Chapter One

He was dead.

He was dead, Kellogg the bastard who took my son was finally dead, and killed by my own hands.

I felt a whirl of emotions rush through me as I rode the elevator to the roof, using the wall as support. I felt sick, tired, confused and had a hollow feeling take root in my stomach. I let out a breath and closed my eyes. That fight had taken a lot out of me, more than I could have given. I had almost died.

If Nick hadn't been there I would have been left as nothing more than a smoldering pile of ash, to be swept up by Kellogg's synths. My back slumped against the wall and I sank down to my knees, my legs lacking the strength to keep me upright. I saw in the corner of my eye that Nick had taken a step closer to me, I was grateful that he didn't hover. "You okay there kid?" He asked, his yellow electronic eyes looked me over.

When I had first met Nick Valentine I had been daunted by those piercing hawk like eyes. Now though, now I thought they fit him rather well and he would look strange without them. "Yeah Nick, I'm fine. I'm just having some trouble telling my legs that." I joked. It was all to often now for me to make light of a bad situation. But hey, it was better than having that harsh reality slap you in the face. "I just need a minute."

Nick smirked and lit a cigarette, filling the tiny elevator with a puffs of smoke. I hated that musky smell, yet after that fight I wasn't about to tell Nick to put it out. He deserved it. He also didn't have to come with me into that mess, but he wanted to and for that I was truly grateful. "Take all the time ya need Kid."

We rode the rest of the way up in a comfortable silence. I slowly rose up when I heard the familiar ping letting us know we reached the top and final floor.

The doors slid open, venting out the elevator with a rush of air. I happily breathed in the heavy air of the outside. Sure it was mixed with radiation and smog, but up here the air was a bit cleaner. I closed my eyes and step out letting the cool autumn night air blow through my hair. And cool down my burning cheeks.

"Would you look at that." Nick whistled which caught my attention. Curious I turned and stared wide eye and slacked jaw at the massive ship in the sky. What's a dirigible doing out here, and how is it even operational? I wondered shocked. Whose was it even, friend or foe?

Nick must have seen the confusion play out on my face, "It's a brotherhood ship, THE Brotherhood of Steel ship." He said with a edge to his voice. "It cant be good if they're suddenly showing to the party."

Stunned I turned my gaze back to the massive illuminated ship. It was certainly impressive to say the least. Especially during this fallout hell of a wasteland. I didn't think there would be any chance of any plane or ship to be airborne. Yet here was my proof and I was dumbfounded. The giant aircraft suddenly released what looked to be helicopters, yet they weren't like any I ever seen before. They had two propellers on both sides of the wings not one in the middle. It kind of looked like if a small plane and a helicopter had a child. At least a dozen either flew around the dirigible while others were released from what seemed to be a docking port, and scattered themselves across the night sky, more than likely over the Commonwealth.

Suddenly a commanding, authoritative voice boomed all around me, knocking me out of my stupor. "People of the Commonwealth," It stated, his voice whoever it was spoke firmly, without a hint of softness. I'd hate to meet that guy in person, he sounded grumpy. "Do not interfere our intentions are peaceful we are The Brotherhood of Steel."

I heard Nick scoff next me, but he said nothing as the looming ship flew overhead. So the brotherhood finally decided to show up. Haylen must have gotten that transmitter doodad working. I mused as I sat down at the side of the building letting my legs dangle over the edge. Nick took a seat next to me while taking a drag from his cigarette. I saw his yellow eye look at me from the corner of my vision, "So, gonna meet up with that boyfriend of yours?" He asked, a puff of smoke filtering out of his mouth. "Been a while since you've seen him."

"He's not my boyfriend." I said flatly, trying to ignore the creeping of a blush that danced on my cheeks. He was of course talking about Paladin Danse. The legendary brotherhood solider-as Rhys so eloquently phrased it-who I had stumbled into a few months ago. I had been scavenging in downtown Cambridge looking for odds and ends to get the generator up and running in Sanctuary. I hadn't visited Cambridge since the bombs had dropped so I had no idea what to expect. I had been digging through a pile of discarded junk when I had heard gun fire.

