Why Final Fantasy Never made it as TV Stars
"Sailor Materia"
By Yuffie Valentine
A new series I am starting with the cast placed in different TV series. This one makes fun of Sailor Moon.
The evil Sephirite (Sephiroth) watched over his victim. Cid tried in vain to remove the whip of the revolting female creature sent by the NegaShinra.
"Ahh, &*^% is *^%$ sucking my *&%&* energy!" Cid yelled.
"Ha ha ha! Stupid human, give up your fight and give your energy to me." Slutiva, the evil being with a really revealing outfit (like every bad girl on Sailor Moon).
"STOP RIGHT THERE SHINRA SCUM!" A voice yelled out.
"Oh no, not you!" Slutiva yelled out.
"That's right. I am the champion of ninjas. The defender of Mako. On behalf of Wutai I will punish you and steal your materia. I AM SAILOR MATERIA!" Yuffie moved her hands around in a pointless fashion.
"YOU WILL NEVER BEAT ME!" Slutiva yelled back.
"I am not alone in my fight." Yuffie said. "Sailor Summons!"
Four figures in the shadows appeared.
"I am Sailor Ifrit. The god of fire shall send you to meet your maker." Tifa made a cute pose and winks.
"I am Sailor Alexander. With the power of the being that is Holy, you will be defeated." Aeris winked and gave a smile.
"I am Sailor Ramuh! I will fight for what's right and pure in the name of the divinity of lighting." Selphie held up her fist.
"I am Sailor Bahumat. I shall right the wrongs of evil with the dragon idol." Quistis yelled. Then blew a kiss.
(Note: For anyone not to well known with Sailor Moon. Tifa=Mars, Aeris=Mercury, Selphie=Jupiter, and Quistis=Venus)
"Oh so the little girls want to play, give it your best shot!" Slutiva yelled.
"I'll take a shot at her!" Quistis said. She pointed her two fingers to the sky where a light dragon showed up. She then pointed the light at the villain. " BAHAMUT BEAM SMASH!" The dragon took off into Slutiva. But it only cut the monster in two, where it grew back. Now there was two Slutivas.
"Oh no, she isn't getting away with that!" Selphie yelled. She jumped up into the air where a small lighting rod came out of her tiara. Lighting began to gather at it. "RAMUH LIGHTING CRASH!" The light god appeared above her head and sent a blast of electricity into the monsters. They both feel to their knees.
"I say we team up Sailor Alexander!" Tifa said.
"Right on!" Aeris said. She started to spin around where bubbles gathered around her. At the same time Tifa had here hands pointed like a gun. At the tip of her fingers a fireball was charging.
"ALEXANDER BUBBLES BLAST!" Aeris let the stream of bubbles fly.
"IFRIT FIRE CHARGE!" Tifa's fire beam moved into the middle on the bubbles. They knocked down the two monsters. " Sailor Materia, use your wand."
"You got it!" Yuffie began to take out her wand. "Wait, one minute!" Yuffie ran over to the monsters that were just barely hanging on to life. She picked off any thing that looked expensive. The she walked over to Cid and did the same.
"Hey, give me my stuff back!" Cid yelled. He tried to get up, but too much of his energy was sucked.
"Okay then." Yuffie held up a wand that had Leviathan in the shape of a crescent moon on the top. "MATERIA SPIRAL WATER DRAGON ATTACK!" Yuffie twirled in the air for a few minutes before the mighty dragon crushed the creatures with its helix wave. They screamed out and turned into dust.
"Hmm, great job Sailor Materia. And the Summon Scouts. But can you handle my power?" Sephirite said. He held up his hand to gather a power ball. But a rose shot it down.
"Can it be? Tuxedo Vampire?" Sailor Yuffie looked up to see a dark figure. (which is Vincent in a tuxedo and a top hat ***drool***)
"Sailor Materia!" Vincent said, "Use the imperial silver materia!"
"Sure will!" Yuffie said. She held up the materia!
"Oh hell no, how stupid do I look. You think I am just going to stand here?" Sephirite disappeared.
"Well, He's gone for now!" Yuffie said. Vincent landed beside her.
"Well Done Sailor Yuffie!" Vincent said. He grabbed Yuffie and gave her a deep kiss!
"How come she gets the guys." Selphie whined.
"Cause she is the author's favorite." Quistis said. She pouted.
"The author better give us what we want before I shove my tranforming pen up her as......" Before Tifa could finish, magical power zapped Cloud, Zack, Squall, and Irvine there.
"THANK YOU YUFFIE VALENTINE!" The girls shouted out.
Fin
Well, this is just the first in a bunch of short stories I am writing with Final Fantasy characters as Tv people. Hope you enjoyed.
Next time: Uncle Cid's Cartoon Neighborhood