Hi,
Alright, here is the sequel to "Don't Be Afraid". If you haven't read my
story till now, you should do it at first.
A very special Thank You to my Beta Reader Leigh :-)) I know that I give you
a lot of work to do with my stories and I'm so thankful that you help me
with this!
Disclaimer: Every time the same: I don't own Tess und Andrew. They both
belongs to Martha Williamson. The rest of the characters are my own
Seek And You Shall Find
It was now almost nine months ago that Jennifer had met the sweet, kind Angel of Death named Andrew at the beach. Then, she thought that she only would have three months to live and was scared and depressed about it. He helped her to find hope and the joy of life again and to lose the fear of death. She was so happy that God had sent her Andrew then. Jennifer counted Andrew as one of her best friends now. In the last months, she tried to finish every task, like she promised. She let God be a part of her life and enjoyed every single day that He gave her.
Jennifer had had a hard day and was tired as she came home. Her headaches had gotten more intense during the last 5 days. Her doctor told her that it was due to the tumor which had grown. Jennifer could feel that her time was growing short and it wouldn't be long anymore till she would see her friend again. But, there was still one last thing she needed to finish before she could leave this world.
It was late when Jennifer walked into her bedroom. After she got into her bed, she started to pray, like she did every evening. "God? It's me, Jennifer. I'm thankful for the time that you gave me. I ... I know that there aren't many more days anymore for me, here on earth. I can feel it. But please, there is still something I need to finish before I can go and I'm afraid that I won't make it. Please, help me. You know that's important for me...."
Unseen to Jennifer, Andrew stood in the corner of the room. He listened to the prayer of his friend and smiled, because he was really proud of her. Andrew was wondering what it was that she needed to finish, because it seemed to be really important for her. Before he could ask, the Father told him that he should help Jennifer with it, but she had to tell him by herself what it was.
As Jennifer finished her prayer,wrapped the cover around her body and tried to sleep, but something was wrong. She had the feeling that someone else was in the room and observed her. She sat up and looked around the room, but she couldn't see anyone.
"I know that someone is here! Is that you Andrew?" she asked with a loud voice. Maybe it was her fantasy, but she was sure that someone was there.
"Yes, it's me," Andrew said and came out of the corner. He wore his light grey suit with a white shirt.
"Andrew!" Jennifer cried and run toward her friend. She hugged him as they met. "It's great to see you again."
"How are you doing?" he asked as she released him.
"I'm doing as well as I can. The headaches have gotten worse..." in this moment, she remembered *who* Andrew was and got a little bit more pale. "You aren't here only to visit me. Are you?" Jennifer asked with concern.
"No. I'm here to bring you home," he answered softly and before she could protest, he added with a gentle smile: "But I'm here early. You have still some time left."
Jennifer sighed, relieved. She needed still *some time*. "How much time do I have left?"
"I'm not sure about that, yet, but I think it's not more then a week." Andrew hated it to tell people something like this, especially if it was a friend like Jennifer. But the Father told him that she needed to know this.
Jennifer walked back to her bed, because she felt dizzy. Andrew caught her before she fell and helped her into the bed. "This happens often when I stay up too late, " Jennifer explained to him with a sad smile.
He smiled compassionately back at her. "Don't worry. It's okay. You need to sleep now," he said and covered her with the bedspread. He sat down at the edge of her bed and stroked a strand of hair out of her face. "We will talk tomorrow about everything."
Jennifer nodded weakly. It felt so safe to know that God had heard her prayer and sent one of His angels, even though it was the Angel of Death. Jennifer knew that Andrew would help her to finish the last thing that she needed to do.
Before Andrew left the room, he turned once around and saw that his friend already slept. When he came into the living room, he saw that Tess stood in the middle of the room.
"Tess! What are you doing here?" Andrew asked with curiousity. He didn't expect anyone else in the apartment, but he was glad to see her. Maybe she could answer some questions.
"Hello, Angel Boy. I heard that you need some help," Tess answered.
"Some answers would be a great start." Andrew walked over to his friend, with his hands in his pockets. "Do you know what it is that she needs help with? I heard her prayer and the Father told me that I should help her. But I don't know what it is."
"I don't know much either. But I know that I will work in with an organization that helps people to find family members. That's all I know, yet."
Andrew nodded and hoped that Jennifer would tell him the following day. "By the way ... Where is Monica?" he wanted to know.
"She won't be with us on this assignment, because she still has one of her own to finish." Tess listened to a voice, that only she could hear, before she added, "I have to go now, Monica needs me. We will see each other tomorrow at the organization's headquarters." She gave him the address and disappeared.
***
When Jennifer woke up, she could smell hot coffee, toast, and hot ham and eggs. It smelled really tasty. She stood up, put on her clothes and walked sleepily into the kitchen. It was only 6 o'clock and this was TOO early for her. "Good Morning! How are you doing?" The angel greeted her with a joyful voice.
"Morning," Jennifer muttered and walked over to the stove. "That smells great!"
Andrew was glad to see a smile on her face. "I hope you're hungry."