When I followed the sound I had noticed a pack of ferals scattering around a well-fortified police station, with two figures guarding the entrance. One was wearing a set of armor like the one I had found at the Museum of Freedom, yet it looked in much better condition than mine. At first I had been tempted to turn back and forget what I saw. But that was only a passing thought. I knew deep down in my gut that I needed to help, even if I couldn't offer much. Back then I couldn't do much in a fight, which was why I had tried to avoid it as best as I could.

I had been rewarded with a gun in my face.

Thankfully the Paladin had understood that I wasn't a hostile. Then one thing led to another after that. I had been convinced to travel to Arckject with the Paladin to acquire a deep range transmitter thing, then led on a scavenger hunt for more "old world junk" as I had phrased it. Then I became an exterminator of ferals. And after all that I went on a hunt to find what happened to the missing recon squad.

That had been one crazy long month. But I couldn't say that I didn't enjoy myself. Well I didn't like the while going into underground tunnels to kill ferals in close knit areas.

No I enjoyed the company, with the exception of Rhys. That guy could take a long hike into a vat of radiation for all I cared. I had instantly bonded with Hayley,, she was so sweet that it was hard not to become friends with her. One night the two of us had stayed up all hours of the night just talking with one another. We had been caught when Danse had switched out guard duty with Rhys. We ended up having to clean the whole gun closest.

Then there was Paladin Danse. At first I hated the big looming tin can-well hates a strong word-. He was too by the books, to rough around the edges. That and his lectures! The man could talk for hours! I would get one almost anytime I did something he didn't approve of, which happened a lot. Like at Arckjet,. I had maybe been a little too reckless and almost got the two of us killed my throwing my grenade a little too far and blowing up a crate which contained oil, which had thus exploded sending a shower of burning oil to the ground like rain. But that could have happened to anyone, right?

We had butted heads on several occasions, mostly during his training sessions. After my little stunt he had personally stepped in as my trainer. I had fought with him, that I didn't need his constant watch on me, that I didn't need him waiting for me to mess up so he could lecture me on my erratic behavior. But I found that that wasn't the reason why he had wanted to train me. He wanted to make sure I wouldn't get hurt out there, or worse hurt someone else.

After that confession I had begun to take notice to a few things. Gradually we stopped yelling at one another, and it was replaced by light jokes and comfortable conversations. We both became kinder to one another, where I was learning to be a bit like him, and he was learning to go with the flow. Not too soon after we both fell into a rhythm where he would shoot and I had his back, and vice versa. To me I was beginning to feel like I belonged at his side, and I liked it.

And soon enough I began to notice even more. Something else that both excited me and terrified me. I was beginning to feel something more for the big tin man.

I didn't even notice until it crept up on me. The more time I spent with him,, the more I actually saw the real Danse. Not Paladin Danse, but Danse. The other side of him,, not the senior officer whose very voice commanded respect with every word. But I saw the other sides to him. I saw his kind, caring and devoted side. I saw the fierce determination to keep people safe. The drive he felt to make the world a safer place. I also saw his naïve side. It warmed my heart to watch him go from this imposing towering figure with sharp edges, to a softer, more at ease man who would blush at a complement towards his looks, or a playful jest of suggesting to kiss on the cheek. He had opened up to me, shown me the guilt he felt at losing his teammate, the burden he alone thought he had to wear.

At first I thought he showed this other side to everyone, until I realized he would only drop-albeit some-of his guard around me.

It made my heart beat madly in my chest and emotions swell within me. Emotions I had not felt in a long time.

It also made me want to run.

Which was why I had left, well it was one of the reasons why I had left the Cambridge police station. I thought maybe sometime apart would jog me to my senses, would help me forget the way he made me feel with just a laugh, or a glance, or a smile. That and I needed to remember my purpose. Danse was a distraction. And I needed to remember I was out here to find my son, and the bastards that took him. I found one, but now I was stuck.

