To Love...and be Loved

Time Passed

Disclaimer: I only own the character of Lord Satoru. Any other, is the brilliant workings of Rumiko Takahashi, creator of InuYasha, who gives us the ability to dream.

I was fourteen, the day that I had realized my true feelings towards the demon who had been my protector since I was a child. After two years stay within the village, I returned to my journeys with Lord Sesshomaru, and Master Jaken. He returned my shield, my protector and savior, in more ways than one. His strength, will, and determination, all the things that I loved about him, had remained the same, as had his regard for me. But that night, my thoughts of seeing him only as a guardian changed. On a night much like tonight, the full moon rose high into the starry sky, a small breeze sent a rustle through the trees and a chill through the air that nipped at the end of your nose and toes. I held my furs closer, and moved nearer the fire. All efforts were useless.

My teeth chattered within the silence that lingered when Jaken had left to fetch more wood, at the request of Lord Sesshomaru. Nine years later, and I cannot truly understand what it was that tempted him that night, but when he looked at me, a shiver at the cause of a temperature lower than that of the air, ran through my spine. My heart began to race, and breathing became near impossible. He eyed me from head to toe with a ravenous glare, as if I was his next prey. In that stare, I forgot the cold of the winter's night; I forgot the need to conceal myself for warmth from the outside world when all the heat of summer lay within.

Seeking to escape his glare, I excused myself for the lakes nearest the mountain of fire. They would bring warmth and more importantly, relief from those eyes, however short-lived it may have been. He had followed after me, in his typically silent manner, he managed to speak louder than I could have ever believed possible. He joined me within the soothing waters. And it was there, in a place now sacred to me, that I gave myself to Lord Sesshomaru of the Western Lands. The joy that night, was one I thought that could never be compared to, we were one, together almost every night. Nights that turned into weeks, and weeks evolving into months. But soon none of it mattered, things had changed. A new course of events to be determined based on a fate, of which I could no longer be certain. I had become pregnant.

I did not know how Lord Sesshomaru had learned to overcome his disgust for the idea of a relationship with a human, but remained hateful of half-breeds. Now however, I know that Love and Lust are not the same, and perhaps it was the latter, that led Lord Sesshomaru to me. What I did know for certain was, that it came to be the very thing that pulled him from me. Not that it changed anything, all had been said and done, words that hurt far more than any that I could ever have imagined were said. The last night we spoke was one I care not to dwell on. Never the less, I did what I must, and returned to the village to remain with Lady Kaede and Lady Kagome.

Both of whom soon knew the truth; due to Sesshomaru's scent lingering over me for some time, which of course InuYasha detected. To them I relayed a certain amount of truth, I went far enough to make it clear that I was the one who chose to leave, as not to embarrass Lord Sesshomaru. After hours of convincing InuYasha not to follow and try his brother's patience, great thanks I owe to Kagome and her children, we began to hope. Seperately, I began to study. I learned all that I could about the births of demons, not that any of it was of use. These were demon females.

Two months later, in the afternoon of late spring, I went to the lake to fetch warm water so that Kagome could get her son to finally take a bath. Suddenly an overwhelming pain pitted itself in my stomach; I fell to the ground in agony, dropping the vase in the water. My belly was being beaten and kicked from the inside out. I knew enough to know that the baby was not ready yet, but I could not help but wonder. Was there something wrong? Time passed slowly as breathing became harder; the pain grew, as did the fear that I would not be found, that my child would be lost. But no sooner than the entrance of that thought within the deepest part of mind, was the deepest part of my soul, and my heart forever changed. My life from that moment on would take a path I never expected. I had been saved by a demon.

I can never forget that day, as I felt the pain could no longer worsen, I saw him. A demon dressed in a black hakama concealing a strongly built body. My eyes traced from his long claws and marked hands, til finally they rested upon his pale face and eyes the purest blue. Almost the same color of his hair, ice blue, that shone with a fierce, untamable fire, his bangs were parted to reveal a small red diamond and marks similar to those that framed Lord Sesshomaru's face. He was a demon of great power, perhaps equal to Lord Sesshomaru, though this thought sent a shiver through my whole body. A demon would not be wandering freely around our village, we had nothing to offer. I was not afraid, something in my eyes comforted me, and told me there was no reason for such fear.

He approached me with the grace of an angel and an auror of white, all the while his eyes locked on me. He bent down slowly to me, as if afraid that he would frighten me.

"My name is Satoru." His voice. Musical, gentle, and soft, yet strong with a commanding power that matched his presence. "I mean you nor your children harm..."

Children? I was having twins.

"I only mean to take you safely to your village, if that is alright."

Speechless, I just nodded. As his hands moved beneath me, lifting me effortlessly off the ground my heart fluttered at his warm touch. True to his word, with my assistance, he took me to my hut. He made sure that I was well taken care of before leaving to find Lady Kaede, at this time, she should be near the well gathering herbs. He returned shortly after with her, who agreed that it was a warning that the babies would be coming soon, no later than a month or two. The negative side was, that this pain would occur weekly until the babies were born. He knew of a tea that could ease the pain, and it consisted of herbs that could easily be found around our village, hesitantly she left quickly to fetch Kagome to retrieve them, promising a quick return.

"May I thank you…?"

"No, my Lady...If I may, may I take a seat beside you."

I nodded. "Never the less, I am grateful."

"Think nothing of it." He bowed his head.

The way he looked at me, with that smile, sent blood rushing to my cheeks.

