A Special Bond

Rose sat in the corner of the Tardis, watching the Doctor, or, to be more accurate, the Doctors. The meta-crisis Doctor was standing with Donna, and they were smiling at each other. The first Doctor, the proper Doctor, her Doctor, was circling the console, making sure the other pilots were doing their jobs. Then her gaze rested on Martha, and jealousy bit into her. Martha was pretty, she had to admit it; and the way she looked at the Doctor, Rose could tell that she though he was wonderful. It's not fair! she thought. I was here first. Then she felt someone sit beside her and looked up to see Sarah Jane.

"I know how you felt, now," Rose said. "Back when we first met, and you were trying to impress the Doctor."

Sarah Jane smiled, a bit sadly. "I didn't understand it then, why he would go and leave me and find other companions. I suppose it's because ... well, when you're with him he makes you feel as if you were the most important person in the world. Oh, I know he condescends and makes you feel as if you don't know anything. At least at first. But he shows you things that so few people have seen, and you learn so much, and I thought I must be special because I was the one he showed them to."

"Yeah," said Rose. "But with him and me, it was different, yeah? We were in love ... are in love. So why would he go off and do this to me? Look at Donna. Look at Martha. They're prettier than me. Is that it? Is that why?"

"Of course not. But you must look at it from his perspective. Understand that he is so much older than he looks; sometimes you can see it in his eyes. Am I right?"

Rose nodded.

"And now, especially, that his own people are gone, he is very lonely. But he's always been lonely; he was exiled by the Time Lords, and they used him to get what they wanted so many times, and many of his own friends betrayed him. He's always turned to his companions, people like you and me, for friendship and understanding. Even I wasn't the first companion he he had, you know." She smiled up into Rose's astonished face. "He's been picking up people and traveling with them since the 1960s. His first companion was his granddaughter, Susan. Some of them stay on for a long time, others leave quickly, but he is never long without them."

"But..." Rose was nearly in tears. "We have something special. I know we do! The way he looks at me. I know he would say he loved me if ... if we just had a moment alone."

"Of course you have something special. But all of us have had a different relationship with the Doctor. Friendships are always different, love is always different. Look at Donna and Martha. You can see it even in them: Donna is like a sister to him, Martha is ... "

"Almost aloof," finished Rose. "But she loves him too."

"Exactly. So think about how she is feeling, because he most likely never was in love with her, and never will be. To him she's just a friend, a wonderful friend, a brilliant one, but just a friend. But I can tell you that even there, he feels a special bond to her that he'll never feel for anyone else. You and I and everyone, we just pass through. Like actors on a stage; when our part is over, we leave the stage and others take our places."

"But he seems to be happy without me."

"Do you want him to always be pining after someone he can never have? You were trapped in another world, and as far as he knew you always would be. So he did what he's always done when he has lost a companion: he mourned, and then he traveled, and then he found another friend. Do you grudge him that?"

"No," sighed Rose. "I suppose not."

"I know it's hard to get used to." Sarah Jane put her arm around Rose's shoulder. "When I saw you, walking around with him, it stung. But he explained to me how it is for him: we have such short lives, and he goes on living. He often would rather leave us when we are happy, healthy, and alive, than watch friend after friend live out their life, grow old and die, right before his eyes. Can you imagine that? And usually, when one of his companions die, he blames himself. So don't be too hard on him."

Rose took a deep breath and stood up. "Well, he does love me. And I'll stay with him until I die; this time I will."

Sarah Jane shook her head but did not reply. And the Tardis stopped on Bad Wolf Bay.

AN: Written because, while I liked Rose pretty well in the first two seasons, I was ready to see her go and I think she was just plain annoying in Turn Left/The Stolen Earth/Journey's End. So I decided to let Sarah Jane set her straight :)