Stop and Stare, a twilight fanfic

Stop and Stare
Image #22
Word Count: 5,900
Rating: M
Summary: What you think you see isn't always what's really there… just ask Bella. She's had Edward pegged wrong from the very beginning. Can she figure it out?

The best way to keep people out, they say, is through a fence. Build one high enough, strong enough, or electric enough and privacy is yours for the taking. All sorts of secrets can be hidden when sheltered from prying eyes behind wooden slats or kept on lockdown behind chain-link and barbed wire. You can be whoever you want to be and do whatever you want to do behind those barriers, and no one ever knows the difference.

The problem with fences though… is exactly that. They're fences. Walls. A dividing line. And those barriers erected to keep you safe, or to maintain your privacy, cause as many problems as they solve. What you think you see when peeking through gaps or glancing overtop isn't always what's truly there.

Sometimes, the secrets those fences hide are the ones you most need to see… the ones that teach you more about life and living, about people and love, than you would ever have learned otherwise. And sometimes… well, sometimes what's kept hidden behind those barriers is the closest thing to heaven you'll ever find.

Nearly sixty years ago, Bella and Edward found that out for themselves. Funny thing though, their story didn't start with a fence. Or with just a fence, anyway. Not really. It started with a note… way back in 2008, as a matter of fact. A note and girl.

More than one of each, actually…

~S&S~

EPOV - 2008

"Thanks Marie," I said to her as we stood at the door saying goodbye as we did every week. I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her, my hands going to her waist. Even though she worked for me and I only saw her weekly, I'd gotten close to her.

I had seven women that came to my house every week. One for each day of the week. They'd all been coming for years… every since I first found out about what I would be facing. I wanted to get to know them, see what they were like, and let them get to know my little nuances and routines.

"Bye Edward, see you next week. Same time good?" she asked, and as she turned and walked away, my hands lightly caressed her backside. I knew I had to have blushed or something because my eyes widened at the realization of what I had done. I immediately pulled my hands away and she chuckled.

"Sorry, didn't mean to do that."

"Edward, don't worry about it. A hot, young man touching my butt? How can any girl be upset about that?" She chuckled again.

"Well, I don't know about hot, but a young man yes… bu-ut I was also taught not to ever touch a woman unless she was with me or dating me. My mother would be livid if she saw me do that."

"It's nice to know there are still respectful men here. Even if this is Georgia, where you're suppose to have all the good ol' momma's boys being respectful and whatever, that's not always the case. Anyway, I'm going to go. See ya next week." With that she headed down the stairs.

I started to go into the house when I realized she hadn't gotten in her car. I turned around to find out why when I heard her say, "Jesus loves you".

I laughed at her because that was so unlike her. I didn't think anything of it though, and headed back into the house again. I heard her get in the car and back out, and I waved to her just like I always did.

After getting in the house, I locked it up and tried to figure out what to do. Living alone had its up and downs, but I loved it nonetheless.

As I tried to figure out what to do with myself, I decided some music was definitely needed. It was the weekend after all and I needed some good, loud music.

I made my way to the living room from the front door - thirty-five steps - and to my favorite reclining chair. That was the central command center of my entertainment… most of the time it was music, though I'd sometimes put on a movie or TV show when working.

I decided that I wanted to do take-out so I called one of my favorite places and had them bring me my usual. I loved having places that knew me. I could rack up a tab and just pay it monthly. Not having to worry about having cash or my card on me when I called was just easier.

My favorite song came on so I turned it up really loud. Nothing like loud music blaring to start the weekend off right.

Eventually, I heard the doorbell ring so I went and answered it. The delivery people have a certain ring pattern they used to let me know who they were. I know it was lame, but it was better than running to the door every time someone rang the bell. So… coded doorbell rings were it.

I answered it, thanked him, and headed to the kitchen - which was 20 steps from the front door -and grabbed a beer before I headed back to my favorite chair. I sat down and enjoyed my food. Drank my favorite beer.

Beer… I always thought that was what water in heaven would taste like.

I listened to my music while I ate. By the time I finished, I was getting tired. I knew I had to be up in the morning but I just wanted to listen a bit more. Eventually, I started to doze off so I got up, turned the music off and headed to bed.

