Hello everyone! I know this is late for the Fourth of July, but I was detained with other obligations this week and the story just couldn't bring itself together as fast as I would've liked. Note: this is not a romance fanfiction, nor is it really a friendship fanfiction. I'm not entirely sure what this is apart from a tribute to my favorite Autobot: Ironhide. Also, this is set right before the events of Dark of the Moon, I'm going to say about two or three weeks. I hope you enjoy!
I hold no ownership to the Transformer franchise, I never will, and I envy those who do
On Drinking and Cannons
Caroline Andrews sat in the empty rec-room, two empty bottles serving as evidence towards her recent drinking activities. Lounging on the couch two of the guys had donated to the cause of decorating NEST's rec-room with furniture beyond the typical military issue pain-in-the-ass chairs; Caroline took the first sip of her third drink. Her focus was solely planted on the movie playing from the television across from the grouped together chairs and couches, her feet crossed along a multi-stained coffee table.
Normally, she thought, I wouldn't drink when I have patrol duty tomorrow, but today was a holiday and her activities were just enough to enjoy some peace and quiet on a day dedicated to hope and freedom. Besides, she never knew when the simple act of patrol would turn into a fight to the death with the enemy. She had seen enough convoys, patrol-cars, and civilian cars blown up or showered with fiery death to accept that the peaceful evening she was enjoying could very well be her last.
The decepticons can be very ruthless and Caroline acknowledged this fact with another swig of alcohol. She wouldn't drink enough to get drunk, she thought, no, that's stupid. Having a clear head would give her the best hope of survival in the coming days.
While she was just a patrol scout and occasionally went scouting with the ever famous Autobots, she knew dark times were coming. Arguments traveled fast in such hallowed walls. Hollowed out is more like it, she thought, knowing that the original intention for this building was not to comfortably house towering robot aliens. Nonetheless, this building had become a home, base, epicenter for the Autobots. This place had become home to Caroline as well. With no family waiting for her to climb up the porch steps and sit down to dinner-time, Caroline had taken up permanent residence here, with a small cottage in Colorado for the occasional leave-of-duty. She was one of the few female soldiers to do so. She was one of the few female soldiers in general. Initially, that bothered Caroline a bit, seeing as she would find little female companionship on a base full of male soldiers and male Autobots. However, finding she could easily relate to her new brothers and sisters in arms, Caroline did not dwell too much on the lack of estrogen in her conversations and interactions with other human soldiers.
Leaning back onto the couch more, Caroline took another sip of beer as she felt the back of her head buzz slightly from the alcohol now fully entering her system. It wasn't a state of being drunk, it was more like being very relaxed. When you live on a military base constantly in danger of attack from alien robots hell-bent on destroying every last soldier, there was little to relax about. Thankfully, this had been one of the good days. The boys needed a break once and a while.
Engrossed in the film playing in front of her, she barely heard the sound of metal scraping metal as someone not of human origin entered the room behind her.
"The other human soldiers not on duty have gathered outside to revel in their festivities, why have you not joined them?"
Caroline jumped a bit. She recognized the voice as one of the Autobots, but the way they could easily appear without one knowing it was enough to surprise a person. Turning her head towards the entrance of the rec-room, she saw the silver and black mech standing at the doorway, the cannon-loaded arms folded across his metallic chest. That's Ironhide, she remembered from the files that each NEST member was given to learn about the Autobot personnel. Never having done patrol with this specific Autobot, she tried to remember the information on his file, solely relying on its contents, if she could even remember what that file said in the first place.
All she could recall was the comment that he was both easily irritable and trigger-happy in provoking situations. Only knowing the former could possibly help her in this situation. And that wasn't a lot considering how irritable the medic Autobot could be; thankfully, Caroline had only been in range of the Autobot's rage twice since arriving, both times were because of injuries that apparently hadn't been necessary in the war against Decepticons. As if injuries were necessary at all.
Caroline, steeling herself for whatever this Autobot wanted from her, gestured for him to approach.
"I'm not much of a partier. I saw what they did for Christmas a few months back and trust me, it's not that exciting for me."
The mech nodded, walking forward. "I also recall that particular event. Major Lennox did not do a good job of monitoring your human version of high-grade. If they were Autobot soldiers, they would've earned brig time for such inappropriate behavior."
Caroline laughed, raising her half-empty third bottle, "well, when humans want to celebrate, they celebrate. We need something to celebrate in recent days."
The mech took a seat on one of the hodge-podge couches, nearly breaking it under the strain of his massive weight.
"It is good that the humans allow themselves to raise morale even though they have been placed under considerable strain."
Caroline was surprised that the Autobot would openly admit the problems she has only heard rumors of. Normally, the term classified, or none of your business, would've been used, seeing as she was merely a patrol-woman, but the Autobot didn't seem to see any point in denying the obvious issues of the base. Recently, pressure from the government has threatened the semi-peaceful coexistence between humans and Autobots.
"What better way to raise morale in a bunch of soldiers than celebrating the 4th of July? Do they have the oversized bonfire out in the training field?"
