Darren Criss was a beautiful human being. All of his philosophies, ambitions and dreams inspired you. In a way, you felt like a female version of Darren. In fact, you knew him personally, and you two were actually quite close. You two spent some evenings fangirling (fanboying) over everything Disney, Broadway and Glee.
So, interestingly enough… you knew better than most that, although Darren was heterosexual, he somewhat harbored a crush on Chris. Every time his name would be mentioned by anyone, his face just lights up, and the endless stream of compliments ensue.
You were deathly jealous that he got to spend so much time with Chris, and you were sure your crush on Chris would reach Darren-status if only you got to meet him someday.
Since you recently joined the Starkid family following your recent graduation at University of Michigan (majoring in theatre and acting of course), Chicago had become your new home. Most members of Starkid lived in the same building, so it felt like one giant condo.
Because Darren was so busy just doing EVERYTHING, you spent the majority of your time working new plays, and laughing your ass off with the Joes, the Brians, Dylan, Jim, Lauren, Joey and the lot.
You guys finally had time off, because the next play couldn't go into the works until Darren came back for at least a visit and a meeting. The Starkids and you spent an evening in drinking, playing board games, and just enjoying each other's company.
Brolden leaned in mischievously once the night wore on and whispered your name quietly in your general direction. Head swimming, body warm and tingly, it took you a moment to respond with a giggle and hiccup," Sup? "
"Has anybody told you about the Department of Mysteries?" He grinned.
"Um, well I mean Harry freakin' Potter might have mentioned it in his sleep once or twice," you answer swiftly, body swaying to the music. Brolden laughed.
"Nah, man. We have one here, in this very building. It's legit. 3rd floor. There's this room that is always locked, but weird noises always comes from it. There are some nights we dare Joe to go down there naked just for the hell of it."
You opened your eyes widely. "Whaaaaat? Why naked?" Brolden shrugs. "Maybe it'll tempt the ghosts to open the door for him, Heehee!"
You both burst into fits of laughter, when suddenly there was a loud bang and-
"SURPRISE! DID SOMEBODY SAY DARREN CRISS?"
Jaime screamed in shock, and toppled over Lauren. You all snap your heads to the door, and there Darren is, with five bags of groceries on each arm, a silly smile plastered to his face.
"Darren! Man! We weren't expecting you!" Joey stands up and claps him on the shoulder and starts helping him with the groceries. Bless Joey; he was the most sober one of them all.
"Free evening to spend with all of YOU!" Darren replies giddily, opening a beer and immediately taking a hearty swig. "What's goin' on?"
"Brolden here is tellin' me about the Department of Mysteries!" you exclaim excitedly, while jumping up and dashing to him. "Say, Dare, wanna go check it out with me? Pretty please?" You lean heavily against him and bat your eyelashes.
"Well if you must insist, challenge accepted," He downs the rest of his beer, belches politely and grabs another one, popping off the top with his teeth. "Let's go!"
"Finally!" somebody hoots, as they all crowd out of the room, shushing each other not to wake up the other tenants. It was probably in vain because none of you could really stay steady enough or straight-faced enough to keep from giggling and tripping down the hallways and stairs.
They reach the 3rd floor, and AJ stops in front of a door that says, "Maintenance Only," looks around at them all, with a sly smile. He slowly lifts a finger, making a 'hush' motion before opening the door quietly.
The hallway is dimly lit by a flickering florescent bulb. Pushed up to the side were a warning 'Wet Floor' sign and a grungy mop. But directly adjacent was what drew the group's attention.
There was a door with no handle. You couldn't tell whether or not you were imagining the pink glow seeping through the cracks in your drunken stupor. The sounds emitting from the door reminded you a lot of the sounds of Saturn's rings that you listened to in one of your recent Astronomy lectures. It was scary; yet fascinating… looks of awe came across the drunken group.
Brosenthal bravely stepped forward and pushed against the door with a measured force. It did not budge. He shrugged and looked in your direction.
"Well that was kind of anti-climactic," you state bluntly.
"Awww, c'mon maybe he wasn't doing it right," Darren sighed and handed his beer to Moses before looking at you, and linking arms with you; anticipation bright in his hazel eyes. He was so adorable. "Can I just put you on my keychain, Dare?"
He chuckles at your joke, which gives you a fluttery feeling in your tummy. Suddenly, the joining of your forces with Darren made you feel magical.
You two skipped forward and rammed into the door. Unexpectedly, you both yelp as you fall through, as it slides open smoothly, crashing to the floor in a tangled heap. You both burst out laughing and you hear commotion on the other side. But it was muffled because the sounds of space were much louder.
From the cold, dark floor, you press an outstretched palm and shove your weight into the door to get back to the rest of you friends. No such luck. You sighed in frustration as Darren heaved himself off of the floor.
"Whoa…" he trails off.
You turn to see what he's making a deal out of. The room was dark, cramped, like a broom cupboard... but it was soon obvious that the faint pink glow was not of the imagination.
On the far wall, the one both you and Darren were now turned facing, appeared to have smooth electrical currents flowing through it. Pink electricity that looked soft, kind of like in one of those toys you bought in novelty shops.
Darren helped you up from the floor and you smile gratefully at him before you two lean in and observe it more closely.