Morning was coming whether I was ready or not.

Julieanna would be there way too soon and Sundays were brutal for me. Up early and then busy with things to do and places to go. And yet, Sundays were still some of the most fulfilling days.

I got to bed after finishing my nightly rituals… and woke the next morning before the alarm went off. No surprise to me. It happened that way more often than not.

I got up, got dressed and ran my hands through my hair. It was always a chaos of follicles, no matter what I did to it. There was no use in fighting it. Ever. So… I didn't. I just let it have its follically challenged way.

When I felt like I was all ready, and as if on cue, the doorbell rang.

Ahh, Julieanna.

I would have known her ring anywhere.

And yes… everyone in my life had their own coded ringing sequence.

I headed downstairs, grabbed my keys, wallet and phone off the table beside the door. I stepped out, knowing that Julieanna would be ready to go.

In short order, we were pulling out of the driveway.

Julieanna always went with me on Sundays since she was my Sunday assistant. We'd grown close over the years she'd worked for me and we often got into discussions that I didn't get into with my other assistants… mostly because they dealt with religion and God. Things that I didn't want to cross lines on. Even though they all knew my beliefs, they never brought them up. Even though they were all around my age or just a bit older, they just thought of me as a kind young man.

I know a lot of people wondered why I always had women with me… and a different one all the time. I heard some of the theories about me. Some people assumed I was sleeping with them all; some thought I was a pimp. Some had no clue. Even after meeting me, they still had no clue… I never tried to set them straight. It wasn't my place and they could think what they wanted. It wasn't their life anyway. It was mine.

We get to where we were going and got out. I went to her door as always and held it open as she stepped out. I was raised to be a gentleman. That's what I was being and would always be, until the day I died. If my mother ever saw me being anything less than a gentleman I'd get my head knocked off, it didn't matter my age, she didn't stand for that, God Bless her soul. She was a woman who felt that woman deserved to be treated respect no matter who they were.

Julieanna and I walked into the building and sat in our usual seats. She always sat on the inside of the aisle and I sat on the end. I loved sitting there. I'd learned people's smells. Weird maybe, but every person has his or her own distinct smell.

There was one scent, one thing that I particularly liked, and I waited for it every Sunday morning.

As I sat there, I felt a bit of air rush past me and finally, I smelled it. It was mixed with something else, something sweet, like sugar and spice… and maybe chocolate? That was an odd combination. You would think that it would clash with her regular scent, but it all mixed wonderfully.

If I didn't know myself better, I would almost think I went there just to smell her, to be close to her. I had no clue who she was. I had never talked to her or even gone near her, but I loved the way she smelled.

I would recognize that smell anywhere.

The hour went by as usual… same old service it had always been. Nothing too exciting ever happened, at least not for others…

After it was over, we got up and headed to our next destination. I always went there on Sundays as it became a ritual in a sense and I felt out of sorts whenever I didn't go.

Whenever I would enter the room,, I was always swarmed by little hands and little bodies. These were kids, blind kids. I loved working with them, loved being with them. I felt connected to them, a kinship of sorts. It helped me with my own situation and made me appreciate what I'd gotten to experience before everything happened.

Julieanna once told me it made her appreciate her life more, too. It made her appreciate what she was giving and would get in life.

I spent a few hours with them and played games… games designed for them. They weren't far off from regular kid games, except that they were geared specifically for the blind.

At the end of our time there, we went out to eat and then back home. Julieanna, while having the shortest day of the week, also had the most traveling to do. She also had a family, so I never wanted to take time away from her loved ones. That wasn't fair of me. That was the main reason I had asked her and hired her to be my helper on Sundays, so she could be home with her family for most of the day.

When we got home, Julieanna informed me there was another note on my door. I was really starting to wonder where the notes were coming. I'd gotten a few of them but they were all signed Sincerely, A Concerned Neighbor. The problem was that the "concerned neighbor" never told me exactly what the problem was. They were just very vague messages. And I was never one to want to offend or upset anyone else and since I had no idea what this person was concerned about… I really did want to know.

