"The dead have returned back to life and are attacking the living with homicidal and cannibalistic tendencies."

When I first heard the news reporter state this on Channel 16 DGN News, I couldn't believe it (or wouldn't believe it, if there was a difference). But when my unit got called up to take position at a local church and guard it at rescue station, I knew the news reporter wasn't yanking my or anyone else's leg: The dead were back from wherever the hell it was they went to. My blood turned cold and my soul cringed with a fear I never knew existed. All I could do was load up and head to the church and take a defensive position around it and wait and…shoot for the head….destroy the brain of any dead…thing that came near the church. Sure, sounded easy enough.

I was twenty-eight, then. Young, but smart, quick and full of enough common sense to know better than the crap that was being fed down to us by some higher up person who was so full of lead they set off metal detectors ten miles off. I wasn't about to put myself in an unknown position against an enemy I wasn't sure about, just to guard some church; a hospital, sure, but not a small church on the outskirts of town. Besides, according to the news, no one really knew what was happening. Chaos was the new order and calm had deteriorated into a sick, thin waste. So instead of reporting to my unit, which was lead by an arrogant wide load who could barely buckle his pants, let alone have enough sense to set up a sound, solid and secure defensive perimeter, I jumped in my jeep and left town with food, weapons, ammo, medical supplies and water. I was heading toward the Mountains (I figured in all the wild, I would have a better chance of survival. Besides, my old man had a cabin out there). Hell was on the earth and I wasn't about to become swallowed up by it.

I didn't make it too far. On the outskirts of the next city (sticking to the back roads only, which was smart in the end), my jeep blew a tire and I slammed into a tree. Heavy, cold rain mixed with ice was falling, making the roads treacherous. When the tire went, so did all control of the jeep. I quickly jumped out, accessed the area I was in (a back road littered with small homes here and there) and searched for any of the dead. I had yet to see any, but I didn't take any chances. While I searched I carefully gathered all of my supplies and quickly began walking down the road. The jeep was no longer any good and I knew I had to use my feet to get to some form of safety. I considered breaking into one of the homes since night was falling swiftly, but decided to keep moving. I searched for vehicles, but found none (everyone had ran to the rescue stations). That was fine. For a reason I couldn't explain to myself, I felt more secure and safe on my feet.

I walked for about a half of mile and night had almost completely descended, when I saw the roof of a mall over a bunch of dark and wet tree tops. I stopped walking and looked around. I saw nothing and heard nothing but the falling rain mixed in with the ice; I could see my breathe float out like a white, moist cold ghost in front of me. My eyes went back to the roof top of the mall. The area I was in had been evacuated according to the news, so the mall would be empty. I thought about this and then made up my mind. Except for maybe a few looters, I thought the mall would be a safe place to wait the night through. Besides, I knew what Mall it was and knew my way around the mall well; I had moonlighted as a security officer at the mall just a year before and had just quit the position two months prior to the outbreak of the dead. My eyes studied the roof top of the mall. I nodded my head and got going.

The malls large paved parking lot was soaked and glittered with rain and ice. The mall itself seemed to stand as if it were not a modern day creation, but the creation of an ancient structure formed to protect not the living, but the dead itself. I hesitated at this thought and stopped jogging and paused under a parking lot lamp light that caste down weak and defeated yellow light onto me. I studied the mall. I saw no looters or no dead. I saw no cars. Silence reigned with a power that spooked me. I wondered if it was smart to go into the mall? I knew I was scaring myself and forced control on myself once more: "Just until morning," I told myself. I nodded my head and almost left the safety of the lamp light when I saw it, a figure, walking slowly in the darkness, toward me. My skin dropped all of it's blood and went grave cold. I knew it was….a dead one. I dropped all of my supplies and pulled my rifle from my shoulder. I took aim, looking through my scope, and studied the dead thing coming toward me. Slow, very slow. Young, maybe twenty. And…yes, a large bite wound on the left check. And dead, this guy was dead.

I quickly put my rifle back on my shoulder and pulled my hunting knife from my left leg. I didn't want to fire my rifle because I was afraid the sound of rifle fire would draw more dead as well as the living. I wanted as little contact with both as I could get. I glanced down at the knife's blade and studied my thoughts for a few seconds. I wondered if I had what it took to survive--to take the blade of my knife and kill a dead living thing that was coming for me. I wanted to run. My blood was cold. I was terrified. But I knew I had what it took to survive; I had to. The sound of a low, hungry groan made me raise my head. The dead guy was close. I bit my lower lip and left the light of the parking lot lamp to do what I had to do.

