One day, Zack was walking down the Bailey when suddenly a paper landed on his face.

"Woah! Who turned out the lights?" he picked out the paper and checked it out. "What's this? It looks like some kind of... uh-huh... yes... ok... wow... this is cool... JENOVA's head... yes... awesome! Whoever thought this up is genius!" He ran excitedly to the bar. He wanted to try this.

.:::::::::.

"You have to be related! I mean the hair and the eyes!" Axel flapped his arms out, trying to emphasize his point to his audience.

Roxas stared at him weirdly. "I don't even know him my whole life."

Cloud nodded in agreement. "Yes. Take you and Reno for example."

"… Who's Reno?"

"He--" Cloud was cut from his reply as the door burst open. Roxas took another sip on his shake. He had this vibe he won't be finishing his drink. Zack entered the scene with a stupid grin on his face.

The younger blonde groaned. "Tell me this isn't like one of Axel's stupid ideas."

Axel glared at Roxas. "Hey! The idea of stealing Saix' underwear is NOT stupid."

"Says the guy who sticks his Popsicle to his jeans."

"That was just once and you distracted me--"

"Ahem," Zack cleared his throat. "My attention?"

"I have no idea why I'm here in the first place," Cloud mumbled.

"Did you say something Cloud?" Zack asked. Cloud shook his head hopelessly. The former didn't notice the blonde's aura. "Ok, look what I found!" He waved wildly a piece of white paper.

"Shinra report?" Cloud guessed.

"Ice cream menu?" Roxas smiled excitedly.

"Cloud's first love letter to Tifa?" Axel smirked. Cloud blushed wildly.

Zack chuckled. "No, no and no… but that's a good idea. I think I'll look for that some other time."

"Not really a good idea," Cloud stammered nervously.

"So what is it?" Axel crossed his arms.

"We are going to give ol' Sephy a hell of a time," Zack announced. Cloud raised his hand. "What is it Cloud?"

"Does it involve stealing his shampoo?"

"Why would you want to steal his shampoo?" Roxas looked confused.

Cloud looked uncomfortable. "Well… whenever I get to fight him, his hair always smells nice..." There was suddenly an awkward silence. Roxas sipped another helping. He never liked this silence whenever the four of them got together.

"… Let's pretend we didn't hear that," Zack said. Cloud nodded vigorously. "ANYWAY, Let's try it!"

"Count me in!" Axel stood up.

"I think I hear someone calling for me," Roxas started to walk away. "I don't think I'll join--"

"Oh no you don't," Axel caught his friend's shirt. "It's Namine calling Sora."

Roxas huffed. "Well I don't know the difference. Riku's calling me Sora and you guys are calling him Roxas." Axel ignored this.

"I'm in," Cloud said.

Zack smiled satisfactorily. So maybe this day won't be boring.

.::::::::::.

Ways to Annoy Sephiroth

1. Slowly walk up to him with a seductive look in your eyes. Just when he starts to like the attention, yell out, "Wait a minute, you aren't Cloud!" Then kick his shins and run away. If you are a guy, dress up like a girl and when he starts to like the attention, pull off your wig and say the same thing. That should get an even bigger reaction...

"Why do I have to be the girl?!" Cloud glared at Zack like he was about to kill him.

"It was voted three against one," Zack calmly replied. "Democratic, huh?"

"That's not Democracy," Cloud countered. "You three are ganging up on me… again!"

"It is Democracy, Cloud," Axel laughed. "With a bit of cheating."

"I think you'll look great in a dress," Zack encouraged.

"And the wig?"

Roxas snorted. Cloud glared at the other blonde. Roxas shuddered. "You'll do fine, man."

Cloud sighed heavily. "If I pull this off, all of you owe me 1000 munny each."

Zack smiled triumphantly. "That's the mercenary spirit! Now give ol' Sephy--"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence," Cloud stalked off.

---

Sephiroth was staring peacefully at the view of Radiant Garden. The Dark Depths isn't exactly the perfect scene host but it should do… especially if you are often getting into fights with a certain blonde. Yes, this is the perfect spot to have that peace and relaxation. A light smile formed to his delicate lips.

Suddenly, he had the feeling he was being watched. He suddenly tensed up and looked serious. Judging by this silent observance of him, this must be Leon and the others. He slowly turned around and froze.

There was a horrible impression of a woman staring at him. A cold electrifying feeling bolted through his spinal cord and raised a few hairs at his body. It was unnerving… and awkward. If he ever really considered it could be Leon, the SEED soldier should have a therapy.

The… woman continued to stare at him. He's not really sure it she's trying to be alluring or just plain repulsive. He made a mental shudder. And where the hell did she got that dress? He looked around if he was just being set up by Avalanche or the RGR Committee. There wasn't anyone in the vicinity.

