A/N: Another Clifford story, as per hansprinsessa's suggestion. The title is from a Sherlock Holmes quote and the book of the same name (an old school text) with appropriate adjustments ;) Hope you like :)
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Daytime
Clifford was a shady devil.
It had started off innocently enough, Eric and Pam had resumed sharing a bed during the daylight hours and Clifford had taken to sleeping at the end.
Then he'd started to sneak further up the bed and, occasionally, he'd even managed to wiggle his way in between the pair.
Eric had had no major objections to this, although he did resent waking up and finding himself precariously close to the edge of the bed. Pam, however, always seemed so happy to see Clifford at the start of every evening that he'd held his peace.
Until one evening he'd woken up to find himself face down on the floor.
Moving so that he was kneeling beside the bed he glared at the offending canine who lay sprawled on his side, back to back with Pam.
"This is the last straw," Eric growled, keeping his tone low so that he didn't disturb Pam.
Clifford didn't even look up.
Eric stood up, "Get off the bed."
This time Clifford lifted his head, just enough to look at Eric over his shoulder, a bored expression on his face.
"Move it," Eric ordered, gesturing for the dog to move.
Clifford blinked and lowered his head.
Eric's patience snapped, "Clifford!"
Clifford jumped and, putting his ears back, slunk slowly off the bed. Eric watched with narrowed eyes as Clifford made a show of looking forlorn as he curled up in the corner of the room.
Still glaring at the dog, Eric climbed back under the covers of the bed. He was just about to lie down and wait for Pam to wake up, when she stretched and sat up, looking around the room.
"Why is Clifford on the floor?" Pam asked, frowning.
Eric looked over to where Clifford was giving Pam his best hard done by expression, "Because I told him to move," Eric replied, still sounding a little annoyed, "he kicked me out of bed."
Pam sniggered and Clifford looked up, wagging his tail slightly.
"It's not funny," Eric protested.
Pam tried to school her features into a serious expression, "Of course not," she agreed, before succumbing to a fit of giggles
Clifford stood up and padded his way over to Pam who leaned over to cup his face with her hands, "You didn't mean to, did you boy?" she asked him, scratching behind his ears.
Clifford's tail wagged a bit faster and he gazed up at her with wide, innocent eyes.
"Liar," Eric spat from behind her.
Pam snickered again, "Poor baby," she said indulgently and Eric wondered if she was patronising him or still talking to the dog.
He wasn't sure which option annoyed him more.
"We'll have to think of something to keep you both happy, won't we?" Pam continued, still patting Clifford and glancing over her shoulder at Eric.
Eric rolled his eyes as he flopped back against the pillows with a huff.
In hindsight, Eric should have known her quest would involve shopping and he wasn't entirely sure how he felt about her solution as he slipped into their new, king-sized bed.
He pulled her flush against his chest, trying his best to ignore the fact that Clifford was stretched out on the other side of her.
"I still don't see why you couldn't just buy him a kennel," Eric muttered.
Pam shot him a horrified look over her shoulder, "He'd get lonely."
"He's a dog."
"He's our dog," she countered.
"He's your dog," he corrected.
"Fine," she huffed, "he's my dog and I refuse to make him sleep outside. If you don't like it, sleep in your own bed."
It was Eric's turn to huff and he tightened his hold on her, Pam smirked.
"Then you'll just have to learn to share," she told him sweetly as she closed her eyes.
Eric waited until he was sure she was 'asleep' before he narrowed his eyes at Clifford, "This isn't over," he warned him.
Clifford looked nonplussed by Eric's ire and, the next evening, Eric woke to find that Clifford had wormed his way into Pam's embrace, loosening Eric's hold on her in the process.
This time the look Clifford gave him was positively triumphant.
Eric narrowed his eyes, "Definitely not over."