The Story Behind Her
Eyes
She's dying.
Cold, bluish skin, shaking and
shivering, sweating, yet when I touched her forehead and her neck, I could feel
that she was burning up, inside. She's not
even conscious now, which may be a blessing, because when she is, she speaks of
a great pain in her chest, and she breathes rapidly, as if drowning.
Drowning.
She is. She told me about liquid in her lungs. Choking her slowly to death. Water had condensed in it, and the matter-of-fact way in which she had
described this just made me feel, all of a sudden, incredibly furious.
With her, somewhat. She did it on purpose. She does nearly everything on purpose. Probably thought that making me get angry
with her would be better than being angry with myself. And I am...angry with her.
I suspected she had been hiding
something for a while. She'd been
talking up to Sanctuary more often, avoiding me, Rai'gy looking a little more
harassed than usual, then one day in my presence she coughed, a hacking,
wrenching sound. Coughed up blood, a
small, bright red spray of it.
That tends to get my attention.
She tried to wave this away, play
down the incident. Said I shouldn't
worry, she'd take care of it herself. I
didn't think she was doing that very
well, so I refused. Demanded to know
how long this had been going on. She
refused to tell me. Ended up quarreling
with each other. We do that
sometimes. Then she clutched at the side
of her head with one hand, in the middle of a sentence, and collapsed.
That did it.
Should have been the end of it,
except that nothing seemed to be helping her. Not even Rai'gy could cure her, and he even bit down his pride to allow
healers of other gods to try. Thought
that maybe Lloth had something against Winter.
Nothing
worked. She got worse, until she
couldn't even get out of bed without nearly blacking out. Everything she did began to tire her. And the coughs. And the pain. Took me a long
time to pry the latter out of her. She
didn't want to tell me, could you believe that?
She told me one day, frankly, that
Irr'liancrea was going to let her sleep. Either she got better and woke up, or she'd die without the pain.
What could I say?
Oh, I tried. But she wouldn't listen. As usual. So now she's sleeping. Worsening
visibly. And I realized that I was
afraid, afraid for her. Holding her in
my arms, trying to ignore the shivering and the cold, and the harsh breathing. The wolf known as Kel lay mournfully on her
feet, ignoring me. It doesn't like me
much.
Quite obvious that it blames me for
this. And I can't contradict it,
because yes, this was my fault, indirectly.
Her sword glowing next to it. It's been quiet ever since it made Winter
sleep. Damned thing, I wish I'd never
heard of it and its power. Then I would
not have asked Winter for help, so long ago...
Not even Crenshinibon could help.
I knew Winter was going to die.
That was why I called everyone else
out of the room. Rai'gy didn't look
very happy about it, but he left. He
loved her, even if he wouldn't admit it.
The wolf looked up suddenly, and
growled, and scrambled to its feet.
I glanced at it, then up. And blinked. Seated demurely on the table close to the bed in the sickroom was
a girl. A slender, pretty human girl,
wearing black leather trousers, and a black skimpy vest-like garment, cut low
and held up by two thin straps. Black
hair and deep black eyes, piercing but kind. Under her right eye, in the light of the room, was a tattoo, a black
spiral.
She held a strange device with black
folds and an onyx hooked handle [umbrella] in black gloved hands, and black
boots with silver buckles dangled over the floor. She had a necklace with the pendant of an ankh, starkly
simple. Her skin was white, incredibly
pale.
And she smiled when she saw my eyes
on her.
"Who are you?" I demanded. "How did you get in?" A flick of the wrist,
and I'm holding my throwing knives.
"You wouldn't believe it if I told
you." She said in a pleasant voice, in perfect drow.
The wolf Kel whimpered slightly, and
then growled again, as if trying to be brave.
"Try me." I said coldly.
She shrugged. "No can do. But it's strange that you can see me." She frowned a little, and stared
at me so intensely that I finally looked away. Diatryma feathers bobbed to the side as I turned my head.
"Are you a mage, then?" I
asked. I'm too heartsick to kill her
now, but that does not mean I would not if I had to. For now, I'd humor this strange rivvil. For now.
"No." She folded her arms, then
pulled up her legs to sit cross-legged on the table. "I'm Death."
