Friendship Dies and True Love Lies
Summary: Merlin's always loved Arthur and now Arthur's marrying Gwen. On the day of Arthur's wedding the best man doesn't show, turns out he was in an accident.
Pairings: Arthur/Gwen, Arthur/Merlin, Arthur/Others mentioned.
Rating: R
Warnings: Swearing, angst, possible ooc-ness – bitchy Gwen, male/male sex.
Notes:*Title taken from the poem off Doctor Who: Demons run when a good man goes to war.
Demons run, when a good man goes to war.
Night will fall and drown the sun,
when a good man goes to war.
Friendship dies and true love lies.
Night will fall and the dark will rise,
when a good man goes to war
I've never, ever, written Merlin/Arthur before and it's un-beta'd.
I don't know anything about the American or English uni systems so I'm going with the one I know. Don't really know hospitals on the visitors side.
Also haven't seen beyond season one.
Written for this prompt at kinkme_merlin .
"I'm going to propose to Gwen."
It was the first thing Arthur said when he walked into Merlin's flat, no greeting just heartbreak in a sentence. Merlin looked up at Arthur from where he was sitting, reading, on the sofa not quite meeting the blue eyes of his best friend, "you're what?"
"I'm going to propose to Gwen, I'm going to ask her to marry me Merlin. How difficult is that to understand?"
Arthur rolled his eyes in exasperated fondness before moving to sit next to the skinnier man, Merlin had been silent for a while which made Arthur sigh and nudge him with his shoulder "say something, mate."
"Don't."
The word was barely whispered as it passed Merlin's lips but it hung in the air between them, "pardon?" Arthur's nostrils flared in the way they always did when he was angry.
"Don't. Don't propose to Gwen, don't marry her."
"Why the fuck not?"
Merlin swallowed and folded over the corner of a page in his book, hands shaking before he set it down on the arm of the sofa. Turning to Arthur his cheeks flushed pink Merlin licked his lips before quickly leaning in and pressing his lips to Arthur's for a brief second, he pulled away and looked the blond in the eye "because I love you."
They stared at each other with wide eyes before Arthur threw himself off the sofa only to start pacing, "but Gwen's your best friend."
"You're my best friend Arthur."
"Then she's your oldest friend."
"Nuance."
Arthur whirled around gracefully as stared at Merlin "how can you be so blasé about this?"
Merlin stood in anger knocking his book to the ground "because I've been in love with you since the day we met!"
"The day we met? Merlin that was six years ago on the first day at uni, you've never said anything before now!"
"You were never serious before now! You'd never dated anyone beyond six months, not Sophia, or Lance or Frank or Jessica or Sally. The six month mark and they'd be gone, you're nearing six months with Gwen and I thought she'd be gone too! Instead you're going to propose!" The fight seem to leave Merlin at once and he sank onto the floor, eyes hot and burning trying to swallow passed the lump in his throat as he whispered "propose."
Watching his best friend fall apart was difficult for Arthur but knowing he was the cause made his chest ache, so he turned around and walked out of the flat shutting the door softly behind him. He leaned heavily against is hearing Merlin's sobs as they got louder and louder.
Merlin had a good cry and avoided both Arthur and Gwen for the rest of the week, it was easy as he spent most of his time in the library writing his dissertation or tutoring for the second year children's literature paper. He was leaving the classroom with one of his students who was questioning the mark on her essay when he noticed Morgana waiting for him.
Sighing he turned to the student "Sarah, you need to book a time with me via email or come to my set office hours so we can go over your essay in private. Okay?" The girl nodded and he sent her on her way before heading towards Morgana unsurprised when she hugged him tightly whispering "I'm sorry" in his ear.
"It's alright" he smiled wanly at her as he pulled back, "it had to happen sometime and Gwen's a sweetheart."
"That she is."
