I Don't Speak Stork

Disclaimer: Getbackers (c) Rando-sensei & Yuya-sensei.

"MakubeX, you've been working since seven this morning. Don't you think you should take a short break?"

Clickety clackety clack click clickety. "In a minute, Sakura. I'm almost finished…"

Sigh. "You've also been saying that phrase for the past half hour."

Clickety clack clackety click clack clickety…

Grin. "Translated, that means he'll be almost finished in another minute. Again."

Chuckle. "You know what MakubeX is like, Sakura-san. Leave him be."

"In any case, I'm going to at least make sure we all eat some lunch. Try and pry him away from the monitor, will you, Kazuki-san, Emishi-san, Juubei?"

Salute. "Fair lady's wish is my command!"

Laugh. "Yes ma'am."

"Yes, oneesan."

Shake of the head. "Men…"

2. 15 p.m and all was well in the land of Mugenjou…

"OI! GINJI! That's MY share you're taking!"

"MMM! Natsumi-chan makes the BEST cakes! MM!"

"You better have some sort of gag reflex button somewhere so you cough up my share of cake back, electric eel!"

Chuckle. "Ban-san, relax, here's another slice."

"Thanks, Natsumi." Chomp!

"Honestly, you two eat like pigs. It's not like you don't get fed anyway."

"It would help if you gave us a job so we can get money to buy good food!"

"I GOT you a job just last week! 500,000 yen! And what did you do? Spend it all on the Ladybug!"

"Hey! She needed a paint job!"

"And even then you had change left over! What did you do with it?"

"Uh… used it?"

"You guys need money management classes."

"For your information, Master, we manage money pretty well."

"Spending the last of your 500,000 yen just because you had the brainlessness to triple park at rush hour in one of the busiest avenues in Shinjuku is not my definition of good finance management."

"You WHAT!"

"S'not my fault that the government officials have lousy sense of judgement! And not to mention they have to share a brain cell between the whole lot of them since they don't know where to put the freakin' parking spaces."

"I could say the same for you."

"Oi!"

"Natsumi-chan, how long did it take you to bake the cake?"

"Not too long. I made it in about an hour."

"Uwaaah! Natsumi-chan's so smart! I wish I could learn how to cook as well…"

Giggle. "I could teach you if you like."

"That'd be awesome! Then I could cook all sorts of delicious food for you and Ban-chan and Master and Hevn-san and Shido-nii and Madoka-chan and Kazu-chan and Ren-san and Juubei-kun and Himiko-chan and MakubeX and-"

"Akabane?"

Yelp. "Where, where!"

Grin. "I mean, you're gonna bake a cake for Akabane?"

"Hevn-san, that's meeeeean…!"

"Oi! Master! Quit hogging all the cake!"

"Natsumi made it for us, not you. Shove off or I don't give you no coffee."

"That's UNFAIR!"

Sigh. "Men."

3.13 p.m and all was well in a particular coffee shop on one of Shinjuku's streets…

"Oi, Jackal."

"Yes, Himiko-san?"

"Is it really necessary for you to play with your scalpels like that in the semi?"

"I am at a loss of what else to do, I'm afraid."

Screeeeech!

"Hey, watch it! Just because you're Mr. No-Brakes doesn't mean you have to be Mr. Turn-People-Into-Road-Kill!"

Grunt.

Sigh… "Men."

4.20 p.m and all was well in the… truck of the couriers…

"ANATA!"

5.42 p.m and all was NOT well in the Otowa mansion.

5.50 p.m:

Amidst the intense battle for the last piece of cake between Hevn, Ginji and Ban and Paul burying himself in his newspaper, Natsumi was the first to notice the strange raven trying to get in through the door. It kept tapping the glass with its beak and rammed itself against the door futilely. (No one said this was a particularly smart raven)

"A-re…?"

Curiously she pulled open the glass door just in time to let the raven tumble in.

"Hai, Tori-san?"

The raven hopped onto its feet from the floor, flapped its coal black wings frantically and cawed a few times before hopping back out onto the street. It looked back at Natsumi who was still holding the door open.