And I was beginning to miss Danse.

I let out a sigh before rummaging around in my bag for bandages. The buffout and Med-x I had taken before the fight was slowly wear off, allowing the pain to flood to my sense, and remind me the state my body was in. I was against the use of chems, but I knew that my fight would be a close one, and I didn't want the pain of my injuries to distract me. I could feel the cut on the side of my face all too easily now. I glanced at Nick and gave him a pleading look, "Hey Nick," I said slowly, "Think you could give me a hand?"

Nicked rolled his shoulder and put out his cigarette. "No problem Kid."

We both fell into a busy silence while Nick tended to my head, and I worked on my other wounds. No doubt I would get a lecture from Danse if he had been here.

I felt a pang of longing strike my chest like a white knife.

A sigh of frustration past my lips and I looked down at my calloused hands. I couldn't forget him, no matter how hard I tried burying my feelings. Nick's voice drifted to my ears, knocking me out of my trance. "All patched up there. " He said dropping the left over bandages in my lap. "I'm no expert, but I think that gash is gonna scar."

"Maybe it'll add to my street credit. "My non existent one.

Nick only shook hi head, "Kid-" He had stated to say before a cracking sound burst from my Pitboy. Not long after, Danse's gruff voice crackled to life, calling all brotherhood of steel members back to the police station. Hearing his voice again made my breath hitch and blood to rush to my ears. I didn't realized how much I missed it.

Nick gave me a side ways look. "You gonna head back there?"

I nodded my head slowly, still absorbed with Danse's voice, and trying to picture his face in my mind.

Nick let out a laugh and placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder. It was the physical touch that brought me back to reality. "You gonna tell him how you feel?" He asked.

I shook my head, "How'd you know?"

Nick raised a mechanical eyebrow and fished out another cigarette. "I'm a detective kid." He laughed, "That and the way you had talked about him on the way here gave me a wild guess."

"I guess I'm that obvious huh?"

"Maybe." He said pulling out his lighter and lighting the tobacco. "Probably not to him thought. From what you've told me about him, seems to me that he's the oblivious social awkward type of guy."

"Definitely." I grinned.

"Well seems to me you got two options." He said after he blew a puff of smoke out. "You can either tell him and get on with your life, you won't be able till you do. Cause kid, I can tell, you got it real bad."

I really did. I mused, "What's the other option."

"You don't." He said plainly, his gaze leering out into the distance. "And it stays buried within you until it turns to heartache and regret."

From his tone and the far off look in his eyes, something told me that he knew that feeling first hand. I had been tempted to push further, but something told me to drop it. It wasn't the time. Though it made me wonder. Could synths really feel love? Or were they programmed to feel love? It seemed like Nick genuinely could. Which went against everything Danse had taught me. Maybe, just maybe synths could feel and were more human than led to believe.

But that was a topic for a different time. I got up slowly, feeling my stiff and sore muscles screaming in protest. "I think I might just take your advice Nick."

Nick chuckled as he rose from his spot, "You might want to be honest about a few other things first." He saw the side ways look I gave him and sighed, "About you being the General of the Minutemen and being a human ice cube for the last two hundred years."

Right…I hadn't told Danse that much. He only knew the minimum, that I was a vault dweller-which was technically true-and on occasion worked with the minutemen. I hadn't divulged in any more than that. I didn't even know if he would believe me, and if by some strange moment he did, would he hate me? Would he think I was part of the reason the world went to shit? I could live with unrequited affection, I couldn't live with him hating me.

But Nick was right, I had to tell him, maybe not all at once. Wouldn't want to overwhelm the guy and have him run for the hills. "Well." I said as I glanced towards the giant ship, now only a speck in the distance. "I better get going."

