Just a thought on what life would be like for Bella when Edward would die.
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It's stupid really. It was fairly stupid. I was stupid.
Stupid enough to believe you'd walk out of that encounter alive.
How long has it been? Six? Ten years? Maybe longer. But not long enough to wash away all this. But I guess there's nothing to wash away. My insides were empty, therefore nothing was within. Nothing to take away.
Of course, what you did was the most predictable thing. Give your half-dead life for mine. To see me safe. It was predictable that you'd never walk out from those two doors again-what with the falling razors and the fire that slowly swallowed the building. But the thing is, I never wanted to accept it to be predictable. Maybe that's why I walked out when you told me to. No, wait. I ran.
I ran, because I was thinking to myself that you would be following soon after.
Well, this is what I deserve. This is what I deserve for being so foolish and deluded.
A new life where time doesn't seem to exist anymore. A life where nothing is fixed into place. They say the world moves in a swirl of chaotic beauty. Well…it was swirling, alright, but with anger, frustration, madness…guilt, remorse, pain, sorrow. This is exactly what I had coming for me.
It's fairly selfish, but I wish I were dead right now. I could only care so much that it would mean your death was in vain. Or maybe, I wish that I hadn't known you at all, to save me from all this emptiness.
I remember all those times you said how beautiful I was or how much you loved me. It was strange to hear those scattering memories in my head.
A breeze passed, and for a minute my dark hair billowed along with it. I thought I heard someone say hello. I turned, half-expecting you to stand there, smiling at me, ready to wrap your beautiful arms around my waist.
But then, that would be fairly stupid, too.