The dead thing was slow, but hungry and jerked toward me as I circled it, keeping my distance. I carefully examined it, studying its weakness and vulnerabilities. I found many but the one danger it imposed was enough to keep me at a distance. I had heard that even if you got scratched by one of the dead, then you would become infected, die and come back as the walking dead yourself. "Well, buddy," I said, "I guess it's time." And with those words, I made a swift movement, got behind the guy before he could jerk toward me violently, kicked him in the back and to the ground, and before he could even move, I was on in and had the blade of my knife through his skull and into his brain. The guy jerked violently and then lay silent. I sat on his back breathing in the cold night air hard and scared. It was worse than I thought, but also, not as bad.

After a few seconds, I scrambled to my feet--leaving my knife where it rested--and looked around. I saw nothing. I felt like I was alone. I turned and returned back t supplies and picked them up. I wanted in the mall and to the security cage in the back of the security office. I wanted to rest there for the night--I wanted to feel safe. I knew the security office had a heavy metal door behind the glass doors that opened to the public. I wanted to shut myself up behind those heavy metal doors, go to the security cage, lock myself in and rest for the night. "Then let's go inside," I told myself. I calmly made my way to the mall's main entrance, took a deep breath, tried the side manual door and found it unlocked. "You're shitting me," I said. "Talk about freaking damn luck." I saw no blood smears on the any of the glass doors or any broken glass or sign of a struggle near the doors. I felt safe to enter the mall. I walked through the manual side door and then turned and locked it. "Here we go," I said, and walked on into the mall.

The wasn't a large two story creature like you would see in a big city. This mall was only a normal one story mall with two large department stores located at each end normal department stores throughout and a small food court with five restaurants. I figured if you lapped the mall in one large loop, you would walk almost a mile. I knew every section of the mall and had walked many miles conducting my rounds while I worked there. I felt secure being on familiar ground. I felt secure knowing where everything was--it was as if I were back in my own home. But I also knew of the potential dangers surround me. If I killed one of the dead outside, then it was possible some were inside, especially with the outside manual door being unlocked. I dropped my supplies to my feet and took my rifle into my hands. I would conduct a sweep and clear first, leaving my supplies at the entrance just in case I had to make a run for it. I was in the middle womb of the mall, and decided to go to my right first.

To my shock, all of the stores were open, no security gates had been drawn; this worried me. I paused and bit my lower lip. I was torn. I was glad the stores were open because I could become a looter and get more supplies. But it also meant I had to check each and every store and that would take hours. I knew I needed rest, but also knew my safety mattered the most. "Go to the main office, get the keys, lock the stores and just check the ones you need stuff from?" I asked myself. "No, if there are any of those things, they need to be killed. Someone else might try to come here and they could be attacked." A sense of duty overwhelmed me. I loved being a cop, serving and protecting. But I also knew when chaos reigned, your sense of duty was defeated by a raw sense of survival. I felt like a justified traitor to my profession. But what could I do? When all was said and done, and if man kind survived, I would just come back and claim mental strain and go back to being a cop--everyone cop would. I was told by a friend that ninety-percent of the force had deserted, and those that remained were just the hard case ones who believed war was glory and peace was a poor waste of time.

I walked down to the large J.C. Penny's at the end of the right side of the mall and did a sweep. I found nothing or no one. I checked my watch. Eight-forty. I wanted to be competed with the sweep and clear by midnight. Slowly, patiently and carefully and I made my way through the mall. At one-ten in the morning, I completed my sweep and clear. I encountered nothing or no one. Feeling satisfied, I went and retrieved my supplies and made my way to the security office, locked myself in tight, found the keys to the security cage in my old desk and locked myself in there. Feeling safe enough to sleep. I lay my head down on the cot and closed my eyes. I saw the dead guy outside with my knife in his brain. Who was he? What was he doing at the mall? But the question that really attached itself to my mind like a thick leech was: Where was the damn dead things that attacked him? Was it outside somewhere? Maybe. I didn't know. I assumed the…zombie (yes, zombie, I forced myself to admit) was outside somewhere. I had to assume this to maintain a safety frame of mind. I had to think and remain alert and aware and…I drifted off into a disturbed sleep.

