Title: No Need to Hide
Pairing: LeonxCloud
Written by: Meru Caldera
Yes. I own them. Oh, Look at that! A rainbow pig just flew by! Let me just hop on my winged Unicorn and chase after him. Then we can have tea with Lady Honeyworth in Ice Cream Valley.
...seriously though. I don't own the characters. So don't sue.
I apologize for any grammar errors I made.
Please enjoy.
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Leon drew away from the passionate kiss him and Cloud were sharing. "I love you, Cloud." He said, His voice husky with lust and emotion. Both of them were on the bed they shared. Leon laying on top of the younger man.
Cloud did something he only did when Leon was around. He smiled. "I love you too, Squall."
Leon frowned. He sat up, straddling Cloud's waist. He looked down at the blond with a stern look on his face. "We've already had this discussion. My name is Leon. There for, I want everyone to call me Leon. That doesn't exclude you, Cloud."
"You know I would usually respect your wishes, but I just can't when it comes to this. You're using this name thing to hide a part of yourself away."
"I'm not hiding. I'm at peace with my past."
"I know you're at peace with your past, but there's still something that you're hiding from. Please, I don't expect you to let everyone call you by your real name." Cloud took Leon's hand in his own. " Please, at least trust me enough to."
"Why do you have to make such a big deal out of something as simple as calling me Leon?" He pulled his hand away from Cloud's and got off of the blond. This wasn't their first fight about his name.
Cloud sat up and looked into Leon's eyes. "Both of us have opened up to each other more then any other person. I've completely bared my soul to you, Leon. Yet you still hide a part of yourself from me."
"That's so fucking ridiculous Cloud and you know it.." He reached behind Cloud and grabbed his pillow. "I'm not hiding anything." He took one of the blankets off their bed as he stood up and made his way to the bedroom door.
"Are you afraid I would love you less, if I knew all of you?
Leon never stopped walking. He gave no sign that he had even acknowledged Cloud's question. He opened the door to their room and walked out, slamming it shut behind himself.
"Squall..." Cloud whispered softly, to the now empty room. He hadn't meant to start a fight with the brunet. He only wanted to help Leon. Like Leon had helped him.
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It had been at least an hour since their fight and Leon still couldn't sleep. He was usually able to sleep just fine on the couch. He rolled over onto his stomach and laid his head on the pillow, facing the back of the couch.
He thought it was odd, when he heard a door open upstairs. Cloud usually let him cool off for the night. I guess he's not going to let this go. Well, too bad. I don't want to talk about it anymore right now.
He tried to slow his breathing as he heard footsteps coming down the stars. The footsteps continued across the living room and stopped when they got to the side of the couch.
"Leon?" His name was spoken so softly, that he had almost missed it. He could hear Cloud as he sat down on the floor in front of the couch. It seemed pretending to be asleep was working. I hope he doesn't try to wake me up. Just go away Cloud. I don't want to talk right now.
Leon felt pressure on his side. He realized it was Cloud resting his head against the couch and just below his ribs.
"I'm sorry, Leon." The words were spoken in the same soft voice as before. Only this time slightly muffled. "I was thinking about, how things were before. When we first met. We were both emotional messes. The fact that neither of us wanted to share our pain with someone, had only made it worse. I think after a while, we both realized that our pain was similar. We started to trust each other on the battle field. That opened up the way to trusting each other on an emotional level. We started sharing vague bits of our pasts. Until finally, we were sharing our life stories. I think it was on that trust, that our romantic relationship was built." The fondness of those memories in Cloud's voice was unmistakable.
"Yuffie once told me, That before we got to each other. We were both joyless bores. I think that's one of the most insightful things she's ever managed to say."Cloud continued, laughter in his voice. Leon couldn't help, but smile at that. Him and Cloud could always make each other smile or laugh by making fun of Yuffie. Just like Yuffie could always make herself laugh, by making fun of...everyone.
"I shouldn't have pushed you to share everything you are with me. That was wrong. I should have just been grateful that you opened up to me at all." All humor had left Cloud's voice. It was now thick with sadness and remorse.
Wait, that doesn't sound right. Cloud shouldn't feel like that's all he should expect from me. Cloud was brave enough to completely bare his soul to me. Why am I hiding from someone who trusts me so much? Leon squeezed his eyes shut. I'm sick of hiding. I don't want to anymore. At least not from him.
Leon turned over and quickly sat up. He reached over and switched on the lamp that sat on the end table. He let his eyes adjust for a few seconds, then looked down at Cloud. He didn't seem to be shocked. "Did you know I was awake?"
Cloud nodded.
That made Leon feel worse. Cloud hadn't been apologizing on what he thought were deaf ears to only make himself feel better. He had apologized knowing his words were being heard.
"I'm sorry, Cloud." Leon frowned.
Cloud moved to sit on the couch beside Leon. "There's no reason for you to be sorry."
"Yes, there is." He turned his body, so he could better face Cloud. "All those times I tried to push you away, I was hurting you."
Cloud took a deep breath. "Leon, It's not reasonable to expect someone to trust you with their all. I realize that now."
"All you wanted was to call me by my real name. I kept pushing you away, Because for a long time. I felt like my real name represented a part of me I never shared with anyone. A weak part, I never wanted to be like again." He took Cloud's hand and held it in his own. "Your help has made me realize, That'll I'll never end up like that again. Cloud. I want to trust you with all that I am."
A smile slowly spread across Cloud's lips. He moved to sit on Leon's lap and wrapped his arms around the brunet's neck. "I'm ready to know all of you."
Leon wrapped his arms around Cloud's waist and stared deeply into the blond's eyes. He felt a smile of his own spread across his lips. "Okay. You'll be the first person to ever know the lonely little boy in the orphanage."
Cloud's eyes shone with great happiness. "I'm sure he'll get along great with the lonely little boy, hated by all the towns people."
Leon grinned and pulled Cloud tighter against his body. "I love you, Cloud."
Cloud wrapped his arms around Leon and laid his head on the brunet's shoulder. "I love you too, Squall."
END
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I tried to keep a sense that Cloud was really the only one Leon would let call him by his real name, by never using it outside of dialogue
Also, I'd like to thank my best friend Ra-chan for reading the first part of the Fic and telling me she liked it.
I should also give thanks to Matt Groening. Every time I felt like I didn't know what to write. I took a break by reading a few Life in Hell comics from my Huge Book of Hell. It really helped clear my head.
I've went through a long period of thinking anything I write is pure shit. This is the first Fic I've ever seen worth to finish. So please review. Even if you can only think of one word to say. Trust me, I won't mind. Sometimes that's all I can come up with too.