The waitress blinked. That wasn't what one called normal raven behaviour. "Uh…"

Seeing that she wasn't moving, the raven flapped its wings, took off and flew towards Natsumi. A sharp beak caught onto the ribbon on Natsumi's shirt and it tugged outwards, shocking Natsumi into flapping her arms at the bird.

"Aah! Stop! Bad bird! Stop!"

That caught the attention of the other three males. Running over to Heroically Save Natsumi-Chan from The Big Bad Black Bird, Ginji joined in the flapping of hands to scare the crow away. But nothing would deter the black dive-bomber. It circled above the gesticulating Ginji and then settling for Ban, began to pull on his porcupine hair.

"OI! What THE- get offa me, you dumb animal! Get off! Go find a garbage bin or something! SHOO!"

"Caw! Caw! Caw!"

Paul raised an eyebrow above his sunglasses. "I'd say he's already found one but I didn't think these birds were that desperate for food."

Hevn had to laugh. "That's a good one, Master!"

"Master, that's just plain hurt- SHOO! GET OFF! I'm not that idiot of a Monkey Boy! Go bug HIM about your breakfast!"

Ginji, after making sure Natsumi wasn't injured, looked up at Ban's exclamation. Golden eyes rounded. "Do you think Shido-nii is in trouble?"

Ban was contemplating what Raven Stew would taste like as he did battle against the persistent bird. "This rat with wings is gonna peck my eyes out and you think HE'S in trouble?"

"Rats with wings are seagulls, Ban," corrected Hevn with a satisfied smirk.

"Gasp! I've committed a cardinal sin! What will it be, the electric chair or the gallows?" replied Ban sarcastically, reaching for something to throw at the bird that seemed to be trying to pull his hair out.

Natsumi looked at the bird's actions clearly now. "He's not trying to peck your eyes out, Ban-san. He's tugging at your hair!"

"Gee, thanks Natsumi but I think we've already established that fact- OW! OI! I'M GONNA ROAST YOU!" A fork went flying.

Hevn ducked, blonde hair flying. "Watch it! That nearly hit me!

"GOOD!"

"Caw! Caw caw caw! Caw!"

"Ban-chan, I think it's like that English dog you see on old television last time! That, that La-something dog!"

"Lassie?" questioned Paul. "Shido-san's stuck in a well?"

Ban had thrown a miscellaneous amount of cutlery at the raven by now and missing horribly. "We can only hope- OKAY! OKAY! GET OFF ME! I get the hint!"

Getting off his stool, the Jagan wielder marched out of the shop, grabbing Ginji on the way. "That smelly excuse of a baboon had better be dying from a lethal disease or about to die in some horrible painful way involving a giant blender or a chainsaw… either way, I'm gonna kill 'im," declared the blue eyed get backer.

"Wait up!" They turned back to look at Natsumi who threw off her apron. "I'm coming too! You don't mind if I take half a day off, do you Master?"

"I don't really have a choice, do I?"

Natsumi grinned sheepishly. Hevn nodded at the boys. "I'm coming too. I've got a funny feeling this involves Madoka and I don't trust that boy with her condition."

Ban looked at them all and groaned. "Alright, alright! Just don't scratch the paint job!"

"Have fun," called Paul behind them as the door shut.

Ginji, although a little worried about why Shido had sent out one of his winged buddies to call them, grinned as they all filed into the car. "Aw, c'mon Ban-chan, it'll be fun to see Madoka-chan and Shido-nii! We haven't seen them since their last visit a month ago!"

Ban smirked as he got in the front seat of the Ladybug and gunned the engine. "Boy did Otowa train Monkey Boy well. Even at her size-"

There was a loud PAK! as Hevn smacked him with the back of her hand.

"OI, I'm DRIVING YOU there!"

"Male chauvinist pig," remarked Hevn simply beside a sweat dropping Natsumi in the backseat.

Ginji held nearly the same opinion. "Ban-chan, that's so mean! Madoka-chan can't help it!"

