There's A Reason

I do not own NCIS...

Chapter One

Ziva David was dead. It all happened so fast, and was incredibly unexpected. Gibbs felt like he had been punched in the gut. Ziva was in the warehouse alone; once again she had disregarded protocol, and made the mission a personal vendetta. Gibbs, Tony and Tim were racing toward the warehouse when they saw it suddenly destroyed in a ball of fire and a loud bang. They all felt the shock wave pass through the car. Looking at the building in the near distance, no one said a word as contact with Ziva was lost and Gibbs floored the gas pedal. That was four hours ago. Ziva's remains were now being cared for and processed with the utmost respect by Ducky and Abby.

Abby. Gibbs sat in his basement, alone, while the other agents were at headquarters doing paperwork and making sure that every last bit of evidence was sifted through and scrutinized. Ziva was gone. He thought back to only a few hours ago when he had to break the news to Abby. The look on her face when he told her broke his heart into tiny pieces. He pulled her into his arms and held her close while she sobbed, and he whispered comforts into her ear. It took every ounce of Gibbs strength not to cry along with her. As he held her and fought away his tears, he repeatedly kissed her on the temple and breathed in the scent of her shampoo. He wanted to take her face in his hands and kiss her trembling lips, kiss away her tears, make both of them stop hurting so damn much... But he just couldn't do it. It wasn't the right time. He needed to hurt right now.

As he sat and looked at the unfinished toy-box he was making for Amira, he poured himself half a mason jar full of bourbon. He swallowed it down in one shot, then pushed the jar and bottle aside. He began to sand the top of the box while his head spun and his heart ached over Ziva's death, among other things. He couldn't stop thinking about all of the things he knew he should have said to Ziva but never took more than one opportunity to say. He should have told her how much she was like a daughter to him, and how much he loved her. He tried to show her all of the time, but he knew he should have said it more. He told her once, right after she got back from Somalia, and Gibbs and Vance interrogated her regarding Staff Sgt Daniel Krier and what happened on board the Damocles. Once Malachi was gone and the interrogation cameras were turned off, Ziva finished the story for Gibbs. He stood up, leaned over and whispered into her ear, "You will always be my daughter. I love you, kid." Ziva smiled and her lip trembled, as relief washed over her that her adopted Abba still loved her. After that time, Gibbs shared smiles with her now and then, but never again came out and told her how he felt. As much as Gibbs was thinking about Ziva, his mind constantly wandered back to Abby. His Abby. If she only knew. He got a chance to tell Ziva how much like a daughter she was to him, but he never told Abby. He had the opportunity, though. Right there in the basement, after she had identified the bullet that killed Pedro Hernandez as Gibbs', she stood in front of him and raised her voice to him.

"Stop saying 'I know!'" Abby exclaimed.

"What do you want me to say?" Gibbs asked.

"Tell me that I'm wrong! Tell me that I made a mistake with the ballistics, or...

Gibbs shook his head and looked away, ashamed. "No... No, I can't say that."

"Then... tell me how much I've been like a daughter to you, and how much you love me..."

Gibbs looked at her sadly for a moment before asking, "Will that help?" It was only way that he could respond. At the time, he faced the very real threat of spending the rest of his days in a Mexican prison, but he still couldn't bring himself to lie to her. He couldn't say that he loved her like a daughter, because he didn't. His love went so much deeper than that. Gibbs found himself startled at his next thought. Ziva was gone, so suddenly and unexpectedly. What if he suddenly and unexpectantly lost his Abby too? He wasn't sure if it was the bourbon, or if he was having a real epiphany, but he needed to tell Abby how he felt, consequences be damned. He was terrified of losing her friendship, but knew he couldn't hold it in anymore. He glanced at the time on his cell. 0130 hours. He had just gotten a text from Tony that he and Tim had finished for the evening and gone home. He knew that Abby was probably still buzzing around her lab, high on Caf-POW! and looking for answers. Answers as to why they had to bury yet another family member. Gibbs ran a hand over his face and sighed a shuttering breath. Life is just to damn short to not say how you feel. He picked his jacket up off the sawhorse and took the stairs out of the basement two at a time. He got into his Challenger and raced towards headquarters; toward her.

Abby was typing on her laptop, processing DNA and evidence from the explosion that had ended the life of Ziva. One of her three musketeers and best friends. She fought hard to fend off the tears, but every now and then would let one sneak through. She was sad and exhausted. She was waiting for results from Major Mass Spec, and a few other programs and let her mind wander to Gibbs. Gibbs held her so tenderly as he broke the news to her about Ziva. He had been so comforting to her while he was hurting so bad himself, and Abby had wanted nothing more than to ease his pain with her kisses... But she couldn't. As far as she knew, Gibbs saw her as a daughter. If she ever let him know how she really felt about him, it would undoubtedly scare him away for good, and Abby loved him so much that she was willing to take what she could get from him. She looked up, surprised as she heard the bell of the elevator.

"Gibbs... It's late, I thought you went home..." Abby said, caught off guard by his presence. Gibbs walked up to her slowly and pulled her into his arms.

"Abbs..." Gibbs whispered into her ear as he hugged her close and kissed her cheek tenderly, "I've been thinking about things. About Ziva... How life is too short not to say how you feel." He paused and rubbed her back, still hugging her close, and Abby remained completely silent, waiting for him to finish speaking. "Abby... do you remember when you finished the report on Pedro Hernandez, then came down to the basement to talk?"

"Yes." Abby whispered and Gibbs continued.

"There's a reason..." He paused, took a deep breath and forced himself to keep talking, "There's a reason that I didn't tell you how much you've been like a daughter to me that night... It's because I don't love you like a daughter." Abby pulled away from him just enough to look him in the eyes, hurt, exhaustion and confusion written all over her face.

"Gibbs... What?" Abby asked, on the verge of tears, "Why would you say that..." Gibbs silenced her by putting a finger gently on her lips and then stroking her cheek with his thumb.

I love you so much more than that, Abbs." Gibbs whispered, his voice thick with emotion. Gibbs' deep blue eyes locked onto hers, and she finally understood what he was saying. Before she could recover from her realization he said, "I just needed to tell you." He pulled away from her, turned around and started walking out of the lab. As the sliding glass doors opened for him to leave, she called out to him.

"Gibbs..."

He stopped walking, turned around slowly and began moving toward her again, pain and tenderness etched onto his features. As soon as she saw the look on his face, she could not hold back any longer... It had been too damn long. She walked toward him and did not stop until her lips met his and her arms were around him. After the initial shock of the moment, Gibbs immediately responded by kissing her back passionately.

Tony had come back to the office, having left his phone on his desk. He saw that Abby's car was still in the parking lot, and decided to take the stairs down to the lab to see if she wanted a ride home. He was stopped dead in his tracks, just before the sensor for the sliding glass doors triggered them to open. He peered silently through the glass, and watched as Gibbs held Abby close in a kiss, his one hand traveling to the small of her back and the other on the back of her head. He watched as a single tear slid down Gibbs' cheek as he kissed her. Shocked at the scene in front of him and not wanting to interrupt, he silently turned around and took the stairs back up to the bullpen, and then went back to his car.

"What the hell is going on..." Tony wondered as he drove out of the Navy Yard, still distraught about losing his partner and best friend, and now with the added confusion of seeing Abby and Gibbs kissing passionately in her lab. Tony got home and immediately opened his liquor cabinet, choosing not to think about or feel anything tonight... He'd drown his sorrows now and worry tomorrow...

TBC? Let me know if you would like me to keep this going or leave it as a oneshot. Thanks!