Daniel dropped his pack inside the door of his office and headed towards the blinking light of his answering machine.

"Help me, Daniel Jackson. You're my only hope."

"I do believe young Jack O'Neill is quoting from Star Wars."

"Thanks Teal'c," he replied, "the question is why?"

"Daniel!" The phone picked up after just two rings

"Jack."

"It's John, actually."

"Sorry. John."

"No problem. Look, thanks for getting back to me so quickly. I really need your help, buddy."

"What possible help could a linguist be to a high school student? Oh, please don't let me have answered my own question. Jack!"

"John."

"John! You've got to be kidding me."

"Oh come on! It's not like I'm asking you to do my homework or anything, I just need a few pointers."

"It's high school Spanish, or is it French?"

"It's Spanish."

"How hard can it be?"

"It isn't so much the Spanish as the Spanish plus everything else. Do you have any idea how much information these kids are suppose to absorb? Yeah, English and history are a breeze but, between physics, chemistry, and my job, I'm swamped."

"Don't you already know all that?"

"Only the everyday stuff, like, how to chart a course to Abydos! They haven't gotten to the good stuff in physics yet. I'm still screwed if I need to know how strong a naquadah generator would need to be in order to, say . . . move a planet . . . other than very."

"A naquadah generator would be insufficient to alter a planet's trajectory."

"Is that Teal'c? T, buddy! How you doin'?"

"I am well, John O'Neill."

"See, Teal'c gets my name right."

"Teal'c gets everybody's name right."

"Yeah, so?"

Daniel sighed. "What do you want?"

"World peace."

"Ja-John."

"My Spanish grade is a little low this quarter. I talked the teacher into letting me do some extra credit, but I need help from someone who actually speaks the language."

"Why are you even taking Spanish?"

"We're required to take a foreign language and since they don't offer Goa'uld, well, I speak a little Ancient-"

"Very little."

"And Ancient is close to Latin-"

"Not really."

"And Latin is the base language for Spanish, so I figured the job was half done already! Plus, I know key phrases in Spanish, like ?Donde esta el banno?; mas cervesas, porfavor; and Hasta la vista, baby!"

"Please tell me you aren't serious."

"Only a little."

"What do you have to do for extra credit?"

"Sing a song, just, ya know, in Spanish. I already tried the Dance of the Cucumber, but my teacher said it had to be a real song."

"Well, I could send you a couple different traditional songs via email-"

"No good. I can't read music."

"You can juggle and have made a hobby out of Goa'uld baiting, but you can't read music?"

"We all have our weaknesses."

"Fine, I'll be on base all day tomorrow, maybe-"

"Can't, I have work tomorrow."

"Well, I have some time on Thursday, if that works?".

"Awesome. Oh, hey, would it be cool to do it at my place?"

"You two are gonna run into each other some time." Daniel sighed.

"Thanks Danny, you're a lifesaver!"

"Would it be possible for me to accompany you?"

"Fine by me, Big Guy. You're welcome anytime. And hey, maybe we can get Danny to show us some of those culturally significant dances he's so in to."

"Keep dreaming, John."

*SG1~SG1*SG1~SG1*

Sam was in the middle of filling out her latest mission report when the phone rang, "Carter."

"You owe me fifty bucks and a case of beer."

"No way! The bet said you needed proof and a witness."

"When was the last time you checked your email?"

She sighed and started on the Chinese puzzle box that led to her email. "Son of a-!" she cried when she finally got it open. Under the heading 'Never underestimate an O'Neill' was a video of Teal'c performing the chicken dance. Her favorite part was John and Daniel shouting pointers and encouragement from the couch.

When she could breath properly, Sam sent a reply reading: 'I'm throwing in an extra case. Pay you next week' before forwarding the video to Col. Jack O'Neill. 'Thought you needed to see this, Sir.'