It was late night. Team Hebi was traveling, and had dexided to stop for the night in a forest clearing to sleep. Sasuke had a fire going, and he, Suigetsu and Juugo are all sitting around it. Karin's sleeping off to the side.
"Sasuke."
No answer.
"Sasuke." Louder this time.
No answer.
"Dammnit, Uchiha, I'm talking to you!"
That got his attention.
"What, Suigetsu, what?" He asked. "I'm hungry," Suigetsu huffed. Sasuke rolled his eyes. "So eat, stupid."
"But I'm out of food."
"So ask Juugo."
"I did. He has none."
"Ask Karin."
"No way! Are you stupid? She's sleeping!"
Sasuke pondered this. It was true, Karin was ferocious when her sleep was disturbed. Even with the risk of Juugo going absolutely batshit crazy didn't stop her from going to strangle him when he woke her up. Sasuke glanced at the redhead's form. Then he looked slightly to the left of her.
It was Karin's bag.
Suigetsu followed his gaze. His eyes went wide. "Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no! Are you insane? That's her bag! You know how Karin is with her bag!" Sasuke shrugged. "Then starve." He turned away from the ex-water nin. Suigetsu sighed. He was really, really hungry. And Karin looked to be in deep sleep. Okay. Okay, he would risk it. He would look into Karin's bag for food. Suicide? Maybe. Only if she woke up. Which he was hoping wouldn't happen.
Slowly, he got up and started walking in the general direction of the forbidden bag. Really, really quietly, he grabbed her bag. It was purple and white. Sasuke and Juugo looked up as he sat down with the goods. "... You do realize what you just did, right?" Juugo asked. "I'm staving; okay?" Suigetsu snapped back. "Unless you plan on eating the bag, I suggest you open it." Sasuke said, looking mildly bemused.
Suigetsu took in a deep breath. Very dramatic music played from somehere as he gripped the zipper. "Okay, here I go!" He said, pumping himself up to do what was no doubt an act that would eventually found out. He carefully opened it. The other males around the fire leaned in. Suigetsu looked inside. And was unimpressed. "I sort of assumed the food would be on top..." He mumbled. "Then dig deeper. Dumbass." Sasuke-the-oh-so-cool-emo-who-wore-a-duck's-ass-as-hair said. Suigetsu scowled. "Okay, so I will," He smirked. He had just gotten an idea.
He dumped the bag out on the forest floor.
Juugo and Sasuke both looked like the wind had been knocked out of them. Suigetsu looked smug. "Let's see..." He said, looking through the contents. He foung a small, pink rectangle-shaped case. "Oi, Sasuke, does this look like a lunch box to you?" He asked, picking up the case and examining it. "I'm not sure," he said honestly, "Open it." Suigetsu nodded. When he opened it, several small clyandrical packages fell into his outstretched hand. They quickly realized what those packages were. "Holy-eww! Sasuke, do you know what these are?" Suigetsu asked, throwing the packages down and raising his voice more than one octave. "Yes, I do! Now shut the hell up!" Sasuke snapped. All three of them looked at Karin. She didn't seem to be at all disturbed by the shouting. That was good. They would all live a little longer.
"Ne, Sasuke? Is this why Karin's been even bitchier than usual? 'Cause she's on her... You know..." Suigetsu mumbled. "Her period?" Juugo asked, oblivious to Sasuke and Suigetsu's akwardness around the topic. "...Yeah. Err, her period." Sasuke said, not making eye contact with anyone there. Suigetsu looked traumatized.
He looked down at her bag again. "O-okay, now I know to not touch that," He said as he began to root through her stuff again. His hand closed around a small, leopard-print bundle of fabric. He was about to toss it aside when Sasuke piped up. "What," he asked, "the Hell. Is that?" Suigetsu looked at his hand again. "I don't know." He unrolled the tiny bundle. From that came a tiny thong, and a bra with holes placed strategically where the nipples would have been. "Dear lord," Sasuke said. "Damn, woman! Who knew she was so kinky, right Sasuke?" Suigetsu asked, examining the clothing items happily. Juugo had stopped listening at this point, apparently not wanting to take part in the illegal acts going on here.
"Dumbass! Put that back before she gets up!"
"Why?"
"Because I refuse to be blamed for your stupid ideas, that's why!"
Suigetsu shrugged and tossed the fabrics aside, content to continue into his search. He next pulled up a pink bag. "Oi, Sasuke, this looks like a lunch bag, right?" He asked, holding up the parcel so his team mate could see as well. "I-I guess so," He said, apparently a little horrified of what their group's female was capable of. Suigetsu wasted no time opening up the bag to root through it.
"Lipgloss, blush, eyeliner... No foo- Hey, Uchiha."
"Mm?"
"- The hell is this?"
Sasuke looked up to see what he was holding up. It was small, metal... And looked painful. The end was slightly curved. There were springs attached. Suigetsu turned it over in the flickering light of the fire, a look of pure horror evident on his features. Sasuke looked equally mortified. "I don't... What is this... I don't even... What?"
Slowly, Suigetsu put the object back in the bag, and carefully reloaded the contents of it, seeming to have forgot his original mission. "Suigetsu, what if she notices her bag's messed up?" Sasuke aksed nervously. "A bear got at it." Sasuke looked at the bag, now back in it's original spot courtesy of Suigetsu. It didn't look like it was got at by a bear, but it was good enough.
"Guys, how about we go to sleep and forget any of this ever happened?" Juugo asked, finally breaking his silence. Both guys looked at eachother and nodded. They all went to their respective spots and lay down. They all looked to be asleep, but in reality, they were all thinking abou the horror that was Karin and her bag. Yes, this would never be spoken of again.
Ever.
•••End•••
A/N: That last thing was an eyelash curler, my friend asked me to put that in. Early birthday present for a non-member friend (Love you, Katie!) And Karin had some food. It was hidden in her other tampon case. That being said, I actually had something similar happen to me once. Cottage. Lost power. Dumb guy friends ate all the food in the drive up. Went through the girl's bags. Found our tampons.
We pretended not to notic