sitting by him on the papou tree, looking at him and wondering what exactly turns over time and time again in the mind behind those brilliant aquamarine eyes. Unlike Kairi, I don't know if he's alright. I don't know if he's even alive anymore.

That brings tears to my eyes.

Perhaps the grim reality is what's spurred the continuing change in me. Donald and Goofy comment on me from time to time, spurring me to smile and try to cheer me up when I'm in these dismal moods that seem to occur with rising frequency. Goofy was concerned when I abandoned my bright and cheerful clothing for the dark fabrics I now wear, wondering if perhaps my despondent attitude was starting to get the better of me. Donald made fun of me, telling me that it looked like I was trying to costume myself as a Heartless and failing miserably.

What they don't understand is that this is neither. I just remember how Riku used to dress. He always liked darker colors, the only cheerfully bright article ini his ensemble being his shirt. Call it my memorial of him.

After all, he might already be dead.

I've got to retain his memory somehow. I've got to ensure that the good person Riku was, the boy who helped me up when I fell, the boy who always encouraged me to do my best, the boy who's voice gave me strength when I was faced with the impossible challenge of Ansem and his guardian without the aid of my friends, the boy who helped me shut those damned doors on him, is remembered in some small way.

It's harder to smile these days. It's difficult to retain my cheer. After all, it's been so very long since we shut those doors. It's been so very long since we started our madcap search for the door to the light, seeking a way to release their King and my best friend from the darkness they'd sacrificed themselves to.

Either release them, or find their cold corpses waiting for us with their hearts taken by the Heartless they've been imprisoned with and their bodies ravaged by Kingdom Hearts itself.

Lifting a hand, I wipe the tears from my eyes even as I hear Donald sigh and Goofy rise form his place by the fire. Soon my view of the heavens is blocked by his large nose and his concerned eyes.

"You alright, Sora?" he asks, his voice soft and flooded with concern.

I nod slightly, my hair rustling in the grass that I lay in. "Yeah."

Donald utters a grumbled lack of confidence in the validity of my statement before walking over as well, standing by Goofy's side and blocking more of the sky with his bill. "Then what're you crying for?" he bluntly asks, all of Goofy's gentle subtlety missing.

My lips twist into a frown. "Just thinking."

"Oh," Goofy says, nodding slightly as he backs away and chooses instead to sit at my side. "You're thinkin' about Riku again, aren't'cha?"

"Yeah. Him and King Mickey have been missing for so long," I quietly confirm.

"Ah, phooey," Donald huffs as he plops down at my other side, turning his head to stare into the sky as well. "They're alright, Sora. You have to believe that."

"Donald's right," Goofy interjects. "They'll do just fine. After all, they've got each other to lean against when the goin' gets tough. They're just waitin' for us to find the door."

"So smile already!" Donald demands.

I faintly smile, turning my gaze away from my companions and back to the heavens.

I could only pray they were right. That King Mickey was fine, his keyblade still carrying his strength, his swipe with that weapon still powerful and sure. That Riku was fine, walking at the King's side with his arms crossed over his chest and glaring with his iridescent eyes at the hateful darkness around him.

I could only pray that they were either surviving, their sanity miraculously intact (after all, how long can a person go without light and not go mad?) or that they'd come across a way out. I could only dream that they'd escaped and now those two were looking for us.

I doubt that, though.

If Riku was looking for me, he'd have found me already. He's always been better at 'Hide and Go Seek,' plucking me out wherever I would abscond to. Heck, he was able to find me within days of being separated when our home was swallowed by darkness. He was the one who was able to find Kairi. My 'success' in finding her was only thanks to him.

Frowning, my thoughts dismal and dark, I sigh and close my eyes.

I had to stop focusing on the objects of our quest. I could feel the darkness of despair seeping into every fiber of my being.

Instead I had to focus for at least a few moments on something that would bring me joy.

My friends at my side.

Kairi in the heavens.

My home, one of billions of points up in the sky, shining down upon us as we looked up at them for guidance.

"So, which one's Destiny Islands?"

-end-