Note: Hello :) First Fanfiction. This is set in new moon, around the time Bella decides cliff diving is a good idea. I don't own twilight, or any of the characters, unfortunately. Also form the beginning of this chapter up until ' "No, Bella" was written, and is owned by Stephanie Meyer. I'm not claiming to have written, or own it in any way shape or form, it's just there to set the scene for my story. From that point n the quality of writing goes WAY downhill, but hey, I did my best. Would appreciate reviews, good, bad and ugly :) thanks, and enjoy.
1
I stepped out to the edge keeping my eyes on the empty space in front of me. My toes felt ahead blindly, caressing the edge of the rock when they encountered it. I drew in a deep breath and held it... waiting.
"Bella"
I smiled and exhaled.
Yes? I didn't answer out loud, for fear that the sound of my voice would shatter this beautiful illusion. He sounded so real, so close. It was only when he was disapproving like this that I could hear the true memory of his voice - the velvet texture and the musical intonation that made up the most perfect of all his voices.
"Don't do this" He pleaded.
You wanted me to be human, I reminded him. Well watch me.
"Please. For me."
But you won't stay with me any other way.
"Please." It was just a whisper in the blowing rain that tossed my hair and drenched my clothes – making me as wet as if this were my second jump of the day. I rolled up onto the balls of my feet.
"No, Bella!"
Two voices called me.
I froze on the edge of the cliff, as Jacobs voice shattered the little sanctuary I'd made myself amongst the wind and rain.
"Bells, are you crazy?!"
I laughed, with no trace of humour. I'm just jumping of cliffs to hear the voice of the boy I'm in love with, who's too good for me, and has all but forgotten I existence. Don't worry, I'm totally sane.
With effort, I turned to face Jake, and put on the nearest I could come to a 'this-is-just-for-fun' face.
"Me, crazy? Nope. Just cliff diving Jake. Remember? No-one was around and I was bored so I thought I may as well, you know, give it a go."
My explanation trickled off as I saw the amazement on Jacobs face. Then he smiled my smile, shook his head and gave a barking laugh. "You are mad. Course, I already knew that." he said as he gave me a wink, walking to my side and taking both of my hands in his. "Have you not noticed it's turning into a hurricane out there?"
I peered into the sea beneath us. Holy crap. I had been that hung up on hearing the sound of Edwards voice that I hadn't even begun to consider what would happen when I actually hit the water. There's no way I could have swum in that, for sure. I could, no would, have been killed.
"Oh." was all I could say. I was pathetic. I just nearly killed myself, so I could hear his voice. What would it have don to Charlie? Renee? Jacob?
Before I knew it, my arms were wrapped round around my chest and I was bent in double. But this was a different kind of pain. I didn't hurt for the way he'd left me. I was hurting for Jake. For my mom and Charlie. For all the things I put them through, for what I'd almost done. And at that moment, for a second, I knew that I could be happy. Somewhere, in the far and distant future I could see me being happy without him. Getting married, having kids, the whole ordeal. Of course, I knew it was never going to come close to those few short months I'd spent with, I smiled, Edward. It was a relief to think his name. It would always be second best, I would always know that there was something better, but as long as I was honest about that, explained it properly, I knew it was possible. And I knew Jake would have me. Damaged goods, as is. He'd understand. Because of course Jake was the one who I could be happy with. The one who could take my shred of a life and turn it into something that was a faint echo of the happiness I knew.
"Bella! Bells, c'mon. What's wrong?! Bella!" Jacobs worried voice cut through the little image in my head, but my resolve stayed strong.
" I'm fine," I gasped. "Jake, we need to talk"