AUTHOR'S NOTE OF D00M
An AU fanfic written half by me, half by Mandy Pants
Chapter one basically introduces the two main characters, Akasuna Sasori and Iwa Deidara.
In this chapter, I wrote the part of Sasori, Mandy Pants wrote the part of Deidara.
This fanfic is a yaoi fic, DeiSaso (Yeah, she uke-ized me -.-), with some ItaDei and TobiDei and several other background pairings including, but not limited to, SasuGaa, one-way SakuSasu, and TemaShika.
ALSO NOTE-- I've done something with Sasori's Hiruko and Sandaime that I've never seen done before- I made them real, living people, his rommates and best friends; Hiruko is very protective of Sasori, while Sandaime is more of the straight-forward punch-a-guy's-lights-out sort of guardian. (Sandaime is also THUPER GAY. A serious flame)
And I decided that since Deidara calls Sasori "Danna" instead of "Master", that Sasori will be calling Deidara "warugaki" instead of the translated "brat".
All characters in this chapter (c) Kishimoto Masashi
The main location is School of the Arts in Rochester, NY
Sasori walked down the hallway past the row of lockers and the many kids to his left, he was heading to the dance floor to skip 3rd period, his eyes were plastered to his notebook, trying to memorize all the different substances he needed to steal from the chemistry lab.
Deidara was headed to the same floor, with the same intentions. He was looking up at the ceiling talking, absentmindedly on his cellphone. Not paying attention to anyone in front of him, everyone in the school had a habit of staying out of his way.
Sasori turned left and headed down the stairwell, down two flights, then a little further down the hall and back up one, he was on the 4th floor when he started, and was headed to the 3rd. As he emerged from the stairwell to enter the door to the dance hall he slammed right into the most popular kid in the high school, knocking whatever had been in their hands at the time, and themselves, onto the floor.
"Watch it dumb ass!" Deidara spat before catching a glimpse at the other boy. Upon realizing who he had bumped into Deidara felt a tang of guilt, but brushed it off, and picked up his things. Sasori just sat in a daze for a while, before looking around to find his pile of notebooks, and the jubilee of pens that had fallen from his pocket.
"Sorry," He mumbled as he lifted his possessions back up into his hands and, deciding he would memorize the chemicals later, began walking lopsided down the hallway to his favorite corner of the dance floor. Deidara plopped down right against the wall he had fallen near. He had just remember that he was on the phone, and held it up to his ear to hear one of his best friends, Kisame, screaming at him to say something.
"Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, shove it, Shark boy,un!" He spat into the phone frustrated.
"Y' know Deidara, I don't see how you're so popular, you're a complete asshole!" Kisame screamed through the phone quite audibly.
"Well. Tell that to my fanboys and fangirls maybe they'll leave me the fuck alone for once,un!" Deidara screamed back even louder. Sasori looked up from the Stephen King book he was reading and stared at the blonde boy who was screeching into a cellphone.
"Hey," he said across the hall, "you're gonna get caught if you keep yelling like that..."
"Un?" The blonde looked up, and studied the other boy. Losing his apathetic composure for a few moments and smiling lightly, he quickly pulled himself back together and snapped, "What's it to you,un?" Sasori shrank back against the wall, the same bored expression on his face he had had on all day, and turned his attention back to 'Cujo', deciding to ignore the sour remark that had just been shot his way. Deidara stuck out his tongue at the redhead childishly and hung up his cellphone. "Hey, kid, un!" He called across the hall.
"Hmm?" Sasori said without looking up from his book. It then registered in his mind that the blonde had just called him 'kid'. "And I'm not a kid, ya warugaki." Deidara stood up feeling threatened.
"What are you, a 7th grader, un?" He slowly walked over to Sasori, with his fists clenched at his side. Sasori didn't even bother to look up.
"I'm a 10th grader," he said. "What're you?"
"Hmph" Deidara grunted, annoyed at the red-head's nerve. "I'm...a freshman,un, but don't think that makes me weak or anything!" Sasori smiled inwardly at his minor triumph.
"What class're you skippin, warugaki?" He asked, hardly interested.
"Stop calling me warugaki, and I might find the kindness in my heart to tell you, un" Deidara folded his arms, staring down at the smaller boy, wishing that he would get the satisfaction to see him get pissed off. Sasori shrugged his shoulders.