"Yes, I got the pleasure of lighting the fire myself. I do not get to use my cannons quite as much as I would like."
Caroline smirked at the devotion the Autobot demonstrated toward his cannons.
"Permission to speak honestly?" she asked, taking a swig of her beer.
"I am at the same level as you are, human. You don't need my permission to speak honestly."
"I highly doubt that, I hear you're quite the weapon-specialist for the Autobots. I'm just a lowly soldier, but still, this violent nature you seem to take glee in might be borderline obsessive."
The mech, if he could raise an eyebrow, would have, giving the human an incredulous look. No one had ever openly commented on his love for the weapons that defended the Autobot cause. Sure Prime and Ratchet, plus the occasional human, would hint towards his obsessive behavior, but this femme just flat out told him off.
"Is it so wrong to take pride in my title as weapon-specialist?" he activated one of his cannons for good measure and gave it a good looking over. Caroline wasn't sure if he hoped to frighten her, but as he swung it around the room slightly to "test" his arm flexibility, she couldn't help but stiffen as the cannon momentarily sat aimed at her head.
Noticing her discomfort, Ironhide lowered his arm and deactivated the cannon for the time being. Giving her what could be described as a smirk, he nodded his head as she relaxed.
"No, I guess not."
The two sat in silence, both staring at the television screen but neither were paying attention to the four hobbits running from ring wraiths. Neither knew what to say. Caroline had been in awkward situations like this before, but that was when she was around fellow humans. What do you say to a giant robot from space? What do you small talk about? The question plagued Caroline's thoughts as she stared at the mysterious swordsman carrying one of the hobbits to safety.
What she didn't realize was that Ironhide was experiencing the same discomfort. He was the one who broke the solitude of this femme, he started the conversation and now it was dying like the hobbit in the earth film currently playing on the television. Instead of speaking, he took to observing the human woman. She seemed confident enough, brave, and a good being to converse with. Why she chose to enjoy what should be a joyful earth celebration filled with camaraderie by sitting alone in a semi-dark room was beyond the understanding of the mech's processor. Once again, he realized how different humans can be; they were not just a population of mindless lemmings, doing the same actions with no question. They all saw the world in their own way, understood differently, reacted to situations based on their own experiences and knowledge.
Ironhide, while only having minimal encounters with the humans—mostly with Lennox—did see the worth these small life forms that he previously lacked when they first arrived on this planet. A primitive and violent race he had said to Optimus.
Primitive. Violent.
While some humans did fit that category, Ironhide had grown to realize over the past few earth years that this assessment of humanity was unfair and incorrect. Like Optimus, he had seen the capacity for good in these strange beings, particularly through Major Lennox and Sam. Other NEST soldiers, through their bravery, and civilians such as Sarah Lennox have also contributed to this new viewpoint.
"So, if you were enjoying the party so much, why did you leave?" Caroline took a fourth beer from the mini cooler she was able to sneak from the big party's store of alcohol, passing it from hand to hand unconsciously. The two had sat in silence for several minutes, unsure of what to say next. Now was the time to break that silence, it would seem.
"They brought out the…karaoke machine. As much as I enjoy listening to the bizzare sounds that humans call music, listening to musically untalented soldiers lost appeal almost immediately as the first volunteer began"
"Wow… no wonder they call you a hard-ass…" Caroline let a smile spread on her face to let the mech know she was joking.
"You mentioned not enjoying the human frivolities…can I ask why?"
"I just prefer to celebrate in a less wild way…you know? Let my comrades go all out for today, they deserve that, but it's never been my thing. I'll have a few drinks, eat some pizza and watch some movies that remind me of why I love to be American…some comic-book hero movies and stuff like that…"
"You humans, at times seem so strangely the same to me…I'm sure my brothers would agree to that statement, but every now and then, your people surprise me with how different each human can be."
"Individuality: cause you're all different, just like everyone else," Caroline replied, remembering the de-motivational phrase that a high school teacher told the class once.
She chuckled and took another sip of beer. She could feel the buzz again slightly. She would probably have to stop after this one, otherwise the sound of the patrol car—while known for its silence and stealth—would be enough to ignite the hangover sensitivity to sound. Caroline would switch to water and eat a few more slices of pizza to counteract any effects of the alcohol….well, as much as they are able to.
"I can sense you are succumbing to the effects of your human high-grade. Should I remove the temptation your fellow soldiers are failing to avoid?"
"No…this is my last one. I have patrol duty in the morning. Don't want to miss a decepti-creep on the radar because I let myself get carried away."
Caroline, for good measure, moved her leg to kick the cooler out of reach. If it were far enough away, she wouldn't pursue anymore.
Ironhide let out a short rumble of laughter at the nickname the femme, like many of the other soldiers in NEST, had designated to their rivals. Of course, he had heard worse terminology among some of the more zealous humans in the middle of battle. He preferred this tamer version. In a way, it reminded him of his signature Punk Ass Decepticon designation for his foes.
"Judging by your level speech pattern and the lack of bizarre behavior, I would say no Punk-ass Decepticons are going to get the better of you tomorrow."
