Hello...I've officially lost my mind...read this and see how demented I am right now, must have been those 5million packets of cheese, not.

Once upon a time Sasuke was gay.

The End- Just Kiddin

Once upon a time, well now, lived a handsome shinobi called 'Sasuke Käse Uchiha', and everyday he got out of bed, took a long hot cross bun and smashed it on his crotch, ate breakfast and trampled on his pot plant,(ILNB is the name), until it was pancake. (His pot plant is a hologram, so he ends up trampling on nothing really, but there's a hug crater in the floor)

Then he set off to smack plates into Kakashi's face, because he rejected Sasuke's invitation to his weekly gay club meetings, don'tcha wish your girlfriend was hot like sauna sweaty Jiraiya's - I mean don't ya know Sasuke has a disorder called 'iwannasmashyouwithrandomstuff'.

Naruto suddenly shows up in a sugar encrusted bikini, with extra raw meat, Sasuke's eyes shoot out and his jaw crashes to the ground and destroys Gaara's secret underground eyebrow store.

"OMG! Naruto! You look so sweet! I just want a bite of your juicy meat!!! But I'll probably get salmonella!" Sasuke cooed with gay rhymingness, a waterfall of drool spraying out of his mouth and onto Kakashi's new 'Icha Icha extra fat and old edition' which was made of steel, and rusted into a pile of pure gold (which he donated to Orochimaru's body fund).

Kiba and Akamaru strolled past, Akamaru turned up his nose and sniffed in the direction of Naruto, a maniacal look in his lil doggie eyes.

Akamaru leapt at Naruto and tore off the meat, along with the bikini, leaving Naruto confused and very naked.

Sasuke's eyeballs dropped out of their sockets and rolled all over the place like in 'Minority Report', Naruto felt Sasuke's eyes on him and indeed they were.

"IIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" Naruto shrieked as Sasuke's eyes rolled off his chest and popped back into their sockets.

Just when Naruto thought Akamaru had enough meat, a huge bubble appeared over his head, where an inner Akamaru said "A Hotdog!!!!".

Naruto knew what this meant and ran away frantically with Akamaru and Kiba on his tail, people staring with odd looks on their faces, similar to the ones I bet you have on your face right now.

Sasuke shrugged and skipped along to the Barbie girl song, his voice making the earth tremble and causing a pack of wild pigs to crush his apartment.

Sasuke then began his daily ritual, of 'pinkie dancing', where he stuck a mini hula hoop on his little finger and swirled it until he got dizzy and grew an extra buttock.

"Oh Sasuke-kun" Sakura whispered, "I like that stick of dynamite you're wearing."

"W-what stick of dynamite?!" Sasuke gasped, but it was too late, the stick of explosives in his armpit exploded. KABBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…m!!!

Then Sasuke woke up from his demented dream, and a huge pack of wild pigs fell on him.

The End.

Käse: Cheese in German,

ILNB: I love Naruto's Butt,

Sugar Encrusted bikinis, with extra meat are now available in designer shops worldwide.

...IEEE!!! I've got so much Homework to do!!!!! ¬.¬ Oh and fics to update, I've written a bit of some of them...

Review dude and you'll have the pleasure of stamping on Sasuke's plant with him in the morning.