For a moment that passed right over
my head. The next question, 'why are
you here' was just about on my lips.
Then I realized.
And I stared at her, and tried to
smile sardonically. Not really
succeeding, since Kel let out a whimper at her words, and if Kel thinks she is
who she is...
"You're
Death?" I sneered. "A rivvil?"
"I'm Death," She repeated, and
smiled. "Yes, currently I like this
form, thank you very much. Didn't your
mom tell you that if you don't have something nice to say you don't say it?"
"No," I said dryly, warily. For her to have entered Bregan D'aerthe
unseen and unnoticed, she would have to have magic more potent than any mage in
this city.
Unless she really was...
No, I couldn't believe that.
Death's when you watch someone
bleeding from a mortal wound, the light slowly goes out of their eyes, and they
change in a few moments from something living into something dead. When you see those poor tortured remnants of
drow in torture chambers, whose very eyes beg you to kill them cleanly. When you see someone wasting away and you
can't do anything to help...
But a girl?
A human girl?
No.
I won't believe it.
Must have said that last out loud,
because she turned to regard me. "You
won't?"
I shook my head, vehemently. The plumes in my hat twirled away at the
edges of my vision.
Winter let out a sobbing breath, and
I glanced down quickly, but she's still asleep. I shifted her into a more comfortable position, rubbing her arm
absently in a subconscious effort to try and stop the shivering, then looked up
again.
"Fine." The girl shrugged. "I don't care."
I blinked.
"Not my job to make you believe me
or not," she grinned. "You'd believe
me, sooner or later. When I come for
you."
Was she threatening me?
Something of my expression must have
been very obvious, because she chuckled, a soothing sound, an infectious
laugh. "Oh, I come for everyone sooner
or later. You're not the one I'm here
for now, even if you can see me."
Maybe...
And I knew.
Deep down.
She's Death.
And if she's here...
"You are here for Winter?" It took a
lot of effort to say that. And I
couldn't keep out the desperate hope clinging on to the edges of my flat tone.
"You know the answer, Jarlaxle."
Death said, and balanced the umbrella on her shoulder.
I wasn't surprised that she knew my
name. Still, I tried to deny it. "She's not dead yet."
"She will be." Death replied
noncommittally.
"Are you always here early, then?" I
replied coldly. "To watch them die?"
"Why should I do that? It's
depressing," Death said, and crossed her legs.
"Then why?" I demanded.
Death shrugged. "Can't remember." She said, blithely.
I wondered if...and I held my
throwing knives more tightly. Kel
noticed, and braced itself to help if I tried.
"Killing me won't help. I can't die. Sorry." Death said, a little sympathetically. "You can try if it'd make you feel
better." And despite myself, despite
whom she was, I found myself liking her, grudgingly. She's someone I would like to meet at the end, a last friend
before I go. So I sheathed the knives.
And that was, I suspected, why she
was like this.
Winter moaned in her sleep, and my
attention was distracted for a moment as I whispered to her, disjointed
soothing phrases, as if speaking to a sleeping child. If they didn't help her, at least they comforted me.
When I next glanced up the girl was
still there. She was looking at the
ground, but she met my eyes once I began to stare. "Want to talk about it?" she said comfortingly.
"And that helps?" That came out more
bitter than I had intended.
The girl shrugged, and grinned
lopsidedly, moving her hand palm down from side to side in a strangely
endearing gesture. "Some people,
yes. Think you're one of them?"
I thought about this. Did I really want to open my heart to a
stranger? By nature I am not that sort of extrovert who'd tell anyone and
everyone what he feels at any moment. I
like to keep to myself.
But yes, I did need someone to talk
to. Before Winter, I mostly kept to
myself. Then I opened up to her,
grudgingly at first, only when she teased and cajoled and threatened, prying
open my heart. Then later it came so
naturally that now...
So I twisted my lip into a semblance
of a smile. "Yes I am."
Kel settled back in the bed,
ignoring the both of us.
"Well, I'm listening," Her voice was
not demanding at all, which would have made me shut up, but quiet and
calming. Seemed to tell me to take my
time if I wanted.
And faced with that sort of
attitude, I didn't know how to start. It seemed like too much I wanted to say, so much that I could not even
put some of it into words. I glanced helplessly
at her.