"I get the feeling it's something like health anyways, you learnin about STDs this year or something, right?" He had closed his book and set it aside and looked up with that same bored expression that seemed to be glued to his face.
"Gym, actually, un," Sasori's apathy tore away Deidara's smug disposition, "and...If you must know, I didn't go because I'm sick of being harassed my my 'Fans', or whatever the hell they call themselves, un."
"Ooooh popular guy, hmm?" Sasori said with sarcastic interest. "What's it like to be known and loved throughout the school?"
"Horrid, un." Deidara sighed and let himself plop down next to Sasori "They won't leave me alone...the girls won't even acknowledge when I tell them I'm gay..." He looked down at his black combat boots. Sasori sniggered.
"My lil cousin's boyfriend has the same problem down in the middle school. His name's Sasuke, my lil cuz pays me a buck every time I take time out of my day to save the little emo warugaki."
"Sa...Suke? You mean Uchiha, un? I think that's my best friend's little brother..." Deidara looked at the ceiling trying to remember the details about his friend, Itachi's, young sibling.
"Yeah, Uchiha Sasuke, that's him. Big cockatoo hair, always wears shirts with neck bands that cover up to his nose, always glomped by fans... in fact one of them has hair very eerily resembling yours, are you two related..?" Sasori was speaking of, of course, Yamanaka Ino.
"Uhh...I don't think I have any family here, un. Then again, a blonde ponytail isn't that uncommon. Anyway...what's your name... It's weird we've talked this much and I don't even know your name,un."
"Akasuna Sasori," The redhead said. "What's yours, waru--... kid?"
"Deidara...Just...Deidara. I'll never use my last name, so don't bother learning it, un" He leaned back on the wall. "Sooo...uh...?"
"Heh, ok then Deidara. So you know Uchiha Itachi?"
"Yeah, we like to refer to each other as alter egos, even though I haven't known him very long, So...What, about your friends, who do you hang out with?" He questioned hoping that the redhead had friends, so as not to embarrass him.
"... Well..." Sasori didn't really have any friends in the school, just his roommates that lived in his apartment with him. "I don't really... none that go here anyways... I do have Hiruko and Sandaime but they don't go here, anymore anyways."
"Oh...S-Sorry, un... I actually have very few friends, or, real friends anyway, un" Deidara's hand brushed over Sasori's accidentally, and he blushed and quickly moved it away. Sasori didn't even notice the light touch.
" 'S ok. A lot of populars have very few real friends. Like Sasuke only has Naruto, Sakura, and my lil cuz, and I guess Hatake-sensei. But Hatake-sensei is everyone's friend, he's so laid-back," Sasori said, remembering the time he had gotten caught by said teacher, Hatake Kakashi, and had been let off the hook with little more than a warning that it would go on his record that he was absent in that class. Kakashi hadn't even made him go to class.
"Why do you refer to me as 'popular', un?"
"Well, you are. Only popular kids have fangirls and guys." Sasori said, glancing up at the digital clock that hung on the ceiling of the hallway. A couple of middle school kids running late to class hustled by them unacknoledgably.
"But It's not like I want to be. Dammit how do I make them leave me alone,un?!" Deidara yelled forgetting that they needed to be quiet.
"Shut up you idiot. I'm too short for them to think I'm a 10th grader on a free period!" Sasori said, his head swinging from left to right hurriedly to make sure no teachers were coming out to see what all the racket was about. Making it worse, he wasn't on a free period. All his periods were full, mostly of art classes, and he was skipping... hey, he was skipping gym this period too, wow.
"Sorry...I just...I would do anything to make them leave me alone, un..." Deidara scratched the back of his head, sighing softly, and glancing up at the clock. Sasori chuckled.
"So does that mean I should be happy for being an outcast?" he asked.
"Outcast? Really? I woulda thought you would at least talk to some people, I mean...I met you like 10 minutes ago, and I'm already baring my soul to you, am I the only one,un?" Deidara asked disregarding the question.
"Heh, no one talks to me. They say I'm too weird, and beyond that, anti-social. Which, don't get me wrong, is all completely true, I spend most of my time making puppets, poisons and the such." He grabbed up his notebook and showed Deidara the ingredients to a poison that would make someone sick to their stomache for a week straight.
