Title: Consequences
Author's notes: This fic is a sequel to Sincere Intentions. It would probably make sense to read that one first before starting on this one. Reviews are always appreciated, but please no flames.
Warning(s): SS/RL SLASH. Language, some possible OOC. I hate spoiler warnings so I will just say this: If you are expecting a happy fic, this one is not for you.
Summary: Can Severus and Remus hold on to their precarious relationship even with rampant emotions and self-doubt?
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoat Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
The mark on his forearm burned fiercely, and he knew further rest would be futile. Severus Snape cautiously disengaged himself from his blankets, careful not to wake the man sleeping by his side. He retreated into his living area, immediately heading towards the locked and warded cabinet in the corner.
He retrieved the potent pain potion, swallowing it down with his habitual grimace, and dropped the empty vial on the nearby table. He sighed and wearily wiped his eyes in frustration.
The effect was instant and after holding his breath for nearly a minute, the painful throbbing subsided, leaving only a bearable, though annoying itching sensation. He angrily glared at the blackened snake-like tattoo permanently embedded into his forearm. Dark magic it was.
And of course there was nothing to be done. Except die, Snape thought dryly.
He called a house elf for tea and sat in silence until she returned.
"Will master be wanting anything else?" she asked expectantly and none too silently. Snape winced at her loud squeaky voice.
"No." he said steadily. She bowed and disappeared on the spot. Severus sighed and picked up the teapot from the tray.
"Severus?"
Snape started and nearly spilt the hot tea. He pushed down his annoyance and turned towards the approaching figure.
"What are you doing out of bed?"
"What are you?" Severus retorted, then saw the concern in the other man's eyes. "The mark...I felt..." He looked back down at his tea.
Remus Lupin sat down on the sofa next to Severus. He sighed heavily and wordlessly poured himself a cup as well. They sat in familiar silence for a few moments, merely sipping their warm tea.
"You should go back to bed, Remus. There's no point in the both of us staying awake."
Remus turned to look at Severus, and smiled. "Werewolves are nocturnal."
Severus glanced at him, unamused, but said nothing in return. It was the lack of retort that had Remus worried, though he wisely said nothing as well.
Severus glanced at the mantle clock and noted that it was at least another three hours until dawn.
"Is he angry?"
"When isn't he?" replied a tired Snape, leaning back against the cushions.
Remus stayed silent, though his mind was ripe with fury. He refrained from sighing for he knew it would anger Snape. Any display of pity was not permitted, though Remus knew Snape was perpetually paranoid.
Months and months had passed and still the resistance was no further with an answer to their Voldemort problem. Muggles were murdered frequently and the Order members were drained and out of resources. All except for one.
Severus' role as the perfect spy was a precarious one and though he was privy to a great deal of the Dark Lord's plans, lately it seemed that he was barely called upon. Clearly something was going on, judging by Snape's constant pain. Voldemort did like to toy with his followers as much as his prey.
Worst of all, Severus grew more calculating and agitated. He knew the Order depended on him for information and when unable to provide assistance, they scorned him. He could care less about what people thought, but Remus knew it irked Snape to be mistrusted amongst his peers, even if he never said it. Plus, the more days that passed without a summons, the more nervous and paranoid Snape got. He never expressed it to anyone of course. But Remus knew.
Secretly, Remus was glad he wasn't summoned. Every twinge of pain had Remus biting his tongue in worry. He himself had been in Voldemort's presence. Once was more than enough.
He placed his hand on Snape's knee. Severus allowed it, which didn't startle Remus like it should have. He had so much to say but he knew Severus wouldn't appreciate any of it.
Instead, he said, "Will you return to bed?"
Snape sighed and rubbed his tired eyes once more. "No, I think I will grade some more papers," and stood right up.
Remus returned to bed, alone.
Winter break was bleak and monotonous. True to form, Severus had all his students' papers graded and ready three days before they were to return from holiday.
He was currently sitting in Dumbledore's office waiting for the older wizard to start speaking. What he heard was not what he wanted to hear.
"Remus is worried about you."
Snape scowled and made to stand.
"Severus."
Because the man knew him like no other, Snape sighed, exasperated.
"I'm not getting into this, Albus. Not now, not ever."
"I do not mean to pry. He is merely worried. You know how he gets, Severus.
Yes, he did know. He wasn't blind. No one could have missed the sideways glances the wolf had been throwing him. Ignoring them had done no good. Now he had to listen to a lecture from Dumbledore.
"Remus is an old sap; he worries for nothing."
"I worry too, my boy."
Severus cringed at the familiar but undeserved endearment.
"For Merlin's sake, Albus! I'm on holiday- am I not allowed at least one meddlesome-free day?" He did not wait for an answer, instead choosing to storm out in an annoyed huff.
Seething, he wished he could hex something. Unfortunately, all the students were away, so that put a damper on that idea.
He was angry at Remus, not for his annoying habit, but for going to Albus with it. He detested the sympathetic looks and kind words. He had bigger issues to deal with.
He knew it wouldn't take Albus long to figure out their sordid little secret. The older man hadn't said a word about it which did not really surprise Severus. However, Albus did seem awfully chipper whenever they were all in the same room together. Quite annoying.
He arrived back in his room, fully intending to berate Remus' foolishness. Instead, he stood silent as he witnessed the werewolf packing his items into his sack.
"What are you doing?" he asked, then mentally slapped his momentary stupidity.
Remus didn't look up from his packing. "What does it look like?" Severus was immediately on guard.
"Term does not begin for three more days." He hoped that didn't sound too…critical.
He saw Remus shrug. "I assumed you would want some time to yourself before classes resumed.
Severus knew when people were lying to him. And with Remus it was just too easy. He approached the other figure, hesitantly laying a hand on his shoulder.
"What is it?" he quietly asked, wanting the other man to look at him. Remus finished tying his pack before turning around. His eyes were guarded, but Snape wouldn't intrude on his thoughts. He knew Remus would never forgive him for the breech.
"I'm giving you some space, Severus. I will be at Headquarters if you need me." He picked up the pack and flung it over his shoulder.
Severus frowned, not knowing what to say. Agitation filled his being and suddenly, he wished for Remus to leave. He brusquely stepped aside and masked his face.
"Do what you want, Lupin. I don't require a nurse-maid."
He knew he had wounded Remus judging by his sudden stiff posture, yet he couldn't bring himself to take it back. He was still irritated about his earlier conversation with Dumbledore.
Remus donned his shabby, warm cloak and cap and merely nodded in Snape's direction before leaving the room.
Snape let out a breath he didn't even realize he was holding, before raking a hand through his long hair.
He quietly went to his desk, pulling out a quill and parchment, and began composing next week's schedule. After hours of sitting, he glanced at the mantle clock and went to bed. He looked down at the empty bed as he undressed, wondering why he felt off. He lay awake until morning.