Ban, were he not keeping an eye on the road, would have given Ginji a look. "Ginji, she could. She really could have."

"Really?"

Hevn sweat dropped. "Exactly what kind of sex education did they give you in Mugenjou?"

Ginji had turned red at Hevn's flippant mention of that s-word. So had Natsumi. "I think Emishi might have said something or other but Juubei said it was all wrong. And he should know since he's a doctor and all…"

There came a snort from the driver. "That explains a lot."

"Huh?"

Ban shook his head. "Just keep an eye on that crow, Ginji."

"Hai…"

6.19 p.m:

"Where the hell is that bird leading us to?" groused Ban as the Ladybug wound through the roads of Shinjuku, dodging traffic and getting stuck momentarily in the occasional traffic jam.

"I hope Shido-san and Madoka-san are okay," murmured Natsumi, looking anxiously out the window.

Hevn patted the younger girl's shoulder gently. "Daijoubu yo, Natsumi-chan. Shido's tough. And he'd die first before anything happens to Madoka."

"You're telling me," muttered Ban, remembering that kidnapping episode about five and a half years before. It had been some time but no one ever forgot that. And no one forgot Natsuki Amon.

Ginji let out a cry. "Ah! He just turned left!"

Ban let loose with a colourful epithet directed at a certain Beastmaster who would most certainly be murdered if Ban had anything to say about it. "Is there ANY thing on the left side that stupid ass of an ape might be in?"

Hevn mentally ran through her memory banks of the surrounding area. "Bank… office buildings… more office buildings… hospital-"

There was a LONG silence.

Then the engine roared. But Ginji's strangled cry made it into hearing. "Ban-chan, Madoka-san may be-!"

Hevn was faster than her blond friend. And louder. "BAN IF YOU DON'T GET US TO THE HOSPITAL IN THREE SECONDS I'M GOING TO PERSONALLY KICK YOUR ASS!"

6.28 p.m:

One frantic car ride, deafening screeching in the car park and desperate questions shot at a highly afraid receptionist later…

Four running figures rushed up the stairs since the lift was too damn slow.

"WHY the (puff) HELL (pant) did they (puff pant) have to put it (pant pant) on the bloody ELEVENTH floor?" demanded Ban.

"RUN." Was Hevn's out-of-breath suggestion.

"Ban-san! Have (pant) you called (pant pant) Himiko-san yet?" called Natsumi after the boys as she kept pace with Hevn.

"Dammit! I forgot!" Ban pulled out his cell phone and pressed the speed dial for Himiko's number as he kept on running up the stairs.

Ginji beside him, grinned. "She's gonna kill you for not telling her!"

Ban gave him an evil glare as the dial tone of Himiko's cell phone began. "Ginji, shut up."

The phone was picked up but there were no greetings. Himiko had Ban's number on speed dial too. "Ban, if you're calling me to bail you out of prison-"

Ban cut her off, giving her the news and got an earful of why he hadn't called sooner. He pulled the phone away as she yelled then yelled back when she stopped.

"(pant pant) So SUE me, I forgot!"

"What do you mean you FORGOT?"

"Bloody hell, Himiko (gulp pant) I was driving! How could I (pant) call anyway!"

"STILL! You- never mind. Where are you?"

"Eisei General, eleventh floor!"

"ELEVENTH FLOOR! Why the hell did they have to put the room on the eleventh floor!"

"Exactly what I'd (puff) like to know!"

"Good thing I'm nearby. Don't do anything stupid!"

"Talk about the pot calling the kettle black! YOU don't do anything stupid like taking the motorbike here! If you start rushing and something happens to you, I'm gonna-"

"Alright, alright. Jaa."

"Jaa."

As he hung up, he could already feel the grins of the others settling on him and he growled. "Get OFF my case already, you bunch of idiots!"

"Is it OUR fault you look so cute when talking to your wife on the phone?" asked Hevn with a large grin. Ginji and Natsumi laughed alongside her as Ban growled again.