"Your heading there now." He asked and I could hear concern underneath that Boston cop accent. "I think you better take a rest there kid, I don't think your up for a long walk."

"Pfft, I'll be fine Nick." I shrugged, "But thanks for caring." I added with sincerity.

Nick gave me a smile, "I'd go with ya kid, but the brotherhood and I don't exactly see eye to eye. But I'll stop in Sanctuary and send Dogmeat after you if we don't hear from ya."

"Thanks Nick," I wouldn't even ask him to, I knew Danse would shoot on sight. No questions asked. "I know Nick, and don't worry, I don't plan on engaging in any gun fights on the road." I wasn't in any condition for a fight, nor did I have the supplies to last in one. I had used up most of my ammo on the synths and had used up most of my medical supplies. All I had left was buffout and medicine-x I had salvaged from the place, and I didn't plan on using that unless I needed it. Which I hoped I wouldn't. It was fine with me, I rather like sneaking my way past hostiles, and I had gotten a lot better at the art of sneaking. No longer did I trip over my own two feet at least not as often as I used too.. "I'll send word to Diamond city once I get there."

"See that you do." He said with a tip of his hat. "I'd hate to come looking for you to only find a corpse.."

`~x~`

It was a long track back to the Cambridge police station and I had left not to long after my departure from Nick that night, now it was a little after five am. I glanced down at my pitboy, I was almost there. Thank god, I could feel my limbs screeching with every step I took. I felt disoriented and sick all at once, from not sleeping or eating for the last twenty four hours.

I had decided to just go without stopping. I didn't want to waste time, even though I didn't have a time limit. I just wanted to get there. It wouldn't end well if I had pulled up camp and been attacked in the night. With my limited supply of ammo and no stimpacks, I wouldn't make it. It wasn't a very sensible decision, but I couldn't see any other course of action. As for the no food part I didn't have time to stock up in Diamond City before I had chased down Kellogg.

I knew I would be in for a lecture when I got there, and Danse saw my sorry looking mug. "You need to be properly nourished before walking into the unknown." I mimicked doing a very poor Danse impression. My voice just wasn't deep enough, "A good solider always is prepared." That and I lacked his wide vocabulary.

I shook my head, yeah I really wasn't in any type of mood for a lecture. All I wanted was to clean up the dried blood on my face, sink my teeth into a Salisbury steak and sleep for the next couple of days.

But that wasn't going to happen. I could only guess that they'd probably be sending me on another grunt mission to either search for lost tech or clear out some old abandoned subway station.

Oh joy….

The light was coming up from the east now, a tinge of paler grey on the horizon, it was enough to keep me from stumbling as I crept behind the old run down buildings in Cambridge. Drowsy though I was I had continued to sneak my way though the mostly abandoned city. Occasionally stopping and hiding to avoid a group of roaming ferals, or the small raider party that walked the streets searching for someone to beat on. They must have a base near by I thought. Idiots, who would be stupid enough to have a base near the brotherhoods?

Well they'd be in for a rude awakening if they ever tried to attack the place.

After what seemed like a lifetime the police station came into view. There were more people there than I was used to seeing. The whole entrance way was littered with brotherhood soldiers all in different types of standard armor, and power armor.

I made my way towards the entrance, I was dimly aware of the slight throbbing behind my eyes and the light headed feeling that floated in my mind as a hazy fog. I was too focus on the person in front of me to care about the pain I felt. He looked the same as when I had left. I smiled as I walked towards him. "Danse," I rasped out, hearing my voice it sounded as if it was miles away.

He turned towards me, and I saw his eyes widened. Heh, surprised to see me huh? My vision then began to blur, but I thought I saw him draw closer to me.

I shook my hear violently to clear it, but my vision only got worse, and as he drew close I felt myself stagger backwards. My field of vision contracted to a single black dot then disappeared completely. I felt dizzy as the world rushed below me. I didn't even realized I had fallen till my head hit the payment. I would have cried out, but I slowly fell into the black void that over took my vision.