Title: Bound by Love
Genres: Romance, family
Rating: Teen
Warning: Implied sexual content between Sirius and Remus
Disclaimer: Not my characters:
Summary: Sirius and Remus discuss the Black family, and the werewolf comforts his lover both verbally and physically.
The fireplace in the small flat the young canine couple had recently rented was burning merrily, but Sirius didn't look cheerful as he stared at it from his place on the couch next to his lover. Remus knew why: Today was Regulus' birthday.
"I know you'd never join Voldemort - never even consider it - but…do you ever regret leaving, Sirius? No one would blame you if you did. They were your family, after all." Remus is careful to use past tense when bringing up the relationship between Sirius and his blood.
"No. Yes. Urg! I mean…sometimes, I do feel regret, but it isn't for me leaving. I regret they're the way that they are; that I couldn't change them. I regret not being stronger. All of you say how proud you are of me 'cause I was strong enough to resist their urges to use Dark magic and leave them, but if I was really strong, then I could've saved them." He stares at the floor and adds softly, "Or at least saved Regulus."
Remus slides an arm around Sirius' shoulders and presses up against his side. He follows the comforting gesture with words of solace. "Don't blame yourself, Padfoot. Like you, like all of them, Regulus is a Black, and Blacks don't change for anyone. They're too stubborn and too proud to let someone else influence them. It's an unfortunate tragedy if the Black stubbornly goes in the wrong direction, just as it's a rare joy when the Black proudly goes in the right one."
Sirius knows Remus is striving to make him feel better. To a degree, it's working, for Remus' very presence provides Sirius with calming warmth which is both physical and emotional. However, the brunet desperately wishes for a change of subject, thus he smirks slyly and points out, "I let you influence me."
"Making you want to discard your trousers is not the sort of influence that I mean." Remus rolls his eyes, but Sirius sees the smile tugging at the corners of the werewolf's pretty mouth.
"Maybe not," Sirius agrees, placing the half-drunk tea Remus brought him on the table so he can encircle his arms around his lover's waist to pull him closer. "But it's the kind of influence I like."
"Dirty mutt," Remus scolds, still smiling. If the beam does not ruin the affect of the former Prefect's admonishment, his next actions certainly do. He tilts his head sideways to give Sirius better access when the animagus kisses his neck, and doesn't protest when Sirius gently pushes him down against the cushions.
Sirius is a man of action. Remus can imagine no worse torture for his partner than to lock him up and forbid him to leave or act. Because of this tendency, Remus perceives it is better to comfort Sirius physically instead of verbally, like he attempted to do earlier. He knows what Sirius needs, and is more than willing to give it to him.
"Moony," Sirius says with sudden urgency a few minutes later, stopping his task of unbuttoning Remus' shirt.
Remus eases his mouth off of Sirius' earlobe. "Padfoot?"
"I'm…I don't…I mean," he groans in frustration at his incoherency, "YOU are my family, all right? You, and James, and Wormtail. I guess even Prongs' parents and Lily, too. The Blacks are supposed to be my family. They're supposed to care about me for who I am. But…" He trails off and looks so forlorn it prompts the werewolf to cup his face in one of his hands.
"Sirius, it's okay; you don't have to-"
"I do," the animagus cuts him off. "I have to say this, Moony."
Remus nods in understanding; his stunning eyes stare up at his lover filled with attentiveness and affection. The caring display gives Sirius the feeling of security he needs to continue. He takes a breath and explains, "But they never did love me, and I s'pose it hurts that they didn't, but it doesn't hurt all that much because I've got all of you, who aren't supposed to love me, who have no obligation, and yet love me anyway. It makes my family different from other people's, but when have I ever been conventional? In fact, it's not just different, but it's better. It's better to be bound by love than to be bound by blood."
Remus smile lights up all of the Black places in Sirius's soul. "That it is, and I do love you."
"I know," answers Sirius truthfully. "There was never any doubt."
"Good; I was terribly concerned there was." Remus' sarcasm is gentle, though it still causes Sirius to playfully call him a 'prat.' "Well, this prat is wondering if you'd like to be bound by something more tangible than love or genetics."
Sirius cocks his head like a confused puppy. "Huh?"
"The restraints are in the drawer," Remus reminds him, eyes alight with mischief.
Sirius' heart skips a beat. "Moony, you are deplorable!" The mock aghast response is swiftly followed by: "But since you suggested it…"
They enjoy how leather bonds can be combined with those of love, feeling intimately connected in more ways than one.