Merlin thanked his lucky stars that Morgana didn't push it, she may have been Arthur's step-sister but she had always been closer to Merlin in relationship and looks. With their dark hair, pale skin and blue eyes they had a strong similarity over Morgana and Arthur whose blond hair and tanned skin contrasted with her complexion.
"I assume you got the text? For the pub tonight."
"Yeah, wasn't planning on going though."
Morgana stopped and pulled Merlin around to face her "you have to go! Everyone will think you don't approve if you don't show up."
Biting his lip Merlin didn't answer for a moment, "I don't approve. I want him, I love him."
"I know you do" her face was the picture of pity and she murmured again "I know you do."
XXX
Their friends were already at the pub when they arrived together, Merlin and Morgana sat down opposite Arthur and Gwen, Gwaine and Freya between them as they sat in the booth.
"Now that everybody's here" Arthur glared at Merlin, "Gwen and I have an announcement. We're engaged."
Freya smiled and shyly congratulated the pair as Gwaine spat out the mouthful of beer he'd just taken a gulp of before glancing between Merlin and Arthur. "Uh, congrats man" he said a little unsurely.
Morgana smiled and squeezed Merlin's hand under the table, he was clutching at her hand in return, so tightly that she must have been able to feel her bones grinding together. He forced a grin "best wishes Gwen."
The dark girl had been watching him for his reaction and smiled brightly after he spoke, she'd had a suspicion that Merlin's feelings for Arthur were more than platonic but she'd never said anything and neither had he. Perhaps now he'd be able to move on without anyone other than Morgana, Gwaine and Arthur ever knowing his true feelings.
"Merlin?" Arthur's voice cracked through his fog "I'd like to ask Merlin, if-" he made sure he'd got Merlin's attention before continuing. "If you'd be my best man?"
Merlin was sure he could feel the colour fall from his face, as he stared at Arthur in disbelief. It wasn't until Morgana squeezed his hand tighter that he reacted "what can I say? Of- of course" judging by the looks on Gwen's and Freya's faces he had pulled of surprised quite well despite being insulted that Arthur ask him such a thing.
"Excuse me. Little boys room, didn't have time to go before we left" he explained when they all looked him oddly. Merlin hurried off to the bathroom where he rested his hands on either side of the sink unable to catch his breath.
The door opened and he looked up in the mirror to find Arthur staring back at him, "can't you just be happy for me, Merlin?"
Buying time Merlin splashed water on his face, it had the added bonus that he could look away from Arthur for a few moments. "No Arthur, I can't be happy for you. Not when being happy for you means I compromise my own happiness, I am in love with you and you don't have the decency to-" he shook his head knowing there was no use trying to get through to Arthur.
"Decency to what, Merlin?" Arthur growled.
"To tell me you don't love me. To let me go and find someone who will, you keep pulling me back into your world and I can't get free."
"Do you want to?"
Merlin slumped against the wall and stared at the blond then shrugging "I don't know. I don't want to lose your friendship and I've been fooling myself for all these years that I'd rather be in your life as your friend than not be in it at all, but I don't know if I can do that anymore. Gwen was mine she was my friend, my only friend and now she's yours. She's something I never can or will be, and that makes me feel so sick."
"You have other friends, Merlin."
"But they were yours first," he wiped at the tears that fell hotly down his cheeks. Waiting for Arthur to speak was torture for Merlin, but when he did he wished the prat had never opened his mouth.
"We should get back before they start wondering where we are."
"Of course" Merlin moved passed Arthur and out of the bathroom without looking at the blond, they moved towards their friends in silence.
"So, when's the wedding?" Morgana asked, after Arthur had sat down, trying to keep the peace.
Gwen and Arthur shared a look, "June."
Whistling under his breath Gwaine's eyebrows rose but, again, it was Merlin who spoke, "June as in two months? What, are you pregnant?"
"Merlin! How could you even ask that? You know I don't believe in sex before marriage" Gwen's eyes welled with tears and Merlin felt a little bit guilty.