"Sure!" Jennifer answered when she started to set the table. "Usually, I only drink a coffee in the morning."
"A good breakfast is really important. You should take you that time," Andrew told her with a concerned look.
"I know. But it isn't the same if you are sitting alone here," she said and sat down.
Andrew brought the hot food and sat down, too. "But you know, that you are NEVER alone."
"Yes I know, but it's not the same."
While they ate, Andrew decided that it was time to get some answers. "Jennifer ... I know that you asked God, to give you enough time so that you can finish something. I heard your prayer yesterday. What is it that you wants to finish?" Andrew asked softly.
Jennifer sighed, "The last time, that I saw my father was when I was 17 years old. He never lived with my mother and me. My mom was a single parent for as long as I can remember. But from time to time, he visited us. And when I was 8 years old, we went camping for 3 weeks. That was the longest time that we had together. I never really missed him, because this was the way it was all my life. It was okay for me. Dad was someone who came from time to time to visit us for some hours or for a weekend. We drove somewhere to visit a zoo or anything else. They were really great days. Then, when I was 10 years old, he moved to another town, very far from us. I never did see him again. I always had gotten packets for my birthday or for Christmas from him, but he never called me or wrote me a letter. The years went by. It wasn't something that me bothered me too much. Later, when I was 18 years old and I still had to go to school, the timecame that he had to pay maintenance again. My mom was out of work and we hadn't enough money to let me go to school. My dad had work and enough money, but he lied and told us that he couldn't pay for me, even though the law said that he had to. Well, to make the story short, after many talks with him, he went to a lawyer and we had to get one, too. The whole thing went to court. I don't know why, maybe he had the better lawyer, the court decided that I was a lazy person and I should work to support myself instead of going to school. After that judgment, I had to go to the social welfare office. They gave me the money so that I could finish school. This was the last time that I heard anything from my father." Jennifer got tears in her eyes. The memories did still hurt even after so many years.
Andrew took her hand. "I'm really sorry to hear that you had to go through this. It must be hard to stand before a court against your own father."
Jennifer nodded, "Yeah, especially if you know that it shouldn't be necessary." Jennifer looked into his eyes. "Andrew, I need to find him! I tried to call him or to write him, but he doesn't seem to live there anymore. I think I have to work that out with him before I can go. I know, I swore then never to talk to him again, but ... I don't know, I only have the feeling that I shouldn't go before we've talked about this. Andrew, can you help me to find him? Please!" Jennifer begged.
Andrew smiled when he took Tess's card out of his pocket. "A friend of mine, her name is Tess, works with a company that helps people like you to find family members."
"That's wonderful! When can we go?" Jennifer's eyes beamed with joy and hope.
But Andrew stopped her from jumping up from the chair. "Wait! I don't want to let you down, but there is no guarantee that we will find him, at least in time."
His friend looked at him. She knew what he meant by that. Maybe she could die before she would find her dad. "Yeah, I know, but I have to try it. If I don't make it, I want to be able to say that I did try my best. And I swear to you that I will hang on as long I can!"
The angel smiled compassionately at her. It was amazing how much will to live she had developed during the last months, since he met her the first time. "Okay, I promise you that I will help you in every way I can."
One hour later, Andrew and Jennifer stood in the office of the organization that Andrew had told her about.
"Hi, I'm Tess! You must be Jennifer," said an older woman with dark skin and long black hair. She came over to them both. She and Andrew changed some glances and greeted each other silently.
"Yes, I am. Andrew told me that you could help me," Jennifer answered and then added, "at least, maybe."
"I hope so, Baby ... I hope so. Please, come with me into my office. There we can talk better. We will need some information from you, first." Tess led them toward a little room at the other side of the big room.
After Tess closed the door, Jennifer asked with a glance at Andrew, "Andrew said that you were friends. Are you an..."
"An Angel?" Tess asked with a big smile. Jennifer nodded. "Yes, Baby. I'm an angel too. I promise you that we will do our best to help you."
"I thank you for your help. Even if we don't find him."
"You should think more positively." Tess tried to cheer her up.
After all three sat down, Tess started, "Alright, we need some information about the person you are seeking. Everything and anything can help us." Tess took a sheet of paper. "Can you give me the name of your father, his last address, name of friends or any family member who could know something about him? Or anything else that you know about him?"
Jennifer could give her the name of her father and his last known address. Unfortunately, his last name was the kind of name that filled 5 pages in the telephone book. (LOL I love that line! Especially since my last name is so uncommon.) But she still knew what kind of job he had, he was a car mechanic then, and that his brother lived in that town, too.
"I'm sorry, that I can't give you more information, but this is all I know." Jennifer wished that she knew more that could help.
"It's alright Jennifer. I think that we have a good chance to find someone who could know what happened to your father. I know Georgeville and it isn't a big town."
Tess brought both of them to the door after she had all information that she needed. "I will let you know if I find something."
***
"And now?" Jennifer asked when they got out of the building.
"And now ... we will wait." Andrew looked at her and saw that she didn't like that idea. "If it's possibly to find him, then Tess WILL find him. Believe me. You could say ... 'she has special connections'" he added with a wink.