-ººº-

Upon reaching the blasted eleventh floor, all four continued running until they reached a certain spot of the place. There they spotted a few familiar figures.

"Emishi! Kazu-chan! Juubei-kun!"

"Ginji-san! Thank goodness!"

"What's going on?" demanded Hevn of Kazuki.

"I'd have thought it'd be pretty obvious considering where we are right about now," commented Juubei in a dry, stoic tone.

Hevn glared. "You KNOW what I mean."

"They've taken her in already and Shido's with her," replied Kazuki, bells tinkling in nervousness. "I don't think anything has started yet."

Natsumi wrung her hands. "What happened exactly?"

"We aren't sure. Shido just sent out one of his crows to get us. We met him just before he went in so we didn't get too many details. All we know is that it started just about twenty minutes ago."

"I didn't know you cared so much to come, Ban-han," remarked Emishi towards the panting blue-eyed half German as Kazuki, Hevn and Natsumi talked about Madoka's condition.

"Otowa's always had my sympathies after marrying Monkey Man."

Emishi grinned. "Does that mean Himiko-han should have mine after marrying you?"

"I'm gonna kick your teeth in, Joker-"

There came a tired voice. "Ban, not now."

Everyone whipped around to see Himiko tiredly coming out of the lift. Rushing to some place in under five minutes will do that to you. Ban sauntered over, trying to maintain nonchalance.

All nonchalance ran down the drain as he berated her for using the motorbike. She yelled right back at him, saying she did not, thank you very much and she was just really close by, baka! It was a good thing there happened to be an absence of nurses around so no one could chastise them for raising their voices and risk getting turned into a simian or being dealt a horrific one minute illusion of dropping off a cliff.

Ban grumbled. "At least you had the sense to use the lift."

Himiko elbowed him. "Shove it already, Ban." Her mind turned to other matters and she looked at him concernedly. "How's-"

He shrugged, casually putting an arm round her in a rather protective manner. "They're inside, both of em'."

Himiko let out a breath and allowed herself to be led to a bench. Hevn, for once, didn't snipe at her and vice versa. Natsumi sat beside Himiko and hugged her sideways. Kazuki looked back to the room they waited in front of, looking up at the lighted sign that signaled that the delivery room was being used.

"And now the waiting begins."

6.46 p.m:

"AAAAH!"

"Alright, that's it, just breathe in… and breathe out…"

Another contraction having passed meant another threat emerging. Amidst the tired heavy breathing, some words emerged, barely coherent. "Sensei… if you tell me that… one more TIME, I'm going to-"

The doctor winced at the very elaborate and graphic descriptions while the junior nurses turned red. The older, more experienced female nurses looked faintly amused at the threats this new mother-to-be was dishing out. As often as they had had screaming wives in here, they had never expected so much from this young, delicate looking young lady. Especially since the vocabulary that she possessed could force a barnacle encrusted sailor to wash his mouth out with soap and then make a phone call to his mother apologizing for 20 years of language that she specifically said she would haul him over red hot coals for.

Then again, whatever she just said about a cleaver and some hot chili peppers was a walk on the beach with lobster dinner at the end compared to what she'd been saying to her husband.

Said husband had been having his hand crushed for the past hour or so and was patiently listening to every single detail of the punishment his darling wife would inflict for daring to do this to her.

"…and then feed it to Beethoven!"

"…Beethoven?" inquired the doctor of the man currently sitting by the bed, having absolutely refused to leave his wife's side.

"One of the dogs that live in our compound," answered the wild haired man with a faint smile. "He's known for stealing Mozart's food."

"…another dog I presume."

A nod was his response. Then he reached over and mopped the sweat on his wife's face with his headband.

"Madoka, you're doing fine."

Madoka, being blind, could not shoot glares that seared laser beams of DOOM into the hearts of men. She did however make an excellent attempt. Laser beams, they may not have been but they were definitely sharp and shiny katanas of Fear. The beads of sweat rolling down the sides of her face could have evaporated from the burning aura she was emitting.

"Shido… don't tell me… I'm fine… when I'm NOT."

