Biting his bottom lip Dean winced as he climbed into his Impala, he felt as rush of sanctuary over come him as the engine began to roar into action. He sat motionless for a while his mind reeling over everything. His mum's death, his father's abuse, losing the only women he ever loved and Sam. Good old Sam Winchester, brother extraordinaire, royal pain in the ass, the only person who truly knew Dean and left him for dead at the hands of his father.
Dean clenched his jaw tightly as his hands stiffened on the steering wheel. His back ached from being thrown against a tree by the spirit of a Tribal Indian, his right eye was already beginning to swell and his left cheek stung from the bloody gash the spirit had left.
Dean's hand hovered over the gear lever unsure whether to go back to the motel or not. He already felt like he'd gone ten rounds with Mike Tyson and didn't particularly want another seven with Lennox Lewis tonight.
Ever since Sam left for college Dean's relationship with his father had changed, not that he'd admit it to anyone. In the last six months John had become more and more aggressive towards his eldest. Dean began to feel increasingly more guilty for Sam's leaving, allowing him too much free will, not pushing him enough in training and forcing him to do his schoolwork and make him proud. Dean's child like nature was mainly down to the twenty-four years he'd spent being the adult, caring, raising and moulding Sam into the perfect child that any parent would be proud of, caring, hard working and polite, but the Winchester's were no ordinary family, grades didn't matter, to John it was all about the hunt, about revenge. All Dean wanted was revenge too until Sam took off, leaving a gaping feeling in his chest, he'd lost his brother, his son and his best friend, he no longer felt the need for revenge. It didn't take him long to realise that he only wanted revenge for Sam's sake, for not knowing a mother.
As a child Sam was forever asking questions about Mary, Dean told him everything he could remember and had learned over the years. Dean stuck to one tradition at night time to make safe feel as safe as he did as a child. Dean would tuck Sam into bed and tell him Angels were watching over him, until Sam began to protest at thirteen that he no longer needed to be put to bed. Dean continued to say it every night until Sam left. Despite the fact believed less and less everyday that angels existed, he'd seen too much evil to believe there was a higher power out there. He lost his faith the moment his father put a gun in his hand at the age of six, all innocence was lost.
Dean ducked his head and stared up at the moon and the immortal words "May angels watch over you Sammy". Sighing again knocked the car into gear and slammed his foot on the gas and the car screeched onto the road, heading for the motel.
Sam gazed up at the moon deep in thought, the only sound was his girlfriend, Jess's rhythmic breathing as slept in the bed behind him. Sam's mind wandered over the past and his body filled with guilt as he remembered all the heartache of growing up. He was grateful for everything he had had, a brother who always looked after him, who brought him up as well as anyone, who always pushed him to be the best. Sam wondered if it was Dean trying to live his life through Sam but whether or that was the truth Sam was glad he had the chances he did and had Dean on his side to fight against Dad and school bullies. Dean was just as intelligent if not more so then Sam but he always played dumb through sheer laziness, it used to infuriate Sam that his brother acted the way he did but still would never change him for the world.
Stanford was a big deal for Sam, sure he had gone a few years later then most but he wanted the opportunity to do something with his life other then hunt and drink like Dad or Dean. The day he left for college was forever burned into his memory, the look on John's face and the anger in his voice, the pain behind Dean's eyes covered the usual cocky smirk playing on his lips. Dad's final words rang constantly in Sam's head "If you leave don't come back!" Sam blinked back the tears and tore his eyes away from the glistening moon onto Jess, he sighed heavily and shook his head to rid itself of bad memories in a desperate plea to look to the future. A bright future anyone would be proud to have, a beautiful wife, a first class law degree from the fourth best school in the country but, there was always a but, his brother wasn't there to share any of it with. He wasn't there to see it all, crack stupid jokes, get drunk and pass out at inappropriate times. Sam had no one he trusted enough to confide in about the little insecurities and the big ones.
Sam glanced back out of the window at the moon one last time and smiled with a song in his heart thinking of the immortal words that Dean muttered every night until he left "may angels watch over you too Dean" Sam mumbled before crawling back into bed and pulling the sheets up over himself and Jess, protectively wrapping an arm around and hoping the nightmare wouldn't come tonight.