Image of You
"Mommy!" a seven year old girl with short, raven black hair called, pointing at a photo. "Who is this man? And why does he have that funny looking mask? Is he going to a Halloween party?"
Quietly laughing, Rei Hino pulled the photo album from the little girl's hands and propped it on her lap. The little girl jumped on the sofa and sat next to her mother to look at the picture in question. There were seven people in the photo: five young ladies, a pink haired girl, and the man in a tuxedo her daughter was pointing at.
"I saw him first," Rei sighed.
"Huh?" the confused daughter replied. But her mother no longer heard her. Rei already had a far away look in her eyes, taking her back to her teen years. Has it been so long?
o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o
I remember stumbling on a stupid rock before meeting him. It was embarrassing. But I can literally say that I fell head over heels in love with him at that moment. Unfortunately, he just didn't notice me. Despite the plan I had in mind of him asking me out for a drink, I ended up asking him instead. Still, it was the first date I ever had with him. I'm not sure if he remembers. But I did.
Back then, he probably judged me as this black haired school girl making a fool of herself, who didn't know anything else except go out on dates, visit some kind of doll exhibit that he was not really fond of. It didn't matter to me then. He still had a lot of things to know about me before he could judge me.
Eventually, we went out on dates more often, practically my doing. He never turned me down but didn't ask me out anyway. Still, he didn't strike me as one of those jerks like Jadeite who cannot see women as worth respecting. My guy was the catch of a lifetime. And he was respectful enough to not look at other women besides me. Of course, I didn't consider it that way. I decided that he also liked me.
I got him to know more about me although he might have not seen me the way I wanted him to. I wanted him to know Rei Hino as a devoted priestess, a wonderful leader to her class, a determined singer, and a wonderful person beyond the snob that some people think I am. Of course, I also secretly wanted him to know my other and perhaps my true identity—a fighter who's dedicated to protecting people from bad elements—but I knew it was crossing the line… at least until we discovered his other identity.
o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o
"Mom-meee!" called the little girl, startling her mother. She had been tugging Rei's sleeve, repeating her question, "Who is he?"
"This, my little princess, is King Endymion when he was young." Rei glanced at the photo again. Her hand traced the outlined features of the masked man's face before continuing. "Back then, he was known as Tuxedo Mask and Mamoru Chiba. He protected us five soldiers whenever we got into trouble."
"Ooh!" the daughter squealed. "A knight."
"Yes, Riko. You can say that."
Hearing this, Riko jumped down from the sofa and started acting out the fairy tale her mother had read to her one night. She acted out both damsel in distress and knight, using a broom as both the horse and sword.
o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o
Back then I didn't know that he was the same mysterious guy Usagi and I had been drooling over. Although I had my suspicions, even voicing it out to Usagi, I didn't really expect him to be both Mamoru Chiba and Tuxedo Mask, much less to be Usagi's past and future lover. Who would have thought that such a cry baby would get such a catch? And what? What was I supposed to do? Back down? Back down just because in the distant past the two of them were the royal couple and I was in the sidelines? Back down just because they were also meant to be together in the future? Screw fate! I had him first. I had the Mamoru Chiba first even before Usagi Tsukino had the chance to get close to Tuxedo Mask. I even let her have the masked man. I focused on the real person. It was such a bad luck that both identities are one and the same.
But I had thought about it—backing down. I guess nobody beats destiny. If I had been Sailor Mars even before my identity as Rei Hino was born, then anything is possible with fate. But I was not the kind of sailor soldier who gives up without a fight. I tried. I sure as hell tried. I spent most of my nights back then just formulating ways on how I could get him back to me somehow. I tried to best fate.
I tried being subtle. Those times that we held meetings at our shrine, I did that just so I can control the situation and have a chance to be with him alone again… alone where no one, not even him, could have suspected. I wanted him to notice me again, bit by bit. I didn't want to be so shameful as to throw myself right at him, unlike some pigtailed blonde I know. I will win him back, I had told myself a couple of thousand times. He'll be mine again.
I charmed him. I had the best legs of all five of us and the most well toned body. I had straight and shiny, jet-black hair; keen, purple eyes; delicate shoulders; perky breasts; narrow waist; shapely hips; long legs; and other parts of the anatomy I was so proud of.
Despite the fact that we all wore the same battle suits, the variations done in each of our suits gave me the best compliment. As Sailor Mars, my signature color was red: the color of love, lust, and fiery passion. On each of our battles, I made sure to give him the best view. I was always the first one to sense him there before he even came to our rescue. Ever since I learned his true identity, I managed to tune in all my psychic powers to his energy so that I'll always know where he was. Of course, he didn't know that I knew his position every time. But judging from the way the front of his pants bulged every time I happened to stumble in a sexy position to a tree or bush or building he was currently hiding in, he must have enjoyed the show.
o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o
Rei watched her daughter end her little play. Riko is a gem, she thought. I wouldn't give her for the world.