The wall seemed translucent, or as if it wasn't completely solid. "Where are we?" you ask in wonder. Darren's eyes are wide as he just shakes his head, raising one arm cautiously toward the strange wall.
"Wai-"
But it was too late Darren's hand makes contact and slides through, as if the wall was as thin as air.
"What the fuck?" Darren pulls his arm free, as if he got shocked.
"Did that hurt?" you ask nervously, taking his hand and flipping it over to see if there was any damage. None.
"No.. It felt warm and tingly... just threw me off..." Darren mutters, still staring at the wall.
It was probably not a good idea, in your opinion, but you were far too curious and not sober enough to realize that reaching your arm out to mimic Darren could have consequences.
Your stomach fell in a swoop when your hand slipped through the electrical current wall as if it wasn't there. It was such an unnatural feeling, but it was warmer, and your hand tingled slightly; just as Darren described.
You pulled your hand free, satisfied with enough discovering for the day. You then made a grab for Darren when you suddenly felt dizzy. He took your hand in his, and then both your hands lit up the bright pink for a moment before the entire room went black.
You panicked for a few microseconds until suddenly there was a voice. It didn't sound human, and it didn't even seem like it was out loud. It was just said, like the room was whispering to them, "Thank you for visiting the Matrix."
Your mouth pops open soundlessly, before it felt like you were shoved roughly in the chest. You and Darren fall backwards out of the door, heads smacking the floor, hands still linked.
You blink several times, and your vision clears, seeing Lauren's beautiful pixie-like face looking down on you in concern. "Are you guys alright? What was in there?"
You and Darren are helped to your feet, and you two look at each other finding words to explain what had happened in that short minute.
"We're not really sure…" Darren said finally, and then rubbed his aching head for a moment before glancing back at the door, which had resumed looking innocently locked, yet still mysterious.
"I think we should go back, I'm too drunk to be sure any of this is really happening," you slur, leaning into Lauren, who was helping you through the main door and back up the steps.
Once back into their large, conjoined room, Joey flips on the TV and settles next to Walker while everyone else gets ready for bed. Jaime immediately passes out in the recliner, one sock hanging off her toe.
You laugh to yourself, make your way to your bed and collapse on it, face buried in your pillows. You feel a weight next to you a few moments later, but you know it's Darren without looking because of his cologne.
"Brolden is passed out on my bed, can I sleep here?" Darren asks shyly. "Mmmmhmmm.." you mumble through your pillows, too tired to move from your position or to say any coherent words.
You hear Darren huff out a sigh as he gets comfortable next to you. "I feel drunker than I should be.. I only had 2 beers."
"Mmm?" is your response.
"You know," Darren continued thoughtfully. "That was really fucking weird... you heard that voice too, didn't you?"
You finally turn on your side, so you can face Darren and talk to him properly. "I did, and it kind of gave me the creeps, can we just forget about it now and talk it over in the morning?" you yawn.
"Yeah," Darren affirms while scratching his stubbly cheek and closing his eyes. "'G'night…" he mumbles, and within seconds his breathing becomes deeper. He looked so peaceful, so you decided to brush a curl of his forehead affectionately.
Soon enough, your heavy eyelids finally won, and sleep overcame you as well.
—-
It was beginning to be light out and you were coming in and out of consciousness, knowing full well that when you drank too much you weren't able to sleep peacefully. Your body felt strange, like it was heavier than normal and itchy in areas you've never been itchy before. But your head hurt so much, that you didn't even care to notice.
What felt like minutes later, you heard clanging from the kitchen. Joey, chef extraordinaire always having to make us breakfast… you think to yourself. Your ears were extra sensitive, and it sounded like he was talking to somebody.. A voice you didn't recognize at first.
The voice laughed and then sounded like it was getting closer to your bedroom door. Darren was snoring softly to your right, which didn't make sense because you swore he passed out on your left. There was a soft knock, and a sing song voice.
"Darren! There's someone here to see you!"
You immediately froze, because you knew that voice from anywhere. It was so much more beautiful in person.
Chris Colfer.
Your stomach erupted in fangirling butterflies and your eyes snapped open. You turned excitedly toward Darren to shake him awake, but instead gasped out in shock.
The person snoring next to you softly was yourself. It was so outlandish and unbelievable, your vision became tunnel.
"HOLY HELL!" you hollered, then flinched at the sound of your voice, because it wasn't yours. It was Darren's. You looked down, immediately making a grab for your breast, but instead, your hands cupped around Darren's pectoral.
What the fuck was going on?
The body next to you stirred, and then eyelids opened slowly. When you saw yourself looking at you, there was nothing else in the world to describe it. In one fluid movement, more graceful than you ever saw yourself, the body next to you jumped off the bed, and backed into the wall looking horrified.
"WHATTHEFUCKAREYOU? YOU'RE ME!" she screamed, bed head in full force.
"Dar-" you begin, hands up in surrender; but the door flies open.
"Well the sun is up, the birds are chirping, what are you two yelling about in here?" Chris chimed in cheerfully.
You had forgotten he was there, but there he was in all his glory, his beauty was almost blinding.
"Chris! What are you doing here?" a voice that was yours sounded breathless.
Chris glanced in your direction, and then held his hand out to, would be you and said, "I came here to surprise Darren! Wanted to hang with you cool Starkids, I don't believe I've met you before, I'm Chris!"