Stoics on sale
Kickers-ej
Disclaimer: WHY? WHY?!!! WHY IS NARUTO NOT MINE!!!!!????!
I dedicate this to all the reviewers of role reverse.
No 1 : The Plan
Tsunade paced back and forth, she needed a plan quick. Apparently, using the village's tax money to bet on which kage to die first was NOT a good idea. The hidden village of leaf is now near bankruptcy, with very little back-up.
"Tsunade-baa-chan! I'm bored! I wanna go after Sasuke!" Naruto whined from the little spacing between the doors. Tsunade growled, now was a very critical time for Konoha, and hearing Naruto whine will not help in any way. She twirled and was about to snap at the disrespectful gaki, when her eyes caught a package wrapped neatly, tucked safe under Naruto's left arm.
"What is that?"
"This? Hmm, it's a gift that some random fangirl gave me in case I meet Sasuke,"
Fangirl?
"You should have seen the bastard's front porch! I mean THAT is a lot of admirers,"
Admirers?
"They sure don't mind spending money on him, even if he's a bastard,"
Money?
"Heck, I think some of them would kill just to spend time with him,"
Spend time?
"It's because he's so mysterious and quiet, so girls dig him," Naruto finished blabbering, and turned to see Tsunade spacing out. The hokage smirked.
Boys + fans + spend time money!
"Naruto, forget Uchiha Sasuke,"Tsunade ordered. Naruto seethed at that.
"There is no way I'm gonna forget him! I'm going to find him and .."
"I want you to call these people, a mission is on their way," She scribbled on a scroll and passed it to Naruto, who peeked at the list and scowled.
"These are a weird combination baa-chan," complained the ever pouty dobe.
"Not for this mission,"
The three people looked at each other warily, figuring that this was gonna be one heck of a weirdo mission if all three of them are needed. The door swung open and Tsunade strode in with Shizune in tow.
The other inhabitants of the room tensed, they were gonna find out about the mission in this briefing, hopefully it will shed some light to these choice of ninjas.
"The reason you are all here is to serve Konoha, as you have stated in your pledge when you became ninjas," Tsunade began.
"I don't even live here," stated the irritated one, his eyes closing into slits.
"But you owe me for that time I helped in when you buried Kankurou in sand," Tsunade rebutted.
Gaara sank back into his seat. Just great! He was summoned from sand to repay a debt!
"This mission may even be the most dangerous mission yet, far greater that Akatsuki or Orochimaru," Tsunade continued on, eyeing the ninjas.
"You may loose something far greater than your life," at this, the others gasped. Greater than life?
"So I have deemed it fit that the five of you is chosen, as you are the most likely candidates,"
"Hokage-sama, there are only three of us here," the perceptive one remarked.
"Others will join us, in just a minute," The hokage grinned.
Neji shook in silent terror at the Hokage's grin. There was something there, something sinister, evil even. He looked at the silent one, their gaze met and an approval was shared. He can't defy their Hokage right?
Shino decided that shutting up is the best for now. He himself was clueless to the type of mission he would soon embark with Neji and Gaara. But even so, he could not help but to anticipate the event.
A scuffle can be heard from outside, and all eyes darted to the door. A figure stumbled in, limbs in a heap. When he stood, he dusted himself and found the rest of the company, save Tsunade, gawking at his presence. Neji, Gaara and Shino watched with apprehension as the stranger walked and sat in one of the chairs.
"It is foolish of you, Tsunade-sama. If you think I will listen to you...," the newcomer said in an even tone, only to be halted by Tsunade.
"I'll make it worth your while, for I know what you are really after. Do this mission for me and I will grant you the thing you want most,"The unnerving grin was back, and the newbie couldn't help but wonder if his secret was really known.
"For your mission..," everyone held their breaths.
"You are now officially on sale," Tsunade stated in a cheery way.
OO!!!!
"This is insane!"
"No way in hell am I gonna be sold, woman!"
"..."
"Huh, as if witch," at that Tsunade twitched and beckoned for the new one for a one on one. When they were far enough, she whipped a couple of pictures and the young man pitched back, nose streaming with blood. Tsunade then showed the pictures to the others, who also pitched back with bloody noses.
"That is what you are after??!!" Gaara blocked his bloody nose and pointed his finger to the newcomer.
"..." Shino just couldn't find the right words to say.
"I never knew, that you would stoop this low," Neji bowed his head in shame. He couldn't believe his eyes, and in the meantime, he wished that Tsunade would share the pictures.
"That's incest you know," Gaara shot back.
Itachi took all the comments without a faze. He was not into incest. It's just that collecting pictures of your hot brother naked makes a mean photo album! Even the guys back at Akatsuki thought it was cool.
"I have my reasons,"Itachi answered back. Tsunade did a victory dance and ushered the rest to sit down. She was gonna explain it to them. For a moment she went stiff, only to grin and face her audience.
"Now listen up, from now on, you will be sold for merchandising purposes ; which technically means that you will be modeling. And also, for most of the time, I will put you guys up for sale," dramatic pause "..to the fangirls,"
Another outbreak ensued. Gaara was trying to leap out of Neji's hold to hit the Hokage. Itachi merely stated that it was gross to go out with girls and Shino looked aghast.
"This will go at an hourly basis, and I will charge you guys according to the demand. This way we can upgrade Konoha's wealth in no time," proudly Tsunade scribbled her ideas down and signed, sealing the scroll. She handed it to Shizune who immediatle took it for further processing.
The others was about to retort when she gave a final blow to seal the deal.
"You owe me," Gaara bit his lip.
"You are entitled to follow orders, and so are you," Neji and Shino nodded glumly.
"And you, just think, with all the work you guys are doing, you will have plenty of time to snap pictures of Sasuke naked," Itachi merely shrugged.
"You also said that there was another one coming," Neji cut in.
"If you are too old to remember, Sasuke left the village a long time ago," Itachi stated and began to make his way out.
"On the contrary, he just came back," Tsunade said. The rest faulted, Itachi quickly turned his gaze to look incredulously at the Hokage.
"Are you not, Sasuke?" From her place, she shifted her eyes to the nearby window, where surely enough, a figure perched elegantly on the window sill. His ebony eyes sparkled with amusement, his raven locks swayed in time with the passing winds.
Itachi's jaw-dropped, and quickly took out his digital camera to snap a picture. That pose was sooooo sexy! Score one for his album!
Sasuke stood up and smirked. He then nodded at the Hokage, as an indication that he accepts the mission.
"I'm home,"
Dun Dun Dun! I always wondered why Tsunade never sell her ninjas to make money. I mean, come on! The village is practically crawling with hot guys! Ooh...maybe Akatsuki should do this as well...drool