"Sorry, Gwen but I don't understand, none of us do." The other three at the table nodded along with Merlin "you've been together six months, you don't live together so why are you getting married so soon?"
"Merlin has a point, you can't just ignore our questions. Whoever you tell will have these questions, they may not ask but they'll speculate" Gwaine said seriously.
They stayed there in silence for a while no one wanting to speak and eventually Merlin stood up "I'm going home."
"I'll come with you, you can walk me home" Morgana made to stand but he put his hand on her shoulder keeping her in her seat.
"No, I'm going home to Ealdor."
"Why?"
Merlin turned his sad eyes onto Arthur "you know why. I'll be back for the wedding, just tell me when and where. See you later" Gwaine clapped him on the back, Freya just smiled but Morgana and Gwen hugged him tightly and Arthur didn't move and he never took his eyes off Merlin.
Turning away from the table Merlin sloped towards the door off the pub aware of his friends watching him but he didn't turn back. When the pub door had swung shut behind him Morgana turned on Arthur leaning into her brother's face and hissing "I hope you're happy."
She followed the path Merlin had taken to door but she turned around to glare at Arthur before slamming the door shut.
"What was that about?"
"I don't know," Arthur murmured avoiding everyone's eyes. "Does it matter?" he slung his arm over Gwen's shoulder and pulled her close "we've got a wedding to plan."
XXX
With a heavy heart Merlin left Ealdor two months later, he'd spent his days in his old village with his mother and Uncle Gaius. He'd got a large percentage of his dissertation done and after a few emails with the lecturer he stopped tutoring.
"There you are sweetie," Hunith smiled at her son as she straightened the bowtie of his tuxedo before handing him his keys "enjoy the wedding and try to smile."
"Yes mum."
"And give Gwen and Arthur my best and don't forget to give them the presents" she leaned up to peck his cheek.
"I will mum and I'll be home later tonight."
Hunith sighed but said nothing, they'd had enough arguments about his decision to leave his flat in the city she didn't want him to leave on a sour note.
"Love you mum."
"I love you too, Merlin. Drive safe."
He smiled and stepped into the car, waving as he put on his seatbelt before reversing out the drive and leaving Ealdor with Hunith watching him.
XXX
"Where the fuck is he? It's the bride who's supposed to be late not the best man!"
"Arthur, calm down. I'm sure Merlin will be here soon, maybe there's traffic."
"In Ealdor" Arthur's voice was dripping with sarcasm as he stared at Gwaine. "Fucking bastard won't show, just because he disapproves-"
"He's in love with you, it's hard for him see to you marry someone else especially if that someone else is his friend."
Arthur took a deep breath letting it go slowly.
"And you shouldn't swear in a church, mate, it's not right."
"Christ Gwaine, you think I give a shit about that?"
Gwaine grinned and scratched a hand through his beard but didn't get the chance to speak as Arthur's mobile rang.
"Mate shouldn't you turn that off? Or at least stick it on silent?"
Pulling his phone out of his jacket pocket Arthur read the name on the screen before answering "Hello, Hunith?"
"Arthur, it's Merlin."
"What about Merlin?" Gwaine looked over a worried frown marring his features.
"He's been in an accident. The police rang me but can't tell me anymore and he's in my car. I get hold of anyone else, I don't know what's going on I can't get to the hospital" she sobbed. "I know it's your wedding but-"
"I'll head over to the hospital now, and I'll get Gwaine to come pick you and Gaius up."
"Thank you Arthur, I know you've had a falling out and he may not deserve your friendship but it's clear you love him."
"I- I'll get back to you with any information I get. Goodbye."
Arthur undid his bow tie and turned to Gwaine "I need you to go Ealdor to Merlin's house and pick up his mother and uncle and take them to the hospital."
"The hospital?"
"Merlin's been in a crash, the police let Hunith know but she doesn't know anything more. I'm going to the hospital now" Arthur headed for the door stopping when Gwaine spoke.