I always had my assistants read them to me. This one was no different from any of the others. They all felt like the same paper so I assumed they were all from the same person and not several people. After today I was determined to find out who was giving them to me, find out why they had against me and rectify anything that I could. I was not someone that sat by and just let it go. Especially not after having received so many of them.

Julieanna left for the day, and as always, I walked her to the door, hugged her goodbye and waited for her to drive away. As I heard the car backing out, I waved. I turned back to the house, ready to end the day with some music and dinner, followed by a nice hot shower.

I fell asleep that night reading The Count of Monte Cristo, just like I always did.

Monday came and went.

Tuesday, I had plans for some friends to come over to have a little get together; a BBQ and some fun. We tried to get together at least once a month, but we all had things in life that kept us from seeing each other like we had grown up.

Of course, when you have a BBQ, you have to have music and well, we all loved our music loud and it was loud that day. We danced and drank and ate some awesome food that my brothers had brought. At the end of the day, I was so beat I just changed out of my clothes, brushed my teeth and went to bed.

The next day was the day Anastasia, my Wednesday assistant, came. I had some doctor appointments and had to do some proofreading work. She always helped me most with the proofreading, so I did most of my work on her day.

I woke up feeling refreshed but dirty and a bit hung over. I needed something to drink so I went downstairs, and after grabbing something out of my fridge which looked like someone with obsessive compulsive behavior would have, stood by the window, enjoying the warmth of the sun. Eventually I decided to take a shower before Anastasia got there. Just as I was stepping out of the shower, I heard her distinctive doorbell ring and hurried to get dressed.

I got to the door, opened it and smiled. "Hey Anastasia. Hmm… what do you have there? It smells wonderful. Did you bake me some goodies?"

"Hey, Edward. Nope. You know me; I'm not that great at baking. Cooking gourmet meals, yes. Baking, no! There's a note too, want me to read it to you? You might have a secret admirer or something. You are a hot, young male; you could have any woman you want. That is one thing I have never understood about you… how you have stayed single this long. If I were younger I would take my chances with you in a heartbeat. Well, that and if I didn't work for you." She laughed and slid her way into the house, handing me the box with the delicious smelling treat in it.

I closed the door and followed her inside, going to the kitchen to get a glass of milk to go with whatever was so yummy in the box I was holding. It didn't matter if it was cookies, cakes, danishes, or cupcakes, I was the type of person that had to have a glass of milk. It just went with sweet stuff.

I almost forgot about the note until I heard Anastasia clear her throat dramatically. That was the second note she'd read to me… I think she quite enjoyed it.

As I sat there and listened to her read the note I started to devour the cupcake.

Dear Sir,

Although I have nothing against music, for I find that I love to listen to it quite often… I do feel the need to remind you that we have a noise pollution law that stays it needs to stay at a respectable level between the hours of eight and four. I ask of you to please respect the law. As my upbringing has taught me, it works to keep the core of a neighborhood on pleasant terms.

Please find that I have sent with this letter a gift for your troubles and please think about what I have asked.

Sincerely,

A Concerned Neighbor

As I ate it and listened, it dawned on me who the note could possibly be from… but how? It couldn't be, could it? The smell of the cupcakes reminded me of her, my Sunday morning girl at church. Since I didn't know for sure, I didn't say anything, but it was in the back of my mind.

I went to my doctor appointments and did the proofing work I needed to do. I went to bed early that night, thinking about those notes and the possibility that the good smelling girl could be the one sending them. I still hadn't figured out how but I was going to. I had to; it was like a mission in my mind.

She couldn't simply just be my neighbor, could she?

…I woke up to the sun blaring in my window.

It was supposed to be a beautiful day and I was looking forward to it. Dominique and I were going to the park for a picnic and to just enjoy the sunshine. I hadn't been to the park in a while and I just wanted to clear my head.

Dominique was like a sister to me. We were close and were both really into hugging and touching, just as friends, but still. All my assistants were my assistants for one reason or another. We all clicked but in different ways and each served a purpose in my life assisting me… kind of like seven women to take the place of The One that I would eventually meet and be with.

After the park we were both exhausted, but in a good way. I was in the process of changing my clothes when I heard someone banging on my door. No one I knew banged on my door…

And then I heard the doorbell being rung erratically. It was like in the movies when someone is in distress so I hurried along, shuffling as I put on my pants and opened the door. As I did, a familiar scent hit me…. but I wasn't sure it was real or just my imagination.

