Disclaimer: I own nothing. All characters and stories belong to FOX, Kathy Reichs, and Hart Hanson.
A/N: Post The Bullet in the Brain. Booth reflects on the last minutes of the episode. Please review. Thanks. Love, Lawabidingchild.
Feelings of Regret
Alright, I'm starting to realize something very important. Bones is the most important thing in my life right now. I gave her a chance and she didn't take it. That's all beside the point, though. When she rejected me, I thought it was because she wasn't attracted to me. When she professed her love for me in the SUV a few months ago, I couldn't help but wonder if I really made a mistake.
I can see her now. She looks so happy with that conch shell she has attached to her ear. Her bright ice-water eyes light up as she listens to the shell's treasure. I watch her smile. Her beautiful, breathtaking smile that makes my heart beat just a little bit faster every time I see it. But Hannah...I can't just abandon her. What would that say to her about me?
What would Bones think of me if I did that?
Anyway, she loves Hannah like a sister and she probably wouldn't forgive me if I did that. That and she probably sincerely thinks I don't carry those feelings anymore.
But all the decisions that were made and all the hope that was given and taken away gave me a better perspective as Bones' partner. She already feels rejected enough.
The Gravedigger's murder just came through in perfect timing. It would have been a chance to comfort her about the whole thing. It would have been a chance to offer help to clear the skeletons out of her closet. It would have been a chance to tell her my true feelings.
But she seemed focused and on-the-ball with the entire investigation that she didn't need me by her side most of the time.
I'm starting to regret I got involved with Hannah.