A/N:
I am 99% sure my lovely beta hasn't seen Endgame yet so this one will not be beta-read, I'm afraid. This isn't THAT spoilery but at the same time it really is.
Don't read this until you've seen Endgame, folks!
He crashes back into reality right about the time an arrow tip is drawn at his forehead. The world swims in a glassy haze. He swallows. They come into focus.
"I think I'll have that drink now."
Shock soon wears off and agony strikes him, harsher and duller than before. He'd forgotten what it was like to walk on broken bones, to call for magic and have nothing but the universe's dregs rush to his fingertips. He'd forgotten the bone-deep ache of his muscles and the horrible clawing at the edges of his mind.
He'd forgotten what it meant to be unmade.
This form is used to this. It is used to breathing through raw lungs, to walking on nails and clawing its way out of darkness.
Loki isn't.
He's been hardened by loss, shattered by grief, and softened through love. His sharp edges have worn smoother, his cold heart has thawed.
He never wants to be That Loki again. The Loki who's mind is still half under Thanos' influence, who's eyes still burn blue... But he will, if it means saving half of the universe.
If it means saving HIS universe- If it means saving Thor.
His brain scrambles to collect information as he hauls himself to his feet, careful ears picking up every last snippet of conversation. He's being moved, the sceptre (the Stone-) is being moved, a strike team (whatever that is) is on its way.
He knows they will take him down in the lift, that the man of iron will be forced to part with the tesseract, that the Avengers will leave him with the government and collect him later after eating 'Schwarma'.
They don't know that yet, of course.
But he does.
Such is the benefit of time travel.
"Just act normal." He thinks.
Normal... As far as they're concerned, that is. A magic douchebag high on power with no boundaries or sense of restraint.
He panics.
He transforms into the Captain and does his best impression, he waves at the hulk, he swaggers as if he hasn't just been beaten into the Loki-shaped hole in the floor.
'Normal' is easier said than done.
He quickly realises, however, as Stark collapses to the ground, the tesseract 'mysteriously' bounces away and that one fishy security guard attempts to make off with it that 'normal' has been thrown off kilter.
Loki doesn't know if it's the effect of his own little trip to the past or if somewhere in the future, the Avengers are meddling.
He glances between the two scenes of chaos- the fleeing security guard and the convulsing Iron Man. The mage only catches the briefest glimpse of the man's face but he knows; there's two Starks, two Iron Mans wandering loose in 2012 NYC.
Something has gone horribly wrong in the future.
Time is a slippery thing, however, and he cannot be certain or uncertain whether or not his little venture through time and space has caused or been the result of this.
He doesn't even know if he can influence his reality's future, his REAL reality's future without simply breaking this one off into another timeline.
He knows he can't return, that's certain. That was the price. His body is ashes and his days are quite literally numbered; he could tick each one off on a calendar as it passes if he cared to. He would if the idea wasn't quite so morbid, if he didn't think it might weaken his resolve.
The mage will reshape time and space and he WILL save his universe.
When Future!Tony is thrown aside by a sulking hulk and the tesseract comes skidding to his feet he only hesitates for the briefest of moments. This is not how things are supposed to go.
He glances towards the Avengers. Towards Thor.
Where is he more useful? At his side or saving the universe?
He cannot be both the brother he needs and the sacrifice the universe demands.
(He's tried that one once already- His people died. His brother was tortured. His place in that reality was destroyed).
Slender fingers pluck the tesseract from the ground and before Loki can doubt himself again, he folds time and space around him like a blanket, cloaking himself in stars and galaxies and night.
He flies far away to a barren moon on the edge of the cosmos and waits for Thanos to come looking. Here, there is no Thor to torture. Here, there are no Asgardians to be killed. Here, his only weakness is himself.
Loki will be ready. He will not let the universe die a second time.
The stone seems to hum in agreement.
A/N:
I'm just saying, Loki's behaviour in the New York flashback and in Infinity War felt a little off to me. Here's to hoping there's a grand plan! :)