~S&S~

Like I said… the story started with a note and girl. More than one of each. So… what's the problem you ask?

Well, the problem was the fence. Not just that protective encasement that had been erected between Edward and his concerned neighbor, but something more solid than that.

A lack of understanding.

Not sure what I'm talking about?

Just wait…

You'll see.

~S&S~

BPOV

"Dad, I'm fine."

I looked over the recipe again and adjusted the measurements. I had to twirl around in a circle not only to unwind the telephone cord from around my legs but also to make sure I didn't step on the ninety-two pound mastiff that my father got me when I'd moved out on my own six months before.

Sadly, what was meant to reassure my father that I would remain safe and in one piece turned out to not be much of a guard dog after all. We found out this past July, when our church threw their annual Fourth Of July celebration, that big ole Bruno was the biggest scaredy-cat in Fitzgerald, Georgia. Once the fireworks started, he howled and whimpered so loudly the congregation turned to see the cause of such distress… just in time to watch him dart behind me for protection with his tail between his legs.

My father was not too pleased about that, but I didn't have the heart to give him up.

I leaned down to pat him on the head as my father's concern poured through the phone line. "I just wanted to make sure. You missed church on Wednesday and I knew you weren't feeling well."

"It was a twenty-four hour bug, I think. I'm better now. In fact, I'm making the cupcakes for Mrs. June's bible study group as we speak!"

It was Saturday so I knew there was no longer any need to worry about being contagious, but I said a prayer over not only the cupcakes but the whole kitchen just to be safe. I also knew that my change in subjects would distract him momentarily, getting him off the phone that much more quickly.

One of the things my father missed the most was my cooking at home so he knew I always took pity on him and made a couple of extras just for him when I baked.

"Oh really?" He stretched out the words. "What kind?"

"Two kinds actually. I have the carrot cake kind done already and now I'm working on the red velvet. Both with homemade cream cheese icing."

His sharp intake of breath had me smiling and I went in for the kill…

"Grandma Swan's recipe." I let it linger in the air as I opened the window and set the cupcakes on the window sill.

He cleared his throat. "Well Bella, I don't want to keep you, I know you're busy, honey."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Okay, dad, see you in the morning."

As I hung up the phone, I turned in time to see Bruno trying to get to my cupcake batter. "Bruno, no! Get down boy." I shooed him down and he scurried to the front door to be let out.

I opened the front door and stepped out on the front porch; taking a long look down my block. A lot of changes in the form of home improvements, I'm proud to say, had been made since the police chief's daughter moved in. For instance, the huge fence my dad had insisted I have installed to keep Bruno in the yard and to keep intruders out as well.

"Bruno, baby; chop, chop," I called out, just in time to see my neighbor's door open and Bimbo Number Three stroll outside. I watched in horror as Mr. Touchy-Feely guy groped at her back and ass. I swore he did that on purpose just to get a rise out of me.

It appeared as if he were still insistent upon having no morals or manners at all… even after I had written him several notes explaining that we had children that rode their bikes in the neighborhood and such displays should stay in the confines of his home.

I scoffed at his indecent display of affection and Bimbo Number Three picked that moment to look over at me. She smiled condescendingly while waving and I couldn't help the scowl that accompanied the faux-smile I sent in return.

"Jesus loves you!" she called out and I gasped as Mr. Touchy-Feely laughed, instantly causing me to cross myself.

"Bruno! Inside now!" I huffed as my four legged friend barreled through the door. I knew Mr. Touchy-Feely read my notes. He probably let all of his bimbos see them. They probably all laughed about them all the time.

The thought that he could be so cruel as a human being left me praying for him even more than before.

Dear Father, please show me what to do. How can I get through to this man? I can't help but think that you will use me in some way to get him to see the error of his ways. I sense some good in him but I just…I don't know, Father.

My prayer said, I went to stand and remembered one last thing. It made me sigh in defeat.

