Admit it...I'm sure many of us have thought about "what if" scenarios involving somehow meeting up with the best crew in gaming!...ok that may be an exaggeration for some of you but this is how I feel. So here's my take on bonding with them. And let's pretend they all know who I am due to being player one I guess XD.

I own nothing but this story.

Oh and anything in italics is my thoughts.

This...is unbelievable.

There's no possible way I'm actually on the Normandy right now. I remember falling asleep and randomly flying in a dream when all of sudden, everything faded to white. The strange part is that it felt like I was gaining consciousness as the fading dissipated. Now here I am, awkwardly standing in a corner of the Starboard Observation room, where Ashley usually resides. The alarming part of this situation...Ashley's not the only one here; the whole crew is present, casually laughing and joking around. It seems I've popped up shortly after the end of the Reaper War. Why do I think this? Well…

I can see Ashley, Wrex, Grunt, and Jack occupying the bar. I kinda expected that. Looks like Joker's off to the side egging people on to keep drinking, likely wanting to see who can pass out first while taking modest sips of his own drink.

Then there's Tali and Garrus occupying one end of the sofa; surprise, surprise they're lost in each other. The smoothest Turian in the galaxy has the most adorable Quarian around in a fit of giggles.

Ok, that's the cutest thing I've seen so far. Right on, Garrus!

Sigh Omg...there's the beauty in blue that is Liara, and she's talking to…

Holy Crap!

"Shepard?"

That seemed to get everyone's attention, seeing how my voice wasn't a familiar one on the ship. Whoever was sitting, was now standing. Those who were already standing were facing me with looks of shock and curiosity. In that moment, I could also see Samara, Traynor, and Miranda, in the room as well.

This room's bigger than I thought.

"Well look who it is! What took you so long to finally come see us, buddy?" Shepard, with a noticeable limp in her step, spoke as if she'd always known me, or known of me for that matter. That was completely unexpected. I guess characters are actually able to know of the players who control them...I'll keep that in mind.

"Well ya know, bouncing from one reality to the next can be quite tough." And random. "Trust me when I say I'd always wanted to hang around you guys, just never knew that it was actually possible, so uhhhh...Hey guys!"

To my amusement, everyone addressed me animatedly. I had no idea that as badly as I wanted to meet the Normandy Crew, they were also dying to see me. I didn't know it was possible to care so strongly for a group of people you've never actually hung around, but it in this moment, it was like finally uniting with a family you've always wanted to be a part of.

"I'm just asking this to make sure: are the Reapers defeated?"

I was answered with the biggest "Hell yeah!" I've ever heard in my life, not including the ones you'd here from a crowd for a certain Steve Austin, but it was the loudest response I'd ever heard.

Well, that answers that.

"Those giant pyjaks were blown to hell a couple weeks back, and the next day, we had to dig Shepard outta the rubble left behind." Wrex turned his head in Shepard's direction. "At least this time you didn't look like patty meat when you were found. Bahahaha!"

Shepard playfully rolled her eyes. "Love you too, Wrex."

Joker decided to speak up as well. "Seriously Commander. You didn't need to be the cliche 'Hero who died saving us all.' I prefer you alive so the galaxy can at least properly kiss your ass for saving theirs so many times...with help from the best pilot in existence ofcourse.

This guy's great. "Couldn't have said it better myself, Joker." I quickly tilt my head to the right with a sly smile. "Hey Ash. No need to be quiet over there. I don't bite."

"I'm just soaking in the buzz, cutie. Wait, did I say that out loud? Shit...this is why I didn't want to say anything. Diarrhea of the mouth and what not...yeah...shutting up now."

I did my best to hide the huge smile threatening to split my face in half at any moment. Hopefully it could be interpreted as me trying not to burst with laughter like everyone else at Ashley's rather unexpected and uncharacteristic shyness and flirt. A reserved drunk huh? Also noted.

"Surely my eyes don't deceive me. Is that a psychotic biotic occupying the bar?"

"You bet your ass it is. The one and only, baby!" With that, she downs the remainder of her drink in one emphatic chug. "Whooo! We got Dev in the house!"

"Hell Yeahh you do!...say uhhh you guys mind if I have a seat? I'd hate for my feet to start killing me anytime soon. The curse of being extremely flat-footed."

