Okay, so I thought I was done with the Walking Dead, like permanently done after I finished some requests I'm behind on but holy shit, that season finale.. Holy shit. It inspired this. I HAD to write it. I swear, I'd went insane if I didn't. XD So here it is, my take on the whole Carl almost getting raped. o_o Oh poor Carl.. I felt so bad for him but oh, the way Rick went all barbaric to save him... OH MY GOD! -Fans self- okay, okay, I think I'm done... XD
-Ahem- This is a Rick/Carl story. It doesn't have sex in it but it's like a little fluff fanfiction. But it's still incest and although hardcore, some might not like the thought of father and son being affectionate to each other, thus if you don't, get outta here. Don't wanna hear your flames.
Anyway, if you do, enjoy my lovely readers! And if you want, I'd love to hear your thoughts on the finale as well! :3 I'm all hyped up after that...
Carl's hesitant, cautious, and afraid. That's something Rick doesn't know... It's something Carl hides and does so well. He acts tough, acts like nothing bothers him in this world and acts as if he can handle whatever is to come at him and while that was true, he's realized there are some things in this world that he simply cannot comprehend and cannot rationalize to but just another part of this world, to be a normal thing in life now like the walkers.
He realized this, the very moment that man had him in his grasps, then pinned to the ground and Carl's never been so terrified in his life. There were sick people in this world, Rick knew that, Daryl knew it but Carl hadn't known about such things in the past. He does now and what trace of innocence he might have had left was stripped away last night.
It didn't happen, but Carl could feel it and the fear that came along with the way that man had touched him and what he whispered in his ear. It still bothered him, still had him jumpy even though it's been a day after and nothing had actually happened to him, well physically happened to him aside from getting a little beat up.
The fact that Rick went all barbaric on the leader and the man that held him was nothing in comparison to the way he felt in that man's grasp... The way it had him feeling scared of his own father even. He didn't trust after that and when Rick was finished talking to Daryl and came to check up on him, he hadn't spoken to the man and jumped under his touch. All he could think about was last night and all he felt as if now he had to watch everyone around him - even the man that's raised him for nearly fifteen long years now.
He doesn't even trust Michonne, although she's a female and she was the one holding him and comforting him for hours after. She reads him better than Rick though, and that's the only reason he trusted her enough to do such a thing.
However, Rick's not that dense to where he doesn't catch on to what's happening eventually. He's figured it out, and he's ready to step up and be parent he should've been from the start of this but it's too late to look back on that and regret it now.
It's close to the evening hours now, and the sun's setting. They've already set up camp for the night. Daryl's sitting off too himself a little ways from them. He volunteered to keep watch tonight, to lower the chances of any more surprises.
Michonne's lying close to the fire and Rick's hopeful that she's asleep although he knows she probably isn't. Sleep's not an easy thing to come by these days...
Regardless, Rick gets up from where he sits and moves to where Carl's at. The boy's looking idly into the fire and Rick knows he's not over the incident that occurred.
Rick sat beside the boy, and Carl spared him only a glance. Rick cleared his throat, as he thought of what to say next to his son. He wasn't use to this, to trying to comfort someone - especially his teenage boy who as of lately wanted little to do with him. And it's not like he could say the things exchanged between he and Daryl. "It's not your fault", no. Carl definitely knew that much and that would've been a sorry excuse for comfort...
"I'm sorry." Rick finally said, keeping his voice low. He didn't exactly want Michonne or Daryl to overhear the conversation. "I'm sorry that I couldn't be there sooner..." And it was the truth. Although Rick fought like hell before finally ripping the leader's throat out like some wild animal or a walker for that matter, he still felt he should've been there sooner to rescue Carl.
"It's fine."Carl simply replied with a toneless voice.
"No, it's not." Rick wasn't going to settle for that, not this time. "If I'd gotten to you sooner, you wouldn't have gone through that."
Protecting Carl, that was his job, his mission. It was before things ended up like this. But he feels he's failed, time and time again and that's just one more thing to make him feel disappointed in himself, and angry every time he thought about that man and the things he was so close to doing to Carl and that's a thought that's ran through Rick's mind for the entire day now. He's well aware his over protectiveness is natural. Carl is his son, his baby and no one fucks with him... But, there's also this part of Rick that he knows isn't normal. The side that would just be absolutely furious with anyone that had the boy first.
Rick does feel Carl belongs to him, and nobody else. It's wrong, Rick's already concluded that but he can't change it. He just has to accept it and indulge in the little moments with Carl. Little moments the he feels has been stripped away from him now though because Carl's afraid.
"It's just life and survival now. It's fine." Carl stated, refusing to look at Rick.
Rick leaned in closer to Carl, now able to see the boy's face of which shades of yellow and orange from the fire danced about and if it wasn't for the tears starting to spill, Rick would've found such a sight beautiful.
"Oh, Carl..." Rick frowned, feeling his heart break as he reached over to pull Carl into a side hug. "It's alright now son... I promise, you're safe." He expected Carl to pull away, close up and not say anything. He did not expect the reaction Carl actually gave though.
The boy did pull away from Rick's hug, only to move closer in front of Rick, taking a seat in the man's lap and nuzzled into Rick's chest.
Rick was stunned at first at this new behavior, however he soon got over his shock and wrapped both arms around Carl, holding him close.
"I tried..." Carl mumbled into Rick's shirt. "I tried to be a better son, a better fighter, stronger... But..." He trailed off, sobbing silently.
Rick remained quiet, however he brought a hand up to gently caress the boy's hair.
"But I'm still weak..." Carl finished and Rick could feel the boy shaking harder, trying to fight off his overwhelming emotions.
"Ssh..." Rick cooed, bringing Carl closer against him if that was possible. "You've grown, in ways that you can't see. That ambush didn't mean a damn thing, we all were helpless at first, until we were driven to find strength we didn't know we had."
"Yeah... But I couldn't do anything... You had to save me... I couldn't protect myself..." Carl muttered, pulling away from the embrace slightly, to stare down at the ground.
"Having someone save you doesn't make you weak... We all need help, at one point or another... There was nothing you could do, but there's no reason to feel bad about that." Said Rick.
Carl sighed, wiping his eyes. "Thanks dad... For lookin' out for me... I know I ain't been the best of kids but-"
"Carl, I couldn't have asked for a better son..." Rick paused, leaning down to kiss the boy upon his head. It wasn't much, not what Rick wanted. He wanted to kiss the boy on his lips, touch him in ways no father should touch their son but this would be enough. He wouldn't push it any further for Carl's sake and he'd settle for just this because it was good enough.
Carl said nothing, leaning back into Rick. He didn't know what to say, to be honest and he felt that nothing really had to be said. Just being in Rick's embrace, with the man stroking his hair was enough to calm his fears and doubts and for the first time, he truly felt he did need Rick, for more reasons than just to survive.
He's still damaged though, emotional scars like that don't go away easily and some not at all. He'll always remember last night, and be weary of strangers but, with Rick it'll slowly get easier to deal with. Being here in Rick's arms gives him a sense of safety and he feels like he's untouchable and Carl wouldn't mind it at all if they did this every night because in this fucked up world, Rick's the only thing he has that he knows now he can be certain of.
Carl realizes in this moment that he needs Rick, he wants him in his life and he loves him because although Rick hasn't been the perfect father, he's always there to pick up the broken pieces when Carl shatters and he's the savior every time Carl can't save himself and that's what matters most.
Reviews are greatly appreciated and loved!