"You're leaving your wedding for someone who you haven't spoken to in months, sure it's right thing to do?"
"Of course it is. Merlin's well, Merlin, I can't marry Gwen not knowing if he's dead- she'll understand."
Gwaine didn't say anything else and let Arthur leave, before heading for his car and driving to Ealdor.
Arthur entered the church searching to rows for Morgana, when he found her he pulled her out into the aisle, ignoring the eyes on them. "We have to get to the hospital. Merlin's been in an accident."
"What about Gwen? What about your wedding?"
He sighed "she won't mind. Besides Merlin was right" his voice had become small and sad.
Together they walked out of the church, in the car park Arthur stopped before the limo that Gwen was in and knocked on the window. The black window opened and Gwen's smiling face looked at him "Arthur! You can't see me before the wedding it's bad luck."
"We're going to have to postpone."
"Why?"
"Merlin's in hospital."
Her brown eyes widened "and you're leaving me at the altar to go and see him."
"He could die."
"If you go, now, to him then I won't ever marry you. You have to choose Arthur, him or me."
Arthur reeled back as if struck "the fact that you're making me choose is proof enough of your character. He's-"
"Not spoken to you for months, doesn't like the fact that you're marrying me and left. Why does he deserve your friendship now?"
"Because I deserted him before and he needs me now and I won't leave him again."
"Then you leave me. For good."
Narrowing his eyes Arthur stared at her in disbelief "if that's the way you want it, then fine." He turned and walked away to his own car where Morgana was waiting and they drove off to the hospital.
XXX
When they arrived Arthur rushed to the front desk "Merlin Emrys" he barked out and the nurse glared at him. "He's in surgery, take a seat and the doctor will be out to see you when he can."
Arthur and Morgana were waiting for about an hour before the doctor came out "Emrys," the tall man called out and the stood to speak to him.
"I'm Doctor Leon Walker, Mr Emrys' surgeon and I have to ask how are you related to him."
"I'm his sister."
Dr Leon nodded and spoke to her "your brother sustained multiple rib fractures and severe bruising. If he had have been hit a inch more to the left of right he would have died, he's very lucky."
"So why was he in surgery?"
"When the paramedics first arrived on the scene your brother couldn't feel anything in his legs and we had to check his spine. The surgery was simply putting a camera in and assessing the damage, of which there is none. When he wakes he should be able to move and feel just fine."
"Thank you doctor, may we see him?"
"Of course, I'll take you to him" they followed the doctor down corridors and through doors until they reached a room with only one bed where Merlin was lying comatose, pale and broken.
Once the doctor left Arthur rushed forward to sit next to the bed; picking up one of the pale hands and holding it gently in his own.
"Arthur?"
"Not now Morgana. Can you ring Hunith and let her know?"
"Sure," she whispered quietly before leaving to the hallway and Arthur was grateful for his her silence. He just stared at Merlin's pale face beneath the bruises and stroked the back of the limp hand that he was clutching not daring to think about what could have happened, about Merlin never knowing that he was right about Arthur, and Gwen.
Morgana came in "Hunith and Gaius are about five minutes away, apparently Gwaine drives like the devil is following him. I'm going to meet them out front and bring them through. So say what you need to, to him before you don't have the chance again."
Turning as she opened the door Arthur called out to her "Morgana. Thank you." She smiled sadly at him before disappearing behind the shut door.
Reaching over to brush Merlin's fringe away from his closed eyes "you were right, Merlin. I was never serious about anyone, not even Gwen I suppose. I was always waiting for something else to come along, someone who could make me laugh and infuriate me and-" Arthur choked back a sob. "All alone I was waiting for you. Wake up, idiot and let me love you like you deserve."
The only response was the continuous, monotonous beeping of the machine registering Merlin's heart rate, Arthur's ragged breathing filled the silence as he tried to get his emotions under control.
