Snow Way Out Remake

by inswny03

This fanfiction is a remake of the episode Snow Way with some extra things added.

*It starts at The Loud House at a snowy weather on the outside. Inside the house, Leni turns on her dryer and points it to a pot of goulash, as her way of defrosting it.*

Leni: "Dinner's almost ready, guys!"

*The camera zooms out, showing the Loud siblings (except Ian,Lana and Lily) watching what Leni is doing.*

Lincoln: "Uh, Leni, what are you doing?"

Leni: "Defrosting the goulash Dad left us."

Lori: "Maybe you should try the stove."

Leni: "Good idea. I was worried this would give goulash split-ends, anyway."

Lana: "Forget the goulash! Mine and Ian's favorite racecar driver Bobbie Fletcher is holding a contest tonight at the Burpin' Burger!" *fantasy of Ian and Lana winning the wrapper appears.* "Whoever finds a burger with a tire mark wrapper gets to be an honorary member of her pit crew!"

Bobbie: *in Lana's imagination, opens the window of her car and the window of her racing helmet.* "I see you both got the winning wrapper! Welcome aboard, Ian and Lana!"

*Ian and Lana, in racing outfits, both hold a burger wrapper with tire tracks that reads WINNER. End fantasy with Ian and Lana in the same pose.*

Lana: "I know what you're gonna say. Mom and Dad left us plenty of food to eat while they're away for the weekend, but-"

*The horn on Vanzilla honks. Ian and Lana notice their siblings left and are now in the car.*

Lincoln: "You both had us at "Burpin' Burger"!"

Lana: *eagerly grabs her coat* "HOPS! JACKET JUMP!"

*Hops hops right into Lana's jacket and winks at Lana.*

Ian: "YOU TOO CHUCK!"

*Chuck hops right into Ian's coat and snuggles Ian's cheek*

Lana: *rushes out the door as Ian follows* "Whoo-hoo! Yeah!"

Lisa: "Siblings, I'd like to call your attention to the rapidly descending ice crystals, street name, snow!"

Lana: "Fine, Lis. You can stay here and eat the goulash."

Ian: "But don't say we didn't tell you."

Lisa: "I call shotgun!" *rushes in*

*Burpin' Burger. Lori parks Vanzilla and the kids get out to the promotion stand.*

Announcer: "Please welcome racing champion, Bobbie Fletcher!"

*Bobbie's car comes up onto the stage with the crowd cheering. She gets out and takes off her helmet.*

Lana: "Yes!"

Lola: "There she is!"

Ian: "The one and only!"

Bobbie: "Thanks for coming out, racing fans! I wanna give a huge thanks to my sponsor, Burpin' Burger. Let me tell ya, you can't get past the starting line without quality fuel, and mine is right here." [holds up a burger] "The Big Belcher with extra pickles." [takes a bite]

*The crowd cheers some more.*

Bobbie: "I can't wait to have one of you folks on my pit crew. All you gotta do is find the burger wrapper that looks just like this." *holds up the wrapper with tired tracks that reads WINNER* "Ladies and gentlemen, start your stomachs!" *waves the green flag*

*A horn blares and the crowd rushes into the restaurant, but Flip cuts right to the front.*

Ian: "Hey!"

Flip: "Give me a dozen burgers, and try to make one of them the winner!"

Employee: "A dozen? Wow. You must really want to be on that pit crew."

Flip: *sarcastic* "Oh, yeah. Bippity Fletchman, huge fan."

Employee: "Actually, her name is-"

Flip: "Don't care! Just gonna sell the winning wrapper to some sucker for big bucks."

*The employee brings him his burgers.*

Flip: "Come to Flippy!" *starts opening up his wrappers.*

Lana: *begging with her fingers crossed* "No wrapper, no wrapper, no wrapper."

Flip: "Dang it! All losers! Keep those burgers cookin', slim, 'cuz I'll be back for more once I scratch up some moolah." *leaves*

*The Loud Kids are next.*

Lana: "We'd like ten Big Belchers and one Baby Belcher, please."

Employee: "Okay, that'll be $25."

Lana: "Uh, don't worry, guys. We got this." *she and Ian rummages through their pockets and pick out a gross wad with a bunch of stuff stuck to it.* "Let's see. My gum collection...banana peel...owl's foot...ah, here it is." *gives the employee a coupon*

Employee: "Oh. One of our Kids Eat Free coupons. Great." *beat* "Wait. Did you just say owl's foot?"

Luan: "Yeah! Isn't she a hoot?" *laughs*

Employee: *unimpressed* "Next."

