Disclaimer: Alas, I do not own Sherlock. *raises fist of indignation* Moffat

Sebastian Moran meant everything to Jim Moriarty. He made it clear that he was a bad guy and that his main goal in life was to take down the great Sherlock Holmes but he really did love Sebastian. Sebastian was more than Moriarty could have ever hoped for. He didn't ask questions, did what he was told without thought to his own safety, and did whatever he thought Jim would want him to do. Sebastian, the smoking sniper, was more than just a pet to his master. Jim looked over at the man as he sat on the floor smoking. Jim was lying out across the sofa and was scrolling through channels.

"Jim?" Sebastian asked around his cigarette without looking away from the telly.

"Hmm?" He responded.

"You're staring at me." Moran said as he flicked his cigarette, causing some embers to fall into the little red ashtray sitting on the floor next to him.

"Find something good on." Jim said holding the remote out for the blond. He had never asked how Sebastian knew he was looking at him. Moran simply always seemed to know when it came to Jim.

"Yes sir." He said taking the remote and putting it automatically on the history channel, knowing the programs that were on. They were doing a thing about some great fire or something and Sebastian knew Jim loved fire.

"Sebby?" Jim asked after a while. Sebastian turned around as he took out his lighter and put out his cigarette in the ashtray Jim had gotten him for their one month anniversary. He knew these kinds of programs encouraged Jim's pyromaniac tendencies.

"Yes sir?"

"Have you ever tasted fire?" Jim asked.

"I can't say that I have sir." Sebastian said as he flicked open the lighter.

"I'm curious." Moriarty said as his vision flicked back to the telly.

"Of course sir." Sebastian said as he flicked the lighter into action and raised it to his mouth, eyes watching his mate carefully. Jim turned back to watch Moran. The sniper closed his mouth around the light and felt it go out. He knew he would have burn marks inside his now tender mouth but he didn't even wince. He would never show pain in front of Jim. He never wanted Jim to know that he was in pain; Jim would go into a fit of over protectiveness. Sebastian remembered when Jim asked him if he could do a hand stand in the first week of their relationship. Sebastian had preformed a handstand without a question or a second thought but when he was going back down he broke one of his fingers. He had hissed in pain and for the next two weeks Jim had never left his side. Jim took him straight to the hospital and insisted that no one look "his Sebby" in the eye. It was then that Sebastian learned how easily Jim got jealous. He took the lighter out of his mouth and put it back in his pocket. Jim looked at Sebastian, waiting for the verdict. "Smokey." Sebastian said, pleased with the grin that formed on Jim's face.

"Come cuddle." Jim said as he began tugging on his sniper. Moran sighed as he got up and sat down on the edge of the sofa and took out his box of cigarettes. He shook one out of the box and put it to his lips. "Is that more comfortable?" Jim asked as he slipped a hand under Sebastian's shirt and rested it on Sebastian's warm back.

"Yes sir." Moran lied. As he took out his lighter and lit his cigarette.

"What do you want me to make for dinner?" Jim asked. Sebastian sat in thoughtful silence for a moment.

"Why don't we go out for dinner?" Sebastian suggested. He felt Jim's hand on his back twitch and he knew he'd made a mistake. "I just feel like you always make dinner and I was thinking, you could have the night off." He explained in a deceptively calm voice.

"Where do you want to go?" Jim asked. Moran thought for a moment, did that mean he was off the hook? Or was it a trap?

"We could go to that little Italian joint down on the corner." Moran suggested.

"I do love Italian." Jim mused as his hand began slowly pushing Sebastian's shirt up. Moran felt relieved when Moriarty said that but that was quickly washed away. "On two conditions." Jim said as he let his cool hand slither across Moran's back. The sniper knew how much Jim both loved and loathed the scars on his back. They gave him something to trace when he was caressing him but they were also a reminder of a time when Moran had been in pain. Jim had once asked his lover to get them surgically removed and that was one of the few times Moran had denied him something. Jim had been angry and had made Sebastian write down a list of everyone he'd ever been with. Jim had proceeded to kill them all systematically. It was an interesting week to say the least.

"What conditions?" Moran asked.

"One, you take me to the shooting range. Two, you let me tie you up tonight." Jim said as he leaned in and licked Sebastian's side. He let the shirt fall back down as Sebastian let out an involuntary shiver. Jim loved going shooting with Moran and the sniped loved going with him too so that wouldn't be the problem. Jim liked bondage sex and Sebastian was fine with that but he hated being tied up. He hated being helpless to the whims of his master. He knew Jim would never intentionally hurt him or do anything Sebastian wouldn't like but Moran had never told his lover how much he hated being tied up. It always brought back memories of war. He had been held hostage, tortured, isolated, and worse. He had never told Jim about what happened to him in war. Jim had asked him about it once and Moran had gotten this far away look and said he didn't like to talk about it. Jim never brought it up again.

"Of course sir." Moran said. Too late. Jim had noticed the pause.