She grinned. "You rather I ask questions then?"
I shrugged. Nice, neutral expression. That would help, but I didn't like it. Don't like answering questions.
"'Kay. Now." She thought a little, and I wondered how I thought she was
speaking the drow tongue, even if some of her words technically did not exist
in the language. "Would you like to
tell me why you think it's your fault?"
I blinked.
How did she...
But I was speaking before I was
consciously aware of it. "It was
Winter's fault."
Kel growled. So it wasn't ignoring us after all.
"You sure?" she smiled, and it
wasn't a supercilious smirk.
I felt myself slipping into the mode
I used when speaking to Matrons – cryptic – but managed to pull out of it. "If she had not used that accursed power of
hers this would not have happened to her. She thought that she would be stronger the second time she used it, but
the first time weakened her, and the second time worsened her..."
Kel growled again.
"Kel thinks that she had to use the power
of hers to save your skin," Death said mildly.
"There must have been alternatives,"
I said reflexively. "And she made that
mistake of thinking she could handle it. She always thinks she knows what she is doing." That last said with a
touch of resignation.
"No one really does." Death
agreed. I kept thinking of her as a
human girl.
"But yes, in a way if I had not
sauntered into House Baenre so full of confidence that I could talk my way out
of everything, she would not have needed to use that power." I admitted,
painfully. Kel sniffed.
"Did you tell her about this?" Death
said gently. She knew the answer. I suspected this was more for Kel's benefit.
"Yes," I said. I remembered what she said very clearly,
after all. "I did, when she was worsening."
"And?" Death prompted.
"She told me that I was a greater
fool that she had given me credit for," As I said it, I began to smile,
unwillingly at first, but a genuine smile for times past. "Then she waited for me to stop sputtering
at her before continuing to say that although I was stupid to get captured by
Baenre in the first place, her methods to extricate me were hers. And that since the choice was hers, the
consequences she would also shoulder."
"She said that by believing it was
my fault I was insulting her ability to make decisions, and that if I continued
to moan about it in front of her she would throw me out of the room." I
chuckled.
Winter was very beautiful when she was angry. Which was one of the ways in which I could disarm her when she
was in a tirade – smile at her suddenly and tell her she was lovely. Always works. She'd glare and call me a flatterer, but she liked compliments. As I had said before, Winter was vain, even
if she would not admit it.
"There you go, then." Death rocked
back on the table. "But yes, it was
your fault."
I stared at her.
"Even if it was indirectly," Death
continued. "So if you'd accept that,
you'd feel a little better."
So I did.
But I didn't feel better.
"Oh, you will in time," Death said
confidently. "You know what you would
do when she goes, better'n me."
And I did. I would grieve for some time, but elves have a lot of time. A year or two is nothing to us. But I would not grieve forever. Sooner or later my nature would lead me back
pragmatically to more or less my normal state of mind. I'd continue as before, if without Winter,
masterminding all the activities of Bregan D'aerthe.
My personality is not built for
lingering on the past. I harbor
regrets, like any other, but I have never continued to think about them except
to learn from the experience that they have brought me.
Yes, I would grieve. And I would not forget her. But I would not destroy myself because of
it. Elves are practical, especially
those of my age. We see time as
something that would stretch for much longer than even our lifetimes, and we
know that all things would pass on, sooner or later.
But it took a lot of heartache to
admit this to myself.
"Yes I know," I said, and sighed.
"Well, you're not one of those who'd
belong to my sister just because I came for a close one, that I know," Death
shifted on the table, comfortably.
"Your sister?" I asked
curiously. When my main thought now
was, how long more.
"Despair," Death said. "Sooner or later people visit her realm."
"I did it very early, then," I said,
half-jokingly.
"Yes," Death nodded. "You don't belong to her. But you are partly in her realm now."
"Visiting," I said, a rancid taste
in my mouth. "Visiting."
Death smiled. "Everyone belongs to me in the end, if you
rather."
"No," I shook my head. Depressing.
"Please yourself," Death
shrugged. "'Tis true."
"Sounds fair," I commented.
"You know, you're the first to say
that to me," Death looked mildly surprised.