"I hate to wait. I wish I could do something," Jennifer replied sadly and walked back to her car.
"There is something, you can do..." Andrew began and continued when he saw her questioning look, "You can pray! Put it in God's hand and trust Him. He knows where your father is and He will tell us, if He thinks it's a good idea," Andrew said gently. He wish for her that they would find her father in time, but he knew that her time grew short, VERY short.
Jennifer gave him a thankful smile, "Yeah, sometimes, I still forget about that."
"Don't worry. Sometimes, angels forget, too." His smile changed to a concern look as he saw how pale Jennifer got within minutes. "What'ss wrong?" he asked worriedly and put his hand compassionately on her shoulder. "You don't look so good."
"Thanks for the compliment, I can't say the same about you," she joked, but then she got concerned, too, "My head ... it aches worse than before."
Andrew put his hand on her forehead. "You are glowing. Come on into the car, I will drive you to the hospital," he said and put her carefully into the car. (She's GLOWING? Since that's a term you use for the angels, perhaps you should change that to "sweating" or 'peerspiting' or 'warm' or 'burning up')
***
Andrew followed Jennifer into the Emergency Room. She had lost consciousness during the drive, but she revived as the doctors did some tests on her.
Andrew stood glowing next to her. He wore now that same suit that he had worn when he appeared in Jennifer's bedroom, the evening before.
"Where am I? What happened?" Jennifer asked weakly as she looked around the room until her eyes met Andrew's eyes.
The angel looked compassionately at her, "Your state got worse and I had to take you to a hospital. Do you remember, when we stood in front of your car, after we visited Tess?" he asked softly.
"Yeah. My head ached so much..." Jennifer stopped and shot a frightened glance at him.
Andrew nodded, he didn't have to be an angel to know what she was thinking, "Don't be afraid. You have still some time left. Just relax now and trust in Him. Put your life and your worry about your search in His hands. That's the v-e-r-y b-e-s-t p-l-a-c-e to be." Jennifer closed her eyes and relaxed as Andrew touched her cheek.
***
Three hours later:
Jennifer woke up again. Andrew sat on a chair at her left side.
"How long...," she started to ask and tried to sit up, but Andrew softly pushed her back on her pillow.
"Don't try to sit up!" He commanded her softly but with determination. He wouldn't have had to do that, because Jennifer's head started to ache again when she moved it, so she lay back voluntary. "You have been here for 3 hours."
"I don't have much time, have I?!"
Andrew took her hand in his own and shook firmly his head. "No, you haven't, but please ... don't give up."
Jennifer could see some tears in his eyes. He tried to hide them, but she still saw them. She closed her eyes and started to pray. She prayed that Tess would find her father just in time and she asked God to give Andrew and her the strength to go through this.
***
The next three days passed without any new information. Jennifer got weaker from day to day. Her headaches got so much worse that she was given morphine and slept most of the time. Tess visited her every day and told her and Andrew how the search was going. They found out that her father had moved back to his old town, 3 years ago. Unfortunately, that town was very much bigger than Georgeville and this meant that it was harder to find someone.
"Don't worry, Baby. Tess has still some options open." Tess did her best to cheer Jennifer up. "I have an idea, but I will need to wait until tomorrow, before I can try it. Can you promise me that you will hold on till then?" Tess asked with all her love and compassion.
Jennifer could only give her the weak answer, "I promise that I will try to hold on." It was hard for her to talk, because all the medication made her weaker than she was already.
Tess glanced at Andrew to tell him that she wanted to talk to him. And as he nodded, he laid a hand on Jennifer's shoulder, "I have to talk with Tess, but I will be right back, honey."
But she didn't hear his words because she already slept again.
***
"How long does she have?" asked Tess, when Andrew closed the door behind him.
"Not long," Andrew replied sadly. "The only thing that keeps her alive is the hope of finding her father." After a quick glance at the door, he added softly, "I wish she would let go, Tess. I see how hard it is for her to keep holding on, how painful and I know that she will lose that fight, soon."
"I know, Angel Boy." Tess pulled him into a big, loving hug when he started to cry. She knew that this was the hardest part of Andrew's job for him ... to stand there ... and watching someone slowly die, and she knew also that this broke her Angel Boy's heart. "I know. I promise you that I do my best to find him quickly."
***
When Jennifer opened her eyes, it was almost evening of the next day. A knock at the door caught her attention. It was Tess who came in the room with a very big smile. "I hope you are ready to meet someone!" she commented, then she invited someone else to come into the room.
Jennifer glanced at Andrew to see that he had also a joyful smile on his face. As she looked back at the door, there was a man of about the age of 50 years. He hadn't much hair left and the few that were left were gray.
"Jennifer?" he asked insecurely.
"Dad?" she couldn't believe that he was really her father, that Tess had found him.
"Yeah, it's me honey," he replied.
Tess prodded him softly toward the bed, "Go, talk with her!"
Andrew put his hand on Jennifer's hand, so that he would get her attention, "We will be waiting right outside, so that you two can talk." With this, Andrew and Tess left the room.