*The others are waiting and Lana brings them their burgers.*

Lana: "Alright, guys, dig in."

*The kids chow down on their burgers. When they finish, Lana and Ian look for the wrapper, but none of them are the one.*

Ian: "Bother!"

Leni: "Sorry we didn't find the winning wrapper, Lana."

*Hops wipes a tear from Lana with his tongue as Ian pats Lana's back. Lisa is observing the snow.*

Lisa: "The frozen precipitation is accumulating rapidly. I suggest we skedaddle."

Lana: "Wait! Don't you guys want another round?"

Ian: "We could try again to find the winning wrapper."

Lynn: *astonished* "We can have seconds?"

Lincoln: "How are we gonna pay for it?"

Ian: "Me and Lana have a plan."

*Lana peeks out from behind the trash bin and notices the coupon still jutting out from the register.*

Lana: "Hops. Sticky snag."

*Hops grabs the coupon with his tongue.*

Lana: *snatches it* "Bull's eye." *goes to the counter* "I'll take 11 more burgers, please. And I have another coupon." *gives it to the employee.*

Employee: *groans with the coupon stuck to his hand.* "Why is it so sticky?"

*Lana and Hops wink. Another round of burgers later, everyone except Ian and Lana look queasy from eating their seconds. Lola belches.*

Lana: "Ugh. Still nothing. We have to order more burgers!"

Lisa: "Uh, in light of the worsening meteorological conditions..." *burps* "...perhaps we should follow the lead of the other patrons and amscray."

*The others are leaving*

Hefty Blonde: "Come on. Hurry, hurry, hurry."

Unknown Woman: "I do not like the look of that sky."

Lana: "Oh, let them leave. That'll make our chances even better. Come on, you guys, one more round."

*The others groan in nausea.*

Lincoln: *queasy* "I can't eat anything else."

Luan: *nauseated* "I can't even joke about burgers right now."

Lana: "You don't have to eat 'em. Hops, Chuck, Ian and I will take them home for breakfast."

*Hops burps and the others sigh.*

Lana: "Great. Be right back. Don't move." *she and Ian grab Chuck and Hops and steps on Leni's legs out of the booth to the dumb blonde's shock.*

*Lana is behind the bin again and the coupon is still jutting out. Hops fires his tongue, but this time, the employee puts a meal on the counter, causing his tongue to hide the shake dispenser, pouring shake on the floor and making the employee slip and fall.*

Ian: "Oops."

Lana: "Let's try that again, buddy."

*Hops lands his tongue on the coupon this time, but the employee grabs it.*

Employee: "Hey, you little sneaks!" *tears up the coupon* "You want more burgers, you gotta pay for them!"

Ian: *nervous* Yes sir.

Lana: *nervous* "Um, not a prob." *she and Ian gather up loose change under the booths, in the potted plants plus a worm and carrot for Chuck and Hops, under the table with some gum, and in the ball pit; pours little change and some junk on the counter.* "11 more burgers, please."

Employee: *grossed out* "Jeez." *reaches for one of the pieces of junk.*

Lana: *grabs it* "Whoops. That's my chicken beak."

*The employee, disgusted, takes the rest, puts it in the register, and gives Lana the burgers.*

Employee: "Are you guys almost done? I wanna get outta here. I rode my bike to work."

Lana: "Don't worry. We'll be leaving soon.

Ian: "Hold your stinkin' horses sir."

Lana: "Besides, we've got a great feeling about this batch."

*All the wrappers are unwrapped.*

Lincoln: "Sorry, Lana. I don't have it."

Luna: "Me neither, dude."

Ian: "I got zilch."

Luan: "Same here. I guess that's a wrap!" *laughs and realizes the bad timing.* "Oh. Sorry."

*Only one wrapper left. Lana opens it up, and it's not the winner.*

Lana: *heartbroken* "Dang it. I guess Me and Ian aren't gonna be on Bobbie Fletcher's pit crew."

Leni: *grossed out* "Ew. Someone wrapped my burger in this dirty old rag."

*She's actually holding the winning wrapper.*

Lana: *overjoyed* "LENI! YOU FOUND IT! YOU FOUND IT!" *takes it and laughs*

Employee: "Finally." *puts on his helmet and closes up the counter.*

Lana: *laughs some more* "Finding this wrapper means the world to us. Thanks for all your help, guys."

Lynn: "Alright, now let's get home so I can let 'em rip in privacy."

Lucy: *gags; to Luna and Luan* "Can I bunk with you guys tonight?"