I shrugged.
"But it's neither fair nor unfair,
it just is," Death corrected.
"What are your siblings?" I asked,
more out of making small talk than anything else.
"Oh, Destruction, Dream, Despair,
Delirium, Destiny and Desire." Death recited. "Desire's the only one whose realm people visit in passing."
"Let me guess," I said dryly, "Most
of those who enter her realm next visit Despair's?"
"You know a lot about people," Death
said, placidly. "Well yes. If not Despair's, then mine."
"And what is your realm like? Heaven
and Hell?" I asked, morbidly curious.
"No," Death shook her head. "It is peace. But you'd find out. In
the end."
"I was led to believe that there
were planes where spirits went depending on how 'good' they were," I pointed
out.
Death smiled. "There are."
"And then your realm?"
"There's also my realm."
I frowned. "I do not understand."
"You will. Eventually." Death said easily. "But it'd help if you try not to think about it."
Winter moaned again, and I stroked
her hair helplessly.
"How long more?" I asked quietly,
dreading the answer.
"Won't help if you know." Death
replied.
"Maybe it would." I retorted.
"It wouldn't." Death said
calmly. "And you know it."
I did.
But it still made me furious that
she would not tell me.
"And you know how long more I have
as well?" I continued.
"Yes I do." Death nodded. "But I'm not telling."
I expected as much.
"Can I make a deal?" I asked
carefully, touching Winter's cheek. It
was very cold.
"No deals, Jarlaxle," Death said.
"But she would live if you let her?"
I inquired slowly.
"She's in a lot of pain," Death
pointed out. "I offer peace."
"She would live if you let her,
yes?" I stubbornly continued.
"Why does everyone ask that
question?" Death sighed. "It won't do
you any good to know."
"Would she?" I asked again. "If you wanted to?"
"Yes, I could let her live if I
wanted to," Death said, unwillingly.
"Then..."
"No." Death said firmly. "If her time has come, then it will have
come. Sooner or later she will
die. As will you. So why do you ask this of me?"
"As commander of Bregan D'aerthe," I
said slowly, "I would think that I do not wish her death because her mind has
been a large asset to our plans and schemes as well as to our structure since
she joined...again," I corrected. The
first time she had joined Bregan D'aerthe was as Velve, a male drow. Disguised very well.
She hadn't exactly joined
again. Just told me that she would be
'observing' and that she would 'comment' once in a while. I let her think that.
Death made a noise like 'go on'.
"She told me that Bregan D'aerthe
was making the same mistake as Menzoberranzan, if from another angle. We prefer male members, so females that
would truly like to join are either grudgingly let in and watched, or are
discouraged. Menzoberranzan is
prejudiced against males, Bregan D'aerthe was becoming prejudiced against
females," It seemed so easy to talk to her. As it had been to speak with Winter.
"She had been working on that," I
continued. The proportion of females in
Bregan D'aerthe had increased significantly, even if males were still the great
majority. Proved to be a great
investment.
"I treated her as an
equal...eventually," I added. I was not
used to that. "She made a splendid
critic of my ideas. Two minds are
better than one. Bregan D'aerthe has
improved more quickly than when I was the only one who orchestrated
everything. She does half of the
paperwork now, all of those which do not require my signature. Or used to do. Would not have been surprised if eventually the head of Bregan
D'aerthe would not solely be myself."
And as I said that, the import of my
words came down on me, and I felt worse. There would not be an 'eventually'.
Death asked gently, "But
personally?"
"Personally I was prepared to treat
her as an opponent, at first," I shrugged. "She had Irr'liancrea. I had
Crenshinibon. The two still would not
work together."
"I admit," I said, eyeing Kel, who
seemed to be listening with fascination, "That the first emotion I felt for her
was lust. She is very beautiful...more
so than any female elf I had seen so far. And I do not speak solely of looks, but also for her mind." There was
still that lust now, whenever I looked at her, felt her touch.
"That's not unusual," said Death, easily.
"I believed at first that a close
association with her would be dangerous," I said bluntly, deciding, for some
reason, to speak the words in my heart, "I did not really understand her, and
she did not hail from this world, any longer. I did know that I wanted her. And to prevent that from turning into an infatuation I decided that I
would have to have my way with her. I
tried to seduce her."
