A/N: This one is for my friend, Annabell, This-Family-Affair. Here's SWEETS! It's a continuation of her song-fic, "I'm Too Sexy" featuring US!!! Don't worry. We're still here, Anna!
Lime in the Coconut
As soon as the 12-year-old tossed the keys back to Special Agent Seeley Booth, Dr. Lance Sweets walked up on the stage. The piano player took one look at the sheet music the kid handed him and rolled his eyes. Sweets set up the special effects quickly before winking at the girls in the corner, who giggled. (Of course the would.)
The room went pitch black, and two spot lights came on, one a coconut, and the other a lime. Both focused on Sweets.
Sweets deliberately made his voice deep as he sang;
"Brother bought a coconut, he bought it for a dime
His sister had another one, she paid it for the lime."
The girls in the corner were sitting there, giggling still. One girl was hyperventilating. Sweets glanced over there, and grinned as he sang,
"She put the lime in the coconut, she drank 'em both up
She put the lime in the coconut, she drank 'em both up
She put the lime in the coconut, she drank 'em both up."
Cheers from the same table that had cheered Booth on, sprung up again.
"Put the lime in the coconut, she called the doctor, woke him up, and said,
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, to relieve this bellyache, I said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, to relieve this bellyache."
Sweets picked up the stand and spun around, winding the cord around himself. He deepened his voice as the girls in the corner laughed even harder.
"Now let me get this straight
Put the lime in the coconut, you drank 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, you drank 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, you drank 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, you called your doctor, woke him up, and said,"
At the table where his friends were sitting, the man with a beard called, "GO, SWEETS!" There were several calls of, "Oww!" from the three women sitting there.
"You put the lime in the coconut, you drink 'em both together
Put the lime in the coconut, then you feel better
Put the lime in the coconut, drink 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, and call me in the morning."
Now the rest of the attendee's were laughing their asses off.
"Brother bought a coconut, he bought it for a dime
His sister had another one, she paid it for the lime
She put the lime in the coconut, she drank 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, she called the doctor, woke him up, and said,"
The man up on stage winked at the girls, who squealed like fangirls.
"Put the lime in the coconut, she called the doctor, woke him up, and said,
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, to relieve this bellyache, I said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, to relieve this bellyache."
Even the piano player was having trouble keeping from laughing.
"Put the lime in the coconut, you drank 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, you drank 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, you drank 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, you're such a silly woman."
With that, Sweets pulled a coconut and lime out of nowhere and threw them at the two giggling girls. The coconut hit the blonde, and the lime hit the other girl.
That made his friends laugh even harder, if at all possible.
"Put the lime in the coconut, you drink 'em both together
Put the lime in the coconut, then you feel better
Put the lime in the coconut, drink 'em both down
Put the lime in the coconut, and call me in the morning."
Sweets found some sweets in his pocket and threw them at the man that still held Booth's shirt.
"Woo-oo, ain't there nothin' you can take, I said
Woo-oo, to relieve your bellyache, you said
Woo-oo, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Woo-oo, to relieve your bellyache, you say."
Whenever he sang, 'woo-oo' he moved his head from side to side, like a djinn.
The crowd laughed really hard as his head moved.
"Yeah-ah, ain't there nothing I can take, I say
Wow-ow, to relieve this bellyache, I said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take, I said
Doctor, you're such a silly woman."
Booth pulled out a lighter, flicked it open, and moved it back and forth, grinning and laughing.
"Put the lime in the coconut, you drink 'em both together
Put the lime in the coconut, then you feel better
Put the lime in the coconut, drink 'em both up
Put the lime in the coconut, and call me in the mo-o-ornin'"
Sweet's voice deepened as he sang the 'doctor's' part.
"Yes, you call me in the morning
If you call me in the morning I'll tell you what to do."
As Sweets finished the song with a flourish, he managed to wrap the cord around his legs even more.
He tried to step down the stairs, and tripped off the stage, hitting his head on the ground near Booth's feet.
Booth looked down at him. (The girls were in the background, laughing rambunctiously.) "Have a nice trip, Sweets?"
Sweets turned beet red. "Who's up next?"
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Hey, Anna, I was the one hit with the coconut. I STILL HAVE THE HAT!!!!!