Author's note: In my head, Jareth and Jeremy are both played by Johnny Depp, and Sarah and Linda are both played by Anne Hathaway, not that it matters too much who plays the parts. I just think it's better if Jareth/Jeremy and Sarah/Linda are played by the same actor and actress. It makes this scene oh so much more awesome.
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Chapter One: "I do"
The bride and groom stood together at the front of the vast room, holding hands, looking deeply into each other's eyes. Her dark brown hair was pulled up and away from her face, laced with white flowers and silver ribbons. His blond hair sparkled in the sunlight as he stared down into her wide gray eyes. Her long, elegant white dress had lace cap sleeves and a layer of flowery lace over fine white satin that cascaded from a seem just under her bust all the way down her form and trailed out behind her. His dark suit gleamed in contrast and beautifully set off his pale skin tone.
"Do you," the marriage commissioner had finally come to the end of her long speech, "Jeremy Smith, hereby take Linda Williams to be your lawfully wedded wife?"
"I do." Jeremy answered solemnly, squeezing Linda's hand.
"And do you," the marriage commissioner's voice rolled on, "Linda Williams, hereby take Jeremy Smith to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
Linda swallowed to keep her voice from breaking, "I do."
"The couple will now exchange rings."
"Jareth!" Sarah hissed from her front-row seat, "put that away!"
"It's not making any noise!" Jareth hissed back, snuffing the crystal into nonexistence as if it were a candle flame.
"Shh! This is important!" She glared at him briefly before turning back to her mother's wedding.
"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride."
The room cheered. Sarah sighed. Jareth slumped. Then the piano kicked into a reprisal of the wedding march and the happy couple marched back down the aisle to all manner of applause and cheering. Sarah grabbed Jareth's arm and followed everyone else through the doors on the side of the chapel into the large dining room and took their places at the head table. Sarah's father, his wife, and Sarah's little half-brother Toby managed to shuffle their way over first.
Just as Sarah and Jareth were seated, Jeremy's sister, Tiffany, pressed her way through the milling throng, dragging a small boy by the elbow. "No, Brian!" She stated firmly for what sounded like the fourth time, "we are not going home!" When they reached the table, Tiffany picked Brian up and tried to cuddle him, but he only squirmed and wailed in her grip.
Jareth stood. "May I?"
"If you think you can get him to shut up!" Tiffany gave him a desperate look and handed the child over, before plopping down into a chair.
"Here, Brian. How about this?" He held the boy upside down by his feet.
At first, Brian only screamed louder. Then Jareth began to sway the boy gently side to side, and Brian gradually stopped screaming and started trying to look up at Jareth.
The Goblin King smiled and carefully flipped the child over so that he was right-side-up again. "There, now. Feel better?"
Brian stared at the Goblin King's mismatched eyes. He was wearing a very normal-looking gray dress suit with a navy tie and black dress shoes. His hair, however, was just as blond as it always was, and just as crazy. Brian reached out and grabbed a long strand of yellow hair, and pulled.
"Ow!" Jareth's face contorted momentarily. "Let go, Brian," he was working hard to keep from shouting at the child.
"Here," Sarah stood up then and gently, but firmly disentangled Brian's hand from Jareth's hair. "Hey, Brian." She smiled at the baby and then made a face.
Brian giggled.
Then the room erupted into cheering and Jareth and Sarah watched Brian's face crumple into a frown that was about to become more screaming, until Jeremy swept onto the scene and easily lifted the baby from Jareth's arms, twirling him around. Within seconds, Brian's bell-like laughter was dancing through the air.
"Oh, he's so good with children," Sarah heard her mother's voice sighing wistfully.
"Mom!" She turned and gave her mother an enormous hug. "Oh, you guys are so perfect together! And your dress is gorgeous!" Sarah herself was wearing a sparkling dark blue spaghetti strap evening gown.
"Thank you, sweetheart!" Linda released her daughter and turned to the man standing next to her, "and you must be the ever-elusive Jareth! I've heard so much about you."
The Goblin King cleared his throat. "Uh, yes, congratulations." He stuck out his hand, but Linda wrapped him into a hug he could not escape.
"Sarah!" Jeremy returned to her side of the table, having deposited Brian into his mother's lap. "It's so good to see you!" He hugged her hard and then turned to Jareth just as Linda let him go. "And you must be Jareth! Pleased to meet you. So glad you could make it! I know spring is a busy time for accountants."
"Uh, yes." Jareth shook Jeremy's hand firmly despite the confusion leaping within him. "But this is a big occasion." He smiled politely.
"Pf, I don't know about big." Jeremy waved an arm out at the guests, some of whom were still finding their seats. "It's barely a hundred people all together."
"Our original list was 300 strong." Linda winked and tugged on her husband's sleeve to get him to sit down with her.
Jareth and Sarah also sat down. Polite conversation continued throughout dinner, interrupted once or twice by the occasional speech and several times by either a squalling Brian or a dreadfully bored and mischievous Toby, who had just celebrated his fourth birthday a few weeks prior to the wedding. Every now and then, Sarah would catch Jareth trying to sneak a peek at a crystal he was holding under the table and she would elbow him in the ribs or kick him in the shin to get him to stop.
At length, the food was consumed and the music began to play. After Linda and Jeremy had spun and swayed in the traditional first dances, Jareth and Sarah joined them on the dance floor with a number of other couples, taking their turns to dance with the bride and groom.
"You seem tense," Sarah noted as she swayed in Jareth's arms.
"Hm? Oh, it's just the city." He grumbled.
"Will you please stop thinking about that for more than two seconds?" Sarah demanded wearily. "This is my mother's wedding!"
"I know. I'm sorry." Jareth fell silent for a moment, thinking about the ceremony and the many conversations he'd listened to and participated in. "You told them I was an accountant?"
"Yes." Sarah grinned. "For some big advertising corporation."
Jareth raised an eyebrow. "An accountant?"
"Well I couldn't very well tell them you were King of the Goblins, could I?"
"You could at least have said I was the king of something." Jareth griped.
"Well, you're the king of numbers." Sarah told him with a grin.
Jareth glared at her and Sarah's smile faded.
"Sorry." She muttered. "It was just a joke."
Jareth sighed and frowned at the air above Sarah's head.
"Don't worry." She insisted softly, "it's the labyrinth. What could possibly happen that you would need to be there for?"
Jareth gave her an unbelieving look. "Oh, I don't know. The bog of eternal stench could explode. The fireys could start wreaking havoc among the rubbish people. The labyrinth could decide we've been gone too long and send an earthquake to destroy the city."
Sarah rolled her eyes at him. "Stop being so dramatic."
"Alright," the Goblin King gave in with a shrug, "but if the city's in ruins when we get back, I'm blaming you."