What an ugly word for something we
both enjoyed.
Kel growled, but the menacing sound
petered off.
Death did not accuse or judge,
merely listened, so I continued.
"It did not work that way," I
admitted. "She responded, yes, but then
she disappeared from Menzoberranzan. I
was very angry at first, furious that she could have escaped so quickly,
severing herself from my plans. Even
Rai'gy did not know where she had gone to. But when I calmed down I knew that attempting to concentrate Bregan
D'aerthe's resources on finding her would simply be a waste. At that time there was an angel known as
Reima who was after Crenshinibon, and I had to concentrate on it."
"Admittedly when Baenre called for
an audience so quickly after she had left I was suspicious. With one crystal gone, they may have thought
me...weaker. One ally was blatantly
gone, after all." I touched a finger to Winter's bluish lips. "Nearly broke me. Then Triel accused me one day of freezing up the city, and
ordered me to stop it."
"I didn't know what she was talking
about, and she must have believed me, because she dragged me up to one of the balconies. And it was snowing. Outside. And inside, it was still incredibly cold."
"A lot of drow died," Death said.
"I would think so," I nodded. "Triel wanted to know what was
happening. Said that there was some sort
of monster in the courtyard who demanded that Baenre give me up to it so that
it could 'take its vengeance' or something. So I said I could not see any monster. Mostly that I wanted a better look."
Death nodded.
"It growled and snarled when it saw
me, and demanded again that Baenre throw me out. I knew that if I tried to encourage Baenre, Triel would not let
me go. But if I acted afraid...well,
she might."
"Reverse psychology," Death
murmured.
I shrugged. "An old trick. But I had to be sure if this monster was real, a trick, or a ploy
to rescue me. So I gambled. Only later did I realize how much it had
cost her to play this 'trick' on Baenre. It took her a long time to recover enough to walk without help, then she
insisted on visiting Sanctuary. Was
going to take the twins along, because she said that Drizzt visited during
holidays, and the twins wanted to meet him."
I chuckled at that. Wonder how he did. Drizzt didn't seem like the type.
"After that. So I did sleep with her. But again it did not work like what I
thought it would. I did not 'get over'
her...in fact, I wanted her more than ever. And she did know what I was trying to do. It amused her, I remember," It had annoyed me when I realized
that she knew, for a while.
"And very painfully, she made me
want her for her mind as well. To value
her opinion, and to confide in her...that took her a long time. I do not change very easily." I smiled, self-deprecatingly. Not used to not speaking in riddles.
"It was not perfect, and it still is
not. We do argue. At least twice a week if we happen to be
together for the week." I smiled despite myself. "About whether a venture into Undraeth is currently
profitable. Whether it is advisable to
admit females into a higher rank in Bregan D'aerthe, to give them more
freedom. Whether Bregan D'aerthe should
consolidate its position in the Underdark before trying the Surface. Once even...to use her words, 'why the hell
do you wear a purple hat with feathers?'"
Death grinned. "Really? It's nice. Very striking."
"Thank you," I returned her
grin. "I like it. She didn't, and told me in not so many
terms. First one to dare to do so. She dared many things." And I looked down, and I continued, "Not
long more now, yes?" And I felt better about saying that. Even if I still did not want to let her
go. Too used to having my way.
"Won't do you any good to know,"
Death said patiently.
"I thought you would say that," I
sighed. "And I would think that another
question you would like to ask is 'Do you love her?'" Of course, the drow tongue being as limited as it is, I had to
use the svirfneblin word for it.
"Well, that was certainly in my
mind," Death admitted cheerily, "But if you don't want to tell me it's cool."
"Nearly everyone asks me that
question," I mused, "Though not in words."
"So...you want to tell me?" Death
inquired.
"Would you like to know?" I smiled.
"Well, yes," Death affirmed.
"Why? I would not think it matters,"
I said carefully.
"Because...once in a century I take
mortal form for a day so as to better understand the lives I lead on," Death
smiled, and her eyes were nostalgic and far away. "And each time I find the wealth of what every living thing has
but usually takes for granted...intoxicating. I fall in love with it every time. The emotions, the tastes, the textures...and so each time I have to
return I regret. So very much. But so I like to see such emotions...because
they remind me of what I leave behind each time I return."