"That's scary..." Deidara scootched away slightly. Sasori grinned evilly, before pulling the same poison in a vial from his bag and swishing it around lightly. It was a red-orange substance, and it smelled very hot.
"I sell them to people who want to pull pranks on other people. Sasuke's friend Uzumaki Naruto bought some vomit-inducing poison from me just the other day."
"Um..." Deidara scootched further away "I...I..." Deidara was stricken with fear. Sasori blinked at him.
"What's wrong..?" Sasori asked, his head cocked to the side.
"Y-You're a-a little scary...to be honest,un" He stuttered out, his muscles rippling through the bottom of his half-Fish-net shirt. Sasori blinked once more, he turned and put the poison back into his bag. He pulled out another, this one a light yellow and smelling of lemon.
"This one is the reverse," he said, still frowning. Deidara tilted his head to the right.
"So I assume you love Chemistry class, eh,un?" He tried to cover up his emotions.
"Hah, you kidding? I hate that place, I just use it as my supplier." Sasori placed the yellow liquid back into his bag and threw his notebook back on top of the pile of random notebooks. The one it landed on said 'Sasori's blueprints, you are not to touch'.
"Blueprints,un?" Deidara asked curiously, subconsciously taking off the jacket that just barely made his outfit follow the dress code. "What are you making,un?"
"Nothing that concerns you," Sasori snapped, his face turning stern, his voice sounding very defensive. He looked up at the clock. 'The class has only been going for 15 minutes?' he though to himself.
"O...kay..." Deidara fixed his fishnet shirt over his stomach, and tightened the ponytail on the top of his head. "I hate this fricking school,un" He tried to change the subject. Sasori's face turned back to it's normal bored look.
"Yeah, me too. Although New Years's comin' up, that's always fun." His mind was filled with nasty poisons he could slip into the festive treats of some people he especially didn't like. Such as Orochimaru the computer teacher. Sasori shivered noticeably.
"Why are you shivering,un?" Deidara asked putting a hand softly on Sasori's shoulder. Sasori looked up at the taller blonde.
"No reason..." he said, trying to shake his thoughts away. "... Have you ever had Orochimaru-sensei as a computer teacher..?"
"Yeah, I hate him, he looks at me in odd ways, un..." Deidara mumbled, fidgeting uncomfortably.
"Y.. yeah... has he ever... done anything worse to you..?" Sasori asked, his eyes growing a little larger. Deidara squirmed a little tilting his head down, looking as if he was making a decision. He was silent for a minute.
"No,un" He said abruptly.
"He's done it with a few people... like Kabuto... and even tried with Sasuke... and..." Sasori gulped audibly. "Me." Deidara's head shot up to look at Sasori. He scanned the smaller boy.
"Wh-what? What has he done? " Sasori looked away from Deidara.
"It doesn't matter," he said quietly. "You only just met me anyways, why do you care..?"
"I don't know..." Deidara came to that realization and stood up quickly "You're right...I shouldn't care,un. Nice meeting you...Sasori-Danna." With that he casually walked across the hall and kicked open the bathroom door, trudging inside. Sasori blinked and sat there for a while, then gathered up his stuff and timidly shuffled over to the bathroom door. He tried pushing it open with one finger, that didn't work, so he slowly opened with his whole hand.
"Deidara?" he called in quietly. Deidara was at the sink applying eyeliner to his eyelid, and turned to see Sasori.
"Yeah, what's up, un?" Sasori walked in and dropped his stuff uncaringly on the floor in the corner (Luckily none of the vials of poison broke), and walked over next to Deidara, pulling out a mascara container, and began applying it.
"Why'd you call me 'Sasori-Danna'?" he asked.
"I don't know" Deidara laughed lightly, putting his eyeliner in the pocket of his tight black pants. "You just seem respectable, I guess" He scratched the back of his head. Sasori chuckled lightly.
"Your a whole head taller than me," he said, screwing the applier back onto the tube of liquid and walking over to compare the heights of the two. He looked up into the eyes of the blonde, one eyebrow cocked, a slight grin on his face. "How do I seem respectable to you?"
"You seem way too wise and mature for high school, unlike me, I'll always be an 8 year old inside, un!!" He laughed. "And... Uh...Sasori-Danna,un...?"
