Deidara was 19. An S-rank missing nin from Iwogakure. His long, blond hair in his signature half pony tail. He opened his eyes; he was on the ground, propped up against a tree, and in a world that was covered in snow. He got up and groaned, as he did so he slipped once more on an ice patch hitting his head on the tree he had been propped up against located directly behind him and passing out once more. In the distance Tohru Honda had watched the stranger and rushed over to help the strange person up off the ground. She looked down and spoke to herself,
"Oh no, oh no, this poor, poor young woman has knocked herself out after having a nap!" Tohru looked into the stranger's blue 'eye' and decided she ought to help this person out and with that she forcibly dragged Deidara's body to her home, the home of Shigure.
Shigure was in his office but when Tohru came home he immediately came out, Yuki also coming out from his room upstairs.
"Tohru!" Shigure cried, "Who's your friend?" He bent over Deidara to get a better look at the outsider.
"I-I don't know," Tohru stammered, "I just found her-" Deidara opened his eyes and put his hand over Tohru's mouth,
"I AM NOT A 'HER'-un," he said through gritted teeth, clearly annoyed; every ounce of bitterness he could muster was put into the word 'her'. Shigure and Tohru had looks of utter shock on their faces, Shigure tilted his head,
"You're a 'he'?" Deidara was about to answer when there was a loud bang from above and Kyo came storming down the hallway stairs… He looked flustered, more flustered than usual. He was screaming, what else is new?
"WHAT IS HE DOING HERE?" Kyo cried, dragging Momiji down the stairs with him by the blond hair atop his head, "and who the hell is that?" He pointed his finger at Deidara and Deidara looked as though he was about to explode, which we all know is extremely likely. (: BT: Aww, crap, I ran out of food! I need more brain food! :)
"I AM DEIDARA-un!" Deidara began, staring down each of the Sohma individually, "HOW THE HELL COULD YOU NOT KNOW ME?" Everyone shrugged, "I AM AN S-RANK MISSING NIN TERRORIST BOMBER!" Momiji looked at Deidara innocently,
"what does 'missing nin' mean?" Deidara seemed to burst into flames at this comment, his anger burned with the white hot intensities of a thousand suns,
"YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A MISSING NIN IS-un?" Momiji nodded, "do you see this headband-un?" Momiji nodded once more, "do you see the line in the middle of the symbol?" Once again, Momiji nodded while looking at the Akatsuki member with utmost fear. "Well, the line means THAT I'M A MISSING NIN-un! GOT IT MEMORIZED?" Momiji nodded and felt tears well up in his eyes, Deidara disregarded him, having a partner like Tobi helped to make his heart cold and allow him to ignore the petty tears. Shigure eyed Deidara carefully and said to him in a very even voice,
"I thought that the headband was just a carefully picked accessory, you pull it off quite well." Kyo stepped forward and grabbed Deidara's headband, cautiously tying it around his own forehead, he liked the feeling of the headband on his forehead,
"I want one, get me one," Kyo ordered. Momiji had the innate ability to get over fear in a heartbeat like Tobi, to Deidara's great displeasure,
"Why does he look like a mädchen? *Insert Awkward Silence* Tohru tried to break the silence, "I absolutely love your dress! It looks so cute!" She commented, Deidara looked at her with much hatred,
"It. Is. A. Cloak. Not. A. Dress!" He replied, staring Tohru down. Tohru looked down in shame. The room fell silent once more time… Until Kagura came through Shigure's paper window screaming in inaudible tongues,
"KYO, MARRY ME! I LOVE YOU!" Kagura came flying, straight into the stranger Deidara who instantly tried to catch her. She was caught by surprise because she had also thought that Deidara was a girl, his eye widened but was blinded by a big poof of smoke and when the smoke had dissipated he looked down to see a brown boar sitting in his hands.
Deidara had disregarded the group and was contemplating ways that he could get home, he was ready to finally capture the Kyuubi and make the one called Sasuke suffer. He was intent on leaving as soon as possible but he always came across the same problem, he didn't know where he was and he didn't know how he was to get home. In the end he decided that he might as well stay in this weird place for a little longer while he figured out ways to get home. Momiji had stayed at Shigure's house and began to sing that special little song of his,
"Who's in the forest strolling? The birds and the bees sing Momiji! The frogs in the pond are calling Momiji, yes, it's true!" Deidara turned his head to look at the little fool, glaring intensely,
"You dare sing that song in the almighty presence of Deidara?" Momiji looked clueless, he hadn't realized that back home Tobi had sung a song almost identical to the one Momiji had sung. (Who's in the forest strolling? The birds and the bees sing Deidara! The frogs in the pond are calling Deidara, yes, it's true!) Kagura had finally transformed behind the two who bickered. (P.S. That would be Deidara and Momiji if you didn't figure it out yourself). Deidara seemed to turn around at just the right time and see that the little brown boar had been replaced by a naked girl with dark brown hair who had wrapped her arms around Kyo.
"I love you!" She chimed.
"WHY IS SHE NAKED?" Deidara looked disturbed, slightly shocked; not far away Momiji began to sing his song once more because he didn't get the message last time, he forgot that Deidara disapproved of his song, but once he said the word 'Who' Deidara glared at him and reached into his pouch of clay, working the clay into one of his sculptures. He threw many of these sculptures at Momiji who was still singing, and detonated them upon contact. Kyo looked to the others,
"I like him."
Look, I revised it! My writing style back from last summer was a load of crap! I've worked intently on fixing it, and this is the fruit of my labor! Yeah, I'm pretty proud. It's not 'college level amazing writing from the gods' but it's A-maze-ing for ME! Thanks to those who review and thanks for the advice on things hippielicious! I'm glad that you're around, otherwise I'd die.
~Burnt Taco