I thought about this, and I said,
"Have you ever danced beneath a night sky dotted with stars in the moonlight?"
Death did not look like she was
expecting this question, but she shook her head.
"You should try it," I smiled, and
it was my turn to remember the past. "Almost like magic."
"With Winter then?" Death knew, of
course.
I nodded. "Her idea. I had
forgotten how exquisite the surface could be." Later, of course, had been
something to remember as well.
So, did I love her?
"She made me see everything in a
different light," I said neutrally, as if reading off a page. "Power is only a game to her. It was everything to me...nearly
everything. She told me that even if I
somehow managed to rule the Underdark, it doesn't really matter. Because even for elves, life is too
short. History is rewritten. Sooner or later I would be forgotten, as
well, and she thought that the main point of living is to truly enjoy
yourself."
"And it is," Death said.
"She said that all the power in the
world is useless in the end when you die and you have no one to truly mourn and
remember," I recalled.
"Do you agree?" Death asked.
"No," I replied, and grinned. "Precisely that life is short, hence I try
to achieve as much as possible. Even if
I did acknowledge that yes, it had turned into a rather dangerous
obsession. She does everything by her
own rules, whether I liked it or not. Inflexible." I sighed, true regret. "I wish she trusted me enough to tell me what was happening to her."
"Did you ever consider that she just
did not want you to worry?" Death asked obliquely. "The outcome would have been the same."
"How do you..." I flared, then
subsided. "Then again, maybe you do
know."
"I've seen it happen many times,"
Death agreed. "So, do you?"
"Define the word," I replied. Riddles.
Death smiled. "Okay. It's a strong feeling of affection for something...maybe very attracted
to them. It's when you feel good inside
when you think of the something, not disturbed or angry. When you...think of the person very
often? When it hurts to see the person
unhappy. Delirium would talk about
sunflowers and butterflies, which is also another way of looking at it."
"What of sacrifice and 'doing
anything for the person'?" I asked. But
I knew the answer.
"Would you?" Death grinned.
"No," I admitted.
"There's no real way of defining
love. In some ways I think life runs by
its terms. You can love, for example,
eating chocolate, but doesn't mean you'd sacrifice yourself for it." Death said
whimsically. "So do you want to tell
me?"
"You know the answer," I said, and
smiled, throwing her words back at her. It's a habit that annoys Winter.
Death nodded, but didn't acknowledge
it. She changed the subject. "Winter loves you, did you know?"
I did. But it still felt...strangely good to listen to someone else tell
me this. Strange, very strange.
As to Kel...it didn't move. Already knew this, probably. Winter confides in it more than she does
with me, which still makes me a little jealous. So she must have told it already...and irrationally, I'm annoyed
at her for not telling me instead.
How would Death know?
Then again, I didn't want to ask.
Death suddenly turned her head
towards the blank wall next to her. "Hello," she brightened up.
A shifting in the texture of the
air, and a tall human appeared, all in white. I'd seen him before. Not human,
no.
He bowed a courtly bow to Death,
then kissed her hand. She smiled.
Then he turned to glance at me, and
I realized belatedly that in his hands he held some sort of bundle of brown
cloth.
"You would take her?" he asked
Death.
"You know the answer, Morikan."
Death replied. "I come for
everyone. Eventually, even you."
I blinked at this. Always thought They were forever.
Morikan nodded. "I know. However, I'd like to interfere a little this time..."
My heart leaped.
Death sighed, but she didn't look
upset. "Again?"
"The possible successors for the
shards are not as yet in place," Morikan said irritably, "Winter was not
supposed to...but this would do no good to tell you."
"When would they be in place?" Death
asked mildly.
Morikan shrugged. "The best ones aren't even born yet."
"You'd live," Death got off the
table. I tensed as she approached.
"Thanks," Morikan was saying.
"No problems," Death grinned. "Was nice talking to Jarlaxle."
I frowned. Morikan had wanted Death to speak with me?
But because of that, I had admitted
and accepted much to myself. Was that
why? But would he not already have known? Winter gave me the impression that
they were all-powerful...
