It doesn't hurt me.

You wanna feel how it feels?

You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me?

You wanna hear about the deal I'm making?

You be running up that hill

You and me be running up that hill

And if I only could,

Make a deal with God,

And get him to swap our places,

Be running up that road,

Be running up that hill,

Be running up that building.

If I only could, oh...

You don't want to hurt me,

But see how deep the bullet lies.

Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.

There is thunder in our hearts, baby.

So much hate for the ones we love?

Tell me, we both matter, don't we?

You, be running up that hill

You and me, be running up that hill

You and me won't be unhappy.

And if I only could,

Make a deal with God,

And get him to swap our places,

Be running up that road,

Be running up that hill,

Be running up that building,

If I only could, oh...

'C'mon, baby, c'mon, c'mon, darling,

Let me steal this moment from you now.

C'mon, angel, c'mon, c'mon, darling,

Let's exchange the experience, oh...'

And if I only could,

Make a deal with God,

And get him to swap our places,

Be running up that road,

Be running up that hill,

With no problems

Running Up That Hill ~ Placebo

Do you want to know John? Really want to know what I am willing to do?

That is what he had asked.

Little did I know it was one of the last conversations we would have.

He always said he would burn the heart out of me. He understands it is so much more than that now. Don't you see John?

He always loves how Sherlock called him by his given name. He was the only one given that luxury, a place in his mind, permanently etched. That had to be the reason the madman had begun to go off.

Running through the city, their city the night before. Evading the Met, Lestrade, prison. Due to prejudice really; that and envy. Disdain. Jealousy. Alright, multiple reasons for them to be running. They had to finish as they began so off they went into the dark sprinting to some form of safety.

Then we ran right into Richard Brook. Fairy tale. Death author. Eater of souls. Spider.

You thought I didn't know about the early morning text.

You thought I didn't know Moriarty's mobile number.

I always told you I would protect you. From him, yourself, the world if necessary. You've never been weak; no. Your weakness has always been insatiable curiosity.

Do you remember that first night Sherlock? The pink lady and the pill and the choice? Even then my heart knew before my mind. Your's too, but in opposite order.

But wait, I'm getting ahead of myself...and behind.

I've been here before, he has as well, but all times accidental. Yes we ran toward danger but we knew deep down we'd pull out alive somehow. Not this time it seemed. Someone had to pay the blood-debt for the other to survive.

You've alway mattered John. To me.

Hearing that had made the difference. Hopefully the letter I've left you will do the same.
I'm just so very happy to have had this time with you if I don't survive this. You'll see it soon. It's placed on the workstation right beside your favored microscope.

Oh, Johnny-boy. You are the best pet aren't you? Willing to fly instead of your angel are you? You know he lost his wings ages ago, don't you? But you've never had them...and it is poetic is it not? Your fall from grace? After all he's given?

Sherlock, I pray this swap will be enough. I'm begging again, but this time for your life. Maybe mine will be just enough for yours. I pray it is.