"Sorry."

"And if you EVER… do this to me again… I'm going to get Chopin… to use you … as a chew toy!"

"Another dog?" asked the doctor, his curiousity piqued. The only reason neither Shido nor Madoka were about to yell at him for his so-called unprofessional demeanour was because both were rather preoccupied at the moment – Shido with Madoka and Madoka with thoughts of killing Shido.

"A lion," corrected Shido as calmly as one could when the love of your life threatened a fate worse than dying and then discovering that since you've been reborn as a member of the insect family, you're about to kick the bucket again via insect repellent. Or a gigantic foot.

The nurses exchanged looks. The doctor looked confused. "…a lion?"

"Circus stray."

"…ah… I see…"

"IF you gentlemen- ARE FINISHED- GYAAAAA!"

7.24 p.m:

Everyone looked up when the door popped open.

"Shido-nii!"

Shido didn't reply as he trudged out, looking tired. Without speaking, he flopped onto a nearby bench.

Before anyone could say anything and before Ban could offer a sarcastic remark, a nurse stuck her head out.

"Is there a Miss Hevn, Miss Himiko and a Miss Natsumi around?"

All three girls looked up. "Yes?"

"Fuyuki-san wants to see you."

Kazuki raised an eyebrow. "Isn't this rather unorthodox to exchange people like this?"

Before the nurse could form a sane answer, Shido's voice resounded from the general direction of the bench.

"Kazuki, I really wouldn't argue with Madoka. Anyone who does is going to-"

All the males but Juubei visibly winced at the words that were emerging. Apparently, if Madoka had had her way, Kazuki would be facing something concerning pipe cleaners and barbwire that were not meant to be used in that particular manner.

"And Ren-san won't be too pleased with that prospect, I think. So really, don't argue," finished the Beastmaster.

Now, normally Juubei would be the first one to react towards such a threat towards his best friend. But, considering that Kakkei Juubei was a doctor who had been trained in circumstances where the older Kakkei women were also midwives, he had heard more pregnancy stories than he wanted in his youth.

He turned to Hevn, Himiko and Natsumi. "Please go. For Kazuki's sake." The thread weaved nodded emphatically in reply, unable to speak after what he had just heard. All that coming from Madoka…

"…what kind of medication are you GIVING her?" asked Ban of the nurse, coming out of shock faster than the other men.

"I'm afraid we can't release that information, sir," replied the nurse politely as she ushered all three women into the delivery room. The door swung shut.

And everyone turned to Shido for an explanation

He looked up tiredly. There was really no explanation to give except…

"Madoka hates my very guts at the moment so she kicked me out and asked for the girls to come in."

Ban snorted. "Considering that you're the one who did that to her, I'd have thought she might have tried to strangle you and put you out of my misery."

There was a slight pause. Then Ginji looked confusedly at his partner. "Put Shido-nii out of your… Ban-chan, that doesn't make sense."

"To you, it wouldn't," was the flippant reply.

Ginji made a face of utter bafflement before turning back to Shido. Upon several moments of looking at his friend, he realized that the Beastmaster was in such a state, he was unable to retort to Ban's comments. The blonde grimaced.

This was really bad.

Kazuki looked sympathetically at his friend. It was obvious he was feeling guilty and worried sick at the same time. It wasn't the best of combinations. He sat beside Shido, quietly patting his shoulder. "You don't have to look so guilty, Shido. Madoka-san's just very…"

"Unstable?" suggested Emishi brightly.

Shido looked up and glared. Even in moments like these, he would not have the love of his life being insulted.

Joker warily took a step back to hide behind Juubei, trying to placate Madoka's husband. "Just a joke, Shido, just a joke…!"

"Anyway…" continued the thread weaver, giving Emishi a look. "It's not wrong to-"

"Impregnate your wife and then cause her ultimate pain by giving birth?"

Even Ginji had the sense to look aghast and went "Ban-chan!"

Kazuki shot the blue-eyed Getbacker a fierce glare. "Ban-san, that was SO not appropriate."