"Have you asked her if she wanted to?"
"I was about to." Morikan said
casually, and there was no surge of power or light, but Winter stirred. Her shivering stilled, and her breath
evened, then she opened those ice blue eyes of hers and smiled up at me,
fleetingly, before shifting to face Death and Morikan.
"I'd never recover, would I?" she
said, and her voice was strong, something it had not been for very long. I wondered how she knew.
"No," Morikan said. "Even with the best healing you would still
have the occasional cough...sometimes the pain, the headaches...so I'd let you
choose. I'm democratic," he said, with
the ghost of a smile.
"Winter," I whispered, afraid.
"Hush," she replied absently, then
looked at Death.
The girl reached out. "Take my hand, Winter."
Winter chuckled. "Jarlaxle, let go, will you? This is my
choice."
It took me a bit to realize that I
was holding her tightly. Rather
sheepishly, I loosened my grip.
"Right," Winter said, "I don't see
any point in dying, yet. Still a lot I
want to do, even if I'd have to be in pain while I do it. I'm sure a lot of people welcome you, but
now I don't, and you know it."
Death nodded. "Only met three other people who had the
same views."
"And?" Morikan chuckled.
"They're still alive," Death
admitted.
"So?" Morikan prompted.
Death sighed. "Bad
dragon. You owe me." Then she turned
back to Winter. "You do know that I
will come for you again?"
"Yes," Winter smiled. "Maybe next time, then."
Death nodded. Morikan smiled, satisfied, and then handed
her the brown bundle.
Death uncovered it. A small baby dragon, thin and weak, scales
of silver blue not yet hardened, breathed its last. Then a dim gold light flickered from within it, and the dragon
opened its eyes and squeaked.
It was now translucent.
"A replacement," Morikan
explained. "I would have saved this
one."
Death nodded as if satisfied. "Well, looks like I'm not needed here any
more, then," she said, and waved cheerily. "See you."
That didn't sound very nice.
She disappeared. Morikan looked down at Winter, then frowned
slightly.
A portal opened, and two humans,
along with a centaur filly wearing the barest of clothing stepped out. I recognized the filly, at least, from the
school that taught healing in Sanctuary.
The room suddenly seemed rather
crowded.
The filly glared at Morikan and said
something irritably. Morikan bowed to
her, winked at me, and then admitted, "They wanted to come 'with or without' my
permission. Winter has too many
friends."
He waved, then dissipated into silvery dust that twirled around as if
lifted by wind, then melted away into the wall.
Winter was unconscious again, her
symptoms returning. The humans and the
centaur filly shooed me off the bed, then set to chanting over her. Kel watched happily, then let out a snort of
indignation when the filly also picked it up – what strength – and dumped it off the bed.
Many friends.
Yes, she was that sort of person.
I began to smile.
I knew that Death would have taken
Winter anyway, but this time, she did not want to. Not out of favor for Morikan. Or some whim.
Why?
Because of the compassion, kindness,
understanding in her eyes, the wisdom in those black orbs, the great heart
behind it that allowed her to 'do her job', be the sort of person you would
like to meet in the end. Was that the
story behind her eyes? Duty?
Or perhaps...
Love.
And...
Fading away, into the distance, I
could hear the sound of beating wings.
--
Afterword
"There." The author said with
satisfaction.
"Shorter than the first one,"
Jarlaxle observed, leaning over her shoulder.
"Would you rather I pulled it the
six pages longer?" The author retorted, fingers resting threateningly on the
keyboard.
Jarlaxle shuddered. "Gods forbid."
"Why are you here anyway? I was
expecting Zak." The author said mildly. "And I wish you people would
take off your boots downstairs or something. I mean, mom's asking how come I have shoeprints of different sizes on the
floor..."
"And what did you tell her?"
Jarlaxle grinned, straightening and folding his arms.
"I changed the subject," The author
replied, then stuck out her tongue when Jarlaxle chuckled. "You haven't answered my question."
Jarlaxle leaned against the
bookshelf. "Zaknafein said he wanted a
break. Somehow he got hold of his other
self and then asked him for help. This
other self, being a certain sword master, happened to ask Winter for help."
