Warning: Okay, I did it. I actually did it. :P I was pondering and thinking and... well! Here it is! I ACTUALLY DID IT! *cackles insanely*
I'm debating, however... whether or not I should halt all the other fics in favor of finishing this one first. ;P I wonder... would I get beaten up if I did?
Chapter One: Squabbles
Music blared, wildly, as a brilliant display of lasers and fireworks filled the air with bright colors and confetti. Thousands of Irkens chattered as they wandered through the beautifully decorated streets that was Festivopia. The small green aliens mingled and devoured the large supplies of free food, as well as depositing beautifully wrapped presents at the doorway to the main hall where the Tallest and his Council resided.
A tall Irken crossed her arms and watched her fellow aliens in their merry-making. Her bright gold eyes glittered as she sported an impressive uniform of armor, which was far more advanced than the shorter Irkens about her. Her quirked her antenni slightly as a gold band rested about them, precariously positioned like a hair band.
Many of the Irkens regarded her with awe, then continued on their way. She seemed far more interested, however, in her own thoughts.
"Hrn," she muttered. "Looks peaceful so far,"
She stretched, idly, before she craned her neck to peer at the main hall. A scowl crossed her face.
"But what were the Tallest thinking? Every time they conquer a planet, they rename it something utterly ridiculous. What kind of name is FESTIVOPIA? CONVENTIA? FOOD COURTIA? What ever happened to good, old fashioned names that didn't blatantly announce what that planet's purpose was? It's like they think Irkens need subtitles," she muttered, to no one in particular.
"Faaaaab! FAAAAAB!"
The tall Irken blinked and glanced around, then downward. A small Irken, atleast when compared to her, darted through the crowd towards her. He was about a foot taller than a majority of the crowd, with bright sky blue eyes and an enthusiastic smile. He wore the same uniform as all the other Irkens, though he definitely stood out due to his odd coloration.
The small Irken stared up, adoringly, at Fab.
"I was afraid I wouldn't find you!" the smaller Irken squeaked, as if such a thing were truly horrible. Fab tilted her head and smiled, slightly.
"How can you possibly miss me?" she grinned. "I don't exactly blend in, Rio,"
Rio paused, then blinked repeatedly. After a moment of confusion, Rio smiled brightly and shrugged.
"I still found you!" he repeated.
"Yeah," Fab smiled even wider. "Are you enjoying the party?"
"Uh huh! It's amazing!" Rio's eyes widened and sparkled, like two aquamarines. "The Tallest has such huge parties on their life anniversary!"
"Eh," Fab shrugged, lightly, "Some are larger than others. But since he's only been Tallest for several planet cycles, the Council decided to throw a large party to make him feel welcome,"
Rio blinked and tilted his head, curiously.
"You don't like him, Fab?" he asked, eyes still shimmering.
"...," Fab regarded Rio, then sighed and shook her head. "We... have issues,"
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"For the final time, it's OUT of the question!"
"Who do you think you are!? Do you know who I am!?"
"Yes, I do!" Fab growled, claws on her hips. "You're an idiot!"
"I'm the Tallest!" a tall Irken snarled, his orange eyes flaring with a challenge. He wore the orange, black, and grey robes of the Tallest and stood a good foot above Fab. Fab glared at him as the Irken drew himself up and puffed out his chest. "You're just the captain of my bodyguard! What makes you think you can tell me what I can and cannot do!?"
Fab's cheek twitched violently as her antenni arched forward in a display of irritation.
"Everyone knows that Jrak Minuc is a dangerous planet!" she hissed, her voice dripping with anger. "Everything on that jungle planet is alive... and very willing to eat you! Why, by IRK, would you want to go there for a break!?"
"It's not Jrak Minuc anymore," the other Irken snorted. "I've renamed it Resortia,"
"RESORTIA?!" Fab exploded.
"Resortia," the Irken responded. "Sounds rather interesting, don't ya think? And with the security that the flesh-eating vegetation provides, a guest can expect the utmost privacy!" he added, winking slyly.
"TALLEST... ORANGE...," Fab hissed, her claws twitching as if they were more than willing to wrap around the Irken's neck and strangle him. "The planet, though conquered, is still HOSTILE! The NATIVES may have surrendered... but the planet did NOT! It can't be made in to a RESORT PLANET!"
"SPECIAL... AGENT... FAB," Orange sneered, eyes sparking. "I wouldn't think YOU, of all people, would be frightened of a simple planet!"
Fab hissed, her eyes narrowing.
"Say that again,"
"Say what again?" Orange blinked, innocently. "That you're a coward?"
"Heh," Fab sneered. "This coming from an inexperienced moron who thinks that just because he's tall, all of his shortcomings disappear!"
"... What do you mean by that?" Orange growled.
"What kind of Tallest needs a bodyguard?" Fab purred, sweetly. "When are you going to grow up and take care of yourself?"
"... You act like you're my mother," Orange growled.
"If I were your mother, I'd have spanked your arrogant end long ago!" Fab snorted.
"Well, MOTHER, why don't you try and spank me now!?" Orange snapped.
A moment of silence feeled the room as the two glared at each other, antenni sparking dangerously. As their words echoed through the room, the two became vaguely aware that the other was blushing ever so slightly.
"...,"
"...,"
The silence grew very tense until both Irkens shifted, uncomfortably. Fab drew herself up and scowled.
"Waste product," Fab grunted, stepping back.
"Slaughtering ratperson vomit," Orange retorted, stepping back as well. The two continued to glare at eachother, then turned sharply on their heels and stormed out of the room through opposite doors.
Fab came to a stop and waited, out of sight, until the sound of Orange's footsteps grew distant and then silent. She scowled again, then massaged her forehead.
"Why won't he ever listen to me?" she sighed.
"Because he's young,"
Fab looked up, wearily.
"Greetings, Elder," she muttered. A tall Irken wearing soft pastel colored robes drifted towards Fab, smiling slightly. He looked older than her, but still in his prime. He nodded slightly, red eyes dancing with amusement.
"You knew I was here?" he asked.
"... If I didn't, how could I call myself captain of the Special Forces?" she replied, dully. "You definitely heard...?"
"You two get along rather well," the Elder grinned. Fab looked at the Elder as if he were insane. "And you have a lot in common. You're both stubborn and are used to having your way. You give the Council quite a lot of trouble," he added, disapprovingly.
"I have nothing in common with that ignorant...," Fab grunted.
"He's still your Tallest," the Elder warned, lightly. Fab looked at him.
"If he were going to do something, why hasn't he done anything by now?" Fab snarled. "We've been fighting ever since we first met! Even hundreds of cycles BEFORE he became Tallest!"
"I don't know," the Elder replied. "Maybe you should ask him yourself?"
Fab snorted and started heading down the hall.
"I don't want to talk to him any more than I have to," she snarled.
"Then why are you heading towards his quarters?" the Elder arched an invisible eyebrow. Fab halted and blinked, then blushed and turned about to head down the opposite direction.
"I wasn't," Fab replied. "I just thought that was the way you were going,"
"Of course,"