"Exactly!" echoed Emishi, still behind Juubei for safety's sake. "That's harsh!"

Juubei nodded slowly, somehow managing to glare at Ban behind his shades. "That was utterly uncalled for."

"What? It's why this guy's feeling all crumpled and pathetic, right?"

"That's not the point," enunciated Kazuki pointedly.

Shido just groaned, letting his hand cover his face. Strength of a bear and speed of a hawk he may have had but he had no energy at this point to think of anything else but the fact that his Madoka was in that delivery room, about to give birth to their first born and he couldn't do a damn thing about it since he was the one who'd gotten her into that situation in the FIRST place!

"Being a guy stinks," he muttered.

Ban raised an eyebrow. "Says the one who isn't going through excruciating pain right at this moment."

"Ban-chan!"

8.54 p.m:

About an hour and a half passed in anxious silence. Ban had already gone out of the hospital twice to smoke. Kazuki and Juubei had gotten them all coffee or tea from the nearby vending machine to try and occupy themselves. Emishi was telling Ginji stories.

"So, in the Western countries, they used to say that storks are the ones who bring kids to new parents."

Ginji's face was the picture of innocent wonder. "Wow… hey, I've got an idea!" He bounded over to Shido's side. "Ne, Shido-nii! You could talk to the stork and tell it to bring you and Madoka-chan's baby faster so you won't have to worry so much and Madoka-chan won't have to be in so much pain!"

Even if he was silently panicking, Shido couldn't help but smile crookedly. "I don't speak stork."

"Oh…uh, okay…"

Emishi took one look at the crushed foam cup in Shido's hands and cringed. So much for tea having a calming effect on people's nerves…

"Calm down, Shido. She's gonna be alright…"

Ginji tried to inject some pep back into his friend. "Yeah, Shido-nii! She's got a doctor and nurses with her (although I'm not too sure why since the stork's the one bringing the baby) and Natsumi-chan and Hevn-san and Himiko-chan-"

"Akabane."

"…ahah, good one, Juubei-kun! Hevn-san already said that back at the coffee shop-"

"Konbanwa, Ginji-san."

For the sake of his long friendship with Ginji, Ban had at least the grace not to rupture his lungs guffawing at poor Ginji who'd crawled up the wall ala Spiderman when he realized that Dr Jackal was indeed right there behind him.

"K, K, K, Kon, b, ban, w, wa, Ak, Akabane-s, san…."

There was a clearing of Ban's throat before he looked up and glared at the transporter. "What're you doing here, Jackal?"

His pale lips stretched into a smile. "I heard the good news. How fortuitous, Shido-san. Congratulations are in order, I'm sure."

Shido didn't reply since he still had his face in his hands. Kazuki tilted his head, the bells tinkling softly. "How did you know?"

"Like yourself, I have my sources, Kazuki-san… it is not for me to reveal how I came to know of this happy event." Akabane smiled wider suddenly. "But the reason I came is to offer you my assistance in Madoka-san's case. I am a doctor you know."

There was a long silence.

Maybe it was just his imagination but Kazuki suddenly had the odd feeling that the ones standing, that being Juubei, Ban, Emishi and Ginji who'd gotten off the wall, had moved about a foot closer to the delivery room entrance. And he had no idea why he had the instinct to remove the bells like he always did before a fight.

And as if Shido hadn't been through enough mental trauma, there was the added imagery of Akabane being the one to deliver his first child.

It would have been enough to cause cardiac arrest in a lesser man but Shido was tough.

He cleared his throat, lifting his head from his hands. "Uh… thanks but Madoka's being well taken care of. I trust our doctor."

"Are you sure?" ventured Akabane, fiddling with his gloves. "A friend of Ginji-san's is a friend of mine. I would be glad to see if I could help in any way possible."

"Do you even have any experience with childbirth, Akabane-san?" asked Kazuki, now feeling terribly sure he should remove the bells. NOW.

"Well, not particularly but I'm quite sure I will be able to get the hang of it once I…well, once I dabble in the case. The inner workings of a woman giving birth should be most intriguing."