With that, Shepard patted the space opposite the one occupied by Liara.

"So tell me, how does it feel to be here, Dev? I know it's a lot to take in. You seem to be taking your reality jump quite well."

"Honestly, Shepard...i couldn't be happier. I know sometimes it's a downer to meet your heroes because you find out they're real people with real problems, but I think the trick is to never forget that. I know I wasn't physically here, but I felt to a certain degree everything you guys went through, good and bad. Besides, it feels like I've known you guys for a long time and vice versa."

She looked at me with a playful smirk. "You trying to steal my thunder, Dev? It's my job to give passionate speeches."

"Haha nahhh I could never live Commander Shepard's life. But I wouldn't mind being a part of it."

Shepard cocked a brow at the word choice near the end. "Are you throwing out hints over there...buddy?" Was that a wink.

"Uhhhh well I didn't mean for it to sound like that but umm- it's a nice thought. I mean- there's nothing wrong with the ide- wow it's getting hot in here. Liara! Shepard's teasing!"

That earned a chuckle from both ladies. "I am sorry, Dev, but I have a hard time handling the great Commander Shepard myself. She can be quite playful, as well as stubborn."

"Hey!" Shepard looked at Liara with mock hurt. "You're supposed to support my craziness as a friend, Li!"

Wait…friend?

"So you two aren't dating?" I managed to ask while they were in the middle of playful banter.

"We are not. Shepard and I have a very strong friendship. I dare say it's a sort of sisterhood at this point… though I do think of myself as the older sister looking out for her little troublesome sibling." Liara gave Shepard a little elbow bump for emphasis.

"Yeah, right! I don't go looking for trouble. It actually has a knack for finding me."

Garrus decided to cut in on this as well. "I think we can all agree that Shepard is a trouble magnet...and we're ok with that."

"Yep."

"Totally."

"No argument there."

Shepard simply shook her head and grinned. "Well it's nice to see everyone loves me for me." Then she decided to look directly at me. "But, let's make our guest of honor the center of attention here. And I have one simple question for you."

That has to be the most devious smile I've ever seen...oddly enticing, too.

"I'm an open book. I'll answer any question you've got," I said while confidently folding my arms. This should be good.

"Alright then. So what I'd like to know…" She tilts her head upwards, pretending to think when I know she's already formulated whatever question she has to ask. "Out of all the ladies here" oh shit "who would you romance and why?"

In that moment, it looked like every woman in the room decided to give me "the eyes." Ya know, the half lidded eyes that makes them look even more attractive and give off that "up to no good" vibe. I feel screwed.

"Would you believe me if I said that question is very hard to answer?"

Shepard smirked at the remark. "Can't answer the question with a question, Dev. Besides…" She leaned in closer. "everyone barring Tali is single. Who knows what could come of your answer."

And again, oh my God!

Surely I looked like a complete idiot with my mouth hanging open and eyes wide as saucers. This has to be the absolute best day of my life. Not only do I get to hang out with these people, but I even have a chance with one of the awesome female members of the crew?

"Shouldn't be that hard of a choice really," Miranda piped up. That accent is euphoric… "If your taste consists of beauty, brains, strong will, responsibility, and loyalty, then you don't have to look any further."

I decided to be a bit cheeky with her. "Well you're not lying. I don't need to step out of this room to find women with those particular assets. Ofcourse, it takes more than those to catch my eye...a sense of humor and maybe a 'hellcat' in bed." I looked in Ashley's direction and winked. "I'm going to be honest here though; the answer has a three-way tie. Anybody wanna gimme a drumroll?"

Garrus decided to vigorously clap his hands against Tali's thighs, causing another uproar of chuckles.

"Seriously, this guy is the best bro of the galaxy!" I clear my throat and give a 5-second pause before pointing at and naming each potential partner. "Ashley, Liara, aaaaaand...Shepard." Since I'm right next to the last name called, I was sure to get in her face as I said her name.

Ashley, who has been mostly quiet other than when providing her occasional laugh, had perked up from her seat at the bar. Liara gave a bashful yet noticeable smile while Shepard met my gaze with a challenging smirk of her own.

"Hold on a sec," said Ashley all of a sudden as she stood up from the bar and sat beside me so that I'd be between all three of my top crushes. "There. Now the pressure's on. And don't worry big guy" she leaned in to whisper into my ear. "I don't bite."