"Oh honey! I'm sooo sorry! I didn't know what you were going through."
"Yeah ... how scould you? The last time I heard from you was 7 years ago," she said, angrier than she had intended. Jennifer wanted to reconcile with her father, but when he started talking to her like he was never away, her old feelings of anger came back. It was more difficult than she expected to keep her feelings under control.
"I'm sorry, I don't want to get into a fight with you. That's not the reason why I wanted to find you."
"Please! Tess already told my WHY you wanted to see me and I think I owe you an answer," her father cut her off short as he saw how hard it was for her to talk.
For the next hour, he told her about his second wife, Mary. He said that she was very jealous of his past women and his children from them. She hated them because Mary and he couldn't have children of their own. He saw how it hurt her, when she saw him with HIS children. He knew that it wasn't okay, but he obeyed her wish and broke off all his connections with his past. Mary had a heart disease and he didn't want to excite her with any arguments.
"Jennifer, I ... I know that this isn't an excuse for what I did. I know I have abandoned you. I should have stuck by my opinion and stood by you, but I was such a coward. I can't undo that. It was an awful mistake." He started to cry. He felt terrible, because he had abandoned his own daughter. He knew that he would never forgive himself for this. "I can't expect you to forgive me, but please ... can you try it?"
Jennifer knew that she had only few minutes left as she saw Andrew appear in the room. He had that soft glow around him. Her father didn't see him.
"I ... I forgive you," she answered with an exhausted tone. "I love you, Dad."
"I love you so much, too. I wish I had come earlier."
"I had 7 years time to let go of my anger and hurt. Don't worry about me. I'm not angry at you anymore. You had to make a choice and sometimes ... sometimes people make the wrong choice. I'm sure that it seemed to you like the right choice then."
Then she turned her head over to Andrew, who stood at the other side of her bed. "Andrew, 'I have enjoyed my life, especially the last months and I finished every open task. I'm ready to discover a new country and a new life!'" she smiled at him as she repeated the exact words, that Andrew ahd said to her once at the beach. He had said then that he wanted her to be able to tell him this when her time came.
As Andrew recognized the words that he had told her once to cheer her up and to take her fear away, he smiled at her, "Yes honey, you have! I'm really proud of you and so is God! He is waiting for you, right now." Andrew stroked her cheek with his hand as she closed her eyes and died. "Let's start that journey!" he said softly.
Her father didn't know to whom his daughter was talking, but he cried when he recognized that she was gone.
Tess knew what happened and appeared in the room. "Martin?" she asked softly.
He didn't turn around, when he answered tearfully, "She is gone."
"Yes baby, I know."
Jennifer's father still didn't look at Tess. "It was too late," he sobbed "I wish I would have come earlier. What kind of father am I?"
"It wasn't too late," Tess said gently.
Martin turned around as he saw that the room got lighter. A beautiful light surrounded Tess.
"What ... What's going on? Who ARE you?" he asked, his voice full of fear.
"I'm an angel. I have been sent here, by God, to help you," the woman said with a compassionate smile. "Please, don't be afraid."
"No ... no ... I don't need an angel. My daughter needed an angel!" he yelled at her.
"Jennifer had her angel," a male voice came from behind him. It was Andrew, who also was glowing with that soft light. He walked over to Tess. "My name is Andrew and ... I was Jennifer's angel and friend. I was with her the last few days, and I was the one who brought her home to her heavenly Father."
Martin needed a moment to understand everything the two angels told him, before he said, "Why? Why is God so cruel?" he cried "At first He brings us two together again and in the next moment ... He takes her away again! What kind of God is that? Tell Him, I don't need Him!"
"First, God is a loving God, He hasn't taken something away from you," Tess stated. "He has given you a gift. Because He LOVES you and He loves Jennifer."
"How dare you say that?" he asked, angrily.
Now it was Andrew who spoke, "Mr. Connelly, your daughter was going to die and she knew it. Her last wish was that you both would get a chance to talk one last time, before she had to go. This was the only thing that kept her alive. And believe me when I say that it was the ONLY thing!" Andrew walked over to the man. "God had a gift for you two. The chance to talk about what happened in your past; to say 'Please forgive me'; to say 'I forgive you'; and to say 'I love you'. Not many people get this chance. I know that for sure!"
"Oh God, I'm soo sorry. I wish I had been there for her when she needed me. Please, forgive me."
"He has forgiven you, and so has Jennifer. But now, YOU need to forgive yourself, Baby." Tess embraced him. She held him for as long as he cried.
After she released him, she said softly, "Let Him help you! He wants so much to help you, but YOU have to make the first step. You need to forgive yourself ... that's the first step. Will you do this?"
He nodded, "I will."
"That's right, Baby. That's right," Tess said with a joyful smile.
Then, Jennifer's father looked at Andrew, "Did ... did she know about you?"
Andrew smiled, "Yes, she knew who I am. We met each other the first time 9 months ago. She is at peace now. She is in a wonderful place and she is really happy there!"
Martin managed to smile for a short moment. He could see that Andrew told the truth as he looked into the angel's eyes.
At this moment, a white dove appeared at the window.