I awoke to someone hitting the outside of the metal security office door. Startled and half asleep, I jumped to my feet and immediately cursed myself for acting so scared and abrupt without thinking first. I calmed myself and examined the hitting sounds. The zombies weren't strong enough to hit a door that hard. I listened and then heard a woman's voice followed by a man's voice. The tones were argumentative and uncertain. I glanced at the security monitors that rested on the far left wall. The mall was clear. I saw nothing or no one. I unlocked the cage door and carefully and quietly made my way to the steel door and listened. "Someone has to be in there! The damn door didn't lock by itself!" The man's voice seemed beyond angry. I heard a tone that reminded me of someone close to murder.

"Well kicking and hitting the door isn't doing any good. I wouldn't open up if I heard someone kicking and hitting the door." The woman's voice seemed calm and in control, but almost to the point of impatience.

Without reluctance, I unlocked the heavy door and pulled it open. I did this because I knew the woman was in danger. I heard fear in her voice over her calmness. I heard a deep fear. "So," the man snarled at the woman, "wouldn't open up, huh?"

The man was large, like a bear, maybe in his early forties. He was wearing a gray suit of all things. He had long curly hair a face that was shaven but needed a beard. He looked brutal and his eyes were as I suspected they would be. The woman was tall, thin and had blond hair. She was wearing a green sweater and jeans with tennis shoes. She wasn't beautiful, but she wasn't ugly. She looked natural and clean in her appearance and principals. Her eyes held the fear I thought they would. "I'm officer Roger Lodge. Is there anyone else with you?" I asked, immediately bringing my badge from out from my left back pocket and throwing on my professional tone. To my shock, the sight of my badge crippled the big man's rage. He turned into an obedient little child.

"No, sir," he told me. He looked down at his right hand. "For protection." He held up a .38 revolver. He looked at the woman. "This is Vaughn."

The woman looked at me. "No relation. He's owns a jewelry shop here in the mall. When the Army came in and forced and immediate evacuation, we had to leave. But, he wanted to come back. I just happened to be the manager of the shop. When I said I wouldn't go, he took me at gun point. Creep." The woman's voice was in control and calm, but full of relief.

"I did not force you to come with me," the man said. "My name is John Matthews. I'm an obedient, law abiding citizen and--"

"High as a kite," I said and with one swift move snatched the .38 from the man's hand. Now I understood why the woman held fear in her voice. The man was high on something. His eyes were twitching and nervous and his calm demeanor fake and dangerous. He was a bomb waiting to explode. But, for whatever reason, when I snatched the gun from his hand, he backed away from me and ran out of the security office.

"Thank you," Vaughn told me. She explained in a sigh of relief: "He threatened to kill me if I didn't come in with him. We came to the security office because he was worried someone might be in here and might conspire to steal his stuff. Paranoia at it's best. Good thing I suggested it. Anyway, I couldn't act afraid in front of him. I knew as soon as I did he might do something dangerous."

"Well, he's high on something and loose." I turned and studied the security monitors. I watched the man run through an exit door and outside. The metal exit door slammed shut behind him. "How did you get in?" I asked.

"My dad owns this mall. I was working as a manager because…stupidly, I was involved with Mr. Runaway. He was sweet and charming at first…all the way up until recently, to be honest. And then…he snapped. He's very religious, and I think he thinks Hell has come to the earth." Vaughn walked to my old desk and sat down on it. "I have keys to the mall.

"You were having an affair," I said. I turned to her.

"So you noticed his wedding ring. Very attentative. Tell me, which Hardy boy are you?"

"Where's his wife?"

"Dead. He called me over to his house and she was dead…and then she wasn't dead. She…got up. I ran from the house. A few hours later he called me and told me to meet him at the mall. I was worried for him and knew it was stupid to come because the area had been evacuated, but I came. When I got here, he was high and dangerous."

"Where is your car?"

"Truck."

"Truck, then?"

"Parked on the moon, but I can go and get it if you want. Where do you think it's parked? And here's a question: What are you doing barricaded in here? If you're a cop, then shouldn't you be somewhere?"

I had made it a point when I worked at the mall to never know anyone by name, just by face. I had seen Vaughn a few times but never Mr. Giant. "I deserted," I told Vaughn. I walked into the security cage and gathered my supplies. It was almost five.

"So has everyone else," Vaughn told me. "I recognize you. You use to work here as a security guard. Cute, but too quiet."

"Sorry to disappoint you."

"What are you doing?"

"I needed a place to rest for the night. This mall was convenient. Now, Nancy Drew, I am moving on toward the mountains."

"I saw a dead…thing…outside. You're work?"

I didn't take credit. Instead I said: "Head, dead. Know that, it'll keep you alive. And don't let them get close. A bite, even a scratch, can cause you to become infected. And then you die, and come back as one of them."

"How do you know that?"

