Prologue

May turned on to her side and after a few minutes, she turned on to her back. She stared up at the ceiling, her eyes tracing the patterns in hoped that it would tire her eyes out, after what feels like hours she glanced over at her clock to see that only 10 minutes have gone by, It was her first day at the new job and so far, things were going well! She had just been introduced to Atlantis and found an office that had not only a great sea view, but she wasn't sharing it with anyone else. Everyone seemed to be nice, not that she had met many people. She got up and sat in front of the mirror not recognising the women staring back. Her eyes were dull and she had a sallow look, there were bags under her eyes. She stared at herself in the mirror, not really seeing, till the sun rose and she started to get dress.

Dr May Hemming had studied linguist anthropology and had a distinction that was very rare, she had been contacted by museums, by universities and the Government had been trying to get her to work for them her for over a year all be fore she had graduated. Having got her masters, she had decided that she wanted a family and at 28, she wanted to go on and get her PhD when her partner, Tim had finally proposed at her graduation, she loved him so they were to be married, and a family would be on the way after a year or two. She would pick up her studies after that, she was in no rush. Then the worst had happened, he had been killed. Happy and healthy one day and snuffed out the next, just gone! Then this other life had come crashing down on her; it had been too much for her. She had contacted the government about an over sea program they had told her about almost a year ago just in case it was still running. When her friend Dr Elizabeth Weir had turned up on her doorstep offering her a part of the Atlantis expedition, May had jumped without really looking. Suffice to say the next month was a whirlwind and a blur. She had been filled in on the Stargate program and she realised her prayers had been answered when she was told the Atlantis was in galaxy. another

She had spent most of the trip there in her quarters, learning basic ancient

So now that she was here, she was finally standing still, he had crept up on her. Her demons had followed her but this time there was literally nowhere to run.

Chapter 1

Atlantis was a big place and direction was not one of her strong points she had already asked two officers and didn't want to ask a third but as she come around the corner 'oomph' into something solid and warm and as she jumped back two arms reached out to grab her. she tried to hide the flinch that came with the contact but instead she lok down to coever the blush now spreading across her face. As she slowly raised her eyes and saw a tan shirt and then a leather necklace and dreads surrounding olive green eyes.

'I'm sorry I wasn't looking...I...erm I seem to be lost...sorry.

As she stepped aside to let the impressive male through she notice that, he wasn't wearing any uniform and though he looked military there was something more dangerous about him. As the male moved on she turn back to him intrigued and started to introduce herself, not wanting to be rude

I'm May Hemming. Pleased to meet you...' she offered her hand

'Ronan, Dex' the male said turning back. Not only did he take the offered hand but grabbed her wrist, May understood now that his man was a warrior and the grip was to check that she had no concealed weapon, she gripped him back and smiled. And as she smiled it clicked, this was the warrior that everyone had warned her about on the Daedalus. The man that put countless marines in the infirmary. So they said.

You're the sedatan they warned me about.

'And what do they say.' He asked staring at her, she was new but she was the first person out side of SGA1, 2 and Dr. weir who had tried to talk him.

she blushed and looked down,

That you were a runner, erm the wraith destroyed you home planet, she looked up, that you can take on an army of wraith and need four stunners before you go down.

He just looked into her eyes; people felt intimidated by him and tended to mumble around him. She wasn't scared of him at all. He looked at her again, she's been through hell he thought. Her eyes looked haunted and dull the smile didn't reach them at all; they held so much sorrow for one so young. Yet he could tell from her face, the sorrows were recent. He turned to leave, feeling he could add nothing further to the conversation.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend she called, her voice soft, as though she hadn't meant for him to hear. He turned around to talk to her but she had continued on her way. He watched her, her shoulders slumped, heavy she walked like she had no energy. She stopped at the end of the corridor and looked around, clearly lost

Are you lost? He called

'Erm...' turning back round. 'is there a transport near here? Second day here and the corridors all look the same.' she looked down as a faint blush spread over her cheeks giving colour to her pale face

He grunted and started to walk past May to a door that opened to reveal a transporter

'so close' she thought cringing but said 'Thank you, Goodbye'

Ronon waited 'till the transporter doors closed. He couldn't get her eyes out of his mind. He shook his head to clear them but found himself thinking about the haunted young women throughout the day

Elisabeth smiled as she spotted May enter the gate room and took a minute to study her friend, she hides her hurt well thought Elisabeth. However, she noted how her shoulders seem to have the weight of the world. Her body language told Dr. Weir that she was still not sleeping much. She felt concern for her friend, and wondered if bringing her to Atlantis so soon was the best thing for her. But May had jumped at the opportunity as though it were a life line. They had wanted her for a while.

'May' she called from the balcony and saw her friend look up with a fake smile and a wave.

'Glad you could make it' Elisabeth teased knowing her friend as they met on the stairs. 'How many did you ask?'

'Only two' May said giving that smile again. It was their customary greeting to see how many people she asked for direction.

As they walked into Lizzie's office, she replied.

Would have been more but I bumped into Ronan – literally

Ouch! Are you okay. I heard he makes people cry with just a look.

No he's not so bad but yes he showed me were the transporter was, he doesn't talk much does he.' She said quietly

'No but the fact that he didn't ignore you is a good sign' Liz said with a smile

From then on, it became all about work. Dr. Weir being one of a few who can read Ancient and she had specifically asked for May, having a linguist on base she was hoping to look through the Ancient data base more thoroughly. When Dr weir saw how much May became wrapped up in learning the new language, she knew May was in the right place for her to grieve and heal.

As May collapsed on her bed early next morning, exhausted but very happy she had successfully translated and spoke ancient, and even corrected Dr. Weir. A new language for her was like candy to a kid. Like her very own adrenaline rush. She fell asleep quickly and for the first time since he died she didn't dream.

At first, she worked from Elizabeth's office, but after two weeks and three teams coming through the gate with emergencies, that morning alone, she suggested May start to use her office.

Another four weeks went by without notice. She would work until she couldn't see and stumble to bed or sometimes she would just sleep in her office. She buried herself in work, desperate to ignore the clawing grief.