The End
Alright, here is the sequel to "Don't Be Afraid". If you haven't read my
story till now, you should do it at first.
A very special Thank You to my Beta Reader Leigh :-)) I know that I give you
a lot of work to do with my stories and I'm so thankful that you help me
with this!
Disclaimer: Every time the same: I don't own Tess und Andrew. They both
belongs to Martha Williamson. The rest of the characters are my own
Seek And You Shall Find
It was now almost nine months ago that Jennifer had met the sweet, kind Angel of Death named Andrew at the beach. Then, she thought that she only would have three months to live and was scared and depressed about it. He helped her to find hope and the joy of life again and to lose the fear of death. She was so happy that God had sent her Andrew then. Jennifer counted Andrew as one of her best friends now. In the last months, she tried to finish every task, like she promised. She let God be a part of her life and enjoyed every single day that He gave her.
Jennifer had had a hard day and was tired as she came home. Her headaches had gotten more intense during the last 5 days. Her doctor told her that it was due to the tumor which had grown. Jennifer could feel that her time was growing short and it wouldn't be long anymore till she would see her friend again. But, there was still one last thing she needed to finish before she could leave this world.
It was late when Jennifer walked into her bedroom. After she got into her bed, she started to pray, like she did every evening. "God? It's me, Jennifer. I'm thankful for the time that you gave me. I ... I know that there aren't many more days anymore for me, here on earth. I can feel it. But please, there is still something I need to finish before I can go and I'm afraid that I won't make it. Please, help me. You know that's important for me...."
Unseen to Jennifer, Andrew stood in the corner of the room. He listened to the prayer of his friend and smiled, because he was really proud of her. Andrew was wondering what it was that she needed to finish, because it seemed to be really important for her. Before he could ask, the Father told him that he should help Jennifer with it, but she had to tell him by herself what it was.
As Jennifer finished her prayer,wrapped the cover around her body and tried to sleep, but something was wrong. She had the feeling that someone else was in the room and observed her. She sat up and looked around the room, but she couldn't see anyone.
"I know that someone is here! Is that you Andrew?" she asked with a loud voice. Maybe it was her fantasy, but she was sure that someone was there.
"Yes, it's me," Andrew said and came out of the corner. He wore his light grey suit with a white shirt.
"Andrew!" Jennifer cried and run toward her friend. She hugged him as they met. "It's great to see you again."
"How are you doing?" he asked as she released him.
"I'm doing as well as I can. The headaches have gotten worse..." in this moment, she remembered *who* Andrew was and got a little bit more pale. "You aren't here only to visit me. Are you?" Jennifer asked with concern.
"No. I'm here to bring you home," he answered softly and before she could protest, he added with a gentle smile: "But I'm here early. You have still some time left."
Jennifer sighed, relieved. She needed still *some time*. "How much time do I have left?"
"I'm not sure about that, yet, but I think it's not more then a week." Andrew hated it to tell people something like this, especially if it was a friend like Jennifer. But the Father told him that she needed to know this.
Jennifer walked back to her bed, because she felt dizzy. Andrew caught her before she fell and helped her into the bed. "This happens often when I stay up too late, " Jennifer explained to him with a sad smile.
He smiled compassionately back at her. "Don't worry. It's okay. You need to sleep now," he said and covered her with the bedspread. He sat down at the edge of her bed and stroked a strand of hair out of her face. "We will talk tomorrow about everything."
Jennifer nodded weakly. It felt so safe to know that God had heard her prayer and sent one of His angels, even though it was the Angel of Death. Jennifer knew that Andrew would help her to finish the last thing that she needed to do.
Before Andrew left the room, he turned once around and saw that his friend already slept. When he came into the living room, he saw that Tess stood in the middle of the room.
"Tess! What are you doing here?" Andrew asked with curiousity. He didn't expect anyone else in the apartment, but he was glad to see her. Maybe she could answer some questions.
"Hello, Angel Boy. I heard that you need some help," Tess answered.
"Some answers would be a great start." Andrew walked over to his friend, with his hands in his pockets. "Do you know what it is that she needs help with? I heard her prayer and the Father told me that I should help her. But I don't know what it is."
"I don't know much either. But I know that I will work in with an organization that helps people to find family members. That's all I know, yet."
Andrew nodded and hoped that Jennifer would tell him the following day. "By the way ... Where is Monica?" he wanted to know.
"She won't be with us on this assignment, because she still has one of her own to finish." Tess listened to a voice, that only she could hear, before she added, "I have to go now, Monica needs me. We will see each other tomorrow at the organization's headquarters." She gave him the address and disappeared.
***
When Jennifer woke up, she could smell hot coffee, toast, and hot ham and eggs. It smelled really tasty. She stood up, put on her clothes and walked sleepily into the kitchen. It was only 6 o'clock and this was TOO early for her. "Good Morning! How are you doing?" The angel greeted her with a joyful voice.
"Morning," Jennifer muttered and walked over to the stove. "That smells great!"
Andrew was glad to see a smile on her face. "I hope you're hungry."
"Sure!" Jennifer answered when she started to set the table. "Usually, I only drink a coffee in the morning."