The figure shifted her stance to another pose. Sephiroth raised his eyebrows, disturbed at what the hell is that guy/girl doing.

Then something dawned on him. He walked closer.

The figure looked surprised. Then it screamed. "Wait a minute, you aren't Cloud!" the voice clearly belonged to a man. He – Sephiroth was sure it was a male – ran towards him. He tried to kick. Sephiroth easily dodged him and retaliate back. The man wasn't able to dodge since he had the ridiculous dress and high-heeled shoes. The silver-haired landed perfectly on the ground with a soft thud.

"I appreciate you finally recognized me not as my enemy but frankly I don't swing that way. Get a life." He walked away.

---

"… uh… Cloud?" It was Zack's and he was looking at the unconscious SOLDIER.

Cloud groaned. "I hate you. Do you know that?" He tried to be serious but everything was all blurry and he can't make out why there was 3 Zacks, 4 Axels, and 2 Roxas. It's enough it was one before… what would happen to the world if there was more?

"Hurray! Cloud is alive!" Zack grabbed Cloud's arms and made him sat up. "And FYI, we only owe you 500 munny. You didn't annoy the guy; you only made him shudder."

"You bas--"

"So let's move on to the second," Axel interrupted. "Who wants to do it this time?"

"I don't want voting!" Cloud complained. "You're ganging against me! And I don't feel right when I said I like myself that way."

"How about sticks? Whoever gets the shortest one does the next gig," Zack replied and pulled out a stick. He cut it in four and held it.

Everyone took one.

---

2. Dress up like Aerith - but in zombie form - with your arms stretched out screaming, "BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!" to the top of your lungs. Bump into the walls occasionally.

"STOP LAUGHING!"

The three laughed even harder. They were in front of Traverse Town's Hotel rooms, particularly in front of Aerith's. Zack had his anime vein popping anytime soon. This is ridiculous! He swore he won't be pulling anymore sticks.

"Be a sport Zack," Roxas beamed. "All's fair in love and war. Besides, it will be weirder if the three of us would borrow her clothes--"

"And me?! You think it wouldn't be weird?!" Zack glared daggers.

Axel waved him off. "Chill dude. You could be like the obsessive boyfriend--"

"Ah shut up" Zack said. But he cooled down somehow. "Ah well, might as well get this over. If I pull this off, You owe me 5000 munny."

"Hey! That's overpricing!" Cloud complained.

Zack smirked. "I am hot." He knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" a woman's voice echoed inside and Aerith opened the door. She beamed when she saw Zack then Cloud. "Oh, good afternoon Zack, Cloud… and Axel and… Roxas…" She looked a bit disturbed at what she saw. Roxas couldn't blame her. Who wouldn't be disturbed if Zack and Axel came knocking at your doorstep. "Don't tell me it's another one of Axel's stupid ideas."

"My ideas are not stu--"

"It's mine this time," Zack quickly replied proudly.

Aerith looked a bit unsure. "Does it involve hunting Cloud's first love letter to Tifa?"

Cloud looked flustered. "No really--"

"Not yet… maybe after we pull this off. Aerith, I need to borrow your clothes. And stop laughing!" The raven haired glared once more to the three.

She didn't quite understood what is funny about a man borrowing a girl's clothes. "Uh… Zack? I think you need some therapy--"

The three laughed even harder. Zack rolled his eyes. "No Aerith. I'm not gonna wear it… well, I will… but I won't run around screaming 'bananas'."

"Oh…. Ok. Wait right here," Aerith left the door and came back a little while later with a pair of her clothes. "They are big for my size. You can have them… and don't bother bringing them back, no offense."

"Thanks Aerith."

"Your welcome."

---

After that incident, Sephiroth decided to better head for Edge. People won't recognize him anyway because he wore his hair in a ponytail this time… yup, no one will recognize him. They would just avoid him because he had this mean look on his face. It's not his hair. Nope. Not THAT.

A guy passed his way and he screamed in surprise. Sephiroth was a bit indignant. Heck, he was way hotter than this old geezer. He is not doing anything—

"BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!"

Unimaginably ridiculous.

"BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!"

He turned around.

"BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!"

And wondered why an Aerith-impostor is shouting in a high nasal male voice in the middle of a city with lots of people behind him. Crap, people would think he is with this… girl.

He tried to move away from her radius.

"BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!" the zombie Aerith followed his pace. She smiled goofily at him. Kinda like—

"Zack?!"

"BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!"

"… what in JENOVA'S name are you doing?"

"BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!"

"In Aerith's dress?"

"BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!"

"With a wig?"

"…BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!"

"Zack!"

"BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!... … … AND STOP HUMILIATING ME IN PUBLIC! AND STOP LAUGHING!" Sephiroth watched as Zack looked straight behind the bus. Now that Zack had pointed it out, he can make out stifled laughter.

"What the hell is going on here?" Sephiroth looked really unnerved… like he was surrounded by crazed mental people.

"Uh… BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!" the Aerith-zombie-Zack bumped to a random post. The eyeliner is smudging all around his face. It didn't look good when he was smiling insanely. "BRAAAAIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!!!"

---

"Score! 15000 munny!" Zack jumped high and waved the money high up.

"Man, I'm broke," Cloud complained. "Will we just stop with the pay gig?"

---

3. Put itching powder inside his boots and gloves right before an important battle.

4. When it gets to the part of the guitar solo on his theme song, jump in the middle of the battle and start headbanging while holding a broom, that posing as the guitar.

"What happened to the sticks?" Roxas looked petrified.

"We don't have one now," Zack replied, face completely without make-up except for the light lipstick he kept on since he thought he looked gorgeous with it.

"How about voting?" Roxas suggested.

"Ok. All in favor Roxas will pull 3 and 4… say aye," Cloud said. "Aye."

"Aye's for weirdos," Axel said, ignoring Cloud's impulse on a comeback. "Ditto."

"Agreed, Aye's for weirdos… Ditto," Zack said. "See Roxas? It still works both ways."

"But why do I have to pull two stunts?"

"Because yours only have 1 sentence. So, we have to include the next so it will have 2."

"That doesn't do justice!"

"Of course it doesn't!" Axel replied like it was the most obvious thing. "If it does, we should have Kingdom Hearts by now and totally kicking Sora's a$$. Now, let's take Sora head on to Sephiroth."

---

3. Put itching powder…

Roxas already made a round on Sora and Sephiroth. They should start soon. He sneaked to the Forgotten City where Sephiroth is right now and sleeping (Villains have more work than heroes, y'know). He somehow found his boots and gloves and put the itching powder in it. Now, if this wasn't Roxas, per say Axel or Zack, there would probably a snicker coming right now. But this was Roxas so all he did was sigh that it was over. Boring little kid, huh?

4. Headbanging while holding a broom keyblade, that posing as the guitar…

"Key--"

"Yup. The Oathkeeper if you please."

"But--"

"You don't want the Oathkeeper? I understand. Kairi's not much of a thing. How about Oblivion? I knew you had this thing for Ri--"

"No I--"

"Kingdom Key then?"

"Axel!"

"What?"

"Do I really have to headbang?"

"… Is that what you really wanted to ask me?"

"Yes."

"So you'll go for the Oathkeeper?"

"Argh! I don't care! Whatever. Fine, I'll do it."

Axel beamed. "I knew you'll agree to me."

Roxas simply rolled his eyes and simply waited for that theme song to start.

---

Sephiroth finally decided it's enough. This day has gotten way out of hand. Then all of a sudden, he was called to have a fight against Sora. As much as he is aware, this has nothing to do with any game. He had his suspicions. MAYBE… this is about that 'events' happening to him. First was that mad man; then Zack saying 'BRAAAIIII--' he shut the thought. That's enough to last him for a while. What if this is another prank? Saphiroth suspected Zack is working with Melissa* hence all the insanity. But that girl should be back by next week. After a long thought, he simply got on to fighting Sora.

Whatever.

He slipped on his battle gear. Something is not right there but he's got much more important things to do. He disappeared in his lair and teleported to Dark Depths… again.

Sora wasn't still there but it did not surprise him. The boy is always late.

Ah, here he comes…

Something is definitely wrong. He did a quick check. Theme song? Check. Battle gear? Check. Masamune? Check. Everything is in place. What's wrong now.

Suddenly, he had the urge to rub his hand furiously; then his feet unto the ground. He started to scratch it lightly… then moderately… then crossly. Ugh!

Sora looked confused at what is going on. "Uh… Sephiroth? Why are you--"

"Ah, shut up!" Sephiroth replied. He tried to ignore the persistent superficial distraction.

Estuans interius ira vehementi

Estuans interius ira vehementi

"Aw crap!" Sephiroth jumped all around the ground. Sora scratched his head. Then something hit him. He suddenly looked serious and jumped around as well.

"Ah-ha! You want to beat me in a jumping contest!" Sora said.

"No! I--"

Then Roxas appeared out of nowhere. He had his keyblade in hand and banging his head.

Sephiroth had his WTF look the rest of the day.

---

"That was priceless!"

---

A/N: Reviews make my day!

* Melissa – she's the OC. She won't have any major role. She'll just be my media in coming up crazy ideas. Instead of me as the narrator-thingy, she'll be.