*They're about to leave. Leni opens the door and walks into some white stuff, making her siblings gasp.*

Leni: "Oops. This must be the closet where they keep their snow."

Lincoln: "No, Leni. We're snowed in."

*Outside shows that they are indeed trapped.*

Luna: "Aw, man. Are we gonna be stuck here all night?"

Ian: "I hope not."

Employee: *devastated* "No! I just worked a 12-hour shift! I can't take another second in this greasy dungeon!"

*He tries to cycle his way through the snow, but it's useless. The kids pull him out and put him in a chair.*

Ian: "It's no use. We're stuck here."

Employee: *sighs*

Luan: "Sorry, buddy, there's snow way out!" *giggles*

*The employee starts crying. Suddenly, a loud engine is heard and some tires screech, causing a thud, and it turns out to be Flip.*

Flip: "Guess who just earned a bunch of cheddar digging stranded suckers out of the snow?" *holds out his money* "Lay a dozen burgers on me, bicycle boy!"

Lana: "You can save your cheddar. Me and Ian already found the winning wrapper."

Flip: "What?! Bull hockey! That baby was gonna make me a fortune! I'm out!"

Lincoln: "Flip, wait! Can you give us a ride home? We're stuck here."

Flip: "Stuck, are ya? I can help you out...for a price. Let's say, uh, I don't know...one winning wrapper?"

Lana: "What? No way! Guys, we worked so hard for this. We'll get us home, We promise."

Flip: "Suit yourself, but this offer expires the second that door hits my keister."

*The employee latches onto Flip.*

Employee: *frantic* "Wait! I'll give you anything! My employee discount!"

Flip: "Throw in a jumbo sack of curly fries and you got a deal."

Employee: *grabs the sack and runs out.* "I'm free!"

Flip: *to the kids* "Catch ya on the Flip side!" *leaves*

Lori: "Well, I hope you know what you're doing, you two, because I am literally not sleeping on hamburger wrappers."

Lana: "No worries. Flip's truck cleared the path, so we just need to make it to Vanzilla."

Ian: "Easy peasy."

*Flip's truck backs right into the restaurant.*

Flip: "Whoops!"

*As he drives away, more snow falls and blocks the exit, making the kids groan.*

Lana: "Guys, we got this. Trust us. We'll get us out." *looks behind the counter and finds some fry scoops.* "And we know just how to do it."

*Ian and Lana are digging through the snow with the fry scoops and they both smell something.*

Lana: "Leaky gas and old string cheese." *sniffs some more* "We're close to Vanzilla. Charles has been giving us bloodhound lessons." *digs all the way to one of Vanzilla's doors.* "There you are, old girl! We'll have you out in a jiffy." *unearths Vanzilla* "Hey, guys! We're going home!"

*The kids are now in Vanzilla.*

Lori: "You literally did it, you two!"

Lana: "Thanks." *the others cheer for her* "Ha. And you guys wanted us to give our wrapper to Flip."

*Lori tries to start the engine up, but it doesn't start.*

Lana: "Hmm...better check the engine block." *opens the hood* "Of ice?"

Ian: "Great! More trouble!"

*The others groan*

Lola: "If you both just let Flip give us a ride, we'd be home by now!"

Lori: *groans while looking at her phone* "There's no signal here! I'm gonna warm up inside and use the landline!"

*The others go back in the restaurant.*

Lana: "Don't worry, Chuck and Hops. We'll figure this out." *gets an idea* "I know just the thing." *goes inside and brings back something* "Burger warming lamp!"

Ian: "Well let's hope this works."

*They turns it on, but it short circuits and causes a blackout in the restaurant.*

Ian and Lana's Siblings: "Dang it."

Ian: "Well that wasn't supposed to happen. Looks like your idea failed."

*The kids are shivering in the dark.*

Lori: "No signal. No landline. Bobby has no idea where I am. I feel so alone."

Lola: "Bobby is the least of our problems! I'm so cold I can't feel my tushie!"

Lincoln: "Come on, guys. We need to stay positive. We could be here all night."

*Hops and Chuck notice this, hop to Ian and Lana, and gets their attention while they're trying to defrost the engine.*

Lana: "Chuck, Hops, not now. We'll play later." *Hops grabs her and Chuck grabs Ian and leads them back to the restaurant.* "Hops."

Ian: "Chuck!"

*Hops and Chuck show Ian and Lana the condition their siblings are in. Lily starts coughing.*

Lori: "Oh, poor thing. I'll keep you warm."