"A good breakfast is really important. You should take you that time," Andrew told her with a concerned look.
"I know. But it isn't the same if you are sitting alone here," she said and sat down.
Andrew brought the hot food and sat down, too. "But you know, that you are NEVER alone."
"Yes I know, but it's not the same."
While they ate, Andrew decided that it was time to get some answers. "Jennifer ... I know that you asked God, to give you enough time so that you can finish something. I heard your prayer yesterday. What is it that you wants to finish?" Andrew asked softly.
Jennifer sighed, "The last time, that I saw my father was when I was 17 years old. He never lived with my mother and me. My mom was a single parent for as long as I can remember. But from time to time, he visited us. And when I was 8 years old, we went camping for 3 weeks. That was the longest time that we had together. I never really missed him, because this was the way it was all my life. It was okay for me. Dad was someone who came from time to time to visit us for some hours or for a weekend. We drove somewhere to visit a zoo or anything else. They were really great days. Then, when I was 10 years old, he moved to another town, very far from us. I never did see him again. I always had gotten packets for my birthday or for Christmas from him, but he never called me or wrote me a letter. The years went by. It wasn't something that me bothered me too much. Later, when I was 18 years old and I still had to go to school, the timecame that he had to pay maintenance again. My mom was out of work and we hadn't enough money to let me go to school. My dad had work and enough money, but he lied and told us that he couldn't pay for me, even though the law said that he had to. Well, to make the story short, after many talks with him, he went to a lawyer and we had to get one, too. The whole thing went to court. I don't know why, maybe he had the better lawyer, the court decided that I was a lazy person and I should work to support myself instead of going to school. After that judgment, I had to go to the social welfare office. They gave me the money so that I could finish school. This was the last time that I heard anything from my father." Jennifer got tears in her eyes. The memories did still hurt even after so many years.
Andrew took her hand. "I'm really sorry to hear that you had to go through this. It must be hard to stand before a court against your own father."
Jennifer nodded, "Yeah, especially if you know that it shouldn't be necessary." Jennifer looked into his eyes. "Andrew, I need to find him! I tried to call him or to write him, but he doesn't seem to live there anymore. I think I have to work that out with him before I can go. I know, I swore then never to talk to him again, but ... I don't know, I only have the feeling that I shouldn't go before we've talked about this. Andrew, can you help me to find him? Please!" Jennifer begged.
Andrew smiled when he took Tess's card out of his pocket. "A friend of mine, her name is Tess, works with a company that helps people like you to find family members."
"That's wonderful! When can we go?" Jennifer's eyes beamed with joy and hope.
But Andrew stopped her from jumping up from the chair. "Wait! I don't want to let you down, but there is no guarantee that we will find him, at least in time."
His friend looked at him. She knew what he meant by that. Maybe she could die before she would find her dad. "Yeah, I know, but I have to try it. If I don't make it, I want to be able to say that I did try my best. And I swear to you that I will hang on as long I can!"
The angel smiled compassionately at her. It was amazing how much will to live she had developed during the last months, since he met her the first time. "Okay, I promise you that I will help you in every way I can."
One hour later, Andrew and Jennifer stood in the office of the organization that Andrew had told her about.
"Hi, I'm Tess! You must be Jennifer," said an older woman with dark skin and long black hair. She came over to them both. She and Andrew changed some glances and greeted each other silently.
"Yes, I am. Andrew told me that you could help me," Jennifer answered and then added, "at least, maybe."
"I hope so, Baby ... I hope so. Please, come with me into my office. There we can talk better. We will need some information from you, first." Tess led them toward a little room at the other side of the big room.
After Tess closed the door, Jennifer asked with a glance at Andrew, "Andrew said that you were friends. Are you an..."
"An Angel?" Tess asked with a big smile. Jennifer nodded. "Yes, Baby. I'm an angel too. I promise you that we will do our best to help you."
"I thank you for your help. Even if we don't find him."
"You should think more positively." Tess tried to cheer her up.
After all three sat down, Tess started, "Alright, we need some information about the person you are seeking. Everything and anything can help us." Tess took a sheet of paper. "Can you give me the name of your father, his last address, name of friends or any family member who could know something about him? Or anything else that you know about him?"
Jennifer could give her the name of her father and his last known address. Unfortunately, his last name was the kind of name that filled 5 pages in the telephone book. (LOL I love that line! Especially since my last name is so uncommon.) But she still knew what kind of job he had, he was a car mechanic then, and that his brother lived in that town, too.
"I'm sorry, that I can't give you more information, but this is all I know." Jennifer wished that she knew more that could help.
"It's alright Jennifer. I think that we have a good chance to find someone who could know what happened to your father. I know Georgeville and it isn't a big town."
Tess brought both of them to the door after she had all information that she needed. "I will let you know if I find something."
***
"And now?" Jennifer asked when they got out of the building.
"And now ... we will wait." Andrew looked at her and saw that she didn't like that idea. "If it's possibly to find him, then Tess WILL find him. Believe me. You could say ... 'she has special connections'" he added with a wink.