"My hero," Riko sighed, twirling around the living room before throwing herself at her imaginary knight. "Take me to your palace and we shall live happily ever after."
o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o
Happily ever after… I wonder if there's such a thing. Things never get happy all the way. I believed in it once. I thought the idea was real, that it was possible. It almost happened to me… almost.
It was at that time after we defeated Queen Beryl. All of us got a chance to live a second life... revived but temporarily forgetting our other lives. But Mamoru had completely forgotten his. At least that was what we thought.
We were all sad for Usagi, but I secretly rejoiced. I didn't care much at the time and thought destiny changed the way things should have been and finally gave me a shot. And in any case, Usagi drooled over this new knight that appeared—Knight of the Moonlight. She's just like that, easy to fall in love with so many others. I, on the other hand, stick to just one. I hoped he'd see that.
I finally got a fresh start. And goodness, I was so glad that I didn't trip in front of him all over again. Apparently, he didn't like school girls getting all weird with crazy stories of a past life and future destiny. He also didn't like other school girls suddenly announcing that he's theirs alone. He was back to his old self. I wasn't any of those girls and this time he noticed me in that special way.
We started dating again. Of course, I didn't let the other girls find out. Somehow, he followed my lead and we were going out to places where we knew the girls wouldn't discover us. When in front of the girls, we'd pretend that we didn't know each other. When with Usagi, I half-heartedly encouraged her on dealing with Mamoru. And every time she caught us together, we would pretend that I was trying to talk him into listening to Usagi's story.
Sometimes I felt guilty. But most of the time I knew I deserved it. I had him first.
It was intense… loving him. I was right in believing he had a lot to give. He loves deep. He gives it all when he loves a woman. I was in heaven every time I was with him. My whole world revolved around him. The rest can just wait.
But it was short-lived. Once the girls and I defeated the alien twins who to me by the way acted like incestuous lovers, Mamoru also got his memory back. Right then and there, it was as if he had forgotten everything that happened between us. When we were all together celebrating, I caught his eye. He had smiled at me… but it was not the same smile he had given me the last time we were together. There was curiosity behind his glance but I knew it was only a trace of memory that may never rise again. All those times we spent together, the wonderful feeling of being held in his arms, the warmth of his lips on mine, of just being there with him—all those things flew away like dust in the wind. It hurt.
I think… at some point… I actually told him my true feelings… a second time… even after he had already forgotten. I just don't remember exactly when. But judging from how things are now, I guess it didn't work out. I must have worded my confession wrong. Perhaps I didn't give it enough emotion. Maybe I swallowed most of my words because I was so nervous. Or maybe the person that I appealed to was no longer there but swallowed back in a distant land. I'm not sure what I did or what happened. Maybe I only dreamt confessing my love to him and just forgot to remember how he must have reacted.
The love we both had together crumbled. I gave him my heart, he gave his to me. But in the end, fate got the best of me. Fate took his heart from me and left me with a gaping hole in my chest. I cried. So many times in the night I cried as my heart bled out in sorrow.
I longed for him. No amount of treasure in the world could have made me love him any less. But he was gone. And I had to endure every single day seeing him with her, seeing her in the arms that once held me with so much passion. It hurt. It hurt like hell.
o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - o
Rei looked up, snapped out of her daydream, as she heard her daughter playing several keys on their grand piano. Lightly brushing away the tear that formed in her eye, she placed the photo album down on the coffee table and looked at the walls surrounding her. They were also covered with pictures of the five sailor soldiers and the other soldiers of the outer planets. None of the portraits on the walls, however, showed the King. Maybe that's why her daughter didn't know his existence until she saw his picture in the album.
Rei walked to stand beside her daughter. She knew the melody her daughter was playing. It was one of Rei's compositions when she was in high school. It was her best song and also the one that made her into a pop idol years later. The critics and her fans commented on how powerful the song was. It should, Rei thought to herself, I poured my heart and soul into that one song. It was the only song she secretly dedicated to him.
Riko glanced at her mother and smiled. Her fingers danced on the keys, finally steering it to the first verse of the song. Mother and daughter both sang beautifully.
Rei smiled once more. Riko had her voice. She also inherited her hair and physical features. Rei knew that her daughter would carry out her own position as Sailor Mars. Again, she smiled at her daughter once more. You've got spunk Riko, she thought before singing along with the chorus. And you really do have his eyes…
"Fire soul bird in love, fire soul bird in love. Ashita wo motomete! I love passion."