*I should be doing my homework right now but this is more fun.... I feel like provoking many Harry Potter Freaks so here I go....*

It was a black and white movie...Harry Potter and his buddies, Monie and Ron, were walking along on the Hogwarts grounds.

Harry: (mouths moves but no sound) (caption:) I can't wait to play Quidditch today.

Ron: (m.m.b.n.s) (caption:) Yeah, It'd be great to watch you play.

Monie: I figured out how to majic (spelt that way on purpose) my voice back in here.

Harry: (m.m.b.n.s.) (caption:) How?

Ron: (m.m.b.n.s.) (caption:) Yeah, Monie, share the wealth!

Monie: Why don't you look in a book and find out!

Ron: (m.m.b.n.s.) (Caption:) Spoil sport!

(Monie disappers from view all of the sudden)

R: (mmbns) (c:) Gasp, where is Monie?

H: (mmbns) (c:) LOOK!

(Smoke spells out a message)

H: (mmbns) (c:) "I have Monie, give me all your majic or she will die. I have the power to kill her you know!" Wah! It must be Morti!

R: (mmbns) (c:) Where could he have gone? And why take Monie?

H: (mmbns) (c:) Because he's just plain evil!

R: (mmbns) (c:) I don't know...could you have a secret unrequited love for her that Morti knows about?

H: (mmbns) (c:) If that's why he took her, he should have given the ransom note to that death eater russian.

R: (mmbns) (c:) You mean...

H: (mmbns) (c:) Don't say his name! Treat is as.... Voldemort's!

(ron shivers)

H: (mmbns) (c:) I bet we can find her tied up to train tracks?

R: (mmbns) (c:) How'd you know?

H: (mmbns) (c:) Formula for kidnapping movies, black and white ones w/o sound.

R: (mmbns) (c:) Let me guess, the Dursley's only let you watch those movies?

H: (mmbns) (c:) Let's not talk about it.

(at the train tracks)

M: Why did you take me?

V: Must I explain?

M: Gasp, you know how to break the jinx on the sound?

V: I'm not harry you know!

M: What are you going to do to me? (cringers in the thought of the horror he could do to her)

V: Make you Kiss Harry!

M: NOOO!!! (faints)

V: Muhahahaha! Not his girlfriend!, bs.

(r and h arrive at the tracks)

H: (mmbns) (c:) leave her alone!

V: Never!

R: (trys to zap v with wand but ends up knocking self out)

H: (mmbns) (c:) Ron! I'll get you for that!

V: I don't think so.

(a wand fight occurs, fencing style. Harry is about to lunge his "sword" into V when V disspaers and laughs)

V: I'll get you yet!

(R stirs some. H rushes over to M and picks her up, a little,... more like propping up her head.)

H: (mmbns) (c:) Monie, wake up.

(m stirs too, Ron watches from a distance)

M: (speaks airly) Oh, hi Harry.

H: (mmbns) (c:) Are you ok?

M: I think so. (flutters eye lashes)

H: (mmbns) (c:) I don't think I"m so ok.

M: why?

H: (mmbns) (c:) I feel like...(he give M a big wet one, M doesn't stuggle)

R: (gasps in distance, runs over to kick H in the arse. Give M a big wet one too. Punches H in the tummy.)

H: (mmbns) (c:) wut's that for?

M: (thinks to self, oo, I'm bing fought over by my two best guy friends, well, my only friends really.)

(h reaches for wand)

R: (mmbns) (c:) no fair! My wand doesn't work!

H: (twirls wand in air to pick up monie, levitates himself. another big wet one for m.)
(mmbns) (c:) ahhhhahahahahhah! V's plan worked and I hate iT!

R: (mmbns) (c:) me too, hahaha.



THE RETARDED END!