Sorry Father, but I need to ask for forgiveness for referring to them as bimbos. I let my mind get the best of me when she acted out in that way. I know that's an excuse and I will see Father Luke tomorrow and go to confession. Alright, Father, I must go because Mrs. June will be here by six to pick up the cupcakes. Bless the children and the study group tonight. In your name I pray, Amen.

I sat down at my desk to write my neighbor letter number three.

Dear Sir,

I find that today I have witnessed, yet again, another transgression on your part. I am writing to see if we can come to an agreement of some sorts on your public displays of affections to the nice female guests…

I had to grit my teeth as I wrote that.

…that seem to come at all hours of the day. As I have mentioned before, we live in a wonderful neighborhood filled with beautiful children that love to ride their bikes or play in their yards and I feel as though your displays give them an impression that would not sit too well with the pillars of the community. Please take my note into serious consideration. Thank you.

Sincerely,

A Concerned Neighbor

I grabbed an envelope from the drawer, placing the letter inside.

I took a chance glance at the clock, only to see that I had exactly thirty minutes to ice the cupcakes and box them up.

Just like clockwork, Mrs. June was on time and I helped her carry the boxes to the car.

I stood there for a moment as she drove away, enjoying the sounds of the birds and the to and fro of the breeze as it took me back to childhood days. I watched the ice cream truck drive down the street, and with that, I called out to Bruno and we spent the rest of our evening watching the kids play from our porch swing.

%%%%

"Here you go, Dad. You only get two this time. One of each… and no sulking. You know what Dr. Cullen said."

It was just after Sunday's service and my dad was chomping at the bit to dive into Grandma Swan's famous cupcakes that I had made the night before. He had walked me to my car and insisted on following me home.

"Dad, it's fine. Bruno and I are going to turn in early tonight. Honestly, it isn't necessary."

Finally he came to his senses, realizing it's not best to argue with a Swan. "Alright, Bella, your old man can take a hint. I just worry about you being alone all the time. Why don't you invite Michael over? I'm sure he misses you."

Ah, Michael Newton. Here we go again.

I couldn't help but shake my head. "Dad, I haven't seen Michael in a year. Besides, he got married three months ago."

The look on his face said it all. "He did? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Well, for one thing, I haven't dated Michael in over three years. For another thing, I knew it would upset you. You've been planning our wedding for us since the fifth grade." I patted my father on the back, paying him my condolences on yet another failed attempt to marry me off.

He'd finally accepted that I wouldn't budge on the topic of my love life no more that he would his own. We were similar in the aspect. I always told him that I would know when the right guy came along, and much to his displeasure, he finally decided to throw in the towel and let me handle my own life.

For the most part.

I knew he worried about me since I hadn't been on a date in forever though.

"See you on Wednesday, Dad." I leaned up and gave him a peck on the cheek.

Once inside the car, we waved our goodbyes and went our separate ways.

I stopped by the store to pick up some groceries for the week. I was grabbing lemons for the lemon tarts I would be making for Mrs. June's bible study group the following Saturday, when my thoughts turned back to my neighbor.

Bruno and I had been sitting on the porch when I noticed the take-out guy show up again for the third time in a week and my heart kind of broke.

All these women and they won't even cook for him?

I shook myself of the thought and moseyed on down the aisle.

%%%

"Bruno! No!"

It was too late to stop the inevitable. Things were going so well, I'd thought, with not a peep from next door since Saturday.

And then Tuesday arrived.

Music shook my kitchen windows and Bruno howled his signature tune before slamming into me, effectively knocking the bowl of batter down the front of my blouse. It was a good thing it was only a test run or I would have been in quite the pickle.

"Bruno boy, calm down. It's alright." I cooed at him… and his tail knocked me in my backside.

"Hey!" I shouted as he scurried off into the living room.

Grabbing a hand towel to try and salvage what was left of my blouse, I took a gander out the window in time to see not one, oh no, but three bimbos hanging all over Mr. Touchy Feely outside by his grill.

Geez, who could blame them though? He was kind of hot!

All that hair and a butt to boot!

I gasped as the thought filtered through my mind and immediately promised The Man Upstairs to say three Hail Mary's for my improper thoughts. I also asked him to please help me with the situation I had found myself in with the neighbor.