"Hmm?" Sasori held back a bout of laughter.
"You don't have to answer this if you don't want to..." He trailed off, the smile leaving his face.
"Spit it out, kid." Sasori said, a small smile forming on his face.
"I was just wondering...are you gay?" He looked away "I mean, there aren't many straight guys who wear mascara, un..." Sasori blinked at the blonde, and began chuckling.
"No, Deidara, I'm not gay..." He paused. "I'm bi... Why do you ask?"
"The whole mascara thing...Just curiosity...I have a curious nature, I guess, un," he said blushing and scratching the back of his head nervously. "I meant nothing by it, un."
"Ok then, kid." Sasori found his eyes trailing down from the blonde's face to his body, his black shirt barely covering his chest, the fishnet under not covering much of the rest of his torso. He stared at the muscles so plainly visible, Deidara wasn't lanky, but he wasn't exactly ripped either.
"Stop calling me a kid, Danna, un." He pouted, frustrated with being underestimated. Sasori chuckled lightly.
"Heh, ok ki- I mean Deidara." He looked back up at the blonde's face, a serious look suddenly set on his face. "So, Orochimaru-sensei has never touched you or anything right?" He said out of the blue.
"N-No,un" Deidara stuttered out nervously. Turning back to the mirror above the sink he dug through his pockets for anything that he could use to distract himself. The first thing he found was chap stick, and he began applying it frantically.
"Kay, cause if he did... I could help you, ya know." Sasori said, motioning to his bag of poisons.
"Oh...Okay..." He tried to avoid talking too much. He leaned on the sink, sticking the chap stick back into his pocket. "That's not a very pleasant subject...we should talk about something else...liiiiiiiike...Hmm...Do you have a boyfriend or a girlfriend,un?" Deidara had a look of pure innocence on his face.
"The fuck? Me? In a relationship? I told you earlier I had no friends, why would I have a girl or boyfriend?" he said, a look of pure amazement on his face.
"I don't know, I just...in some ways I can't imagine you with a significant other...but in other ways I can't imagine you without one,un!" The blonde kicked a random peace of crumpled paper across the floor.
"Actually..." Sasori put his hand to his chin in thought. "My roommate Sandaime asked me out about a month ago... but I don't like him like that."
"Really? Why don't you like him,un?" Deidara pressed for information, disregarding his common sense which was telling him to 'shut the hell up'.
"Eh, I've just known him for so long, he's too much of a friend."
"Oh." He tilted his head to the left and looked around the blank white walls. "This place looks so...dead, un..."
"Well... it's a bathroom..." Sasori mumbled, mildly amused.
"But...It's not interesting at all,un...:" He seemed way too frustrated over this. "It feels so...naked..."
"Deidara, I doubt anyone really takes the time to scan the public bathrooms..." Sasori said, letting a small laugh out.
"Good point...I guess. The bell is gonna ring soon now,un..." Deidara pulled his iPod out of his pocket, moving his hair from over his left eye, revealing what appeared to be a mechanic replacement for an eye. He scanned the time carefully, before shoving the iPod back into his pocket and grimacing. "Yup, about 5 more minutes,un." Sasori looked at the left side of Deidara's face with amazement.
"What the hell..?" He started.
"What,un?" Deidara looked up in confusion.
"Y-... Your eye..." Sasori stepped forward and reached out to touch the mechanical mechanism on Deidara's left eye. Deidara's instincts quickly reacted, he swatted Sasori's hand out of the way, and covered his left eye with his hair once again.
"Sorry. It...It's a touchy subject,un," he said, leaning against the wall
"Oh... I see." Sasori said. He looked at Deidara uncomfortably for a few seconds before he grabbed the bottom of his hoodie and lifted it off, revealing his bare chest which held a plethora of mechanical contraptions. A pacemaker for his heart, his right arm was mechanical, his neck held a scar half way around making it seem as though he had almost been beheaded, and several other contraptions here and there. "I have metal parts too," he said sadly. Deidara looked at Sasori's body in amazement, as well as speechless-ness. He sighed.
"If it's not too much to as-" He was interrupted mid-sentence by the bell ringing through the halls. "...We should probably go to our next classes,un..." The blonde shifted towards the door.
"Yeah..." Sasori lifted his hoodie back over his head and grabbed his things and began heading to his next class, English.