"I hate to wait. I wish I could do something," Jennifer replied sadly and walked back to her car.
"There is something, you can do..." Andrew began and continued when he saw her questioning look, "You can pray! Put it in God's hand and trust Him. He knows where your father is and He will tell us, if He thinks it's a good idea," Andrew said gently. He wish for her that they would find her father in time, but he knew that her time grew short, VERY short.
Jennifer gave him a thankful smile, "Yeah, sometimes, I still forget about that."
"Don't worry. Sometimes, angels forget, too." His smile changed to a concern look as he saw how pale Jennifer got within minutes. "What'ss wrong?" he asked worriedly and put his hand compassionately on her shoulder. "You don't look so good."
"Thanks for the compliment, I can't say the same about you," she joked, but then she got concerned, too, "My head ... it aches worse than before."
Andrew put his hand on her forehead. "You are glowing. Come on into the car, I will drive you to the hospital," he said and put her carefully into the car. (She's GLOWING? Since that's a term you use for the angels, perhaps you should change that to "sweating" or 'peerspiting' or 'warm' or 'burning up')
***
Andrew followed Jennifer into the Emergency Room. She had lost consciousness during the drive, but she revived as the doctors did some tests on her.
Andrew stood glowing next to her. He wore now that same suit that he had worn when he appeared in Jennifer's bedroom, the evening before.
"Where am I? What happened?" Jennifer asked weakly as she looked around the room until her eyes met Andrew's eyes.
The angel looked compassionately at her, "Your state got worse and I had to take you to a hospital. Do you remember, when we stood in front of your car, after we visited Tess?" he asked softly.
"Yeah. My head ached so much..." Jennifer stopped and shot a frightened glance at him.
Andrew nodded, he didn't have to be an angel to know what she was thinking, "Don't be afraid. You have still some time left. Just relax now and trust in Him. Put your life and your worry about your search in His hands. That's the v-e-r-y b-e-s-t p-l-a-c-e to be." Jennifer closed her eyes and relaxed as Andrew touched her cheek.
***
Three hours later:
Jennifer woke up again. Andrew sat on a chair at her left side.
"How long...," she started to ask and tried to sit up, but Andrew softly pushed her back on her pillow.
"Don't try to sit up!" He commanded her softly but with determination. He wouldn't have had to do that, because Jennifer's head started to ache again when she moved it, so she lay back voluntary. "You have been here for 3 hours."
"I don't have much time, have I?!"
Andrew took her hand in his own and shook firmly his head. "No, you haven't, but please ... don't give up."
Jennifer could see some tears in his eyes. He tried to hide them, but she still saw them. She closed her eyes and started to pray. She prayed that Tess would find her father just in time and she asked God to give Andrew and her the strength to go through this.
***
The next three days passed without any new information. Jennifer got weaker from day to day. Her headaches got so much worse that she was given morphine and slept most of the time. Tess visited her every day and told her and Andrew how the search was going. They found out that her father had moved back to his old town, 3 years ago. Unfortunately, that town was very much bigger than Georgeville and this meant that it was harder to find someone.
"Don't worry, Baby. Tess has still some options open." Tess did her best to cheer Jennifer up. "I have an idea, but I will need to wait until tomorrow, before I can try it. Can you promise me that you will hold on till then?" Tess asked with all her love and compassion.
Jennifer could only give her the weak answer, "I promise that I will try to hold on." It was hard for her to talk, because all the medication made her weaker than she was already.
Tess glanced at Andrew to tell him that she wanted to talk to him. And as he nodded, he laid a hand on Jennifer's shoulder, "I have to talk with Tess, but I will be right back, honey."
But she didn't hear his words because she already slept again.
***
"How long does she have?" asked Tess, when Andrew closed the door behind him.
"Not long," Andrew replied sadly. "The only thing that keeps her alive is the hope of finding her father." After a quick glance at the door, he added softly, "I wish she would let go, Tess. I see how hard it is for her to keep holding on, how painful and I know that she will lose that fight, soon."
"I know, Angel Boy." Tess pulled him into a big, loving hug when he started to cry. She knew that this was the hardest part of Andrew's job for him ... to stand there ... and watching someone slowly die, and she knew also that this broke her Angel Boy's heart. "I know. I promise you that I do my best to find him quickly."
***
When Jennifer opened her eyes, it was almost evening of the next day. A knock at the door caught her attention. It was Tess who came in the room with a very big smile. "I hope you are ready to meet someone!" she commented, then she invited someone else to come into the room.
Jennifer glanced at Andrew to see that he had also a joyful smile on his face. As she looked back at the door, there was a man of about the age of 50 years. He hadn't much hair left and the few that were left were gray.
"Jennifer?" he asked insecurely.
"Dad?" she couldn't believe that he was really her father, that Tess had found him.
"Yeah, it's me honey," he replied.
Tess prodded him softly toward the bed, "Go, talk with her!"
Andrew put his hand on Jennifer's hand, so that he would get her attention, "We will be waiting right outside, so that you two can talk." With this, Andrew and Tess left the room.
"Oh honey! I'm sooo sorry! I didn't know what you were going through."