"Coming from you, Ironhide, that's all the confidence I need. Though, I've been hung-over before and believe me, there's not a swear word I wouldn't use when people are slamming everything shut or yelling louder than if they were speaking into a megaphone. If you're up and about at about 0500 tomorrow, you will know the real verdict of my drinking."
"I've dealt with similar problems myself…got too buzzed on high-grade one time and nearly crashed my patrol ship the next orbital cycle. Optimus was not pleased and neither were the tech bots when they had to deal with the contents of my purged tanks."
Caroline stared at the mech. Did he…did he just admit to barfing up his species' version of alcohol? For some reason, Caroline had previously been endowed with the belief that these Autobots were straightforward, no mischief-making, no unsavory behaviorisms until this point. Now, enter this hardened soldier robot with stories of puking on his patrol ship after a night of partying (or mourning, she didn't know). Caroline was amazed by how human these robots could be at times. Sometimes it seemed easy to just dismiss them as machines. They were much more than machines; they had souls, good pure souls.
"Well…I hope you didn't repeat that. I've heard Optimus Prime's anger is not something to ignite."
"I'm sure I've ignited that anger plenty of times since them, and many times before." Ironhide seemed to be recalling events where this was the case, chuckling at his own escapades from long ago.
"Sounds like you are really close to Optimus."
Ironhide stared at the femme, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. She seemed generally interested in what they were talking about, and that's what worried him. Why would a human take so much care to things that did not concern her? While he believed her to be a decent femme so far, there was something too curious about her.
Caroline sensed his hostility and put her hands up in a passive gesture. For a horrible moment, she feared he would act on his aggression. Perhaps she had gone too far; there was no way to truly know with this Autobot.
"No, I don't mean to pry…I was just making an observation. The way you talked about Optimus, it seemed like you guys were best friends. In fact, it reminded me of my friend back home. I wasn't trying to be nosy…I'm sorry."
The mech felt foolish, for the first time in a long while. The look of shock when she realized he was questioning her inquiring attitude brought him back to reality. This was a good femme. She was just responding to his statement, as he would've in reversed roles. Ironhide had been a soldier for far too long, he was beginning to believe.
"I've seen many spies in my time online; some were, as you humans would say, honey-tongued lying bastards. I do not believe you are one of those beings. Forgive me"
Caroline, shifting uncomfortably, nodded.
"Forgive me, I didn't mean to rile you up. But still, you and Optimus, from what I've seen and heard, are just like my friend Micah and I. We could get away with dumb things with one another, good times."
Ironhide smiled slightly, this femme was alright.
The two sat through the rest of the film, half paying attention to the defeat of the lead-Uruk-hai and the separation of the fellowship. Occasionally they would share a word or two, but for the most part, the human and the Autobot sat side by side in total silence. In a way, both knew neither had to say anything.
Once the credits began to roll, the two could hear the hoots and calls of the drunk soldiers coming in from what must have been a wild party. They laughed as Major Lennox was giving one of his semi-conscious soldiers a piggyback ride, obviously unable to walk by himself.
"Now I'm really glad I didn't go to that party." Caroline mused, partly because she would not have been able to stand straight after partying that much, partly because she would not have earned the company of Autobot Ironhide.
Ironhide mumbled something about going to see Optimus for tomorrow's schedule. He was stopped when he heard Caroline call his name across the room.
"What is it, femme?" Ironhide realized then, he had never gotten the femme's name. To him, she would only be the femme he sat with on the 4th of July. Asking now seemed pointless, seeing as he had never been in contact with her prior to tonight. Who's to say they would meet in the near future?
Caroline walked forward adjusting her NEST uniform, taking longer than the mech had to traverse the rec-room.
"I just wanted to say, Happy Fourth of July, Ironhide." She patted his ankle and began towards the door he originally was heading towards.
"Femme," he stopped her this time. She turned, her expression was slightly puzzled.
"yeah?"
"What is your name, femme?" Ironhide asked, passing the curiosity off as nothing significant.
"I'm Caroline Andrews, sir." She smiled at him and left the room. Ironhide stood there for a moment, contemplating the evening he had spent with the human femme.
"Caroline Andrews, I hope these dark times do not consume you or the rest of your people like they did Cybertron so many years ago."
Ironhide left the NEST rec-room not realizing that, in just a few weeks, he would be consumed by that darkness, as would Caroline in the battle against Sentinel Prime. Had either known, nothing would've changed. They were soldiers, and casualties in war could never be truly avoided. However, for that one evening, celebrating the fourth of July in subdued fashion, they shared their battles and proved to the other that they were not so different in nature.
They were soldiers and soldiers fought together, as brothers, as siblings, no matter how dissimilar in appearance, to whatever end. To whatever end.
A/N: I was not happy with Ironhide's death, at least with how it was carried out. Ironhide was an Autobot who would not be taken out in such a dishonorable fashion. If it were a perfect universe, none of the Autobots would die and the decepticons would lose every time; however, that would be too unrealistic and take away the emotion from the story. In response, I wanted to give him my own farewell. I hope you enjoyed this little oneshot.
Thanks for reading.
-BTF