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Title: Della Duck, Signing Off

Summary: The moon soldier punched the table, leaving a dent. "My name is Penumbra!" she bellowed, then paused. "What is an Auntie?"

…

"This is a terrible excuse for a ship," Penumbra grunts, wiping dust off a monitor that's been cracked for seven years now. "I don't know how even the meagerest of creatures such as yourself could survive with it."

"You could cut, like, half of that sentence and save yourself the energy," is Della's best reply as she fiddles with the settings on the transmitter. "My meager self survived because I'm Della stinking Duck."

"You do stink, but smell alone couldn't save you."

"You're being purposefully obtuse and we all know it."

Penumbra cracked a smile, which she quickly slapped herself for. "What is the point of returning here? Tranquility has everything an Earther could need."

"Gimme a sec, okay? I need to send a message to my kids." The transmitter began to whir as its record light went on. Della leapt back with a little yell. "Yes! I was worried this thing had gotten acided. Acided-ded? Grammar's never been my strong suit, kids. I dunno if you're the same, but I'll buy you the best tutors money can buy. Or maybe I'll just kidnap them. I haven't decided yet."

"You're talking to a flat circle of glass."

Della rolled her eyes. A burst of excitement rolled through her- stars, how long has it been since she's had annoying company to roll her eyes at?- and smacks the table. "Good news! Well, bad news, but also good. The bad news is that this is gonna take a bit longer than I originally thought. The Spear of Selene Mark 2 got turned into baby mush. But I made some friends, and with their help Mark 3 is gonna be bigger and better than ever!"

Penumbra leaned obnoxiously close to the frame. "If we don't kill her first."

"She's just kiddin' around!" Della yelped, fully aware that she wasn't but not wanting any possible search parties to find the footage in the underground wreckage and be like 'whelp, guess she's dead, let's go home'. "Kids, this is your Auntie Penny. Isn't she a hoot?"

The moon soldier punched the table, leaving a dent. "My name is Penumbra!" she bellowed, then paused. "What is an Auntie?"

"Aww, don't worry about it. S'just a silly Earth word." Quickly realizing that this was getting out of hand, Della reached over to the off switch. "I'll be seeing you soon, boys. I promise."

The transmitter went dead with a squeaking noise. With it went the wind in Della's sails. She slumped in her chair, looking so pitiful Penumbra was torn between leaving her in the pit and petting her like a hurt puppy. She quickly decided that, as a loyal member of Planet Moon, it was best to rub some dirt in the wound. It might stop her plans for a bit, which would be in their best interest.

"You realize these 'transmissions' never left orbit, right?"

Della sighed. "I know. I figured it out while I was fixing the ship." The Duck wiped some dust from her face- totally not in an attempt to avoid tearing up, of course. "I guess... that's sort of a good thing? I mean, imagine if they did get to Earth, and no one came for me. No one cared. For years."

Penumbra felt something in her shift. She didn't want to feel bad for the Earther- why would she? She was a troublesome nuisance that had unknowingly been living right next door for too many cycles to count. Someone resourceful enough to craft herself a leg and rebuild a spaceship by scratch. To shoot at a Moonmite one minute before singing one of its young into peace the next.

Della Duck was... something. She just wasn't sure what.

"Fiiiiiiiine," she decided, groaning. "You may refer to me as Penny."

Della positively lit up. "Really?"

"I already regret this decision."

"See, Penny? It's like I said; best friends."

"I'm going to kill you in your sleep."

"That's an improvement from the slow torturous death you threatened me with yesterday!" She shot some finger guns her way. "Baby steps, Penny. Baby steps."

Author's Note: This episode killed me slowly and painfully.

I have to admit, I was fairly neutral on Della before now, but after spending twenty mins with her in space I love her so much it's not even funny.

-Mandaree1