"Yeah ... how scould you? The last time I heard from you was 7 years ago," she said, angrier than she had intended. Jennifer wanted to reconcile with her father, but when he started talking to her like he was never away, her old feelings of anger came back. It was more difficult than she expected to keep her feelings under control.
"I'm sorry, I don't want to get into a fight with you. That's not the reason why I wanted to find you."
"Please! Tess already told my WHY you wanted to see me and I think I owe you an answer," her father cut her off short as he saw how hard it was for her to talk.
For the next hour, he told her about his second wife, Mary. He said that she was very jealous of his past women and his children from them. She hated them because Mary and he couldn't have children of their own. He saw how it hurt her, when she saw him with HIS children. He knew that it wasn't okay, but he obeyed her wish and broke off all his connections with his past. Mary had a heart disease and he didn't want to excite her with any arguments.
"Jennifer, I ... I know that this isn't an excuse for what I did. I know I have abandoned you. I should have stuck by my opinion and stood by you, but I was such a coward. I can't undo that. It was an awful mistake." He started to cry. He felt terrible, because he had abandoned his own daughter. He knew that he would never forgive himself for this. "I can't expect you to forgive me, but please ... can you try it?"
Jennifer knew that she had only few minutes left as she saw Andrew appear in the room. He had that soft glow around him. Her father didn't see him.
"I ... I forgive you," she answered with an exhausted tone. "I love you, Dad."
"I love you so much, too. I wish I had come earlier."
"I had 7 years time to let go of my anger and hurt. Don't worry about me. I'm not angry at you anymore. You had to make a choice and sometimes ... sometimes people make the wrong choice. I'm sure that it seemed to you like the right choice then."
Then she turned her head over to Andrew, who stood at the other side of her bed. "Andrew, 'I have enjoyed my life, especially the last months and I finished every open task. I'm ready to discover a new country and a new life!'" she smiled at him as she repeated the exact words, that Andrew ahd said to her once at the beach. He had said then that he wanted her to be able to tell him this when her time came.
As Andrew recognized the words that he had told her once to cheer her up and to take her fear away, he smiled at her, "Yes honey, you have! I'm really proud of you and so is God! He is waiting for you, right now." Andrew stroked her cheek with his hand as she closed her eyes and died. "Let's start that journey!" he said softly.
Her father didn't know to whom his daughter was talking, but he cried when he recognized that she was gone.
Tess knew what happened and appeared in the room. "Martin?" she asked softly.
He didn't turn around, when he answered tearfully, "She is gone."
"Yes baby, I know."
Jennifer's father still didn't look at Tess. "It was too late," he sobbed "I wish I would have come earlier. What kind of father am I?"
"It wasn't too late," Tess said gently.
Martin turned around as he saw that the room got lighter. A beautiful light surrounded Tess.
"What ... What's going on? Who ARE you?" he asked, his voice full of fear.
"I'm an angel. I have been sent here, by God, to help you," the woman said with a compassionate smile. "Please, don't be afraid."
"No ... no ... I don't need an angel. My daughter needed an angel!" he yelled at her.
"Jennifer had her angel," a male voice came from behind him. It was Andrew, who also was glowing with that soft light. He walked over to Tess. "My name is Andrew and ... I was Jennifer's angel and friend. I was with her the last few days, and I was the one who brought her home to her heavenly Father."
Martin needed a moment to understand everything the two angels told him, before he said, "Why? Why is God so cruel?" he cried "At first He brings us two together again and in the next moment ... He takes her away again! What kind of God is that? Tell Him, I don't need Him!"
"First, God is a loving God, He hasn't taken something away from you," Tess stated. "He has given you a gift. Because He LOVES you and He loves Jennifer."
"How dare you say that?" he asked, angrily.
Now it was Andrew who spoke, "Mr. Connelly, your daughter was going to die and she knew it. Her last wish was that you both would get a chance to talk one last time, before she had to go. This was the only thing that kept her alive. And believe me when I say that it was the ONLY thing!" Andrew walked over to the man. "God had a gift for you two. The chance to talk about what happened in your past; to say 'Please forgive me'; to say 'I forgive you'; and to say 'I love you'. Not many people get this chance. I know that for sure!"
"Oh God, I'm soo sorry. I wish I had been there for her when she needed me. Please, forgive me."
"He has forgiven you, and so has Jennifer. But now, YOU need to forgive yourself, Baby." Tess embraced him. She held him for as long as he cried.
After she released him, she said softly, "Let Him help you! He wants so much to help you, but YOU have to make the first step. You need to forgive yourself ... that's the first step. Will you do this?"
He nodded, "I will."
"That's right, Baby. That's right," Tess said with a joyful smile.
Then, Jennifer's father looked at Andrew, "Did ... did she know about you?"
Andrew smiled, "Yes, she knew who I am. We met each other the first time 9 months ago. She is at peace now. She is in a wonderful place and she is really happy there!"
Martin managed to smile for a short moment. He could see that Andrew told the truth as he looked into the angel's eyes.
At this moment, a white dove appeared at the window.
The End