"No cheating, Ash! You're making him flustered."

"You're one to talk, Skipper. You've been giving him the 'fuck me' eyes since he's been near you."

"Now, now ladies. No need to get all catfight-y. Besides, I have my reasons for being so interested in all three of you." I look to Ashley first. "Ash, even though there were moments when your frustrations had gotten in the way of what's actually important, you're still worth it. For starters, look at you. The long hair, beautiful skin, kissable lips, and don't even get me started on that body." Damn, is that blushing or some internal bleeding getting out of hand? "As far as your personality goes, you don't hesitate to stick to your guns and let people know how you feel, whether they wanna hear it or not. Your love for poetry is something to admire as well. Other than your extensive knowledge of it, you've made it into an outlet for expressing yourself when words can't exactly cut it. To show off my poetic skills, I have one for you to close out this affectionate speech for you." I cleared my throat before reciting my own 100% made-up poem. "I like a girl who knows her way around a gun, and knows how to have all the fun."

I had no idea Ashley Williams could snort until I uttered that ridiculous rhyme. I regret nothing!

"To be knocked off my feet and then rolling on the floor all at the same time!" She exclaimed between giggles. "You amaze me!"

"What can I say? Speaking from the heart can getcha places," I responded with a wide grin. For good measure, I decided to give the second human Spectre a peck on the cheek before I turned to my other two love interests. "So who's next? Liara? Shepard?"

"Whataya say, Li? Rock Paper Scissors?"

Liara nodded before putting on her game face.

"Rock...paper...scissors…shoot!" They both had paper. "Again! Rock...paper...scissors...shoot!" Shepard had paper; Liara used rock. "Yes!"

Liara grinned at Shepard. "It is alright. I know humans have a thing for saving the best for last."

Shepard responded with a light punch on her shoulder. A second later, she turned her attention to me, leaning her head on one hand while staring into my eyes. I couldn't let myself waver from the mindgame.

"Ash was right, ya know," I started. "You're quite good at practically undressing people with your eyes." There goes that classic Shepard smirk. "But don't think you'll throw me off-balance." I took a deep breath, starting with a rhetorical question. "So, what is there to say about the great Commander Shepard that she hasn't heard already? She's brave, eager, cunning, and is capable of out-talking just about anyone in the galaxy? Those are givens ofcourse, on top of the sexy good looks. What I admire most about you, Shepard, is that in spite of everything in life you've been through, you still put others before yourself. Selflessness is something I'm known for back at home, for I'm there whenever someone needs me. But you, you take it to another level. Though trillions more could've helped with this, there was only one woman who carried the hopes of the galaxy on her shoulders. No other could match your tenacity, your desire to make sure every organic/synthetic in the galaxy experiences a time of peace within said galaxy. And in spite of the pedestal you were placed on, you remembered you were still human and couldn't accomplish everything all on your own. You looked to the team you built along the way, a group of people from different races, who you can now consider a family. You didn't let the hard times keep you down; hell, if anything, the hardships brought you all even closer. You care for everyone and do your best to see others happy, even if it's at your expense. When I look at you, I see someone who's done it all for others, and it's about time someone did for her."

I grabbed one of her hands and gave it a light squeeze. "Sorry that took so long. Couldn't hold back, ya know?"

Shepard and speechlessness usually don't go hand-in-hand, but right now, it's like they were meant for each other.

"Woah...well...I...uhhh.."

"What's this? Is Shepard actually tripping over words? Damn kid, you oughta go steal one of her medals for that one," Jack commented, mirroring my own thoughts in a way. "Not gonna lie though, I may not be one for sappy shit, but after a speech like that, I'd have jumped you right there in front of everyone."

"Hahahaha well Jack, I'll give you this...that's not a bad thought at all." I released Shepard's hand and decided to give her some time to reboot after her malfunction. "Alright! Last one, ready Liara T'Soni?"

"Ofcourse. Though I cannot imagine my speech being all that grand. There's not much that I'd find special about me other than my knowledge of the Protheans," she solemnly said with her head down.

"Awww don't say that, Liara. There's more to you than you think. For instance, in my honest opinion, you're the most attractive Asari I've ever seen. The eyebrows, the freckles, and the innocent youth all over your feature. You're quite the sight to behold. And don't even get me started on that voice. Good Lord."

