A/N: Okay so I've never wrote an AVGN fanfic before so bear with me. This is based during the movie at the night where they stay at Dr Zanders. Basically, The Nerd reflects upon the mission and his need to protect his fans from shitty games. This is a drabble and it's trash.

Please don't kill me for my obscure choice of fandom. It's small and thoughtful
Small spoilers for the movie

This was a prompt I got on Tumblr. Basically I was given a fear and a character. The fear I got was the fear of failure and the character I got was the Nerd.
I don't own the Nerd, he's obviously owned by James Rolfe. If you don't know of him then I strongly recommend that you check out Cinemassacre. James Rolfe seems like the sweetest guy on the planet who deserves a lot more than he gets.

Please don't kill me.

Alone at last.

It wasn't long since Mandi had left the Nerd's room to return to her own room. He was resting for the night as it wasn't the standard day for him. Landfills, aliens, FBI... After this is all done, he'll strangle the next person who says "E.T" and "Landfill" in the same sentence.

Fuck it, it was becoming way too much but the thought of failing his fans... he had to stop them from being exposed to the putrid game. The Nerd would destroy each cartridge if he finds them all. They can't become obsessed with the game more than they already are, it just cannot happen.

Tomorrow they'd have to return to the landfill even if the military were on their tracks and dig up the games. He'd personally hide them to keep his fans from knowing. Maybe if the myth was dis-bunked by him personally, they'd stop with the obsession and requests to review the game. Without the legend... the game wasn't special, it was just a shitty atari game.

If they were found then he had failed his purpose to stop the existence of shitty games, to warn everyone about them. That feeling of failing his purpose brought him more annoyance then discomfort or upset. It would seem trivial to everyone else because they didn't know. Kids now-a-days have it lucky, his childhood was absorbed in shitty video games that brought more pain than joy. He wanted to warn them but people seemed to not take his warnings to heart.

The thought of that made him cringe a little as he was reflecting against his own will. Perhaps he had failed what he set out to do in the beginning; stop people from playing shitty video games from his past.

"...What's the point in this bullshit?"

He asked himself that question out loud but... nothing. If he had really failed his purpose, then he would get up, tell Cooper and Mandi to go home while he did the same, shut down the channel and sell his games and live a normal life; that was what he would do. Fuck E.T, Fuck the landfill and fuck the aliens... if he couldn't do something as simple as protect fellow gamers from shitty games then there was no point in continuing onwards.

… However, there was a lot at stake. Maybe it was more than just a shitty Atari game. Government plots, Area 51... it was completely bizarre to think that it centred around a game. If what Dr Zander was true... then maybe there was more to it then what he thought. It wasn't about shitty games anymore; there was more to it then everyone thought.

It wasn't worth calling off the search. There was plenty to do. He couldn't fail his fans, it was a fate worse then death. Every single thing he stood by was now on the line in this weird series of events. His fans, his teams wellbeing... how could he walk away from that? If there's a point where he's defiantly failed what this whole exhibition about then he would stop but right now, walking away would be his biggest failure.