Had brains been able to emit sound, the following would have been heard in six male cerebrums all the way from the depths of the Amazonian jungle.

WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP. Warning, warning, WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP Severe nuclear meltdown. WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP All staff evacuate through the nearest exits immediately. WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP Repeat: warning, warning, severe nuclear meltdown…

Quite blissfully ignorant of the blood curdling looks/horrified/nauseous expressions, Akabane tilted his head slightly in an expectant manner at Shido.

Considering the colour Shido's face was turning out of shock, Kazuki decided it was best he answer for his friend. "W, well, um, Akabane-san, your offer is most appreciated but Shido has made sure that the best doctor is taking care of Madoka-san. She's really quite alright."

A fleeting look of disappointment seemed to cross the face below the hat. Nevertheless Akabane smiled. "In that case, I will go to complete my current assignment. Please pass on my congratulations to your wife, Shido-san. And please do inform me whether it is a boy or a girl."

He nodded then turned, facing the other four who had their backs pressed up against the delivery room door, effectively blocking all entrance or exit. He smiled wider. "I look forward to seeing you all again soon. Especially you, Ginji-san."

"H, hai…"

"Good day gentlemen." Akabane nodded at them and silently entered the lift. Everyone waited until the lift reached the ground floor before Juubei, Ban, Ginji and Emishi peeled themselves from the door. They all exchanged looks before releasing breaths that had been unknowingly held.

Ban looked thoughtful before gaining a determined glint in his eyes.

"…Ginji."

"Yes, Ban-chan?"

"If I ever use the word "dabble" ever again, electrocute me."

"But-"

"Just do that."

"Okay…"

9.30 p.m:

Nurses passing by the particular corridor where the Get Backers and their friends were, stared at the sight of five full grown men tackling another comrade to the ground in order to stop him from barging into the delivery room since Madoka had let out a loud cry of pain that they could hear from outside.

"She's in PAIN! I have to go HELP HER!"

Emishi grabbed hold of his friend's arm, pinning him to the hospital floor. "Shido, there's nothing you can do! You gotta trust the doctor!"

"Let me GO! Get off me you idiots! Can't you see my wife's in TORTURE!"

Juubei calmly pinned down Shido's other arm, although he was struggling to hold the thrashing Shido down. "It's called childbirth, Shido-san."

"I KNOW THAT! But Madoka's In PAIN! I need to go to her!"

Kazuki had bound Shido's torso to the bench leg. "Shido, calm down! Please!"

"I CAN'T calm down when my wife's in so much PAIN!"

Ginji was holding onto Shido's left leg for dear life. "Shido-nii, it sounds bad but Madoka-chan's doing okay! Kazuki let me listen to the string he put inside! They're okay!"

"Like I'm going to believe that! You heard Madoka! I have to help HER!"

Ban growled as he tried to grab Shido's other leg and not get whacked in the process. "Like you can do HECK about it! Man, she's giving birth and you can't do anything! Dammit, you over grown baboon, HOLD STILL!"

"SHIDO!"

Abruptly the flailing, thrashing and chaos outside the room came to a screeching halt. Shido's eyes widened in heart stopping fear. That had been Madoka's voice-

The door popped open again.

"Fuyuki Shido, get your butt in here NOW!" came the commanding voice of Hevn.

It took Shido two seconds and a half to fling his five friends off him, tear off Kazuki's strings and rush right inside.

From beneath the crumpled heap of men, Ban glared at the delivery room door as it swung shut.

"I'm really gonna kill 'im after this…"

"But I think he just became a father, Ban-han."

"Then I'm doin' the kid a favour."

"Ban-chan, that's really not nice."

"Do I sound like I care?"

"Not really."

"…"

9.32 p.m:

Shido gripped his wife's hand in a silent message as she screamed in pain. Natsumi gripped Madoka's other hand as the mother-to-be began to push. Himiko and Hevn hovered nearby, encouraging their friend. The doctor and nurses stood on standby, ready to receive the baby

Shido couldn't seem to hear anything and everything seemed to be in slow motion. He couldn't say anything, not knowing what to say. All he could do was just grip his wife's hand so tightly, it hurt him.

