I can smell the Death on the sheets

covering me

i cant beileve

this is the end

But this is my deathbed

I lie here alone

If i close my eyes tonight,

I know i'll be home.

I, Kendall Knight is on his deathbed. Everyone looks at me, simpathedicly. Now im sure your wondering how I got here. Well.. lets go back a couple years ago..

I was young, fresh. Only 17 years old, and I felt amazing. I had just got my first car, and I had the man of my dreams, Carlos Garcia. Yeah yeah, I like guys, if your wondering. Theres just this something with them that you can't get with girls. And Carlos... I had loved him since I was 13, So this was a big deal to me.

I was out with James, Logan and Carlos. Doing God knows what, when James pulled out a pack of ciggerettes. He pulled one out, and lighted it with a lighter. I watched close as he held it between his two fingers, and Huffed a ring of smoke out. This was new to me, I had never seen James smoke before.

"Since when do you smoke?" I spoke up.

James took another quick huff, flicked the ashes down at the ground. He held it close to his mouth. "I started just this year" He finally said. I nodded my head, and Carlos came over and put his arm around me. He struggled, considering he was a lot shorter than me.

"Can I try one?" I said. Logan and Carlos gasped.

"You've never had one?" Logan said, giggling.

"Oh like you have." I said, smirking. He lowered his head down in defeat.

James handed me a ciggerette. I took it, and placed it in my mouth. He took the lighter, and lighted it on fire for me. I've seen other people do it, so I just mimicked what I have seen. I sucked, and blew. Everyone smiled.

Since then, I had smoked for about 15 more years.

I smoked untill I threw up, yet I still lit em' up, like a machiene.

So right there you have it, that one filthy habit is what got me where I am today.

I watch my friends' look of despair. Carlos was standing by my bed, stroking my hair. And James is on the other side, wiping the tears from my eyes. Now theres probably two things your wondering:

1. Wasn't James the one to get you to smoke in the first place?

2. Where the hell is Logan?

Well, James quit about 10 years ago, But I kept smoking. And second, Logie died a few years ago. He drown in a lake.

I started feeling light-headed. Suddenly very tired. "Guys, Its time.." My voice, barely above a whisper. I looked into their eyes. Their whole worlds were falling apart, I could see.
"Kendall." Carlos took a deep breath. "I love you more than you will ever know. You'll always be in my heart, and in my dreams."
James leaned down and kissed my forehead. I could feel his tears, wet on my face. "I love you, bro." He whispered. He raised up, and held my hand. Everything was getting blurry. I heard a voice, comming from somewhere, saying that it was time to leave. "I love you two so much." I rushed out. The last thing I felt was Carlos' lips on mine. Then everything went black. The next thing I know, is that I'm standing behind them. They were clinging on to my perrished body, sobbing. I wanted to walk over to them, and hug them forever. But God took ahold of my hand, and whispered.
"Don't worry; I'll talke good care of them."