"Is there a problem?" Jim asked getting up and looking down at Moran skeptically.

"Of course not sir." Moran replied automatically.

"You paused. Are you unhappy? Do you have a problem?" Jim persisted. "What is it Sebby?" Jim asked grabbing Sebastian by his blond hair and pulling his head back. He leaned in and licked his neck and nipped at it. He sucked a big purple hickey onto him before releasing his tight hold.

"It's nothing sir." Sebastian said not wiping away the drool on his neck.

"Sebastian." Jim said as he pushed Moran back further into the couch. He sat down on his lap straddling him. "If there's something wrong, I want you to tell me. I want you to be happy and comfortable and if there is anything you don't like just tell me." Jim said looking deep into Moran's eyes.

"There is no problem sir." Sebastian said as he rested his arms around Jim's waist and puffed a cloud of smoke into his face.

"Sebastian." Jim growled. "Mister Moran. You are lying to me." He said waving away the smoke. "Your pupils dilate when you lie." He snarled. "Most people touch their nose, blink more, or something. Most people have a tell. You don't. You've learned how to delete your tell but there is one universal sign of lying. When someone lies their pupils dilate." Jim explained.

"Jim." Sebastian said as he took the cigarette out of his mouth. "I do everything you ask without question. Please, for once, don't question me." He said as he put it out on his arm. He watched as the ashes burned into his skin and watched as Jim's anger grew. He was expertly redirecting Jim's rage from his lies to his self inflicted injury.

"Why did you do that?" Jim asked furious.

"The ashtray is over there." Sebastian said calmly as he nodded towards the ashtray sitting on the floor. Jim blinked his anger so overwhelming he was unable to form coherent words. "Let's go." Sebastian said getting up and grabbing his coat. He pulled it on and left the flat. Jim just stood there shaking with rage for a moment longer. He had plans on how to get to the bottom of this. The only few things Moriarty needed he could list on one hand.

Sebastian's safetySebastian's comfortSebastian's loveSebastian's happinessThe destruction of Sherlock Holmes

Jim knew Sebastian had only hurt himself to redirect his attention. He knew Sebastian would keep a closed lid on it until Moriarty took drastic measures. Drastic measures was the name of the game and that's what would happen until Jim got the answers he desired. He went to the door and, upon opening it, found Sebastian lighting a cigarette.

"You know how far I'm willing to go Sebby." Jim said stepping out of their flat. "I want to know."

"You forgot your coat sir." Sebastian said as he took off his thick coat he had gotten while in the military. He draped it over Jim's shoulders and began walking towards the restaurant. Jim sighed under the heavy weight of the coat and pulled it tighter around himself. It smelled of Sebastian and he smiled as he scurried after his taller blond mate.

"I know sir. I do wish you wouldn't though." Sebastian responded crossing his arms.

"Why? What's so terrible? I want to know." Jim persisted.

"It's just not something I like talking about." Sebastian responded coolly as they arrived at the restaurant.

"A booth please." Jim said to the waitress with a flirtatious smile. Sebastian frowned, if this was how Jim was going to be drastic then he would win their little spat easily.

"Of course sir." She said as she led them to a booth.

"How about you get us some wine while you're at it beautiful." Jim said as he pinched her bottom and winker at her. She squeaked and scurried away. Sebastian just frowned. "Are you ready to tell me yet?" Jim asked as they sat down in their booth.

"Not in the least sir." Sebastian said as they opened their menus. "But you are setting that girl up for a bullet so you might want to be careful."

"That's why I love you Sebby." Jim said giggling. "Subtle jealousy."

"Here's your wine." Said the waitress as she came back with a bottle of wine and two glasses.

"Oh thank you." Jim said turning to her with a mischievous smile. "And why don't you give me your number while you're at it." Jim said as he produced a pen and smiled up at her.

"Very forward aren't you?" The girl said grinning and taking the pen. She wrote out her number on his arm before walking away.

"How about now?" Jim asked smiling at Sebastian and waving his arm. Show off, Sebastian thought.

"You do realize I was in war sir? I've been... Interrogated with much more severe consequences." He said as he continued to frown at his lover.

"I'm not trying to interrogate you." Jim said as a fiery rage glinted in his eyes. "I'm trying to make you happy. I'm trying to make you comfortable. I'm trying to make you safe. I'm trying to make you love me." He said as he smashed his fist down on the table. The people in the restaurant fell silent and all began staring at them. "I'd kill everyone in this room if I thought it would make you happy." Jim continued. "I'd cut my own arm off if it meant you would be comfortable. I'd kill everyone who'd ever hurt you if you told me who they are. I just want you to love me Sebby." Jim said angrily. Jim was like fire, wild, untamable, unpredictable, and burned you if you got too close. He was giving Sebastian a way to get close without being burned. He would put out his fire if it meant Sebastian would be happy.