Her body shook with the effort of pushing and trails of sweat mixed with her tears. But the doctor looked up, eyes full of encouragement above his mask.

"Just one more push, Fuyuki-san. Just one more and it will all be over."

Madoka couldn't see but she instinctively turned to Shido, her milky eyes sending him a plea. "Shido…"

If it was possible, he gripped her hand tighter than ever, as if trying to give her his strength. "You can do it, Madoka. That's our little baby, right there…"

Gritting her teeth, she gave one last push, putting everything she had into it.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH-

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!"

10.28 p.m:

Paul looked up as the bell above the door jingled. He smiled seeing the familiar faces file into the shop.

"Made some black coffee already. Help yourselves."

"Thanks…" muttered Hevn. She followed the rest, tumbling into a booth. Natsumi started pouring the thick beverage into a few cups, passing them to Kazuki, Juubei, Emishi, Ban, Ginji, Hevn and Himiko.

Paul got out from behind the counter and walked towards the table, hands in his pockets. "So, I take it the birth wasn't smooth sailing?"

"Actually, it went pretty well," said Kazuki in relief.

Ban looked up from his coffee and raised an eyebrow. "Nearly four hours of labour is pretty well?"

"There are some who take twelve, Ban," informed Himiko, leaning slightly on him.

"…pretty well then."

Ginji grinned at Paul. "It's a baby boy. You should have seen Madoka-chan and Shido-nii's faces."

Everyone had to smile (sans Juubei who only quirked a small corner of his lips) at that. There were no words to describe how happy Shido and Madoka had been.

Paul himself had to smirk. "In that case… Natsumi, tomorrow we take the day off to visit."

"Yes, Master," replied the girl with a large grin.

"Oh and before I forget…" Paul headed back to the counter and pulled out a fruit basket. He set it back on their table.

"Akabane left this for me to take to Shido-san and Madoka-san."

Ban stared at it in silence alongside the other men before gulping down the rest of his coffee.

He was really going to kill that baboon for this…

About six months later…

"If you EVER do this to me again, I SWEAR I'm GOING TO-"

Outside Eisei General's very familiar eleventh floor, several people cringed as a certain Lady Poison's shouts reverberated from beyond the delivery room walls. It sounded like Ban had been rubbing off Himiko more than they'd thought since all her threats has something to do with cacti and various household items. Including the once thought to be harmless plastic sporks. Himiko's friends would never look at plastic picnic cutlery the same way again.

While Shido smirked, Madoka cradled little Fuyuki Satsu beside him and could only smile and sweat drop. Ginji stole a nervous glance at Natsumi.

"Um… that's not going to happen to us, is it, Natsumi-chan?"

Ginji's wife could only sweat drop. Frankly she had no idea.

The thought of Ren entered his mind and Kazuki suddenly obtained a very nervous look on his face.

Juubei and Emishi exchanged looks and released tiny sighs of relief at the fact that neither of them was hitched.

"And then ROAST whatever's left in a bloody MICROWAVE! DO YOU HEAR ME, MIDOU BAN!"

For the sake of his best friend, Ginji looked pleadingly at Shido.

The Beastmaster shook his head. "Really Ginji. I don't speak stork."

The End.

A/N: First of all... an extremely large GOMEN! to Rabid Lola-san who I promised to write this fic for since MAY. (cries) I'm a bad friend... anyway, Lola-san, I sincerely hope I made you laugh!(cries again) I am SO sorry for making you wait TWO whole months! (bows deeply) If it wasn't quite you wanted, please tell me ne? I'll write another one post haste. (hug!) And thanks for such a fun fic!

To everyone, The name "Fuyuki Satsu" is actually what Shido's eldest son is called in Rabid Lola's series of stories. (Lola-san I hope you don't mind...) I hope you all enjoyed this! If you did, thank Rabid Lola. If you didn't, tell me! (smile) Have a good day!