The usual crowd was hanging out at Shorty's, the usual crowd except from the two loud women sitting at the bar having a... friendly argument.
"You told me my ass was- and I quote- "top shelf"- and now you're, what? Banging my sister?"
"You were the one who told me that- and I quote- "Waverly should be hanging out with you," sooooo," Nicole's eyes glinted with mischief as drew out the word, "Can't fault me for taking your advice."
Wynonna's attempt at a rebuttal was cut off by a yell from behind the bar.
"Wait!"
Waverly had finally appeared, hair slightly dishevelled from running her hand through it so many times after dealing with stressful (read: drunk) customers. She narrowed her eyes at her girlfriend and sister.
"When were you two hanging out talking about butts and me?" Her pointed finger flicked between the two of them. "You two don't hang out together."
"First of all, we do so hang out, what think we are doing here when we sit and drink? We're buddies now," Wynonna raised her hand for a high five but Nicole just snorted instead of reciprocating, "Fine, be that way." She turned back to her sister, "Second of all, we had a great talk about butts and you when we were getting drunk at the police station while you were throwing the world's most unsuccessful engagement party for Chrissy Nedry."
"You two got drunk in the police station!" She turned scandalised to her girlfriend, "I thought you were better than that Nicole, what if Nedry had caught you?"
The ginger cop shrugged her shoulder and gave a noncommittal grunt. "What can I say? Sometimes pining over cute girls makes me do crazy things-" Nicole leaned across the bar to poke Waverly's nose, "Although you wouldn't know because I only pine over you from afar." The compliment took any of the angry wind out of Waverly's figurative sails and literal body as she deflated and bashfully grinned at her charming officer.
"Damn, a complete 180," Wynonna stared wide eyed at her drinking partner, "Forget Officer Hot Stuff, I'm calling you Officer Smooth from now on."
"You might never have had this problem, Earp, but with a name like Haught you either win the game of innuendoes or you are resigned to spend your life a blushing mess," she sent her dimpled smile at a blushing Waverly, who immediately tried to look anywhere but her girlfriend, eyes eventually settling on her smirking sister, "And Waverly can tell you from her first-hand experience, I am smooth, calm and collected when flirting with cute girls." Nicole's smile turned lascivious as she knocked her hand against the beer tap in front of her, "Calm and collected even when they wearing a low cut top that is soaking wet with beer."
Wynonna's eyes widened as she stared right back at her sister, who was rapidly turning crimson under her questioning gaze.
"Did Waverly not tell you how we first met?" Wynonna shook her head, flicking her eyes back to her sheepish looking sister curiously. "Well, naturally I, being the new cop on the block and all that, decided to go introduce myself to the one and only Waverly Earp, who was apparently the only person worth knowing in this town. So I head over early so that the bar'll be empty- you're not the only one who likes to plan ahead Waves- and what do I see? Waverly on the losing side of a fight with a malfunctioning bar tap. And then I say," she tapped her chin looking deep in thought, "What did I say again? Sometimes I forget my own genius."
Waverly's answer was unintelligible even in the relative quiet of the bar, filled only with the last dregs of the patrons. Nicole was not going to let her get away with no answer as she leant forward and cupped her hand behind her ear, cheeks dimpling with her massive grin.
"I'm sorry, what was that?"
The petite bartender rolled her eyes and put on a monotone voice in an attempt to remove any humour from the situation.
"She said, I didn't know Shorty's had wet t-shirt competitions, okay?"
The older sister looked incredulously at Nicole and then at her sibling, "Her first words were 'I didn't know Shorty's had wet t-shirt competitions' and yet you still decided to date her?"
"It wasn't just that. I also remember the words, When I see something I like I don't wanna wait, in there somewhere too, I can't help it that she was smooth." Waverly grumbled back at her sister.
Wynonna let out a low whistle, turning back to her drinking buddy, "Wow, you were straight in there- or not straight in your case."
"Well it's true and plus, you need to do everything you can when you're up against such difficult competition as Champ the 'Boy-Man', pull out the big guns in a matter of speaking."
Waverly was not about to let herself go down as some weak willed, swoony lady without a fight, "To be fair it's hard to resist her when she's super confident and swaggery like that." She turned away muttering under her breath, only letting Wynonna hear the tail end of her rant.
"What was that Waverly?" She asked with a shit eating grin as if Wynonna did not know exactly what her sister had just said, "Something, something- police uniform?"
The similar grin graced Nicole's face as she spoke was insufferable, "Thanks Waves, but I already knew you liked the uniform," her voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper as she leant into Wynonna, "She isn't very subtle."
As the pair descended into gales of laughter at her expense, Waverly stormed off to serve literally any other patron of the bar- yes even the completely wasted guy in the corner- shouting over her shoulder at her annoying sister and smug girlfriend as she left:"You two are paying your own bar tabs tonight!"