"Uh. Thoughtful of him." The author said sarcastically. "Winter I can work with. So why are you here instead?"
"Can't work with me?" Jarlaxle
feigned hurt.
"Next time those jewelry clash on
each other I'm duct-taping them to you," the author said snippily. "Stop dodging questions."
"Very well," Jarlaxle held up his
hands in mock surrender. Not a single
bracelet or bangle clinked. "She did
want to come. Told me she was going
'offworld' for 'a while', and not to 'worry'. I ask you. She only just managed
to walk by herself yesterday."
"You didn't let her, then?" the
author grinned, as if at some secret joke.
"I told her no. She told me to stop behaving like a 'mother
hen', and said that she could 'take care of herself'," Jarlaxle said dryly, "We
were beginning to get into the better part of screaming at each other when she
started to cough. No blood, but it
sounded bad, so I ordered her to go and rest."
"Don't think she liked that," the
author said mildly, her mouth twitching at some barely hidden mirth.
"She didn't," Jarlaxle smirked. "Called me all sorts of names, told me to vith'ir, then began to cough again. So I told her I'd come instead. At least that satisfied her."
The author snickered then. "Jarlaxle, did you happen to wonder if she
wanted to come in the first place?"
"Of course she did..."
"What I meant was, did you consider
the possibility that she may have been manipulating you to come instead?" the
author pointed out innocently. "Seems
to me like she knew all the buttons
to press."
Jarlaxle frowned, and rubbed his
nose with his hand, then blinked and let out a low exclamation. "Why, that..."
"Exactly," The author beamed. "Thank you very much for coming, by the
way. You've got better manners than
Zak."
"Even Kel would have better
manners," Jarlaxle retorted, still looking rather mortified. "Damn. Forgot she could act so well."
"You underestimate her," the author
shrugged. "Right. Now you have to ask me questions."
"How do I leave?"
"No, about the story. You leave when I let you," the author
smirked.
"All right," Jarlaxle sighed, then
said slowly, as if reciting words from a script. "This disease...what is it?"
"Pneumonia, or an approximation of
it," the author said happily, now that Jarlaxle was co-operating. "My brother got it once, a long time ago."
She paused, then added in a softer voice. "I remember folding those little 3D paper stars...a hundred of them,
because a hundred of them give you a wish. I wished that he'd get well."
"Bloody nice of you," Jarlaxle said
sardonically, "If your brother is that human boy outside."
"Yes, he is," the author said
dryly. "Things change I suppose."
Her brother bangs on the door. "Hey! Are you using the 'phone? I can hear
you talking to someone! I want to use the 'phone!"
The author winced. "I don't have the 'phone," she replied,
sounding annoyed.
A few more loud bangs on the door,
shaking the hinges, then stamping away.
Jarlaxle sniggered, then
brightened. "Can I go now? I want to
express something to Winter about..."
"No other questions?" The author
pouted.
"Can I go now?"
"I meant about the story," she said
irritably.
"Can I say no?" Jarlaxle said
hopefully.
"You ask something or you stay
here," the author snapped, folding her arms. "Why does it take so much effort to make you people work with me?"
"Damn." Jarlaxle muttered. "Right. What's this about beating wings at the end of the story?"
"Something that happens to every
Death story," the author shrugged. "I
was supposed to kill off Winter at first. Death really doesn't do deals."
"Well, I'm glad you did not,"
Jarlaxle retorted. "So what did you
do?"
"Got you to talk a bit," she
grinned. "Then gave Death a little
replacement. Winter's friends from
Sanctuary could have healed her, but Morikan didn't like so much interference...but
they managed to win their case. Good
for you."
"Yes," Jarlaxle nodded. "Right. Can I go now?"
"Why're you so angry anyway? Don't
like working with me?" The author returned to the screen.
"I was in the midst of devising a
very important treaty with regards to Calimport," Jarlaxle explained irritably.
"Then how did you find out that
Winter was going offword?" the author asked curiously.
"Rai'gy was in the room, and he
looked a little more uncomfortable than usual, so I pried it out of him,"
Jarlaxle shrugged, "Come to think of it, Winter may have manipulated him as
well. So when he told me, I went to
find Winter. After that, you know. Can I go now?"
"Okay, okay!"