"Waiter?" Sebastian looked over at one of the male waiters and waved him over. "I think we're ready to order." He said calmly. "I'd like spaghetti with meatballs and he'd like some lasagna." Sebastian said smoothly before turning back to Jim who was shaking with rage and gripping the table. Sebastian smiled, only he could get Jim this angry. "Is that right sir? Lasagna?"

"Why are you doing this Sebastian?" Jim asked through clenched teeth.

"Doing what sir?" He asked calmly.

"Sebastian." Jim snarled. Sebastian sighed. He had been able to withstand torture in war; he had been able to withstand anything. But now? Now he was breakable by one man's rage filled eyes alone. Sebastian sighed.

"I'll tell you everything when we get home." Sebastian said coolly. Jim's rage melted away in an instant. He had won. But if he did win, why didn't he feel happy? He looked at Sebastian, the man he wanted nothing more than to be happy and he looked so broken. He had broken his favorite play thing. His shinny new toy was now looking a bit dull. Jim smiled to himself; he supposed he would just have to shine it up. They ate dinner in silence, both lost in a void of their own thoughts. When they were done Sebastian paid and they walked home. As the door shut behind them Sebastian enveloped Jim in a hug from behind. The smaller man squirmed in the tight hold but was unable to break it. Sebastian lifted Jim easily off the floor and carried him to their bed. He dropped the smaller man unceremoniously on the bed. "What do you want to know first?" He asked as he leaned on the dresser across the room and lit a cigarette. Jim thought for a moment.

"How did you like my speech at the restaurant?" Jim asked with a smirk.

"It was eccentric." Sebastian said simply. He had decided no more lies. Nothing but blunt honesty, even with his crazy boyfriend. Jim frowned.

"Is that bad?" He asked.

"It's one of the reasons I love you. I love your eccentricities." Sebastian said as he took the cigarette from his lips between two fingers and exhaled slowly.

"Why did you pause?" He asked referring to their conversation before they left for food.

"One of your conditions made me..." He paused looking for the right word. "Trepidations."

"Which one? Why?" Jim asked quickly. Sebastian just sat there watching Jim with a cool calmness as he put the cigarette back between his lips.

"The bondage sex." Sebastian said. He paused to allow Jim to ask any questions. His face gave the implication that he wasn't going to ask anything, he was waiting for the 'because'. "When I was away at war I was sniper. I was the backup, the one that almost never got caught, the shadow of the real heroes. The other soldiers tend not to like snipers because we usually get away scratch free. They decided to play a trick on me, it went wrong and I was captured by the enemy. They kept me in a room with no windows, nothing just four concrete walls and a steel door. They wouldn't feed me regularly, they tried to interrogate me but I gave away nothing. It was about a year they had me. Tortured me, interrogated me, tied me up, beat me, neglected to feed me, and kept me in isolation. They tried everything to break me, and I do mean everything. I refused to break and they were going to kill me but my troop finally found me. I don't like being tied up because it reminds me of that." Sebastian said. His voice wavered near the end but other than that he remained his strong, unbreaking self.

"Was that when you left the military?" Jim asked.

"Yes." Sebastian responded. "I felt that if they would allow something like that to me then they were not a group I wanted to serve."

"What are their names?" Jim asked. Sebastian knew what he was thinking, naturally. The blond smiled sadly and shook his head.

"They're dead. All of them." Sebastian said. Jim looked surprised; Sebastian was not the kind of person to commit mass murder unless his master ordered him to. "I said they found me. I didn't say they rescued me. They got there with intentions of saving me. They gave me a gun and a bulletproof vest and all the ammo I needed. I killed all the enemy troops in the camp and then I kill all the troops that had come to rescue me. They were my troop, the people supposed to protect me. I was supposed to be their brother and they betrayed me. If there is one thing I hate, its betrayal. They all died that day. Everyone. The entire camp was red with blood and riddled with holes when I was done. I flew the chopped back to the camp and told them that there was a firefight and that I was the only survivor. The state I was in, they believed me."

"The state you were in?" Jim asked. Sebastian got that far away look that Jim hated.

"I was more dead than alive." Sebastian said. Jim finally understood his lover. He finally understood why he did things, why he acted the way he did. He finally understood everything.

"Sebby-" Jim said with a weak smile.

"Any more questions sir?" Sebastian asked, interrupting Jim.

"Why didn't you want to tell me?" Jim asked, noting the interruption and logging it for later comment.

"It was a moment of weakness that I do not enjoy dwelling on." Sebastian said deceptively calm.

"Sebby-" Jim said as he got up and walked over to the sniper.

"I know you don't approve of weakness sir." He said. Jim noted the second interruption. He slipped his hands into the two front pockets of Sebastian's jeans.

"Do you remember how we met?" Jim asked.

"Yes sir. I was hired to kill you." He said simply with a confused expression twisting his face. Jim nodded and began pulling Sebastian to the bed. The sniper simply allowed himself to be maneuvered. Jim smiled up at his sniper; he was such a willing subject, always prepared to serve his master, despite every psychotic whim.