Did she just turn purple?

"And let's look at how you started, an adorably naive and socially awkward archeologist. The way you stumbled over words and misinterpreted certain social interactions were things that made you all the more cute in my eyes. Then you transformed into a driven and calculating information broker. The additional badassery to your arsenal added a little more spice to your personality. And finally, there was what you did for Shepard...you helped bring her back. If you hadn't found her body and allowed Miranda to oversee that she's brought back to life to guarantee the galaxy has a tomorrow, well, there would be no happy ending for anyone until maybe the next cycle. What you did showed me how loyal you are to the ones you care for. I stood and walked over to give her a meaningful hug. "Anyone would be lucky to have you Liara, and they damn well better appreciate having you."

The unshed tears I saw in her eyes would've broken my heart if I hadn't known they were out of happiness for having someone speak so highly of her when she had thought so little of herself. She wiped her eyes and gave me a warm smile. "Thank you, Devin. I never thought I would actually hear someone talk about me in such way."

I gingerly step back to my seat and grin at her. "Everyone deserves to know their worth. If they don't know it, then there's someone who'll gladly let them know of it."

Grunt spoke up from the bar. "Alright, we got all the mushy stuff outta the way? Who's the best mate to have?"

"Right! Well uhhh.."

"Wait a minute," said Shepard. I'm actually thankful for the interruption. "I just wanted to put my response out there...you hit the nail on the head when it came to everything you said about me." It was her turn to hold my hand now. "Thank you for recognizing the fact I'm not invincible and for not using some crazy hero worship speech to get to my heart….or in my bed for that matter."

I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped me. "It's no big deal really. Ofcourse, I'd be lying if I didn't consider you one of the rarest gems in the galaxy."

"I'm with Grunt. Less mushing. More choosing."

Way to ruin the moment Joker. I'm gonna have to spray paint "Cockblock" on the back of your leather seat one day.

"Right. Hmmmm…" I leaned back on my spot and closed my eyes to think long and hard (HA) about my decision. "Ok...I've made my choice…" I looked each woman in the eye (Yes, woman, I know Liara's monogendered. Don't @ me!) very carefully until I settled on a pair of green ones. "Whataya say, Shepard?"

As an answer, a hand flew to the back of my neck and our lips came crashing together in what was, to me, the most passionate kiss I've ever done in life, and in front of an audience too!

Ash and Liara both smiled at us. "Sorry...I guess you guys saw that coming when I had so much to say about Shepard, huh?"

Liara nodded sagely while Ashley was the first to respond. "Yeah but hey, it's no biggie. You still kissed me first." She decided to stick her tongue out at Shepard.

Shepard playfully rolled her eyes and responded in kind. "That's alright, Williams. You only had his mouth on your cheek. I've got more places in mind."

Man, did it get hot in here?

"You sure you wanna get frisky this soon, Shepard? I DID catch that limp earlier."

"Didn't you say you knew me for my tenacity?"

Damn, she got me there.

"Touché."

"Damn right, touché. As a matter of fact, my cabin, 5 minutes. There's no telling how long you got here, and I'm about to make every second count," she proclaimed as she made her way outta the lounge.

With that, I looked to everyone else. "Would it be a bad time to tell her I've never had sex, sex?"

Everyone collectively smirked as Garrus was the one to speak up. "Oh don't you worry, kid. Surely she'll take good care of you. If Shepard can bring out the best in all of us on the battlefield, surely she can make a fine bedmate out of someone."

Tali decided to move her head in his direction. "And how could you be so sure of that, Vakarian?"

"No, it's not like that babe. It was just an assumption," Garrus said while seemingly talking at 90 words per second. "Dev, gimme a hand here."

I made my way to the door and gave a mock sigh. "Sorry Garrus. I'm about to be in the middle of some...calibrations."

As the doors closed behind me, I could hear one last cacophony of laughter.

Sorry if you didn't get to hear enough from your favorite characters. This was just heavily on my mind for a couple days and was written in a hurry because I have a lengthy assignment to do and I can at least get this story outta my brain so that I can focus on that assignment. Hope everyone enjoyed the read. If ya didn't...too bad for me then, right? XD