Disclaimer: (Herbal) Osaka-neechan does not own Saiyuki.
Author: (Herbal) Osaka-neechan
Content warning: Saiyuki... just, Saiyuki... yeah.. ››;;
Storyline warning: Dumbass of that-empty-corner-of-Osaka-nee's-mind poportions, stupid perversion that makes the plot?-what-plot of the piece
Summary: Goku has the sudden fear that he is becoming a Gojyo. Oh, my.
Point of view: Narrative
Perspective: Third person (The few that are of Osaka-nee's..)
The conceptual corner: Why was Osaka-neechan's first Saiyuki fanfiction (a lack of) humor? Nearly two years ago when this was first published, she was trying to think of a b-day piece for her friend Linlin for a few days, when voila, another mind-numbing period of German made things happen. Numbing things make you, reader, trip over yourself constantly when ripping the big toe off. Amongst other thing..
The crackpot corner: "Goku ate Gojyo's bananas." "...You like the fact my diaphram chokes on glue every time you say things like that, don't you Hakkai?"
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GREEN-FOOTED ORANGE BOOBY BIRDS
Short
Happy Puberty Day!! (The Belated Happy of Proportions!!)
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It began as a typical day where Sanzo-ikkou settled down in an inn for the while. The sun was shining, the sky was blue, the gun was shot (much), the dumbasses were yelling (at each other), Hakkai apologizing (to the floor), and a whole town would, once again, all become lesbian nymphomaniacs four reincarnated lives from then for the experience..
At the current moment, however, life of Sanzo-ikkou was relatively calm. If Sanzo could just tune out the noises Goku and Gojyo made while disgustingly pigging out... life would be calm. He could grind that through his teeth at least. Lfe was totally calm.
—Until Goku screamed.
Sanzo aimed the bullet to the head.
Fuck. Missed again.
The moment Goku screamed, Hakkai rushed over from the bed, leaning over to look at a trembling Goku, who was currently clinging onto Sanzo's robe (Sanzo trying to pry the monkey off in vain).
"Goku, what's wrong?" asked Hakkai, with an expression that said he didn't know whether he should smile or look concerned. That happened... much.
Goku was pointing a trembling finger to two accused objects of the same, on the table he had been sitting in front of, previously eating the food he and Gojyo had raided from the kitchens.
Gojyo still sat there, next to the now empty chair, holding the egg roll he and the monkey had been fighting over. He just blinked dumbly.
"Goddammit, what the hell are you shitting about now, you stupid saru?!" Sanzo practically snarled, managing to yank Goku off his robes, and sending him bouncing on the floor.
Goku pouted, rubbing his sore butt.
"I don't want to be a Gojyo!!" he exclaimed expressively, arms flapping up and down.
Silence..
Sanzo... scowled. (Much.)
"Stupid saru!!" was all he could spit out. Honestly, sometimes he couldn't even think straight with Goku's half-assed stupidity!
Hakkai was now puzzling over the two accused objects of the same, on the table.
"Goku, I don't see how—" he started.
"I do." All eyes turned to Gojyo, who was also now staring at the two accused objects of the same.
"See..." he started explaining, pointing from one accused object to another.
"If THIS orange goes next to THAT orange, it makes boobies."
Silence.
Deathly silence.
Even more deathly silence.
Then gunshots.
Several, loud, gunshots.
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END
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The reception corner: Study hall also rips off your toe. Or something..
Trying to make a letter "B" with two oranges with green tips on them, set together for the circles, is a mistake, okay?! A MISTAKE.
Are you suffocating?? oO;;
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