"I just do." I began walking toward the security office door. Vaughn jumped off the desk and ran to me. "What?"

"Are you going to just leave me?"

"I'll walk you safely to you truck."

"A real gentleman."

"Better than grizzly man high on dope."

Vaughn threw a disgusted look at me. "And where are you going? Just in case you haven't noticed, the dead are walking the earth and we're its food."

"You need to get to a rescue station." I knew those words meant nothing and felt ashamed to speak them, but the last thing I needed or wanted was to have to baby sit some woman. I wanted to move alone.

" A rescue station?" Vaughn scoffed, "don't you mean a 'death station'?" Vaughn walked out of the security office. I followed. "Everybody is running. To be honest, I came to the mall because it felt safe to me." Vaughn walked to the food court and grabbed a seat at the middle table. "I'm staying right here. There's really no place to go, now is there?"

I studied the empty mall. I felt like I was in an empty tomb all of a sudden. "If you stay here, make sure you know how to get to the security cage and lock the security office door if you need to."

I tossed down the keys to the security cage onto the table. Vaughn studied the keys. "He'll die out there. Something will get him."

"Tough end. Well, take care."

"I would go after him, but he's so high…he loved his wife, and when he saw her…come back…I saw his eyes. He…went insane. It became real to him. His wife had been sick…she shot herself in the chest. Anyway, I think it's better to leave him be."

"We're not perfect," I told her. "I've done a lot of things I regret. It's not your fault his wife is dead and he lost his the screws that held him together." I told Vaughn understanding what was on her mind.

"She knew he was cheating on her. I just…found it exciting."

I took a deep breath and settled myself in a chair across from Vaughn. "Look, we all do things we regret in this life, and there is nothing we can do to change what we have done. All we can do is learn and become better than what we were."

"What did you do that was so wrong?"

"Well, I deserted my oath. That's bad enough. But I just saw a man run out into a danger zone high as a kite, and he could get hurt or hurt a living being. I should have stopped him and threw him into the security cage. I didn't, though."

"Don't feel bad. I wanted him to leave. I hated him in the end, but felt guilty. I came here because of his wife. I figured I owed it to her. I didn't know he would be high and dangerous."

I looked around the mall. "Look, I'm going into the mountains. I have a cabin there. You're welcome to come."

Vaughn looked at me. "Are you married?"

"Do you see a wedding band?"

"No, but I'm not some ugly chick. I'm damn sexy and you're acting like you're married. And I know you're not gay. You haven't once looked at my breast or held steady eye contact with me. Respectful."

"My wife committed suicide two years ago."

"Oh, I'm--"

I jumped to my feet. Out of the corner I saw movement. As I turned I saw a the big man walking toward us holding his left hand over the right side of his neck. Bright, red, fresh blood was pouring out between his fingers. "Shit, he got bite," I said. "Get behind me." I raised my rifle and took aim.

"What are you doing?" Vaughn screamed at me. "He isn't dead, yet."

"But he will be." I had the big man in my sights. How he got back in was a wonder to me. The big man was just looking around as he walked toward Vaughn and myself. "He doesn't even know what world he's in…or does he?" I asked myself. I worried that he was faking his vagueness and would suddenly attack as soon as he got close enough. He wasn't calling out for help.

Vaughn ran to him. "No," I yelled. I reached out for Vaughn but she jerked free from my grip. I re-took my aim. I waited.

Vaughn ran to the big man. "John!"

John paused and looked at her. "Vaughn?"

"Yes. We need to get you some help. What happened?"

"Someone bit me." And then, before Vaughn could react, John grabbed her and snapped her neck. Vaughn fell dead immediately. Her body dropped like a tired rag doll.

I squeezed the trigger on my rifle. John's head jerked back on his shoulders as his brains left his skull. He feel backwards and lay still. "Romeo and Juliet," I told myself. "Only in sin." I spit. The sound of Vaughn's neck breaking vibrated in my mouth, causing a sour taste. "Time to go."

I gathered my supplies and turned to leave, but paused. "He got back in…she left the door unlocked. A zombie got at him…but where outside? Need to be careful."

And as soon as I said that, I heard the sound of wet, squeaking tennis shoes in the distance, walking slowly. I caught the zombie at the main entrance. A male, around twenty. I put a bullet in his brain and left the mall. I knew Vaughn left the keys in her truck; instinct. And I knew by the time I was pulling away in Vaughn's black Chevy truck, she was waking up from death…hungry. I didn't look back. I felt as though I needed to be on foot but knew I could ride for a little while. Daylight was breaking and a light snow was falling. I turned on the radio and listened to the crap that was being said.