"I cannot imagine what would have happened had you not found me."

As if in a daze, he returned. "Neither can I."

I turned away from him to hide the large smile that covered my face.

That was the beginning of my new life, the day that I met Lord Satoru Fujian of the Northern Lands.

The time that I was to give birth, throughout the whole month, he was always by side. There when I awoke in the morning, and there when I closed my eyes at night, of course in the main room. Some nights I would dream of Sesshomaru, and awake with tears in my eyes, and he would be there to hold me til I went to sleep, telling me stories of his land and the places he traveled to. As a child, I was never one for long stories, but his entertained me. In the day he would pick me flowers, see to the health of me and my children, cook, help clean and walk with me through the forest when I found I couldn't stay in anymore. However, on some cases, some being from situations that were his stories, he would leave, much to my dismay. I found his absence to leave the nights quite heartless, though he would return within the same week, it was still an empty, cold night.

One day he returned, quite unlike himself, all confused and quiet. Finally he spoke, to ask and take me for a walk to where we first met, he told me again that he was deeply sorry for the constant absences, given his position I understood.

"Its no good, Rin. I can't be without you. Every day that I leave you, I feel a piece of my soul die slowly away. A piece of my heart if ripped from me everytime. I am in love with you. Marry me, live this life, and every other with me?"

"Satoru, I can't."

"Why not?"

"I am not a demon. I carry children..."

"I know, Rin. But I want you as my wife, you. You beauftiful mortal creature. I don't care who was foolish enough to mate with you and leave you. But I am still happy that they did, otherwise, I would never have met you. I would never have the chance to feel the way I do. I do not care what you are, I care who you are, and who these children are. My children."

"You would give them your name?"

"Yes." He spoke with joy. "My dearest, sweetest, Rin. Marry me?"

Tears welled down my cheeks as I nodded. And there, a place even more sacred than those warm waters, my life became my own. It turned towards something better. Satoru had truly declared them to be his children, and not even InuYasha dared to disagree. He loved me, and did not care for any of what would drive someone else away, and I loved him for that. For the beautiful heart he held beneath a beautiful and demonic exterior. Within that week we were married.

The joy and excitement had sent me into two days labor, the most painful, un-regrettable days of my life. I received the news that I had given birth to a boy, the oldest, and a little girl. As I held them in my arms for the first time, a feeling of warmth and happiness ran through me, and I knew that I had made no mistake in choosing to keep them. Some part of me wished Sesshomaru would have been here, but I knew that his hatred for them would have surpassed his love. And they were far too precious to be hated, they deserved love, something I knew they would receive from both Satoru and I. I smiled, high on a cloud of which I could never come down. They were the most beautiful things that I had ever seen. Their pure white hair, pointed ears, their soft smooth skin went beyond that of a mortal child, marked on their foreheads was the very same crescent as their father.

My son seemed to resemble his father through their similar pale skin. Their calm, yet frightful essence given through their eyes of liquid amber that opened to see me. I met the eyes of my son, and he smiled, illuminating my world. He was a smaller version of Sesshomaru that smiled a truly shocking thing to see. My daughter however, seemed more like me, her eyes the same emerald green, her skin soft and warm. Yet her hair, matched that of her father's and her brother's. I could not help but wonder what Satoru would think if he were to see them. Were he to look at these children, he would know immediately, had he seen Sesshomaru before, that these children were his. Though their looks were similar, was it possible that their scent was somewhat equal?

Could Satoru truly live, knowing that they were not of his blood and the blood of some other demon? Could I live, staring into Sesshomaru's eyes every day? At first I responded 'no', and then I remembered that it did not matter. No matter who they looked like, they were still beautiful, and mine, and I was forever grateful for them. It was Sesshomaru who was crazy in not wanting them, not I.

"He might not want you. But I do. I will love you forever."

Lady Kagome hurried in the room, with an expression that sent a smile to my face.

"Satoru is going crazy, Rin. Might I send him in?"

I nodded. "Of course."

Within the same second of her stepping out, Satoru stood in the door. He paused briefly before hurrying to my side, cradling his arm around us all.

"Aren't they the most beautiful things in the world?" I was still in awe.

He smiled. "I think that they have some competition... What will you name them?"

I turned to him. Names? What was I to name them? In the time of pregnancy, I had not thought of names, though at the time I was also certain that I was having one child.

"I'll name him...Itachirou." I looked down to my little boy. He stirred slightly at the name. "It's perfect, just like him."

"And the girl, Naiera. A name as beautiful as she... Itachirou and Naiera Fujian."

My head snapped to him in surprise, that name was beautiful. More importantly, he still wished to have us around, though it was more than obvious to anyone with eyes that they were not his. Surely he would not give them his name and risk the disgrace of both a mortal wife and half-demon children not of his blood.

"You would not..."

"I would." He smiled confidently. "Will you agree to remain my wife?"

"Too late to turn back." I laughed.

"Then they are our children, and I will have words with anyone, human or demon alike who dares say otherwise..."

Tears ran down my cheeks as he said our children, it was a truly beautiful thought. In the time that I had known him, he had the biggest heart, of any man that I had ever met, a heart that I had come to love.

"Thank you."

"No need for it my lady... Besides, I see no reason for thanks, being half demon; I believe they'll even out to be two times more trouble. If we survive, we'll owe each other thanks, and congratulations."

"We have our work cut out for us." I agreed.

"Imagine what it will be like when we have more children."

I shrieked. "More children!"