My Dear Brother, Kohaku
Summary:
All this time, she denied that she needed him. She was a slayer; she didn't need anything but her weapon. She couldn't need him, she couldn't feel attached. Now that he's gone, she needs him more than ever.
Author's Note:
This is a one shot fan fiction to the Song "Whisper" by Evanescence. Also, it is a one-shot; not an ongoing story. Please I absolutely love reviews, but not the ones saying update soon! When it is a one-shot. Still, I hope you enjoy the story and still I want those reviews! Oh, also, for anyone reading Inner Rhythm or Letters To A Traveling Soldier those updates will be soon. I'm rewriting a lot of Inner Rhythm, but Letters should be updated by tomorrow at the latest.
Song
Story
Disclaimer:
You know the deal. I do not own InuYasha, and it sucks. (If I could you all know I'd lock him in my basement)
My Dear Brother, Kohaku
Falling, that's all she seemed to do now, was fall. Everything she knew was collapsing and she was diminishing along with it. It seemed as if that's all she was able to do anymore. Fall, and hope someone would save her. She wasn't always like this, she used to be so strong. It's amazing she's almost completely gone. She thinks it started when she let one man see into her heart, her soul, her only weakness. She thinks that if she never let him in, she would still be strong. She thinks that if, maybe, just maybe, she never met him; things would be okay. She wasn't supposed to need him the way she does, she wasn't supposed to feel this way, she was a slayer. She had been taught never to love, that was her father's mistake; and now it was hers as well. She had denied all these years that she really truly needed him, but the cold truth that scared her so much was the fact that she did.
Catch me as I fall
Say you're here and it's all over now
She cried, long, loud wails of grief. The trees moaned in response to this beauty's obvious sorrow, giving what comfort they could. As she clutched her hand to her chest, she tried to stop the pain, tried to make it all go away. She was falling again.
Speaking to the atmosphere
No ones here and I fall into myself
As the feeling came gradually back into her feet, she fell to the ground, huddled in a ball, trying with all her might to make the pain leave her in peace for once. Just once, she wanted to be able to feel happy again, was she not meant to feel joy? Was the only emotion the Gods allowed her to experience was pain? What had she done that was so horrible, did they think she was strong? She used to be strong, before Kohaku. Kohaku was going to be a great slayer, the whole village knew that. Father was so proud, you could practically see his chest swell with pride. It was understandable, too, his daughter was the best slayer in the village, and his son wouldn't be far behind her. Things were perfect then, until Naraku. Funny thing was, she didn't blame Naraku. Naraku was a poor lost soul who had lost his only love he gave his soul trying to save. Naraku didn't make Kohaku's sword plunge through Kagome's frail body. Sure, he was a major factor, but it was Kohaku that did the deed. It was Kohaku who wasn't strong enough. Kohaku had never lived up to his potential, and most likely never will.
This truth drives me into madness
I know I can stop the pain if I will it all away
If I will it all away
She knew, that as her cries softened, she would have to kill her only living sibling. InuYasha was wrong, there isn't any hope, there never was; and never will be. If Kohaku couldn't stop himself from killing Father and Kirara he wasn't capable of ever stopping. She is pained by this, this cruel reality. She realizes that since her mobility is fully returned to her, she has no reason to wait. She knows she must act quickly before Kohaku does anymore un-repairable damage. But still, she hesitates. She was once strong, but never strong enough to kill one of her own. She knows that she must do it, but can she do it?
Don't turn away
Don't give into the pain
Don't try to hide
Though they're screaming your name
Don't close your eyes
God knows what lies behind them
Don't turn out the light
Never sleep
Never die
She wrings her hands, nervously, as she searches for her brother. No, not brother, he was no longer Kohaku, he was a monster. Her weapon, ready, eyes and ears, alert, all she had to do was wait. Soon enough, she heard not trying to be discreet footsteps. Kohaku was coming closer. She saw him, and everything came back. She was falling again.
Murdering Father
Attempts to kill her
Annihilating an entire village
Obeying Naraku
Injuring Kagome
Murdering Shippo
Murdering Kagome
Murdering InuYasha
Murdering Kirara
Finally, murdering Miroku.
She knows she's crying, just as one knows they're being watched. She can't feel the tears, but she knows they're there. She doesn't even wipe them away, she just lets them fall. It matches everything she's known. She knew she should be falling, but she stands her ground. She wants to be strong again, she has to be. She is not familiar with uncertainty, she wasn't supposed to be. Slayers are confident, she would be a slayer one more time.
I'm frightened by what I see
But somehow I know that there's much more to come
Immobilized by my fear
And soon to be blinded by tears
I can stop the pain if I will it all away
If I will it all away
She knew she should wait for his move, she knew he was waiting for her. She also knew that in battle, she became impatient and rash. Nothing like a slayer. She knew to be a slayer again she had to wait, and had to think things through. She would be a slayer again, it was her calling. So, she waited. He waited. They waited. She knew her binding chains were breaking, she couldn't hold out much longer. He lunged. She ducked. Thank God. The battle had begun.
Don't turn away
Don't give into the pain
Don't try to hide
Though they're screaming your name
Don't close your eyes
God knows what lies behind them
Don't turn out the light
Never sleep
Never die
She knew this battle would be the battle to end her life. But she did not fear death, something all slayers did. She knew that was one simple thing separated her from all other slayers, made her strong: she did not fear death. She smiled at this, she knew she would die today, but she wouldn't die alone. Finally, her opportunity arose, she knew she had to act now; so she did. Slayers instinct, seize the moment. She laughed, she was a slayer again. The moment Kohaku hit the ground, the blankness of his eyes bled into pain. She was braced for this, Naraku was letting him die alone, alone in his pain. But he wasn't going to die alone, she was going to stay.
Fallen angels at my feet
Whispered voices at my ear
She had won. She was strong, though not independent, but still strong. She was a slayer, lying next to her prey and in the midst of death. She could feel death's way of creeping onto Kohaku, and did nothing to stop it. Before death's final sweep, Kohaku whispered a mournful farewell.
"Ai'shierttu, Anueue."
Death before my eyes
Lying next to me I fear
She was falling again. She knew that as Kohaku's last breath left his lungs, hers would too. While this battle didn't kill her in the sense that she no longer had a beating heart or working lungs, it killed her soul. She could no longer feel emotion, even pain; as the Gods so wish. She knew that the sensible thing was to take her own life, but she was rash and impatient Sango. She wasn't meant to be a slayer.
She beckons me shall I give in
Upon my end shall I give in
Forsaken all I've fallen for I rise to meet the end.
Okay, now to clear up some possible questions:
-How come Sango wanted to be a slayer then didn't?
--Sango wanted to be a slayer for the strength, she thought being a slayer was what she was meant for. After the battle, she realized she couldn't be cool and calculated and not feel love like a slayer, so she chose not to be one.
-What does "Ai'shierttu, Aneue" mean?
--It means, "I love you, Sister" in Japanese.
-Why was she immobilized?
--Her body was reacting to the shock of everyone being murdered.
-When was she never a slayer?
--I like to think that when she joined the group, she became sloppy because she was on a team, everyone had each other's backs. She never had to worry, and slayers work alone and never get sloppy.
If there are more, I'll respond to your review! PLEASE REVIEW!
Ja ne,
Tairoru