Man: "So you're telling me the dead will eat the living?"

Woman, more calm than the man: "I am telling you we are food to them, yes."

Man: "Well, an educated doctor like yourself should know better than to--"

Woman: "An educated doctor like myself has saw the dead wake up in front of her and attack the living. I saw one of those things take a large bite out of someone's arm. I am educated enough to know what they are."

Man: "And what are they, Doctor?"

Woman: "A virus that has infected the human body causing the body to reanimate after it has expired, returning back to life with homicidal and cannibalistic tendencies."

Man (laughing) "So does every other idiot out there running scared, doctor. So does every other idiot. Why can't you just admit hell has flooded into the earth."

I turned off the radio. "Just keep thinking that, pal. Just keep thinking that. And when you shit your pants when you see one of them, then you can join the class of us idiots."

I drove into the morning. I was hungry but couldn't eat. Instead, I broke a vow and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and lit one. I inhaled deeply and coughed and drove into the dead dawn.

2

I didn't know what kind of virus could make a dead body reanimate, get up, and attack the living. Some kind of governmental bullshit, I guessed. Somewhere, in some secret lad, some scientist created a virus that was probably meant to be used on some foreign enemy. Instead, he or she fumbled something and the virus somehow went airborne and began it's reign of terror. Yeah, sure, that was it, right? Sure, it had to be. I mean, the dead just can't wake back up and begin walking around and eating the living. There was no way…right? I mean, hell didn't flood into the earth. It has to be a virus because when you got bit or even scratched by a zombie, you died and came back as one of them. It had to be a virus of some manner and that's all there was to it. I reassured myself of this as I drove through the cold and snowy morning out of town. I felt unsecured in the truck--if I was moving on wheels, then I could be seen both my the living and the dead, and that made me a target. I had this feeling even in my own truck. But the mountains were a ways off and I needed make as many miles as I possibly could before my caution made go to my feet again.

I stopped eighty-miles out of town on a rural back road. I counted my blessings I had made it the eight miles without nay problems or conflict. Maybe I could just go all the way to the cabin in the truck. Maybe I was just being over paranoid and cautious. I was on a back road and the sense of danger seemed far behind me. Even the snow had stopped falling. I wasn't certain, yet, though. I climbed out of the truck and walked to the rusted iron fence across the road. Beyond the fence lay a small graveyard with about thirty graves in it. I didn't know why I stopped at a graveyard of all places. Only, I did know why I stopped. My dad was buried in the graveyard, near the back under a large Oak Tree. I wanted to pay my respects.

I made my way into the graveyard, not worrying if a zombie was around. I knew I was alone. When I reached my dad's grave, I put my rifle on the snow covered ground and kneeled down beside the his grave. "Well, dad, it seems like hell has come to the earth. Uh…the dead are up and walking around and attacking the living. Just their bodies though, their souls are else where. Their empty shells, but deadly dangerous." I paused. I read my dad's headstone. "I'm glad God took you on before you could see this. It's really horrible." I felt a tear in my eye. I read my mother's inscription. My mother had died one year after my dad died. They lay resting together. "Mom, I'm so grateful you're not here most of all." I wiped my tear away. "I…deserted my oath. I'm running to the cabin for safety. I feel like a coward, but…chaos is everywhere and I don't think I can do much for anyone." A sound. I jerked. A squirrel. I relaxed. "Well, I need to get onto the cabin and get things settled there. I…come back and visit when it's all over."

The woods were silent, serene and beautiful. I was actually looking forward to reaching the cabin and holding up there. I would fish and hunt and make the bob shelter home for a while. I would make it through. I was safe and extremely lucky. Lucky? But what about everyone else? The children? The old? The sick?

"I'll see you guys soon," I told my parents.

I walked back to the truck, jumped in, and turned around, heading back toward all the chaos. I had was a cop, and somewhere, I was needed. How could I run scared when there were children in danger, old women and men in danger, pregnant women in danger, cripples in danger, mentally handicaps in danger--the innocent in danger. I wasn't Superman, but I had to do my part or I would never forgive myself. And I was scared. I was terrified. But when fear was used with careful potential, it could keep you alive and strong.

"Maybe it is just a virus, or maybe hell did flood into the earth like that crazy old preacher said, but whatever it is, we have to fight it," I told myself. I could still hear Vaughn's neck breaking. I could see her face. "We always had to protect ourselves from the living, and now the dead…serve and protect. What a way to die."