Leni: *with napkins she put together* "I made cute shawls. Who wants one?"

Lola: "I'd rather freeze my tushie off than be seen wearing n-n-napkins."

Lucy: "If we huddle together and conserve our dwindling body heat, we may be able to stave off hypothermia."

*They all huddle up*

Lucy: "I forgot how much I hate huddling."

Ian: *guilty* "Look at what we've done. *crawls back*

Lana: *guilty also* "Aw, man. We've been so selfish." *follows*

Ian: *cries as Lana pats his back* "This is all our fault, We were so desperate to finding that winning wrapper that we didn't realize how much our siblings were more important." *shakes off his sorrow* "But luckily I have a plan to set things right. Let's find Flip. And the only way he can help us is if we give him our wrapper."

Lana: "You don't mean..."

Ian: "Lana, we've got no other choice. We either give our wrapper to Flip or he stay at Burpin Burger and freeze to death.

Lana: "You're right Ian. Let's get going."

*Later, a rumbling occurs and in comes what looks like a snow monster, making Ian and Lana's siblings scream in horror, but it shakes and reveals to be Flip.*

Lincoln: "Flip? What are you doing here?"

Ian and Lana: *appears behind him* "We tracked him down. We just followed the smell of curly fries and B.O."

Lisa: "You both went out in these conditions? You both could have lost a digit to frostbite."

Ian: "True we could've died of frostbite."

Lana: "But we had to. We couldn't let you guys suffer all night because of us. So now Flip will take us home."

Flip: "Right after I get that wrapper."

*Lana reluctantly hands the wrapper over to Flip, to everyone's shock.*

Lincoln: "We know how much that wrapper meant to you. Thanks for giving it up and getting us out of here. We're proud of you for making the right choice." *hugs Ian and Lana*

*The others join in*

Lynn: "Thanks, Lans. Thanks Ian."

Luna: "Mighty dece of you both."

Luan: "We know how much this means to you, Ian and Lana."

*Flip's truck is pushing through the snow when they notice someone else out there.*

Flip: "Well, lookie here, another sucker."

*It's revealed to be Bobbie Fletcher, and Flip just drives right past her.*

Flip: "Sit tight, chief! I'll be back for you later!"

Lana: "Wait! That's Bobbie Fletcher! Stop, Flip! We have to help her!"

*Flip sighs and backs up to Bobbie's car and Ian and Lana gets out to their hero.*

Lana: "Excuse us, Ms. Fletcher? What happened?"

Bobbie: "Engine died. This baby can hit 210 in the straightaway, but throw a little snow at her and she conks out."

*Ian and Lana looks at the engine.*

Lana: "Mind if we-"

Bobbie: "It's all yours."

*Lana and Ian are working on the engine.*

Lana: "See if she'll turn over now."

*Bobbie tries it and it works.*

Ian: "There you go. Good as new."

Bobbie: "Dang. My pit crew isn't even that fast. What are your names, sports?"

Ian and Lana: *proud* "Ian and Lana Loud."

Bobbie: "Well, thank you, Ian and Lana Loud." *gives them her business card* "Give me a call when you're both 18. I could use someone like you both on my team."

Lana: "Wow! Thanks!" *she and Ian go back into Flip's truck*

*Their siblings cheer*

Lori: "Way to go, Ian and Lana."

*Flip is unimpressed and rolls down his window.*

Flip: "Hey, Blippity Fletchman! She may have fixed your car, but I'm the one who brought her here. How about a little something for me?"

Bobbie: "Coming right up, pal."

*Bobbie revs up her engine and speeds off, blasting some snow all over Flip.*

*music video,music plays*

Ian and Lana: *singing* One wintery day at the house of Loud, there was something that we spoke aloud about a contest to meet our hero but first we were zeroes.

Ian: *singing* Once we arrived at Burpin Burger, we saw our hero of the hour,then as snow covered the Burpin Burger, things started to turn very sour.

Ian and Lana: *singing* There was Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out. Yes there was Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out.

Lana: *singing* After we got snowed in, that's when Flip came, Him giving us a ride home was our one way, but when we declined our wrapper,he just drove out away.

Ian and Lana: *singing* There was Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out. Yes there was Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out.

*instrumental break*

Ian and Lana: *singing* Soon after we noticed our siblings were freezing and cold, we realized that we felt very selfish, so we found Flip and he got us all out, but to our own surprise, we got to meet the hero of our eyes. But most importantly there was a Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out. Yes there was Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out,Snow Way Out.

*song ends as Ian and Lana wink*

The End