I stood up to smooth out my dress and memories of my Grandma Swan came flooding back. It hit me like a ton of bricks and I thanked The Man Upstairs for blessing me with the answer. The memory was so clear, I was eight and was having a hard time making friends at school…

"Grandma, how do you get people to like you?"

"Oh sweetie, that's easy. Kindness and food." I giggled as she took a dab of icing and touched my nose. "My mother use to say you can catch more bees with honey than with vinegar. So always be kind and let Grandma do the rest."

She sent me to school the very next day with twelve cupcakes, strawberry with pink icing and sprinkles.

I went home with twelve new best friends.

I laughed to myself and went to finish up the batch of cupcakes. While they cooled, I sat down at my desk to write my neighbor letter number four.

Dear Sir,

Please find that I have sent with this letter a gift for your troubles and please think about what I have asked.

Sincerely,

A Concerned Neighbor

Pleased with the note that I had written, I turn my attention back to the mission at hand and that was to make my neighbor become my friend.

Deciding to wait till morning, however, might not have been such a good idea.

I had just sat the box with the note and my famous chocolate cupcakes with French-vanilla butter cream frosting down on his porch, when he caught my eye.

He was looking right at me and I couldn't stop the blush that crept up on my cheeks. I politely nodded to him at his window. It was odd, but he didn't nod back. Feeling slightly uncomfortable, I retreated back to my yard. I couldn't help the feeling that I was missing something about him. It was almost gnawing at me, but alas, I went home to my Bruno.

%%%%

I fidgeted at my desk and chastised myself for being the peeping tom that I was. It was like my eyes were glued to the window and the door just waiting, watching… and for nothing, apparently.

It had been twenty-four hours and he had yet to show the decency to ring my doorbell to apologize or to talk. I even said compromise in my note and still!

Nada.

Nope.

Nothing.

It wasn't until I saw her pull up in his driveway and sprint across the yard, practically throwing herself at him, that I decided I had waited long enough.

Of course, I still waited until she left.

I couldn't fathom a single reason why I felt drawn to his door. Or what compelled me to bang so loudly. All I knew was that I couldn't stand his rudeness any longer and I had to physically talk to him. The lines of acceptable behavior had been too far breached.

I quickly told The Man Upstairs that I would repent later…

"Hey, open up! I know you're in there. Oh, yes I know!" I banged on the door like a mad woman and started ringing his stupid bell.

I heard feet shuffling from inside and I felt my heart pounding out of my chest. I knew something was about to happen and it was going to change everything. I just didn't know how bad or how good it was going to be…

He opened the door.

Every ounce of rotten filth I was about to sling his way left my mind when he smiled.

"May I help you? Are you in distress?" He started. "Hey, wait a minute!" He took a step forward toward me.

He started sniffing around me, at me and then he leaned in really close. I was frozen in place, my mouth gapping open, looking like a fish out of water.

And then he reminded me why I was there in the first place.

"Hey, you're the Smelly Good Girl."

I cut my eyes at him in an instant over his rude statement. "What did you just call me, Mr. Touchy-Feely Guy?"

"Mr. Touchy-Feely Guy?" And then it dawns on him. His expression changes. "It's you? You've been leaving the notes? You're my neighbor?"

It's then that my conscience got the better of me and I got sidetracked.

"Well, umm…You saw me yesterday and I just didn't understand why you were avoiding me?" I clammed up and tried to start again, "It's just that I thought we had an understanding and when you didn't come over to apologize, I thought maybe we should talk in person." I sighed and silently prayed to The Man Upstairs for help getting me out of the mess I'd got myself into.

I really wasn't expecting him to be that handsome and disarming up close. I was flustered!

He reached out to take my hand and that's when I realized he was looking right through me.

"You're blind!" I gasped, realization dawning.

"Yes, I am."

The girls… the touching…

I groaned in horror as everything began to click into place.

He chuckled quietly at the sound. "Would you like to come inside? We can discuss this 'misunderstanding' over a cupcake. They're really good… a concerned neighbor left them for me. What do you say?"

~S&S~

With a new understanding of how incredibly wrong she had been about her neighbor, Bella accepted his invitation… and those same barriers that keep people out? Well, for these two they were finally mended.

Funny how that works, now isn't it?