The door clicked open and he dropped Merlin's limp hand onto the bed then stood to greet Hunith and Gaius. Hunith rushed forward and took Arthur's place in the seat next to the bed holding her son's hand, tears flowing freely over her cheeks.
"He's going to be alright Hunith" Gaius intoned as he placed a hand on her shoulder but his face was worried.
"Arthur, dear," Hunith reached over with her free hand, holding it out until Arthur took it. "Thank you for coming. He'd be very grateful."
He smiled at her "I know. I'll see him when he wakes up."
"You're going?"
"No. I'm staying."
Hunith smiled at him through her tears and nothing more was said.
XXX
It took a couple of hours for Merlin to wake up. Hunith was asleep in the chair beside the bed, Arthur was sitting next Merlin's knees on, Morgana and Gaius had gone to the cafe to get some food and cups of tea.
Merlin groaned and his eyes fluttered which made Arthur lean over to look at him "Merlin, Merlin you're okay. Just breathe."
"Hurts." He gasped out.
"I know, just hold on I'm going to call for the nurse."
"Wait" Merlin's eyes opened and he pinned Arthur with a stare. "Why are you here?"
"Because you were dying, I couldn't let you die without seeing you again."
Frowning Merlin sighed and licked his dry lips "but why aren't you with Gwen?"
"We didn't get married. I couldn't, knowing you were here, she made me choose and I chose you Merlin" Arthur pressed his lips to Merlin's gently before reaching over to press the button for the nurse.
A few minutes later a nurse came bustling in waking Hunith who smiled as she saw her son was awake and was clutching Arthur's hand.
XXX
Merlin was released from hospital but had to stay nearby in case of a relapse and he didn't want to be alone so he was staying with Arthur in his two bedroom flat. They hadn't discussed their relationship nor Gwen who hadn't come to see Merlin or contact any of their friends, Arthur hadn't kissed him and Merlin hadn't asked him too. Consequently things were a bit strained between them.
When Arthur came home from work one evening it was to find Merlin's packed bags near the door and the man standing awkwardly beside them. "I thought I'd wait so I could say goodbye."
"You're leaving? Why?"
Merlin closed his eyes momentarily "I can't live like this Arthur, in this limbo state of indifference."
"I- I don't want to push you." Arthur ran a hand through his hair and stalked closer to Merlin "I don't want you to regret anything and you never mentioned the kiss at the hospital so I've been assuming you didn't like it."
"Oh I did, I really did."
Arthur raised an eyebrow "yeah?"
Merlin smirked and rested back against the wall his legs slightly bent and spread. "Care to let me show you how much I enjoyed it?"
Grinning Arthur moved so he was between Merlin's spread legs their hips aligned and their cocks pressed together through the fabric of Merlin's jeans and Arthur's slacks. Merlin tilted his head to press his mouth hotly against Arthur's, tongues sliding together as they kissed.
Grinding his hips in a circle Arthur reached down and undid their trousers before aligning their cocks and wrapping his hand around them and stroking as he rolled his hips into Merlin's. Gasping for air Arthur moved his hips faster, rubbed his thumb over the slit of Merlin's cock collecting the precome that was leaking and smearing it over his own shaft.
"God, Arthur" Merlin groaned, "I'm close."
"Me too."
They moved their hips faster and with less rhythm as they got closer to their orgasms. Arthur held back to watch Merlin fall over the edge. Taking in the flushed cheeks, his eyes scrunched shut and mouth parted as his body jerked and his come was hot covering Arthur's hand and his cock which pulled his own orgasm from him
"Merlin" he gasped out as he came. They slumped together against the wall and Arthur pressed his lips to Merlin's neck over and over as he whispered his name reverently.
"I'm never letting you go."
Merlin clung to Arthur's shoulders and giggled "I think you're going to have to if you don't want to be stuck to me." He indicated at the drying come between them "perhaps we could shower and then go to bed?"
"And you're staying?"
Kissing Arthur passionately Merlin smiled. "I'm not going anywhere."