Summary: Lillie loved her mother. She did! Really! But then, why was she so, so difficult to deal with? Follow Lillie's trek through Kanto, as she tries to make her broken family a little more whole again. One-Shot, Sun/Moon centric.
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"Lillie...Heh...when did you start becoming beautiful?"
Lillie would always remember that moment. When her mother lifted up her cold hands to her face, and became the mother she remembered. The one she loved. Not that she didn't love her mother the way she was now, but it was nice to be hit with the sense of nostalgia, as memories of her childhood fought their way to the front of her mind. To her mother, beauty was everything. For her mother, to complement her, Lillie, the daughter who was always just mediocre, just painfully average, meant the world to her.
It was there, in that moment, that she decided to help her mother, her family, in any way that she could. No matter what, Lillie would be there for her. For once in her life, she could do something to directly help a loved one, instead of being forced into a support role. It was a nice feeling.
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Sometimes, Lusamine had her bad days. The days where she would act like Lillie made absolutely no progress at all. The days when she would shout and scream, and hurt Lillie in ways a mother shouldn't, with bitter words that stung, and slaps to match them. Lillie would always try to tough it out, reminding herself that her mother still loved her.
Hearing her mother complain about her so freely was...disheartening… to say the least. She would clamor and fume about her useless, ugly daughter. How Lillie was a 'good for nothing child who should've disappeared with that bastard of a husband'. It hurt her, like it always hurt her.
But she refused to break.
No, she was not useless. No, she was not ugly. No! She refused to bend under her mother's will, and she was damn proud to admit that she was her mother's daughter! She inherited the same ferocious tenacity displayed by Lusamine, and would use it! She would not give in!
And even as the night wore on, and Lusamine's taunting jeers dissolved into mad, incoherent ramblings, Lillie hung on tight. Embracing her mother with all she had, hoping, wishing, yearning for the motherly love she craved, knowing all the same that she would be denied. But despite all this, she knew what her priorities were. Her mother's fragile sanity was far more important than any childish dream she had latched onto. If not for her sake, then for Gladion's. He, out of everybody, deserved a happy ending. But with their father who abandoned them, and their mother who had enough problems trying to recover, and Gladion, the emotionally stunted, angsty teenager, the job fell to Lillie to be the mediator.
And so, Lillie became a frail thread, stitching her broken family back together.
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But Lusamine wasn't the only one with problems. Sometimes, Lillie felt like she wasn't enough. She couldn't stop her mother from becoming a monster, she couldn't stop her brother from running off, and while she knew her father's desertion wasn't her fault, it still felt like it, and she shouldered the blame for their lack of a father all by herself.
There were days when Lillie could feel the guilt pressing down on her. It was a heavy, oppressing pressure resting on her heart, and nothing she ever did made it better. Sure, she could laugh it off during the daytime, when she had the responsibility to take care of her mother, but the night! Oh, Lillie hated the night. After carefully coaxing her mother to bed, she would be all alone, with no reason to hold up a mask.
She would let her façade slip, and she would sob. With no one there to tell her any different, she would blame herself for everything. Words would swirl around in her head, twisting themselves into something different. I trust you became You traitor, and I love you became I hate you. How could her friend like such a weak, pathetic, powerless, helpless thing like her?
Lillie knew that tomorrow held no reprieve. She would get up, and be forced to repeat it all over again. But that was okay. These moments might not be healthy, but she needed them. And sometimes, her mother would smile a genuine smile over something that she said, and Lillie would know that it was all worth it. All the pain, all the sleepless nights, and all the doubt. And in the haunting glow of the moonlight, she wept herself to sleep.
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Despite all her family's faults, Lille loved them. They were hers after all.
Even with her father, who abandoned them the minute Lillie was born.
Even Gladion, with his with his harsh words, and cold philosophies.
And even Lusamine. She loved her mother despite her jeering, despite her taunting, despite her inadequacies.
But with each of their faults, there were so, so many strengths.
She was always told that her father was a strong, kind man. A misunderstood adult, overwhelmed by the responsibilities of parenthood. Lillie couldn't fault him for that, and she desperately hoped to find him again within her lifetime.
She loved her brother, and she knew he loved her. He just had a hard time expressing it. But throughout her entire adventure in Alola, he was fiercely protective of her. She had always appreciated that.
And her mother. Oh god, her mother. Where should she start? For every insult, there was a compliment to match it. For every slap, a loving caress. But no matter what, she always wanted the best for Lillie. No matter how she showed it, everything she did was to help Lillie.
So Lillie decided to help them back.
That's why she moved to the Kanto region. She had heard rumors that her father had disappeared there, far away from Alola. If she found him, her mother's healing would be easier. And when Lillie got both of her parents back, she would bring them back to Alola. Back to Alola, to meet Hau, and Professor Kukui, and Selene, and Gladion.
Finally, finally, they would be a family again. Lusamine as the beautiful mother, Gladion as the prickly older brother, and her dad as, well, her dad. She had never really met him, but she knew he would be great. They would be all together, and they would be everything she needed.
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As Lillie reflected upon her current situation, she realized that no matter what, she would never regret her decision. Even if she was given the chance to do it all over again, she wouldn't change a thing. All her mistakes made her who she was. All her successes reminded her of who helped along the way. All her decisions were important, and she could think of no better outcome for her.
Sure, Lusamine was difficult to deal with. Sure, she missed her friends so much it hurt. But in time, Lillie knew. She knew that everything would be okay again. Lusamine's mind would be restored. They would move back to Alola. She would live the rest of her life surrounded by friends and family, content with no more massive, world threatening crises to deal with.
All would be made right with the world, and Lillie was okay with that.
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A/N: So this was a really random one-shot I was inspired to write after my three day spree of playing Sun and Moon. In my opinion, it was easily one of my favorite Pokemon games, up there along with Platinum and Black.
A few thing I should clarify:
Selene is the official canon name of the female protagonist for Sun and Moon. I chose to include Selene instead of Elios, not because I'm sexist, but because I played the games as a girl. It just feels better to me this way.
I know there have been theories about Lillie's father being Mohn, from Poke Pelago, but I choose to pretty much ignore that for this story. It makes more sense in my story this way, and I left her father to be undetermined. Hell, you can imagine him as Red if you want.
A lot of Lillie's insecurities and struggles are based off of my own experiences with my parents. Of course, I exaggerated here and there, and I still am lucky enough to have both my parents, but the similarities are still there. I know a lot of my friends have the same problems, so if you feel a connection to Lillie's plight, just know that you are not alone.
Thanks for humoring me enough to actually read this, and don't hesitate to message me if you have any questions.
~Kurotsuki563